


RomanOff and On

by PandaTheKat



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Age Play, Bigs and littles are known, F/M, Little Clint Barton, Little Daisy Johnson, Little Wanda Maximoff, M/M, Multi, Natasha Romanov Feels, Natasha Romanov Is Not A Robot, Natasha Romanov Needs a Hug, Non-Sexual Age Play, Protective Clint Barton, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Feels, little Natasha romanoff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-18
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-26 10:54:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 128,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21848530
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandaTheKat/pseuds/PandaTheKat
Summary: In a world where Bigs and Littles are known and accepted, Natasha Romanoff is just trying to find her place. After years of shutting her little side off, is it time to switch it on?
Relationships: Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 288
Kudos: 340





	1. Premise

**Author's Note:**

> Before we get started, I'd like to give a disclaimer that this may not be canon compliant especially in terms of age, sometimes behaviors of the characters. I do not claim ownership to any of these characters and this is simply a work of fanfiction.  
> "Big and Little" idea inspiration came from RomanoffonamoR, go check her out! :) Decided to do a little spin on her Littleverse because I enjoyed the idea so much, and I hope you do too.

This story exists in a world where everyone is classified either as a little or a big. Upon birth, doctors do quick exams on infants to determine the baby's classification and from then on, it's tied to their identities. It was nearly impossible for anyone to hide their status because for one, they're registered at birth. Second, as people grow up it becomes even easier to spot who's a little, and who's a big.

On a physical level, it was quite easy to tell bigs and littles apart:

Bigs develop and grow up like how people were expected to before the outbreak of bigs and littles. Littles, on the other hand are a different story: They don't develop normally in a physical sense. Girls for instance, never have their cycle and don't really develop more than little breast buds. Naturally, littles also lean towards the smaller side of the spectrum and have younger-looking features: Some would even be described as baby-faced. They weren't necessarily child-sized (though, quite a few were), but it was rare to see a little be taller than a big of the same age group.

Psychologically, there isn't much of a difference between the two groups:

When not dropped to their little age, littles typically exhibit the same emotional threshold as their peers do. There are some special cases, for instance toddler and baby littles, who may be on the more emotional side even when aged; but other than that there's not much of a significant difference. Generally everyone reaches cognitive developmental milestones at the same age regardless of their classification.

We'll learn even more about bigs and littles as the story progresses. For now, let's meet our (main and eventually recurring) characters:

**Bigs** :  
Steve Rogers  
Tony Stark  
Pepper Potts  
Sam Wilson  
Bruce Banner  
Phil Coulson  
Melinda May  
Leopold Fitz  
Jemma Simmons  
Maria Hill  
Nick Fury

 **Littles:  
** Natasha Romanoff - to be determined  
Clint Barton - 12  
Wanda Maximoff - 7  
Daisy Johnson - 6  
Lincoln Campbell - 11  
Bobbi Morse - 10


	2. Chapter 2

Even before their mission started, Natasha knew it was going to be a bad day. It wasn't a particularly difficult mission, no. It wasn't even an Avengers-level threat so really, it should be a walk in the park for the spy, but Nat knew better. When Natasha woke up that morning she was greeted by a piercing headache. She wasn't new to this feeling, the sensation alone wasn't what alarmed her: It was the fact that it had finally come and she wasn't prepared.

The headache was caused by her drops, or lack thereof, and she knew that. Natasha Romanoff, like many other agents of SHIELD, was a classified little. The one thing that sets her apart? No one knew her little age because no one has ever seen her drop, not even Nat herself. Typically, a little would experience their first drop around one year after they physiologically reach their little age, or in other words: A person who has the little age of six would experience their first drop when they're seven.

In Natasha's case though, that first drop never came. No, it wasn't a problem biologically, it was a choice, or so they all thought it was. The truth behind first drops is that it's more a matter of safety than the little's choice. Dropping meant exposing their most vulnerable sides and even at young ages, littles have already developed that self-preservation instinct. This was good, because at least it meant no little would experience their first drop in the middle of a life-threatening situation. It assured that the first drop would be a pleasurable experience because you want Littles to want their drops. Because Littles _need_ to drop: It's hardwired into their systems.

The only reason no one's ever tried to persistently convince Natasha to drop was that she never showed any symptoms of pain, deterioration, or worse. That is, until now.  
Nevertheless, Natasha pushed on with the day as if nothing was out of place. She pushed the pain to the back of her mind and left on her mission with Steve and several other agents.

"Two guards by the entrance, two doing rounds." Natasha said into her comms from where she was perched on top of a ten wheeler truck. The truck was parked several meters away from the entrance of a base hidden in the shadows of the surrounding trees. "A lot fewer than we'd anticipated." Nat mumbled.

"We stick to the plan, agent Romanoff." Steve responded.

"It's an easy opening." Natasha argued. The mission was simple: Get into the base, retrieve the weapon, and release the captured inhumans. Nat usually could have done all this on her own in her sleep, but Fury and Hill insisted on doing this mission with a new team: Something about no better way to get proper training than to baptize them by fire or something. Steve at first thought Fury meant literally baptizing the agents by fire, and Nat honestly thought that Steve's version sounded better right now.

"We stick to the plan as discussed." Steve said sounding a bit more firm this time. Of course Steve would go by the book especially with the other agents around. "Skye, you in position?"

"Ready when you are, cap." said a female voice. It was Skye Johnson, one of the newer agents that were with them on this mission. Steve went on just checking the status of everyone and asking for updates, probably to get a better feel of the situation. But Nat was losing patience, and she was losing patience fast. On a regular day, Nat would be able to sit through all this but currently she was nursing a terrible headache. She just wanted to get this over with already.

Natasha studied the scene before her again and calculated her chances. She was pretty sure she can take on these guards and speed up their mission a little bit. With the sound of Steve still rambling instructions into their comms, Natasha left her spot and slowly crept towards the entrance.

She was 30 feet away... 20... And just when she was close enough to the guards doing rounds, she was met with a sharp pain in the back of her head. It was the worst pain she's felt in her head in a while: So bad that she involuntarily gasped as she clutched her head in her hands, effectively catching the attention of one of the guards. As soon as the guard saw Natasha, evidently everyone else was alerted.

"Natasha? Natasha what's wrong?" Steve spoke into the comms once more, but Natasha had no time to answer.

She was still seeing white from the pain, but her senses were telling her that enemies were approaching her both from behind and in front. "Agent Romanoff your status, _now_." Steve said in a more urgent tone.

"Oh for fuck's sake." Natasha muttered before turning off her earpiece. Yes, she was aware that was going to get her in trouble later but quite frankly she had enough on her plate now even without Steve badgering her. If anything, the constant chattering in her ear was making her headache worse so she believed that turning off the earpiece was the best course of action now.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before focusing all her other senses into the situation. Natasha stepped to the side and narrowly avoided a strike from one of the guards and from there, it was like she was on autopilot. Her instincts kicked in and she kicked her leg out as she bent down, swiping two of them off their feet. She then took the chance to open her eyes and really look at her opponents. Just with a quick glance she knew she had this in the bag. For whatever reason, guarding the entrance didn't seem like a priority for the base because if these were the best they got, then almost anyone could probably just walk in through the other entry points.

One of the guards made the mistake of charging her from the side, and Nat simply extended an arm out, releasing one of her Widow Bites and electrocuting the man. From her peripheral vision, she can see the fourth guard approaching her so she made a turn as if to run away from him. She ran towards the base as if making her way to the entrance, but instead of trying to kick open the door Natasha jumped up and kicked herself from the door. In mid-air she did a backflip and landed on the guard's shoulders from which she easily strangled the man until he passed out.

Before the guard fell down, Natasha jumped from his shoulders and landed crouched down with one hand on the floor. As she stood up, Natasha bent forward just as one of the earlier-fallen guards tried to tackle her, causing him to lose balance near her back. Natasha reached back for him and easily flipped the man over onto his back on the floor. She quickly pointed down to the man and released another round of her Widow Bites. She looked around her and once she deemed everything clear, she sank down on the floor and took a deep breath as she held her head in her hands. Now that the adrenaline was gone, she could feel the intensity of the pain in her head. The pain was so bad, she didn't even notice another guard drop unconscious a few feet away from her.

"Natasha. _Natasha._ " It was Steve who'd presumably come to check on Natasha once she'd turned off her comms. When Natasha finally heard Steve, she sucked in a deep breath and tried to get a grip.

"Yeah?" Natasha said casually as she stood up, but as she did she felt her world spinning and her vision getting blurry. She would've fallen if it weren't for Steve reaching out to steady her. "I'm fine." She insisted as she tried to pull away from Steve, but she stumbled yet again.

"What happened?" Steve asked in a firm voice, yet you could hear the concern seeping through. Everyone knew Natasha was a little, and everyone knew she despised it. That's why people tended to try to give her space because they didn't want to piss the Black Widow off. Well, everyone except Steve and emphasis on "try".

Steve had always felt naturally more protective of Natasha. Don't get him wrong: Steve's protective of a lot of people especially his team, but it was different with Natasha. He couldn't ever bring himself to turn the other cheek when Nat was in trouble, and Natasha couldn't really get mad at him for it. Well, she'd get annoyed but honestly that was an improvement. If it was anyone else who'd act towards her as Steve does, she'd probably have their head. Nat liked to tell herself that she was tolerating certain levels of protectiveness from Steve for Steve's sake. Everyone else had different ideas, but they chose to keep quiet about it.

"Nothing, I just got a little banged up." Natasha muttered, and the look Steve gave her suggested he didn't believe that. "I'm serious, I'm f-fine." Nat stumbled on that last bit as her head was met with flashes of searing pain yet again. She cursed under her breath and pulled away from Steve so she could sink down onto the ground, clutching her head in her hands again.

"Nat, you're not okay. I'm not letting you go on like this." Steve said in a gentle yet firm voice as he crouched in front of Natasha. "I'm taking you back to the jet."

Of course that was met with resistance. "I'll be fine. Just give me a minute." Natasha muttered.

"No, I'm taking you back, Natasha. You're off this mission and that's an order." Steve said. There was something in Steve's voice that made Natasha hunch in on herself, but want to gravitate towards Steve at the same time. She took a moment to collect herself and once the pain dulled a bit again, she lifted her head from her hands and opened her eyes after a moment.

"You'll be wasting time bringing me back to the jet." Natasha said, and Steve looked like he was going to tell her again that she was off the mission, but she beat him to it. "I'll go back by myself. I know where it is, and the way back is clear. Cap, just... Get to this. I got myself." Natasha said as she pushed herself to stand up again. She wobbled just for a moment but otherwise, she seemed steady on her feet.

"You keep getting flashes, I'm not letting y--"

"We're wasting time arguing about taking me back to the jet."

"Then just let me take you back to the jet so we wouldn't be wasting time." Steve said in a firmer voice.

"Just let me go back myself, I don't need a babysitter." Nat said, sounding a little annoyed. She usually wasn't so snappy with Steve but the headache was getting the best of her.

Steve looked like he was going to argue one more time, but then he looked up at someone to Nat's right. "Agent Rodriguez." Steve nodded to Yoyo, one of the agents they had with them on the mission. "Can you please take agent Romanoff back to the jet?"

"Steve, I--." Natasha began to argue again, but Steve cut her off with a "now, please." to Yoyo. Of course Yoyo couldn't really go against the captain's orders, so she nodded her head and looked curiously at Natasha. Not wanting to argue more because it all seemed futile, Nat sighed and just went off with Yoyo. She didn't even look at Steve anymore as she walked away with the agent.

Much to her dismay, on the way back to the jet Natasha had to pause a couple of times because of her head. Yoyo would look on in concern but didn't say anything until they got back to the jet where she was sure they'd be safe. Upon reaching the jet, they were greeted by Fitz and Simmons who looked quite perplexed to see them back so soon. Jemma Simmons and Leopold Fitz are their team's doctors for the mission. Yoyo ignored their questioning looks first though and led Natasha over somewhere to sit.

"Agent Romanoff? Natasha?" Yoyo spoke quietly as she crouched down in front of Nat, who was currently basically hunched over in her seat, holding her head in her hands. "Can you tell me what's wrong?"

When they take in agents early from their missions due to presumed injuries or complications, it was standard of course to check them over and tend to them, especially if they were little. Right now however as she was crouching down in front of Natasha, trying to look at the spy's face, Yoyo couldn't help but feel a little more concerned.

Bigs have always been, for some reason, so protective of Natasha even though Black Widow scared them. None of them really knew why though. They tried to rationalize it as just maybe the natural tendency to be protective over littles, but part of them knew that wasn't it. They had a lot of little colleagues, but they never felt this way towards other littles when they're aged like they do with Nat. Regardless, agents tried not to dwell on it too much because Natasha wasn't quite fond of the attention anyway. They'd probably get the urge to hug or coddle Natasha for some reason, but just one mean look from Nat and all that instantly goes away.

Right now though, Natasha wasn't serving Yoyo any death glares which in theory, should be a good sign. With Nat though, this concerned Yoyo more. "Natasha, we can't help if we don't know what's wrong. Is it a headache?" Yoyo asked once more.

"I'm fine. I probably just need to sit down for a bit." Natasha mumbled, her eyes still tightly shut. She was alternating now between waves of nausea and intense pain.

"You don't look fine." Yoyo said with a shake of her head as she reached up to feel Natasha's forehead. "Fitz, Jemma, can either of you do a quick scan?" Yoyo asked as she turned her head to look at their two teammates.

"I don't need a scan." Natasha insisted and sighed but even then, Jemma was already walking towards the pair.

"It'll be a quick scan, agent Romanoff." Jemma said as she stood to Yoyo's left and tapped away on her tablet. "You won't even feel a thing, we can count to three and it'll aaaall be over." Jemma explained in a soothing voice like how she usually would to their little colleagues when dropped, but she didn't mean to. She'd been told Natasha doesn't appreciate that kind of treatment--and Nat wasn't even dropped. Jemma seemed to have realized her mistake because she tensed up and looked at Yoyo for help.

Before Yoyo could say anything though, Natasha just shook her head and stood up on shaky legs. Jemma instinctively reached out to steady her, but Natasha just brushed her off. "I'm fine. I'll just go sleep this off." She muttered before staggering away.

"It's okay, just let her be." Yoyo said softly in response to Jemma's concerned look. She sighed softly as she stood and turned her head to look at Natasha making her way to the bunks. "Let her cool down, we'll check on her in a bit."

"What even happened?" Fitz asked, finally stepping in once Natasha was out.

"I honestly don't know," Yoyo frowned. "I think she turned off her comms at one point and cap went to check on her. I was just nearby so I decided to see if I could help and when I got there, he just asked me to bring her back here."

"Did she get hurt or something?" Fitz asked.

"I didn't see any physical injuries though." Jemma said with a frown as she tapped away on her tablet.

"Well agent Romanoff's known for hiding her injuries well." Fitz pointed out, which was true. Nat would often skip trips to the med bay even for the worst of injuries because she just absolutely hated hospitals.

"No, I don't think she's hiding any physical injuries this time." Jemma shook her head, and Yoyo looked at her curiously as Jemma was still tapping and scrolling away. "I managed to do a quick scan while she sat there, but it's not a complete one."

Yoyo moved closer to Jemma so she can look at the tablet's screen. "What does it say?"

"No physical injuries, at least none that the system deems to be an urgent threat to her." Jemma said, but that didn't really ease Yoyo's worries about the agent. "I didn't get to finish other internal scans, but the system had a start on a quick brain scan." Jemma said, pausing for a bit as she looked at the results. "According to these results, there seems to be some chemical imbalance in her brain."

"That must be from her avoiding drops, right?" Fitz suggested.

"Likely, but if that's the case then this should be more cause for worry." Jemma frowned at them.

"What do you mean?" Yoyo asked, not liking the sound of this.

"Given the period that agent Romanoff's been avoiding her drops, the chemical imbalance should be tremendous." Jemma pointed out. She and a few other scientists back at SHIELD were given the task of trying to understand the science behind Natasha's (lack of) drops. Of course it wasn't easy because they relied on information they got from the med bay on the off-chance Nat would drop by after a mission. "I say should, because it's also quite odd. The few previous scans we have of her showed no imbalance at all."

"So it must be something else then?" Fitz asked.

"Maybe, I can't really know for sure." Jemma said with a sigh as she put the tablet away for the meantime. "It can be caused by a plethora of things given the lack of information I have right now."

"We can check on her later and you can try to get a more thorough scan." Yoyo said reassuringly. "Right now, let's check on the team and see if there's anything we can do from here." Yoyo of course decided she would be staying back in the jet. She was sure the rest of their team would've already advanced on the mission and her re-entering would just cause chaos. Plus, she felt the captain would appreciate it more if she stayed behind to make sure agent Romanoff would be okay. With that, the trio went to the jet's command center to get updates on the status of their mission.

About half an hour later and once they were certain that the mission was going smoothly, Yoyo brought up the subject of Natasha again. "I think we should go check on her."

"Agreed." Jemma said with a nod of her head. She'd been wanting to check on Natasha for quite some time now, but just didn't know if they should already or not.

"I'll stay behind so we don't overwhelm her." Fitz said as he stayed in his seat and Jemma retrieved her tablet. The two women agreed and once Jemma was ready with her things, she and Yoyo went for the bunks.

Upon reaching the bunks, Yoyo knocked before letting herself and Jemma inside. "Agent Romanoff?" Yoyo called out as she looked around. "Agent Romanoff, Simmons just wants to do one quick scan to make sure everything's fine." She frowned slightly when she couldn't see Natasha right away, so she went in deeper and looked through all the beds.

"I swear, it'll only take a moment and then we'll be out of your hair." Jemma said, making a conscious effort this time to not sound so... Soothing? Unlike Yoyo, she was just standing by the doorway currently tapping away on her tablet. She wanted to double check all the tests she'd set up so they could really make quick work of this.

"Jemma." Yoyo called the girl's attention, but Jemma didn't look up.

"Yes?" Jemma asked, still looking down at her screen.

"Natasha's not here." And at that, Yoyo effectively caught her attention and Jemma looked up to see all empty bunk beds around them.


	3. Chapter 3

When Natasha got to the bunks, she practically crashed down the bed closest to the door. She was in much more pain than she had let on: So much that she was actually starting to tear up. A wide range of emotions were hitting her now but what dominated was frustration. Being around the team right now, around Bigs, was extremely difficult.  
It just made her urge to drop even worse: Just the walk back to the jet with Yoyo was difficult for Natasha to handle. But she wasn't going to succumb to the drop, not when she was so close to fixing all of this again.

That's right! She almost had this under control, just one more night...   
The memory of her quest to seek a "remedy" for her drops was apparently enough to get Natasha going. Her bike was just in the loading hatch of their quinjet. She can easily sneak out and ride back to the compound. That probably wasn't a smart idea given the state she was in, but Natasha didn't want to risk staying here.

She didn't miss how concerned everyone looked about her. Normally that would annoy Natasha--it did annoy her currently, but not because she didn't want the attention. She was annoyed because, she would never admit it out loud, but she found herself actually liking it. Having the bigs look over her, the way agent Simmons spoke to try and calm her down...

Natasha shook her head at the thought, wincing because that did not help her headache at all. She sighed as she gingerly sat up and tried to get her bearings straight. She can do this. It took her a while but she eventually made it to her feet and soon, she was navigating her way to the loading hatch. The others luckily still seemed to be busy so Natasha eventually made it to her bike undetected. She'd been on this jet countless times already so it wasn't much of a challenge for her to open the hatch by herself.

As she climbed onto her bike she hesitated for a brief moment. Going off without any notice whatsoever would not only break protocol, but would also worry her team. Natasha contemplated going back, but only for a moment because she was hit once more with another wave of pain in her head. Before she could rethink her decision once more, Natasha started her bike and sped off.

The farther Natasha got from the quinjet, the more in control she started to feel again. The scents the Bigs were giving off were long gone which greatly helped in her control. Bigs naturally gave off this scent that often calmed Littles when they're in any form of distress.  
All bigs could have this calming effect on any little but generally, heartmates would be the most effective in calming one another. Not that Natasha would know, however.

_Little Natalia was in the middle of her class' sparring lesson when it happened again. Natalia and all the other students in her class were currently eight years old, which meant first drops have become a regular occurrence. It started with Annika 2 years ago when they were all 6. Turns out the girl was their class' youngest known little being dropped to the age of 5. Before Annika's drop, she and Natalia would actually spend what little free time they had playing with one another. But since then, Annika seemed to never have any free time._

_It was only 2 weeks later when Natalia and the rest of the girls discovered the truth. Annika had been the guinea pig, the guinea pig to the Red Room's pilot training courses for littles who were dropped. Black Widows had to be prepared 24/7, and being dropped was no excuse._

_"You all must be wondering why you're gathered here so late." Madame B addressed the little girls. It was the middle of the night, 2AM to be exact and everyone in Natalia's batch had been pulled from their beds for an urgent session, as one of the trainers put. They were currently in one of the big lecture halls, each student occupying their designated seat. A few of the girls were blinking tiredly as they looked at Madame B, but they all knew better than to show any form of tiredness beyond that._

_"As we have told you countless of times in your training sessions, preparation is key." Madame B went on. None of the girls spoke because they already knew by then that no response was desired unless stated explicitly so. "  
You have to be prepared for anything to happen at any time. Get caught off guard and all your training would have been for nothing." As if to demonstrate her point, she slammed a book down onto one of the girl's desks at the end of her sentence, causing the young girl to visibly flinch. This of course, did not amuse Madame B at all. If anything, Madame B looked unimpressed._

_"Do you flinch away from your attacker?" Madame B looked at the aforementioned girl. Natalia looked over and recognized the girl as Yelena. She'd only talked with Yelena 2 or 3 times in their entire stay, but Natalia thought she was nice. She was one of the toughest in their class but right now, Yelena didn't look the part.  
The little girl's eyes were wide as they looked up at Madame B. Her mouth kept opening and closing, as if she was still trying to determine if this was one of those times that they were expected to answer, or if it was just another rhetorical question._

_Natalia knew though. She'd always been more intuitive than the others. At such a young age, Natalia was learning to pick up on cues to determine how she should act. The Red Room was tough, but she'd told herself she was tougher. She might have been the smallest in her class, but their trainers praised Natalia for always being at the top of her game._

_Looking at Yelena now, Natalia knew the former didn't know what to say or do. "No, Madame B." Little Natalia spoke up, trying her best not to sound so tired even though all the little girl wanted to do now was sleep. That had caught the older woman's attention._

_"Then what do you do, Ms. Romanov?" Madame B asked, shifting her attention to the smaller girl now. Natalia looked at Yelena and the latter seemed both grateful and relieved that the attention was off her._

_"We fight to kill." Natalia said without missing a beat._

_"Exactly." Madame B nodded her head at Natalia before looking at the rest of their class. "And do you ladies know what happens when you don't? When you're caught off guard and forget what you need to do?" Natalia knew that this time Madame B wouldn't appreciate a response, so she just stayed quiet and the other girls seemed to be following her lead._

_Madame B studied all their faces before turning and walking towards the front of the room. It was only then Natalia noticed that the desk in front was draped with a white sheet, and something seemed to be underneath it. Madame B had this odd look on her face as she looked down at the table, as if she was both pleased with and disappointed at what lay underneath the sheet. She looked at the girls one more time before reaching for a corner of the sheet and unceremoniously pulling it off, revealing a little girl lying motionless on top of the table._

_"Your classmate here decided to serve as a reminder to you all, why your training should be taken seriously." Madame B addressed the room, and she continued on talking about their chances of survival, about the realities of their drops. But Natalia wasn't paying attention to any of it, not anymore.  
There was no mistaking it, the little girl lying motionless on the table was no other than Annika. Natalia had seen dead bodies before, all of them had. But this was different. All the deaths they've witnessed in the past were of much older men and women, and evil ones at that. Annika was their friend. Annika was her friend._

_Madame B droned on about Annika's death. She explained how she died while dropped because the little seemed to have been more interested in play than her training. She didn't leave out any details regardless of how horrendous the story was. She even pulled up the security footage to show the class that she was in fact, not making any of this up. The group of 6 year old girls stared helplessly at the screen in front of them as Annika was beaten to a pulp. That image never left Natalia's mind._

_That was 2 years ago, and now those memories came flooding back as she stared helplessly at Yelena. They were in the middle of their sparring lesson when Yelena started giggling and running around out of nowhere. But Natalia knew what this meant. Girls in their class had been experiencing their first drops left and right these past few months._

_They'd been dropping from the program as often too. And no, it wasn't because the girls were allowed to leave and go back to their homes. No one just seemed to be capable of accomplishing the extra curriculum set for dropped littles. At first, the alarming disappearance rate scared the little girls. No one wanted to be the next, because the next never came back. But the supervisors immediately picked up on this and found new ways to... Encourage the little girls to drop._

_Natalia wasn't swayed though. No matter how ruthless their regular training sessions were, she knew what lies beyond was much worse. She and Yelena had been staying strong: They'd made a pact to look out for each other, to not let one another drop. But now, looking at Yelena's happy features as she ran giggling away from their trainers, Natalia knew she failed._

"Agent Romanoff? Agent Romanoff!" Natasha had been so deep in thought that she hadn't even realized she'd reached the compound's gates by now. "You're not due back for another day." The guard continued once he was satisfied that he got the agent's attention.

"Yeah well change of plans. Are you going to let me in?" Natasha asked with a quirked eyebrow, even though it really was more of a demand than anything else.

Despite being Little, Natasha was still feared by many in SHIELD and luckily, this guard felt this same fear as well. Nat could tell the guard was a Little because she knew the Big guards would probably be able to sense her distress. There was still an ache in her head that now managed to reach the back of her neck, but she was doing her best to not let it show. And it seemed to work, because the guard just promptly nodded his head and opened the gates. Soon, Natasha was driving her bike into the garage and parking it in its usual spot.

On her way back to her floor she got a lot of questioning looks, but even more concerned ones particularly from Bigs. But she ignored everyone and made a beeline for her floor. The more senior agents like her (not to mention, an Avenger) had their own little apartments in the compound. Standard issue would have one bedroom, one bathroom, a living room, and a kitchen with a dining area. Depending on their needs though, these could be altered. Littles for example, would often request an additional room where they could keep their Little things. Natasha didn't particularly need anything special in terms of her Little status, but she did request an additional room. Given her contributions to the agency, no one could really deny her.

So that was where she went upon reaching her apartment. Her extra room was a little smaller than her bedroom, but it was stocked with some computers, screens, and quite a few lab equipment. Maria Hill first questioned her intentions, but eventually let it go because she felt she could trust Romanoff not to burn the compound down. Sure, she was no Bruce Banner but Natasha had plenty of skills up her sleeves.

When she saw her little lab, it was as if she had renewed hope. Natasha stood up a little straighter and walked over to the cupboards, from which she retrieved a little glass bottle.

_"I don't need drops." Natalia said in a deadpan tone as she looked straight at Madame B. She and the older woman were currently in the latter's office, with Natalia sitting on the chair on the opposite side of Madame B's desk. It was a little after lunch and Natalia had been pulled out of their shooting lessons for what was framed as an urgent matter. Said matter apparently was her Little status. "I've been performing well without them. I'm at the top of my class--."_

_"I don't contest that matter, Miss Romanov." Madame B cut in, effectively shushing the younger girl. "You have always been the top of your class from the very beginning. But the other trainers have brought to my attention that you seem to be a bit more distracted recently."_   
_Natalia knew this day would come. She'd been having headaches more frequently for the past few months, years? She couldn't remember anymore. And the pain just intensified as time progressed. She thought she was doing well in ignoring it, in hiding this, but apparently not._

_Ever since that fateful day 6 years ago when Yelena dropped, Natalia was more determined not to. At first, she considered dropping too just so Yelena would have company. But she knew that wasn't what Yelena would want her to do, so she stood firm. Now, despite being 14, Natalia felt she was that little girl once more. Granted she still looked like a 10 year old, but that wasn't the point. She felt like a deer caught in headlights._

_"I was just trying to give the others a chance." Really, Natalia? She had to fight hard not to wince at her own defense._

_"Really? A chance at what?" Madame B asked with an eyebrow quirked. Natalia knew she wasn't buying it._

_"To survive." Natalia said, and at that Madame B shook her head._

_"I'm disappointed in you Miss Romanov. You need more practice in interrogation." Madame B said as she flipped through her notes. "Luckily, as mentioned you're the best in your class. Perhaps one of the best in the program's history. Otherwise, well..." she trailed off, letting Natalia's imagination conjure up possibilities of how they'd make her life a living hell._

_"You know, there's no point in you lying." Madame B continued. "We've known for quite a while now that you've been withholding your drops--don't look so surprised now."_

_"But if you've known all this time..."_

_"Why didn't we call you out? Force you to drop?" Madame B offered. "Well quite honestly, we were curious as to how long you could last. We're quite impressed you lasted this long, actually." That frustrated Natalia, of course by avoiding one of the Red Room's experiments, she unknowingly plunged herself into another one._

_"Miss Romanov, I don't want to waste any more of our time so let me cut to the chase." Madame B said, and Natalia looked her straight in the eyes. "I know you have no intentions of dropping so as to avoid the... Extra curriculum. But I also know you won't be able to continue doing this on your own, so let me propose you a deal." At that, Madame B opened one of her desk drawers and produced a little bottle which she placed down in front of both of them._

_"Are you not going to ask me what this is?"_

_"You're going to tell me regardless if I ask or not." Natalia found herself saying, but luckily Madame B somehow just found that amusing._

_"Ever the snappy one." Madame B said. "This bottle contains pills that our lab has been developing for a few years now. They're meant to prevent drops and fight the side effects of doing so. I see that caught your attention." She smiled. Usually Natalia was good at schooling her expression, but again, the headache she'd been experiencing was not doing her wonders. "We've only ever allowed a handful of our students to take these and now, you're part of that very short list."_

_"What's the catch?" Natalia asked with her eyebrows furrowed._

_"Stay at the top of your class. The moment you drop a rank, we cut your supply." Madame B responded promptly, having already anticipated that question._

_"I don't believe you." Natalia said, her eyes never leaving Madame B's face._

_Surprisingly, that didn't tick Madame B off at all. "And I'm glad you don't. If you trust too easily then that won't get you very far." Madame B said calmly which annoyed Natalia. "But Miss Romanov, it's either this, or you drop. But given the success rates of our other curriculum right now... I believe this is what you'd prefer. Unless of course, you want to suffer the same fate as your little friend. Yelena, was it?"_

As much as Nat wanted to say that she was strong, she defied Madame B, pulled a surprising maneuver--anything, she didn't. It didn't take long to convince Nat to agree to the pills and she'd been taking them ever since. She didn't take them as prescribed. As much as possible, she didn't want to rely too much on the pills, only taking them when the pain became incredibly unbearable.

This proved handy because at least even years after leaving the Red Room, she still had a sizeable supply for a few years. Of course, her stock was limited and now, the bottle in her hand contained the very last original pill. She'd been saving it for months now, telling herself she wouldn't take it until she successfully replicated a batch.  
Yes, that's right: Natasha was trying to replicate the pills. That's why she'd asked SHIELD for this room.

In theory, she could have asked for Bruce's help. If she had, she'd probably have several batches ready by now. But she had a feeling this was something she needed to keep under wraps. Alone, it might have taken her a while but she was already so close.

She looked at the bottle in her hand and determined if she should just take the pill already: But she had to be cautious. If her first batch failed, there would be no turning back. There'd be no original pill left to study. Sighing, she put the bottle on top of the table first and went to the cooler to check on her first batch. If her calculations were correct, they should be ready by tonight.


	4. Chapter 4

"Just give me a moment, will you?" Fitz said a bit tensely. He, Jemma, and Yoyo regrouped once the two girls discovered that Natasha was no longer with them on the jet. Now they were currently trying to track Natasha's location using her bike's GPS.

"I can't believe she just took off like that." Jemma said softly, though it probably wasn't uncharacteristic of agent Romanoff, if you think about it.

"I can't believe you didn't let me go after her." Yoyo quipped. When they discovered Nat's bike gone, Yoyo wanted nothing more than to go after her fellow agent, but Jemma and Fitz were quick to stop her. If Natasha wanted to get away from them, there was no stopping her or getting her to come back.

"You think Captain Rogers would be all too pleased that we have two missing agents?" Jemma argued, and Yoyo looked at her as if she grew a second head.

"You think he'll be pleased when he learns agent Romanoff left and we didn't go after her?" Yoyo countered. Everyone knew Steve was a bit more protective over Natasha for some reason. Everyone knew, except Natasha. Or so she played it off like she wasn't noticing.

"She's fully capable of handling herself, you and I both know that." Jemma said as she straightened up a bit.

"Guys--"

"She's a _Little_ , Simmons." Yoyo cut Fitz off, neither of the girls seeming to have heard him anyway. Both were too caught up in trying to prove their own point. " An injured Little for all we know. Who knows if she's even capable of driving her own bike right now?!"

"Guys--"

Cut off yet again this time by Jemma. "I like to believe that agent Romanoff would be smart enough not to drive if she felt like she wasn't capable. If you went after her that could just spell even bigger trouble for all of us." That was true. Agent Romanoff was at a much higher clearance level than all of them which, funny enough meant she could probably get away for a stunt like this more easily than they can. Well that, and Natasha was an Avenger after all.

"Guys--"

"You know very well agent Romanoff can be stubbo--" and it was Fitz's turn to cut Yoyo off.

"Would you guys shut up for one second?!" Fitz exclaimed, effectively getting Jemma's and Yoyo's attention. "Thank you." He sighed when he saw that the two had in fact, quit their bickering. Finally. He shook his head to himself and tapped something on his tablet, causing a map to flash on the bigger screen in front of them. "If I'm reading this right, it looks like she's heading back towards the city." Fitz said as he pointed out the blinking yellow dot that was currently moving across the map.

Yoyo looked at the screen and for a moment, she looked a little relieved. Until Jemma spoke up again. "It's yellow." She pointed out the obvious, but she looked a little troubled.

"It is." Fitz mumbled his agreement as he looked down at his tablet, tapping away once more. "But I don't see any immediate cause for concern."

"What's all this supposed to mean?" Yoyo asked with furrowed eyebrows, and Jemma and Fitz shared a look. It was Jemma who answered her question.

"Well, for mine and Fitz's thesis in our first year, we developed this biotech that let us track the person's vitals. It's quite simple, really. The technology's weaved into--"

"I meant, what does the yellow dot mean?" Yoyo cut Jemma off before the girl could ramble on about their creation. Though the fact that the tech was meant to track people's vitals, and that the dot was currently yellow did not seem to bode well.

It was Fitz this time who responded. "Simply put, it means she's not in a particularly good state but it isn't alarming either. I'm looking at a more detailed report here and it seems that she should be fine. If anything, agent Romanoff has heightened stress levels but as far as our tech can tell, that's pretty much it."

"And how intensive exactly are these tests?" Yoyo asked, sounding a bit skeptical which of course Fitz easily picked up on because the man looked slightly offended. As if Yoyo had just questioned the capabilities of his child or something. Luckily though, Fitz was trying to keep a level head for all of them because he knew Jemma and Yoyo were already both frustrated as is.

"As intensive as they can get, agent Rodriguez." Fitz said simply. "Look, there's not much we can do from here. The tech's just meant to gather data and she's already too far off for us to go after. I'll alert Coulson just in case anything happens, and I'll keep an eye on her vitals and location." Fitz said reassuringly. Yoyo sighed, knowing Fitz was right but that didn't mean that she was happy about it.

"Fine. Just update me on any significant changes in her vitals, or if she goes off route." Yoyo said before turning on her comms and shifting her attention instead to the monitors that revealed her other teammates' locations. They still had a mission ongoing, so the least she could do was to see it through from the benches. Plus, she felt like she needed a distraction, otherwise she probably would take off after Natasha soon.

In the next couple of hours, Fitz and Jemma took turns in monitoring Natasha while Yoyo observed the mission, occasionally giving the team intel on the whereabouts of their enemies. Just as Natasha safely reached the compound, much to the three's relief, Steve and the rest of their team were on their way back to the quinjet. The three of them barely had any time to discuss how to break the news to Steve before the captain himself joined them.

"Hey, things turned out to be a lot easier than we anticipated." Steve said casually as he put away his shield. Steve looked a little tired but otherwise, he seemed to be doing fine. "How's Natasha?" Steve asked, looking first at Yoyo then at Fitz and Jemma. The trio took note that Steve said Natasha and not agent Romanoff, which of course meant that Steve was asking as Nat's friend or as a Big, not their team leader. But of course he was: Natasha was much more to him than his teammate. If he hadn't been the only high level agent out on the field to be left earlier, he would have probably taken Natasha back himself.

When he didn't get an immediate response, he frowned slightly in concern and decided to just change his question. "Where's Nat?" Steve watched as Yoyo exchanged concerned looks with Fitz and Jemma before she spoke up.

"She's... Back in the compound, captain." Yoyo said, and Steve can see all three of them suddenly tense up. He did too.

"I'm sorry, did you just say she's back in the compound?" Steve asked, his forehead scrunching up in confusion. He wasn't sure he heard Yoyo right. He hoped he didn't.

"Agent Romanoff left a couple of hours ago, sir. We've been tracking her location and vitals ever since." Fitz offered before nodding to the screen, which displayed Natasha's current location and her vitals.

"Did no one think of going after her?" Steve asked, trying incredibly hard to stay calm. Natasha had left not feeling well, and these three just let her go? Avenger or not, Natasha was part of their team, an unwell Little part of their team at that.

Yoyo looked like he was about to say something, and Jemma seemed as if she was pleading her to keep quiet. Before Yoyo could speak up though, Skye--or rather Daisy as she likes to be called when Little, came running in.

"Auntie Jemma!" Daisy exclaimed as she basically made a run for the scientist. The agent seemed to have dropped some time along the way back to the quinjet. Despite the situation, Steve found himself smiling even just a little at the sight. Like other Bigs, he always had a soft spot for Littles. Daisy was one of the youngest Littles he knew and found her absolutely endearing.

"Hi Daisy!" Jemma said with as much enthusiasm as she smiled and crouched down, opening her arms up for the Little to run into, which Daisy did. "How are you feeling, sweetheart?" Jemma asked sweetly as she wrapped her arms around the Little. "It looks like you've got a little owie there, huh?" Jemma said gently as she looked at the small cut above Daisy's left eyebrow.

"Uhhuh, but I didn't cry 'cause I'm a big girl." Daisy said, sounding a bit proud of herself. "Are you gonna tell mommy I was brave and am a big girl?" She asked with wide eyes. Steve couldn't not smile at that as she watched the exchange.

"Mhm, you bet we're telling your mommy how brave you are. And how well-behaved you will be while I clean that up, yeah?" Jemma asked with a gentle smile, but Daisy pouted in response.

"But auntie Jemmaaa..." Daisy whined, and Jemma chuckled as she stood back up before taking Daisy's hand.

"Come on sweetheart. After we get that cleaned up we can read a story, how about that?" Jemma suggested as she led Daisy away. Steve pretended not to notice that Jemma looked relieved to have a valid reason to leave their previous conversation. Daisy of course looked pleased with that suggestion, so the Little didn't fuss anymore as she was led away.

Once the pair had left, Steve turned his attention back to Yoyo and Fitz who did not look all-too pleased to be abandoned by Jemma. "We thought of going after her but we felt that wouldn't have gone well." Yoyo said, and Fitz looked surprised, as if he hadn't anticipated that to be Yoyo's response. "Almost as soon as we got back here she already separated herself form us. She wanted space, sir."

"And we've been keeping a close eye on her vitals, informed Coulson as well of the situation on the off-chance that things would get out of hand." Fitz added. "Based on my readings it seems that agent Romanoff just has a terrible headache, sir. It wasn't anything too serious." 

Steve sighed and closed his eyes for a moment to calm himself down. He knew the agents meant well, but it didn't change the fact that he was concerned about Natasha's well-being. "Alright. Let's just head back already." Steve said after a while. "Wheels up in 3, tell the pilot." He said before leaving the room to go to the bunks for privacy, intent on trying to contact Natasha.

And he did, or so he tried. Every call he made just went straight for Natasha's voice mail, be it on her landline or her mobile. Steve was starting to get agitated because yes, he knew Natasha made it back to the compound. But he didn't know if Natasha needed any medical attention. Natasha was an adult, sure: An adult who didn't particularly like going to the medbay unless she was on the brink of death. Agent Fitz had told him that Natasha may just be experiencing a headache, but something told Steve it was much more than that.

They were already on the way back to the compound, but they were hours away. Anything could happen to Natasha in that span of time, so Steve picked up his phone and called the person he knew he could trust and count on.

"Hey Cap, mission go well?" Tony asked as soon as he picked up Steve's call, and the latter couldn't help but smile a little upon hearing Tony's voice.

"Yeah, yeah it was fine." Steve said as he leaned forward and rested one of his elbows on his thigh, his other hand holding his phone to his ear. "It's just, are you by any chance at the compound?" Tony didn't stay over as often, but Steve hoped that tonight was one of those nights.

But the world didn't seem to be on his side tonight. "No, I'm back at my place. Why, what's up?" Tony replied. "And Cap, you are aware that it's 2 in the morning, right?"

"Mhm and you should be asleep, but you aren't." Steve pointed out, earning a soft chuckle from Tony on the other end.

"Yeah well I had to stay up, make sure that when you need a little virtual hand-holding after your mission I'm here." Tony teased, making Steve blush a little but he smiled nonetheless. The two of them weren't necessarily dating. Both of them felt this attraction towards one another and have been flirting for quite some time. They didn't really do much beyond that though, and it was driving the rest of the Avengers nuts.  
"What's wrong?" Tony asked when Steve still hadn't answered his question.

"It's Natasha." Steve said with a sigh. "She... Went off mission."

"Natasha always goes off mission." Steve could practically hear Tony rolling his eyes. "For all we know Fury might have given her another side mission or something." Steve could hear beeping, metals clanking, and an engine revving on the other end so he figured Tony was probably working in his shed.

"No, I mean she left the mission, Tony. And she was unwell." Steve explained. "I checked on her in the field because she turned off her comms and I see her out of it."

"What do you mean out of it?" Tony asked. Tony, like almost everyone else, knew how protective Steve was of Natasha. So by extension, Tony was growing a little protective of her as well.

"I don't know, she was distracted. But not by her thoughts or something. She was in pain so I had her brought back to the quinjet--"

"I bet she didn't appreciate that." Tony commented,

"--where agents Fitz and Simmons did some tests or something. They said Natasha was just experiencing some headache but by the time we got back after the mission, she was already gone." Steve continued.

"Well, if little miss encyclopedia and budget Einstein say it's just a headache I think I'd trust them." Tony said.

"You really need to stop calling them that, Tony." Steve said with an amused shake of his head. "I know how capable they are but my gut says it's more than that. You and I have seen Natasha with a simple headache, and she practically just brushes it off."

"So you're telling me all this because... You were hoping that I could check on her?" Tony clarified, to which Steve nodded his head before he realized Tony couldn't see him.

"Yeah if you were at the compound, but..." Steve sighed. "Sorry, I didn't mean to bother you so late for this."

"Hey, you don't have to apologize, it's fine." Tony insisted. "I can't really check on Nat right now, but I think Clint should be at the compound. I can ask him to quickly check on her if you want."

"That depends. Is your Little going to murder me for disrupting his sleep?" Steve asked with a humorless chuckle.

"You and I both know he'd be more upset if something was potentially wrong with Nat and we didn't let him in." Tony pointed out, and Steve knew he was right.

"Alright, okay. If it won't be too much." Steve said softly. Clint was probably the closest friend Natasha had, so he was banking that Natasha would let him know if anything was up.

"I'll call Clint and get back to you when he gives me any updates." Tony said reassuringly.

"Thanks Tony, I appreciate it. Really." Steve said as sincerely as he could and he let out a breath of relief.

"No biggie. She'll be fine, Steve." Tony said. "And hey, you take it easy, okay? You just finished a mission and aren't due back for a couple of hours. There's not much you can do about the situation from there, so why don't you close your eyes for a moment, yeah? Again, I'll just call you when I get updates."

As much as Steve wanted to argue against that because he wanted to be up in case anything happened, he knew Tony was right. "Yeah, okay. Thanks again, Tony." After exchanging goodbyes with Tony, Steve finally hung up and kept his phone close by. If Tony believed that Steve would be taking a rest while waiting, he was wrong. His mind just kept racing about Natasha and he was getting restless.

Even when Tony called around an hour later to tell him that Natasha seemed to be fine, he still couldn't sit still.

*

Back in her bedroom at the compound, Natasha had fallen asleep again. "Again", because a few hours ago she'd woken up to FRIDAY informing her that Clint was at the door. She refused to let him in at first, but then he threatened to just ruin all her vents and he wouldn't quit bugging her, so she conceded. It took a lot of convincing from Natasha (and basically her flipping Clint over her shoulder out of annoyance) before Clint finally believed that she was feeling okay and left her alone.

Of course she was doing okay, as she'd finally taken her pill. After checking and rechecking her first batch of replicas, Natasha deemed it finally a success which was quite a relief. They just all needed to set but otherwise, they were good to go. So taking confidence in her capabilities, Natasha took the last original pill and almost immediately, she was filled with relief.

But when her alarm went off again for that second time tonight, alerting her to someone else at her door, she swore she was going to get an even worse headache. "FRIDAY, I said no more intruders." Natasha muttered as she grabbed a pillow and put it over her head, in a futile attempt to block out the noise.

"Yes Ms. Romanoff, but he insists on seeing you immediately." FRIDAY said.

"Tell Barton to go away unless he wants me to kick his ass again." Natasha grumbled.

"It's Captain Rogers, Ms. Romanoff." FRIDAY informed her, and at that Natasha furrowed her eyebrows together in confusion. "He says he's aware that you might kick his ass, but he insists he isn't leaving until he sees you."

Now Natasha was as stubborn as a stubborn Little can get. She could have just muted FRIDAY because she knew Steve wouldn't do anything crazy anyway. But this was Steve. As much as it annoyed her sometimes when she felt Steve was a little overbearing, he was actually one of the people Natasha liked the most. She liked it when she did something that made Steve smile, or something that'd earn her even the smallest of praises from him.

And more than that, she hated it when Steve got upset or worried.

So after a couple more moments of contemplation, she sighed and hesitantly pulled herself out of bed and made her way to her front door. When she opened it, sure enough Steve was there, looking just about ready to knock again. "Shouldn't you be in debriefing?" Natasha asked as she looked up at him.

"I wanted to check on you." There it was, that same warm feeling she got whenever Steve showed her any concern. Now that her head wasn't hurting that was all her emotions were focusing on. "Can I come in?" Nat wanted to say yes, but for once her stubbornness won over.

"It's late, Steve. I was sleeping, and if you're not heading to debrief you should be heading to bed too." Natasha said, not moving aside from her place in the middle of the doorway.

"How's your head?" Steve asked instead. She was waiting for him to berate her about leaving the mission, but it didn't seem like that was coming. She looked up at Steve again and could see the genuine concern in his eyes.

"Better." Nat said truthfully. "I think I just had a terrible migraine. I'm sorry about leaving." Nat said, beating Steve to it but he just shook his head.

"It's fine, I should know by now that I can trust you to know how to take care of yourself." He said with the smallest of smiles. That should've made Natasha happy or proud... But for some reason, she felt a bit disappointed? "You've always been more independent than the others." Really, that was it? No sermon on how she jeopardized the mission?

"Well if I'm so independent then why did you feel the need to check on me?" Natasha asked with an eyebrow quirked. The words left her mouth before she could stop herself. Luckily Steve just chuckled softly and shook his head in amusement.

"I guess it was for my own peace of mind, then." Steve said, but Natasha could tell that he wasn't telling the complete truth. He could see Steve's eyes wandering her face, as if looking for any signs of her lying. But Natasha was much more trained at this than Steve was and she could easily school her expressions.

Natasha pursed her lips together and nodded her head. "As you can see, I'm doing fine. I told you, it was just a migraine. That enough peace for your mind?" She said with the smallest of smiles. Natasha could see a little hesitation in Steve's features, as if he didn't believe her. But if he didn't, he also didn't say anything about it.

"Enough peace for now." Steve said with a nod and tight smile. "I should probably let you rest then. Wouldn't want you to get another headache."

Despite her earlier stubbornness, part of her didn't want Steve to leave. "Yeah, okay. Good night, cap."

"You sleep well." Steve said with a nod and smile. They bid each other goodbye and Natasha shut the door before heading back to her bedroom, strangely enough feeling a little emptier than she had before seeing Steve. Sadly, it was a familiar feeling for the Little. It was something that often overpowered her emotions whenever she pushed Steve away. She knows she wasn't attracted to Steve though, at least not in the same way that Tony was. She couldn't find any explanation for it so she just chalked it up to her Little side craving a Big's presence.

Never mind that she didn't feel this way towards other Bigs. All she knew was that if she'd think about the matter even more her head may explode. So like all the rest of the times that this happened, Natasha just pushed those feelings down and climbed back into her bed, falling asleep almost as soon as her head hit her pillow.

The next time she woke up it was already light out, and luckily it wasn't to FRIDAY alerting her of another unwanted visitor. Unluckily though, it was because her head was throbbing once more. This neither upset nor surprised Natasha though. Every few months or so, the headaches were much worse and frequent so she had to take more pills. This probably just was one of those months.

Knowing that her first batch of pills would probably be ready by now, Natasha hoisted herself up and out of bed, throwing her legs over the side. She sat there for a couple of moments as she got her bearings straight but soon, she was getting up and walking towards her makeshift lab. She went straight for her fridge, crouching down so she can reach better.

She pulled out her tray that contained the first batch and sighed in relief when she saw that they had in fact, settled. She grabbed one pill and popped it into her mouth, easily swallowing it dry before she stood and grabbed the bottle she reserved for the rest. Once she had it capped, Natasha stored the bottle in one of the cupboards before going out to her kitchen to make a quick breakfast.

Usually, she'd eat breakfast with the team. This hadn't always been the case, but a few months back Steve insisted that they had team breakfasts as much as possible. Something about building their relationships or whatever. No one bought it though and Nat had a strange suspicion that Steve suggested that so he can be sure she was eating right. She didn't call it out though because one, she didn't want to embarrass herself and make it look like she was assuming everything Steve did was for her (because really, it wasn't). And two, maybe part of her actually liked that routine. It gave her more reasons to be with Steve _without_ her having to initiate it. After yesterday's events though, she wasn't really up to seeing anyone.

Natasha already had a routine established for herself, which meant this morning would be a visit to the shooting range. No reason to break that routine just because of missing team breakfast, so she just grabbed a granola bar and started her coffee maker. Yeah, Natasha wasn't the healthiest of eaters but she got by with her diet, so it wasn't a cause of alarm for her. She was just halfway through her granola bar when she could feel her pill already taking effect. She smiled a little and gave her a mental pat on the back for it.

She thought back to yesterday's events and cringed a little. She still couldn't believe she ran off from a mission like that, but she just comforted herself by saying that it was a low-level one, and it turned out well, anyway. She wasn't particularly concerned about what the rest of her team thought about what he did. Well, that is except for Steve. Did Steve think she was going rogue or something? Did Steve actually buy her migraine story?

Who was she kidding, of course he didn't. Why he just let it go so easily though, she didn't understand. Was it because he didn't really care enough? That thought alone made Natasha's stomach feel like it was going in knots.

It was the coffee maker alerting her to the fresh batch of the juice of life that pulled her out of her thoughts. Natasha shook her head to herself and poured a cup of coffee, tossing her half-eaten granola bar into the bin before walking back to her bedroom, cup of coffee in hand. Yeap, not the best of diets. It was a mystery to all of them how Natasha stayed so fit despite her eating habits, but the last time they tried to call her out on it, well... Let's just say it made them not want to try again.

Once she'd downed her cup of coffee, Natasha pulled on her typical outfit and got ready for the day. She liked starting in the shooting range because apart from the sound of her gun firing, it was nice and quiet.

The range was often used for training sessions only in the afternoon, and agents with down time would rather spend their free time elsewhere. Caretakers would most likely sleep in, while Bigs and Littles with heartmates more often than not spend the free time with one another.

Not Natasha though.

Natasha kept telling her that she didn't want that, that she wasn't weak. She kept telling herself that until she believed it. She didn't think any less of her Little teammates though. Natasha knew they couldn't help themselves: They didn't have the same resources or training that she did. There was a time she seriously considered letting Clint in on her secret, primarily so she could offer him this solution to drops as well. But she figured it wasn't for everyone.

_"Nooo! Stop it Wanda! It's my turn!" Daisy whined. They were out in the park in the middle of the compound, just lounging around.  
Years ago, Hill and Fury decided to have this park developed so Bigs and Littles could have at least a breath of fresh air nearby during their down times. It was often filled with Littles running around and Bigs chatting with one another by the picnic tables. Today though, it was just most of the Avengers and their SHIELD team partners. _

_"Nuh-uh! It hasn't been five minutes yet. You gotta wait your turn." Wanda said as she continued to kick her legs and swing high. Most of them had come from a pretty bad mission the previous day, so they all decided to get together for a little family time._

_"You just don't wanna share!" Daisy said as she stomped her foot in frustration. Natasha was watching the potential disaster unfold from her spot on the picnic table. Daisy looked awfully close to tears._

_"You just don't know how to wait!" Wanda said in a somewhat teasing tone, that of course just upset Daisy even more._

_"Wanda be nice to your little sister." Sam said in a warning tone._

_"Uncle Sam Wanda's not playin' nice!" Daisy whined, and Wanda looked like she was about to retaliate but before that, Steve stepped in._

_"Come on Daisy, why don't you and I build the biggest sand castle there is, hm?" Steve said with a smile as he crouched down by the Little. Daisy frowned and she looked at Steve for a moment before glancing back at Wanda._

_"The biggest ever? Is it gonna have a place for the horsies to sleep?" Daisy asked._

_"Mhm, the horsies could even have their own little castle." Steve said with a nod. That seemed to interest Daisy more than the swings did, so the girl smiled at Steve and nodded her head. Meltdown and crisis averted. Seeing Steve play with their Little teammates stirred something within her. She felt all soft and lightheaded for some reason._

_"You know, for someone who wasn't part of the mission you look the most stressed out here." Clint said in an amused tone as he sat down next to Natasha._

_Natasha just rolled her eyes in good nature and shook her head. She was still watching Steve who'd just sat down in the big sandbox with Daisy. "Shouldn't you be dropped and playing right now?" She asked, to which Clint shrugged in response to._

_"I can drop later." He said. "What's on your mind?"_

_On a normal day, Nat would have shut Clint out; would have denied that there was anything bothering her. But seeing her team right now, gathered together with Bigs playing with the Littles... It was overwhelming her. "What's so great about dropping? I mean, you just turn into some little kid for a while and then what?" She asked with her eyebrows furrowed together._

_Steve and Daisy were filling some buckets now with sand and Steve kept pretending to miss, ending up dumping sand on top of Daisy's feet. Daisy found that hilarious and she was a giggling mess. Steve was a big, but he hasn't found his heartmate yet so for now, he was the cool uncle to plenty of Littles. "Well, it's more of an emotional thing." Clint responded after a while._

_"So that makes you think I'm not capable of understanding?" Natasha asked with an eyebrow quirked, turning her head to look at Clint. There was amusement in her voice though, which told Clint she at least wasn't really offended._

_"I didn't say that." Clint said, giving Natasha a look. "It's just something you really need to experience to understand." He continued._

_"I guess I'll never understand then." Natasha shrugged. That much, Natasha knew._

_"Why don't you want to understand?" Clint asked. He'd asked Natasha similar questions in the past but they've always been brushed off. He was probably hoping that now would be a different case._

_"What do you like most about dropping?" Natasha asked, trying to shift the focus of their conversation. Nat could practically feel the disappointment radiating from Clint, but other than that he showed no signs of displeasure at the sudden change. He probably expected it._

_"That's a tough question." Clint said, looking into the distance as he gave it some thought. "I guess it's that I can forget all about the horrors of the world for a while. Kids see the world a different way and it's nice to experience that kind of innocence again--even as a 12 year old." Clint chuckled.  
"Tony makes it pretty cool, too. He knows when I need coddling, but he knows when I need some independence. He just... Knows me, I guess. The emotional benefits you get from the heartmate connection really isn't a joke. No matter how cheesy it sounds, being around Tony makes things better even when I'm aged." Clint continued._

_"But I'm rambling now. I guess the short answer would be what I like most is how it makes all this more bearable. Whether dropped or not." Clint said before turning her head to look at Natasha._

_"What do you hate about it?" Natasha asked softly. She was still trying to take in what Clint had told her, but she needed him to keep on talking._

_"Oh that's easy. That Tony can punish me and put me in time out." Clint said with a roll of his eyes, and Natasha actually snorted and laughed at that. The sight of his best friend in the naughty corner definitely was amusing._

_"That's the worst you can think of?" Natasha asked in an amused tone as she looked up at Clint, and Clint shrugged._

_"Not much bad things I can say about it, if I'm being honest." Clint said easily._

_"So if you had the chance to take it away, to make your drops stop, you wouldn't take it?" Nat asked, and it was Clint's turn to furrow his eyebrows together._

_"No, not at all. The pros definitely outweigh the cons. And hey, I can run around and cause havoc with less consequences than I'd probably get when I'm aged. It's a pretty good deal to me." Clint grinned._

_"You're such a dork." Natasha said as she lightly bumped her shoulder with Clint's, making the latter chuckle._

_"Mhm, but you love me anyway." Clint said as he wrapped an arm around Natasha and pulled her close before kissing the top of her head. She'd normally push away the affection, but this was Clint so it was different: He wasn't a Big._

Natasha never understood Clint's logic, or maybe she just didn't try or want to understand. Nevertheless, she let the topic go and never brought it up with Clint ever since. If it makes Clint happy, then she wasn't ruining it for him. So once she'd gotten dressed and ready for the day, she pushed all those thoughts aside and just left her apartment for the shooting range. There would be no thoughts about dropping or not dropping from now on.

Much to her dismay though, upon reaching the range she discovered that it wasn't empty as usual. Agent Melinda May was there. It wasn't that she disliked May, she liked May quite a lot. But Natasha goes to the range expecting it to be empty. At least May was usually quiet and kept to herself anyway.

Still, Natasha just gave May a small smile and nodded her head in hello before going to her locker. She got her equipment on and took her usual spot, trying her best to tune everything out and just focus on the targets in front of her.

She lasted about ten minutes. As quiet as Melinda May was, her presence was also awfully... Eerie. And Natasha could practically feel May's eyes on the back of her neck.  
"What is it, agent May?" Natasha asked as she reloaded her gun. "If you need something, just say it."

For a moment, Natasha thought May was ignoring her. But a couple of seconds later, just before she was going to unload another round of bullets into her target, May was by her side. If Natasha hadn't been a spy, she would've been caught surprised because of how quiet May was.

"So what happened yesterday?" May asked as she leaned against the wall that divided the range they were at from the others. Nat was about to shoot, but she put her arms down and looked at May in confusion. "I heard you left the mission early." May clarified.

At that, Natasha huffed and raised her arms again, preparing to shoot. "Had a migraine, figured I was no use in the field that way so I left." She said before shooting the target right smack in the middle of its head.

"I've seen you endure things worse than migraines and you still went charging into battle." May pointed out, and Natasha knew she was right. "I'll ask you again, what happened?"

"What is this, an interrogation?" Natasha scoffed and shook her head before reloading her gun.

"It doesn't have to be if you cooperate."

"If I cooperate?" Natasha asked incredulously as she released another round of bullets. May let her finish before speaking up once more.

"Are you doing drugs?" She asked, absolutely no filters at all. Now Natasha's rarely taken aback during so-called interrogations, but this? The accusation was absolutely absurd and Natasha found herself laughing.

"Excuse me?" Natasha laughed as she turned and finally looked at May. She even put down her gun on the table because she felt she needed all her attention for this.

"You heard me." May said, her eyes narrowing just a little.

"I can't believe you would even think--"

"Just answer the question"

"No! I'm not doing drugs. For gods' sake, May. What's gotten into you?" Natasha asked, utter disbelief in her tone.

"I've checked your records. You have your own personal lab in your apartment." May informed her, and Natasha could feel herself getting more and more agitated. How had May known that? "I know you've been taking chemicals from the labs, and the equipment you've been ordering?"

"Why the sudden interest in me, huh?" Natasha interrupted before May could go on. But May ignored that question for now.

"Your performance has been declining over the past few weeks." May continued. "You're getting distracted, your scores are declining, and not to mention you avoid the medbay as if it's the plague."

"Listen, you have no business going through my files, or doing your own personal investigation on me for that matter." Nat said, her fists involuntarily clenching.

"I do when my agents, my _little_ , are at risk because of your decisions." May countered as she straightened up and crossed her arms in front of her. May was a petite person: Taller than Natasha, but she wasn't a Steve, or a Clint even for that matter. But now her aura was radiating "Big", a Big who's getting awfully protective of her Little. That, and of authority at that. Nat almost wanted to back down. Almost.

"A risk? Are you hearing yourself, agent May?" Natasha asked. "Hill was the one who--"

"--who gave me clearance to investigate you." May cut her off, and that honestly caught Natasha off guard. "I brought all the data to Hill and she agreed to the investigation. And I'm telling you this now, because we have enough suspicion to have you undergo extensive drug tests."

"This is ridiculous." Natasha muttered and she shook her head as she took a step back from May, but May only stepped towards her. "You're not subjecting me to some drug test. I'm not some addict, May would you listen to yourself for a moment?!"

"If you're not taking drugs, then there's nothing you need to worry about." May pointed out.

"I know you're upset that I left the mission yesterday, but Steve was there. It wasn't like they were left out on the field on their own." Natasha argued. "And my declining performance? I--" Natasha wanted to argue on, but something stopped her.

It was a slight pain in her head at first, but then it started to travel down her neck, her spine... And then eventually Natasha came crashing down to the floor.

"Agent Romanoff? Agent Romanoff! Natasha!" By then, Natasha was spasming on the floor. She barely registered May telling FRIDAY to call for help before she blacked out.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hi, there're mentions of suspected drug use here, but no actual drug use~

"Are those two ever on good terms when not dropped?" Tony asked with an amused shake of his head as he scrambled some eggs for the omelets.

It was team breakfast again and it was his and Steve's turn to prepare it. Almost everyone was in Steve's apartment and the Littles were dropped. Sometimes, Steve suspected Wanda and Clint dropped excessively to tire the Bigs out, but he wasn't complaining. He loved being a Big and he loved looking after their Little teammates. He could only hope one day he'd get his own heartmate too.

"Yeah, when it's the two of them against us." Steve chuckled. Clint and Lincoln were currently in the living room fighting over the video game controller, from what Steve gathered.

"I guess it's better off this way, then." Tony joked, earning a look from Steve. "What? Oh come on you know by now that I'm kidding." Tony said before going back to the eggs.

"I know." Steve smiled. It came to a surprise to a lot of people, but Tony Stark was actually a pretty great Big and heartmate to Clint. Not that Steve ever doubted him, but he really admired the man. It was one of his many great qualities, in Steve's opinion.

"You know most of us don't like our bacon burnt." Tony pointed out and Steve finally came to, only now realizing he was in fact overcooking the bacon.

"I thought you liked them crispy." Steve said in what was probably a lame attempt to save face.

"Crispy, not burnt." Tony explained as he poured the rest of the ingredients into the bowl. "What you're doing to that bacon is a criminal offense. I should take you to the precinct for this."

"The precinct?" Steve asked, an amused smile gracing his face as he looked up at Tony.

"As I said, a serious offense." Tony shrugged and went to stand by Steve by the stove so he can cook the omelets already. "So, you check on her last night?" Tony asked quietly as he poured the eggs into the pan.

Steve sighed softly and nodded his head, but he kept his eyes on the bacon this time. "Yeah, yeah I did." He responded. "She seemed well enough." There was a moment's pause before Tony responded.

"So why do you still look so troubled?" Tony's gotten better at reading Steve, that's for sure.

"I don't know, I feel like she's hiding something." Steve said as he flipped the bacon. "Sometimes I just wish she'd let someone in. Anyone, it doesn't even have to be me." Steve shook his head. He tried not to dwell on the fact that the thought alone made his stomach feel all unpleasant.

"Yeah, sometimes I wonder too what goes on in her mind." Tony admitted. "She keeps up a tough facade but we all know she's been through a lot."

"I was hoping you'd say something comforting." Steve admitted, but there was the faintest of smiles on his lips.

"You know I'm not one to sugarcoat." Tony shrugged. "But hey, you know if there's anyone she's going to open up to we all feel like it's you."

"Doesn't feel like it." Steve mumbled, but the idea of that did make Steve feel a little bit better.

"Oh come on. She's less hostile towards you, more receptive of your overbearing protectiveness--"

"I'm not overbearing." Steve argued.

"--and she actually seeks you out sometimes." Tony continued. He was busy cooking the omelets so he missed the confused look on Steve's face. Steve's tone was probably equally confused though.

"She doesn't seek me out." Steve said with a shake of his head.

"Please. The only two people who probably don't notice that or are aware of that are you and Nat." Tony said with a scoff as he put the first omelet on the plate before pouring another batch into the pan. "Don't you remember after the Chitauri invasion?"

"You mean when we all went out to get shawarmas?" Steve asked, it just being the first thing that came to mind.

Tony rolled his eyes in good nature. "Yes, but no. I meant before that."

_"If it's all the same to you," Loki said from his position on the floor, "I'll have that drink now." Really? Steve could not believe the nerve of this god._

_Bruce, or rather, the Hulk grunted in response and Steve had the same sentiments._

_"Alright, get him on his feet." It was Tony who spoke then. The man can be arrogant or hardheaded sometimes, but he can at least pull off a decent plan. "We can all stand around posing up a storm later. By the way, feel free to clean up." Tony said before turning to leave their group huddled around Loki._

_Steve sighed softly and shook his head as he and Clint hoisted up the god of mischief to his feet. "Having a rough day?" Clint asked Loki. Steve was about to tell Clint to stop making pleasantries with the god, just feeling a slight bit protective of his Little teammate. Then he realized how ridiculous he was being because Clint was fully capable of taking care of himself. That, and his question didn't seem all that sincere anyway._

_"I've had better days." Loki shrugged, he was about to say something else but Natasha had spoken up first._

_"Hey, so who gets the uh, magic wand?" Natasha asked as she held the scepter in both hands._

_"Magic wand?" Loki asked in such an offended tone that Steve would have laughed, but he was too busy looking at Natasha. That wand--scepter, was too dangerous._

_"Strike team's coming to secure it." Steve answered, and before anyone else can say anything, he added, "here, let me have it." He said as he moved away from Clint and Loki to approach Natasha, his arm extended out as he waited for Nat to hand it over._

_Natasha's forehead scrunched up in confusion, but she didn't argue against him and just handed it over wordlessly. He thanked Natasha and turned around to walk away, just to get the scepter away from her. As he did, he saw Tony looking at him curiously, but the man didn't say anything so Steve didn't press._

_Steve stood off to the side as he waited for the Strike team to arrive. He was in the middle of pondering over the events of the previous days when the elevator doors opened and out came Sitwell along with some other members of the Strike team. Tony nodded to them in greeting and Sitwell's eyes eventually landed on the scepter in Steve's hands. The man greeted everyone else as he approached Steve._

_"We can take that off your hands." Sitwell said as he neared Steve._

_"By all means." Steve said with a nod as he offered the scepter to Sitwell, making sure to be careful._

_"Be careful with that thing." It was Natasha who spoke up and Steve looked over just to see her walking towards Clint who was at the bar._

_"Unless you want your mind erased." Clint said as he handed Natasha a drink, and Steve felt himself tense up. He wanted to take that drink from Nat's hands, but then he talked some sense into himself. Despite being Little, Natasha was an actual adult. She could have a drink if she wanted to.  
_ _"and not in the fun way." Clint continued, earning a short laugh from Natasha. For some reason that wasn't comforting to Steve._

_"We promise to be careful." Brock Rumlow said as he and Sitwell placed the scepter into some special container. Just then, someone was contacting Steve through his comms, help was needed down in the streets. It was no surprise given the chaos going on just a few minutes ago._

_"On my way down to coordinate search and rescue." Steve said as he walked across the room towards the exit. The elevator would take too long and he knew the rest of the team would be needing it. Right when he was about to leave the room though, Thor spoke up._

_"Captain Rogers, why don't I take over?" Thor suggested, and Steve turned around to look at the god of thunder. Thor was looking straight at him, and there was something about his expression but Steve couldn't put a finger on it._

_"You want to take over search and rescue?" Steve clarified. He just figured Thor might want to stick with Loki, or maybe go back to Asgard already or something. He took the chance to glance around the room and at his teammates: Tony was watching the scene unfold curiously, Bruce was, well... Trying not to break anything else, and Clint was eyeing Natasha who looked a bit uncomfortable for some reason._

_"Yeah I figured I can you know, maybe do it a little quicker. No offense." Thor shrugged and broke him out of his thoughts._

_"None taken." Steve said with a shrug. He had a feeling Thor was right, anyway. At that, Thor bid them goodbye and left the penthouse to go coordinate search and rescue in lieu of Steve. The Strike team was still packing up and coordinating Loki's transfer, so the team waited for them to be ready. Once that was done, Steve walked to the elevator along with everybody else. Natasha was about to step in, but then FRIDAY alerted them that the elevator was at full capacity. Steve was standing to the side, so he couldn't really see Natasha's face._

_"It's fine, I can go take the next trip. I'll wait with Bruce." Natasha said, but without missing a beat Tony spoke up._

_"Actually, I think I forgot my wallet in my room." Tony said as he stood from where he was sitting on top of the case. "You go on ahead with them, Nat." On his way out, Tony accidentally bumped into Clint, causing him to move left and away from Steve. Once off the elevator, Tony looked at Nat and didn't leave until she got on, as if making sure she got on okay._

_Natasha seemed to visibly relax once she was inside, but Steve chalked it up to just being done with the day already. "So we're meeting Tony in the lobby or at the shawarma place?" Clint asked._

_"Let's just wait for him in the lobby." Steve said. "I'll let Thor know where it is so he can meet us there afterwards."_

_"I think I'll pass, guys." Natasha said from beside Steve. "I'll head back to the Triskelion."_

_"What, why?" Clint turned his head to look at Natasha. "This is supposed to be the best shawarma place in town, according to Stark."_

_"I don't know, I just want to rest." Natasha said with a shrug. Steve wasn't sure how he really felt about Natasha going back on her own, but it seemed like he didn't like that idea._

_"It's just going to be a quick meal, Nat." Steve said, and Natasha turned her head to look up at him. Quite frankly, Natasha did look tired, and Steve felt a little bad for trying to get her to come with them still. "Just come with us to the restaurant. If you still feel like going back once we get there, then we can order take out and I'll go back with you."_

_Natasha frowned slightly and she looked like she was contemplating the offer. She shifted on her feet as she did, and just as they reached the lobby she gave her answer. "Yeah, okay. That sounds fine." Natasha said softly. That put Steve more at ease than he'd thought it would._

"I don't think I've ever told you this yet, but at that point we all haven't been together that long." Tony said, breaking Steve out of his trip down memory lane "Didn't know much about you guys except your weird costume choices--hey ow!" Steve playfully smacked Tony's arm at that, and Tony glared playfully at Steve before he continued.

"Point is, didn't know much about you and Nat so I just assumed that you two were heartmates." Tony casually said, as if it was no big deal. But it was, even though it wasn't real. Steve's never said this out loud, but he always had this hunch that maybe Natasha would be his heartmate. He didn't want to get his hopes up though: The thought of potentially finding the one was overwhelming. So he squashed the thought and just thought that Natasha brought out this natural protectiveness out of Bigs. The fact that someone else thought he and Natasha were heartmates...

"Anyway," Tony continued after a while, "didn't really forget my wallet in my bedroom that day. I just observed how Natasha would keep looking your way while we were at the penthouse. And she visibly relaxes when she's near you. You were awfully protective as well, even during the battle." Tony said, finally looking at Steve with an eyebrow raised.

"I was not protective... During the battle." Steve defended himself. Or so he tried.

"Not going to waste my time arguing that, you think what you want to think." Tony said. "And come on, you thought point break really wanted to coordinate search and rescue?" Tony scoffed.

"Well... Yes." Steve said a bit pathetically.

"He didn't." Tony said in a matter-of-fact tone. "Guy doesn't know his way around our streets, Cap. That didn't occur to you?" Tony asked, and Steve actually felt stupid for not realizing that. Before he could dwell on it though, Tony spoke again.  
"Nat tensed up pretty bad when you were leaving." Tony continued to explain. "And I think Thor had the same thoughts I did because he didn't miss a beat in volunteering to take your place."

"I'm really that dense?" Steve asked, and Tony gave him a sympathetic smile.

"Yeap." He said before transferring another fresh omelet onto the plate.

"When you bumped into Clint. That wasn't accidental, huh?" Steve asked as he thought back to it.

"Maybe not as dense as I thought." Tony amended.

"Uncle Steve uncle Steve!" It was Wanda who came running in, still in her pink Belle pajamas.

"Hi sweetheart." Steve smiled as he turned around and crouched down, opening his arms for Wanda to come into. The Little came running towards him, giggling as she crashed into Steve. He kissed the side of her head and stood up with Wanda in his arms before turning back to the stove.

"Can we play tea party now pleaaaaase?" Wanda asked. "Pretty pretty pleaaaase? You promised me and Daisy we're gonna play tea party today." Yes, that was true, he did promise that to his nieces.

"I'm cooking right now, Wanda. If I don't cook that little tummy of yours is going to be a rumbling monster." Steve said as he gave Wanda's tummy a tickle with his free hand, causing her to giggle and squirm in his arms. "I'll play with you and Daisy after breakfast, okay?" He smiled, and Wanda cheered.

"Daisy!! Uncle Steve's gonna play tea party with us after breakfast!" Wanda yelled back to the living room, causing both Steve and Tony to wince.

"Indoor voice, please." Tony said gently, but it was drowned by Daisy cheering from the living room, and Clint's and Lincoln's protests. Moments later, all the Littles have gathered in the kitchen.

"Uncle Steeeeve, you promised you were gonna play Mario Kart with me and Lincoln." Clint whined, and Lincoln looked as equally upset too. Steve sighed and turned off the stove once he transferred all the bacon onto the plate.

"Uncle Steve already said he's gonna play tea party with me and Daisy, so you gotta wait your turn." Wanda said, turning her head so she can look at Clint.

"He doesn't wanna play some stupid girly game." Clint said, his face showing utter disgust as if playing tea party was the most offensive thing in the whole world.

"Just because you don't know how to play it doesn't mean it's stupid." Daisy defended this time as she crossed her arms in front of her chest and pouted.

"It's pretending to pour tea into cups and drinking invisible tea! How hard could it be?! It's stupid." Lincoln said. "Mario Kart's way cooler than some tea party, and uncle Steve's cool so he wants to play that."

"He already said he's gonna play with me and Wanda!" Daisy argued.

"Okay how about we let uncle Steve have a say in this, hm?" Steve said as he walked towards the Littles with Wanda still in his arms. He just wanted to diffuse the bomb before this all went downhill. Grumpy Littles at team breakfast never went well. "Kiddo, I did promise Wanda and Daisy first." He smiled apologetically at Clint and then Lincoln, and Daisy and Wanda cheered yet again.

"But you're also right, I did promise that we'll play Mario Kart." Steve said with a soft chuckle. "How about we all play tea party for an hour after breakfast, then we can play Mario Kart for an hour after that?" He suggested.

"Aww but Wanda and Daisy are gonna ruin it 'cause they're just babies." Clint pouted.

Before the two girls could argue though, Tony stepped in. "Bubs you know better than that." Tony said in his best dad voice. "Play nice or there won't be any playtime at all."

"Fiiiine." Clint said with a groan, but he turned to leave the kitchen and Lincoln quickly followed after him, leaving Tony and Steve with the two other Littles.

"Do you two want to help me and uncle Tony with breakfast?" Steve smiled at Wanda then at Daisy.

"Yeah yeah yeah! Me and Wanda are good helpers!" Daisy said happily as she jumped up and down in excitement and Tony chuckled at the Little's enthusiasm. They still had quite a bit more to cook, so there was plenty of easy tasks the two girls could help with. Of course, Steve knew them "helping" would just lead to them taking longer, but if it made Daisy and Wanda happy...

Luckily the two girls were still in their pajamas because they caused quite a mess. Tony had to clean the two up with wet napkins while Steve set the table and served the food. "FRIDAY, is Natasha up?" Steve asked as he set down the plates on the dining table.

"Miss Romanoff has been awake for quite a while. She has already eaten and is currently getting ready in her room." FRIDAY reported. Steve wasn't going to deny it, he was a bit disappointed that Natasha won't be joining them. At least though this meant that Natasha was feeling well. If Steve remembered correctly, she'd probably be heading to the shooting range in a bit.

"So Natasha's not joining us, then?" Tony asked as he came in with the plate of omelets, and two Little girls trailing behind him. Their pajama shirts were still a disaster but Steve supposed that was the best they could do.

"Nope, FRIDAY says she's already eaten." Steve said, trying his best to hide the disappointment in his voice.

"But Nat doesn't eat breakfast." Wanda pointed out as she tried to reach for a pancake with her bare hand, but Tony shook his head and stopped the Little. Despite never dropping, the other Littles never called Natasha "auntie Nat", it just didn't feel right with them because Natasha's still a Little. Nat was more of like a big sister to them instead. Never mind that Nat was actually the smallest among them.  
"She just drinks coffee." Wanda said before looking up at Tony and pouting.

"Yeah, that's why you want us to always have team breakfasts right?" Daisy spoke this time, and Steve looked at her with his forehead scrunched up. Was he really that easy to read?

"Okay you two," Tony stepped in as he put one hand on Wanda's back and the other on Daisy's. "Why don't you call the others for breakfast, hm?" He said as he gently nudged the two girls to the living room. The two girls seemed happy to be trusted with another responsibility so they went running off to the living room, probably to drag everyone to the table.

"You can always catch up with her and check if she wants to have lunch with you." Tony suggested as he helped Steve finish setting the table. "You know she's more open to that with you--well, and Clint. But that's besides the point."

"I guess I can do that." Steve said softly with a nod. "You think she'll mind if I join her in the shooting range?"

"You barely use guns," Tony pointed out. "So apart from finding it suspicious, yeah I think she'll mind. If she was well enough to get up and decide to continue her routine, I think you can leave her on her own for a while, Steve." Tony said gently.

"I know, I know." Steve sighed. He knew he was starting to get a bit overbearing again, so he tried to tone it down a bit. Before he could dwell more on his thoughts, the rest of their team came piling into the dining room, so Steve put on his smile again. They were rarely complete at team breakfasts because everyone had such busy schedules, but they still tried their best to make this a thing, whether complete or not. This breakfast was a pretty sizeable bunch with Steve, Tony, Wanda, Daisy, Lincoln, Clint, Sam, and Jemma.

Breakfast went as well as you'd expect it to with four hyperactive Littles. Steve thought it would've been better with Natasha there, but he was trying not to dwell on that. Luckily the Littles served as a good distraction from his thoughts because they seemed to have been done pulling each other's hair. If anything, they were actually getting along.

"Uncle Steve are we gonna go play tea party now?" Wanda asked hopefully as she climbed up onto Steve's lap once they were all done. She sat facing him so she could look up at Steve with her big, doe eyes. "Pretty pleaaaase?"

"Yeah! Bunny and Chip are waiting for us!" Daisy said, referring to her stuffed bunny named Bunny, and Wanda's stuffed cat named Chip.

"I don't knooow... I think I'm so full I'm just about ready for a nap." Steve teased, a smile playing on his face as he grabbed a napkin and wiped Wanda's face clean.

"Awww but uncle Steeeve!" Wanda whined and tried to evade Steve's hand, but Steve's had a lot of experience already with the squirmy Little so he managed to get her cleaned up.

"You just seem so cuddly I can almost fall asleep here." Steve said. He set down the napkin before wrapping his arms around Wanda, hugging her like a little teddy bear and pretending to sleep: Complete with snores and all.

"Noo don't be silly!" Wanda giggled and shook her head. Now there was no favoritism in Steve's books, but Wanda was in fact the Little that Steve was closest to. There was no denying it either that Wanda absolutely loved her uncle Steve.

"I'm not being silly, you just give really good cuddles." Steve smiled as he basically nuzzled his cheek on top of Wanda's head.

"We can cuddle another time! Now it's time for a tea party." Wanda giggled as she tried to push Steve away. "Uncle Steeeeve c'mon!"

"Alright, alright." Steve chuckled and sat up after kissing Wanda on her forehead. Wanda and Daisy cheered once more and Wanda basically hopped off of his lap. The two Littles took either of Steve's hands and practically dragged him out of his chair. Since the team spent a lot of time in Steve's apartment, there was actually an entire section in his living room set aside for the Littles' toys.

"Are we going to have the tea party at the coffee table?" Steve asked as he let the two girls drag him to the living room.

"It's not a _coffee_ table, uncle Steve." Daisy said with a shake of his head. "It's the tea party table!"

"Right, I'm sorry. The tea party table." Steve chuckled softly. Once they got to the shelves that held a lot of their toys, the girls let go of Steve to get their little tea party set. Steve knew the drill by now so he got some of the throw pillows and placed them around the coffee table for them to sit on. He also set aside the potted plants and waited for the Littles to bring over their toys. They liked setting up the tea party themselves, so Steve sat down on the couch first and waited. Bunny and Chip were just on the couch too, so he went ahead and sat them down at their usual spots.

"Do you girls need any help?" Steve asked anyway, in case the girls were open to it this time.

"Nuh uh, we got it!" Wanda said confidently as she came over with some of the cups while Daisy brought the teapot.

"I see we're using the princess set today." Steve said. The girls had two sets in Steve's apartment, just for variety.

"Uhhuh, so they can match our jammies." Daisy said with a nod of his head, and Steve chuckled softly. The two girls did love their princesses.

"Maybe we can get matching princess shirts with uncle Steve!" Wanda said excitedly, and Daisy's eyes widened at that.

"Yeah! I'm gonna ask my mommy when we can go to the mall next so we can buy shirts!" Daisy said excitedly. Quite frankly, Steve was not looking forward to wearing a princess shirt, but if it made the girls happy then he'll live with it.

"You know that sounds like a really great idea." Steve smiled, and that made the Little girls absolutely happy.

"Maybe we can get shirts with all the princesses on 'em." Wanda said as she set up their tea cups and saucers.

"Uhhuh, and it's gotta be pink and glittery." Daisy said seriously. She was taking care of the toy pastries and Steve couldn't help but smile at how seriously the girls treated their tea party. Once everything was set, Steve took his spot on the floor between Bunny and Chip while Wanda and Daisy sat on the other side of their stuffed animals.

"What kind of tea are we having today?" Steve asked as he reached for the teapot so he can serve everyone their tea.

"It's the special rainbow kind." Wanda said happily.

"Uhhuh, rainbow flavored with hints of cimmamon." Daisy said with a nod, and Steve smiled fondly at that.

"Well that sounds delicious." Steve said as he poured the girls their tea before moving onto the stuffed toys.

"Steve." Steve looked up to see Tony standing by the doorway separating the dining and living rooms. Steve was about to invite him to join their tea party, but then he saw the look on Tony's face. "Can we hit pause on this for a moment?"

"Yeah, sure." Steve said with a slight frown before turning to Wanda and Daisy. "I just need to talk with uncle Tony for a moment, okay? Don't finish all the treats without me." He said with a playful wink. Wanda and Daisy frowned but they nodded their head and let Steve leave without a fuss.  
"What's up?" Steve asked softly once he'd approached Tony.

"Bruce just called." Tony said quietly, perhaps so that the girls wouldn't overhear. "It's Natasha, he says she's been brought to the medbay and he needs you to come over."

"I'm sorry, what?" Steve asked and he swore he felt his stomach drop. Nat rarely went to the medbay. In fact, if it could be avoided--which was almost always the case with Natasha, she'd probably never go there. And the fact that Tony said that Natasha was _brought_ to the medbay, and not that she didn't go on her own?

"Bruce didn't want to give me details over the phone. He just told me he needs you to come down for her." Tony said as calmly as he could. "Usually they'd call the heartmate, but Natasha... Well, you're her team leader. That's the closest Bruce could think of for Nat." The fact that that was true made Steve sad. Natasha deserved someone more than a team leader.

"Yeah, um, alright. Okay, I'll head down, I just..." Steve mumbled as he turned a bit to glance back at the two girls. He didn't know what to say without making them panic.

"It's fine, I'll take care of them. Just go, Natasha needs you." Natasha needs him. That was more than enough to get Steve going and he nodded his head. He thanked Tony and bid him goodbye before brisk walking to the front of his apartment and leaving. He was so focused on Natasha he'd forgotten to say goodbye to the girls and only realized it once he was in the elevator. He told himself he'll make it up to them another time. Right now, he needed to get to Natasha ASAP. What could have happened?

The elevator couldn't move fast enough for the life of him, but finally he reached the medbay's floor. He knew the ins and outs of this floor already, sadly, so Steve easily made his way to the main section. One of the medics saw Steve and asked him to wait as he called Bruce out. Now that Steve was at the medbay, he was feeling even more nervous than he had: As if the dread was starting to sink in. If they managed to bring Natasha to the medbay, that must mean that it was pretty bad. He mentally slapped himself though because he needed to keep it together.  
Natasha didn't need him to panic, Natasha would need him for support.

Steve didn't even bother sitting down because he was feeling too restless, but luckily there seemed to be no need to have. Bruce came into view moments later looking mildly concerned, which didn't sit well with Steve. "Steve," Bruce nodded to him in greeting, and Steve gave him a tight smile. It was the most Steve could manage. "Why don't we talk in my office?" If Steve wasn't nervous then (which he was), he was now. He nodded his head in response and followed Bruce to his office, where he sat down on the chair opposite Bruce at his desk.

"What happened?" Steve asked as his eyebrows knit together.

"It's Natasha. I got an alert a while back from May, she said it was an emergency. Natasha had passed out in the shooting range, and May tells me that Nat was actually spasming on the floor. By the time I got there though, she was unconscious and lying still." Bruce said, and Steve blinked a couple of times as he tried to take in that information. When it seemed like Steve wasn't going to say anything, Bruce continued.

"So we brought her to the medbay, and I asked agent May what happened." Bruce continued, and then he went on to inform Steve of May's suspicions on Natasha taking illegal drugs: How she'd gotten the clearance from Hill to investigate Natasha, and now she had enough evidence to actually warrant subjecting Natasha to several drug tests. "She's agreed not to file any reports until I finish the tests--"

"You took tests?" Steve asked with his eyebrows furrowed, he sounded awfully offended. Did Bruce actually believe May's suspicions? This was _Natasha_ they were talking about.

"Steve, we found a little ziploc bag with a single pill in it in her jacket pocket." Bruce said gently, and that got Steve. Was Natasha going through something? How could he not have noticed that? Was it so bad that Natasha was actually resorting to illegal drugs? Was May right, and was he just neglectful?  
Sure, Natasha liked to be independent, she disliked having too much attention on her. But she was still a Little, a Little with no Big. The least Steve could have done was to keep a closer eye on her even from afar.

"Now, before we jump to conclusions," Bruce continued, effectively breaking Steve from his thoughts, "I decided to run tests on the pill as well. For all we know, it could be just some pain medication." That's right, maybe Natasha just had some special meds.  
"I just had to do the drug tests because well, Steve, the circumstances did just fit the bill."

"So you think Natasha's taking drugs?" Steve asked, sounding a bit colder than he'd intended.

"No, I know Natasha. I don't think she's taking anything illegal, but to quiet everyone else you know I had to do it." Bruce said, and Steve could hear the exasperation in his voice. "I should get the results in a few minutes, and you'll be the first to know." He said, and Bruce nodded. Bruce didn't speak for a while, probably letting Steve take all this information in. At least the next time Bruce spoke, it was relatively good news.

"Nat's awake, by the way." Bruce said. "I looked her over, and she seems fine. It's also why I didn't believe agent May's suspicions because _if_ she did take drugs, then I would've picked up something in her bloodstream."

"So if you say she's okay, then what happened to her?" Steve asked in confusion.

"That's what I'm trying to figure out. I have a hunch, but I'll wait to confirm it with the results before I bring it up. No use doing so if we're not sure." Bruce said, and Steve frowned.

"You think it has something to do with the pill, don't you?"

"Unfortunately I do." Bruce said solemnly. "I don't think it's anything illegal, that much I can say. But I've had my own suspicions with Natasha for a while now and well..." Bruce shrugged. And Steve waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

"Can I see her?" Steve asked softly after a while.

"Ah, yes. Yes you can. That's why I called you, actually." Bruce said as he straightened his glasses. "I want Natasha under closer supervision for a few days."

"I thought you said you don't think she's taking drugs?" Steve frowned.

"I said she's not taking anything illegal. We still have that pill to consider, Steve." Bruce reminded Steve gently, and Steve knew he was right. Even if it wasn't illegal, that was the only lead they had on the cause for Natasha dropping like that in the middle of the range. "I think it'll be good for the both of you, for Natasha especially. It's not house arrest or anything." Bruce said, trying to inject some humor into it.

But Steve wasn't laughing. He went back to his conversation with Tony earlier, on how Tony and Thor both thought that Steve and Natasha were supposed to be heartmates. Did Bruce think that too? "Just think of it like an impromptu, lengthy sleepover in your apartment. I'm prescribing rest for the next three days--so no strenuous activities and especially field work." Bruce said, pulling Steve out of his thoughts. 

"Yeah, okay." Was all Steve managed. "So she can get discharged?"

"Right after we get the lab results." Bruce said with a nod. "Unless anything alarming comes up, but I'm banking on there not being any. It seems she already hit the worst of it back in the range." That at least provided a small relief. "Come on, I put her in the private room nearest my office." Bruce said as he stood and waited for Steve to do the same.

Steve took a breath and nodded his head before standing and following after Bruce to Natasha's room. Upon entering the room, Steve noticed that Natasha was in fact awake. She looked a little worse for wear, but at least she didn't have any tubes attached to her. Steve told himself that at least meant Natasha was stable, right?

"Hey Nat, there's someone here to see you." Bruce said in a gentle voice, the voice Steve knew Bruce used on his Little patients. But if Natasha didn't like that, she didn't show it. She just turned her head to look at them and smiled weakly, but the smile didn't quite reach her eyes.  
Steve had half expected her to complain and tell them to discharge her already, but she didn't. Maybe she wasn't as well as he'd thought.

"Hey Steve." Natasha said, and she cleared her throat because her voice came out a little hoarse at first. "Came to get me out of this place?" Ah, there it was. A watered down version, but it was there.

"I told you Nat, we'll discharge you once we have an okay based on your results." Bruce said soothingly, and Natasha huffed so Steve gave her a sympathetic smile. "I'll leave you two for a moment, but I'll be back when I have the results." Bruce said. Steve nodded his head and quietly thanked him before walking over to Natasha's bed. He sat down on the chair beside the bed and just looked at Natasha.

"Steve, you're looking at me as if I'm dying." Natasha pointed out after a few moments.

"Sorry, sorry." Steve sighed and shook his head to snap himself out of it. "How're you feeling?"

"I don't know." Natasha shook her head slightly. "I'm okay, I guess." She said softly.

"You want to tell me what happened?"

"No, not really." Natasha mumbled, and she turned her head so she probably avoid looking at Steve, but he reached over and gently stopped her.

"Hey, no avoiding me like that." Steve said gently. "We don't have to talk about it if you're not ready. But when you ever do feel ready, you know you can always come to me."

"I know." Natasha said with the smallest of smiles. "Why'd you come?" Ah, Steve should have anticipated this question.

"I heard you passed out in the shooting range, so I wanted to come and check on you." Steve said. It wasn't a complete lie. Even if Bruce didn't ask him to come, he still would've gone to check on Nat. He just didn't want to bring the pill up yet because Nat probably didn't know that he knew. Heck, Nat maybe didn't even know that they found it. If they had to bring it up, Steve wanted to make sure Nat was well enough to have that conversation first.  
"We missed you at breakfast today." Steve said, also to change the topic.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about missing it." Nat apologized. "Did Clint and the others cause any more trouble this time?" She asked, and Steve chuckled. There was never a boring team breakfast, that's for sure.

"Not much, actually. Probably the most interesting would be making plans on going shopping with Daisy and Wanda. Prepare to see me in a Disney princess shirt sometime soon. Daisy and Wanda want us to have matching shirts." Steve said with an amused smile. Natasha smiled and chuckled, but Steve could feel that it wasn't completely genuine. He didn't bring attention to it though.  
"I think they'll like it if you get one with us." Steve pointed out gently, just to test something out.

"No, that's your special thing with them." Natasha shook her head, but Steve noted that she didn't really say she didn't want to.

"Come on, you're their big sister. I'm sure they'd love to have matching shirts with you too." Steve smiled. Nat looked like she was pondering it over for a while, until she eventually nodded her head.

"Yeah okay, I'll go with you guys. For Wanda and Daisy." That last bit sounded like an afterthought, but Steve didn't dwell on it. He was just happy he got Natasha to agree to something like that. Even though Nat never dropped, Nat still had her Little side somewhere inside, and Steve loved the little moments when that side would show. Even if it was just a tiny bit.

"I'm sure it'll be fun. We can all even go see a movie after." Steve suggested, and he felt all warm inside when he saw a genuine smile on Natasha's face.

"Yeah, I think that sounds nice." Natasha said softly. Steve nodded and smiled as he reached over to gently brush Natasha's hair from her face. Natasha didn't flinch away, so Steve took that as a good sign. When his hand brushed against her skin though, he frowned at how cold she felt.

"Are you cold?" Steve asked in concern, but he was already trying to pull the blanket up to Nat's shoulders.

"A little, but it's fine. I can manage." Natasha insisted, but she didn't fight being tucked in. Steve shook his head and reached for the AC's remote, increasing the temperature a bit so it wouldn't be too cold in the room.

"Is that better?" Steve asked. He ignored the blush on Natasha's cheeks and just smiled when she nodded her head. He'd taken care of Littles before, no doubt about that. But taking care of Natasha always felt different. It felt right. She rarely let Steve take care of her like this, but Steve loved the rare occasions that she did, even if they were just short moments and small tasks.

"So how'd the mission go yesterday?" Natasha asked after a while, probably to break the silence. Steve was surprised she asked about that, but maybe the silence was just making Natasha uncomfortable. So he indulged her and told her all about it: How Skye seemed to be improving out on the field, getting a better control of her powers. He went on, telling Natasha all the details but he made sure not to say anything that could upset her. Natasha for her part, would not as she listened and laughed whenever Steve said something particularly funny.  
They hadn't even realized how much time had passed until Bruce came in to check on Natasha again.

"Do you want me to leave first while Bruce talks to you?" Steve asked gently as he helped Natasha sit up against the pillows per her request.

"No it's fine, you can stay." Natasha said after a moment's hesitation. Steve could sense the hesitation, but he also didn't want to leave Natasha's side just yet, so he stayed put. He saw Nat look up at Bruce and nod to him, so Bruce started to tell them about the lab tests he ran.

"For the most part Nat, you seem to be healthy. Heartrate and blood pressure are normal, blood count's perfect, lungs are clear--I can go on with all the basic tests but it all boils down to me telling you that those seem to be fine." Bruce said, looking at Natasha first then at Steve.

"You said for the most part." Steve pointed out when Natasha didn't seem to be offering any input after a while.

"Yes, well, I saw in your records that agent Fitz ran a quick test on you yesterday, so I decided to do a more intensive version of that." Bruce said, and Steve recalled Fitz mentioning that they did run a test on Natasha, but only to find that she had some headache or increased stress levels or something.  
"Natasha, I'll be very straight with you. It was more than a headache. I was able to pinpoint some abnormal brain activity, but the cause of which I can't determine for sure right now."

Steve knew what Bruce meant. There was a possibility that it was linked to the pill that Natasha took, but he was probably waiting to see if Nat would say anything about it. Steve looked at Natasha, and could not for the life of him read her expression. It was as if she wiped any emotion off her face and was just looking blankly at Bruce.

"Have you taken or eaten anything new in the past few days?" Bruce asked as gently as he could when Natasha didn't offer anything. "Any new medication? Maybe something to help that headache you had last night?" Bruce probed, but Natasha wasn't showing any signs of hearing Bruce.

"Natasha, we need to know the cause of this." Bruce sighed.

"What even makes you think that I took anything new?" Nat asked defensively. Well, at least she was responding now. "If this has something to do with agent May--you have no business... She had no business to say something like that." She said.

"She may have told me something, but Natasha--"

"And you believe her?" Nat asked incredulously. "You think I'm some addict?"

"I didn't say that." Bruce said calmly. "But I think there's an external cause to this abnormal brain activity, and Nat I really need to know if you introduced anything new to your body so we can get to the bottom of this."

"I'm not telling you anything because there's nothing to tell." Natasha said, her eyes narrowing a little. Steve sighed and looked up at Bruce. This wasn't getting them anywhere.

"Can I talk to Nat for a moment?" Steve asked, and Bruce nodded his head in understanding before turning to leave to give them privacy. Once Bruce left them, Steve got up and sat down on the edge of Nat's bed, turning a bit to face her.

"Nat," Steve started of in a soft, gentle voice. "All Bruce wants to do, all we want to do, is to help. You know you can trust us." Steve said, and Natasha took in a deep breath and shook her head.

"Can you look at me? Nat honey, come on." Steve said, unconsciously using the term of endearment with Nat. That seemed to work though, because Nat did turn to look at Steve. Once she did, it was then he finally realized how troubled Natasha actually looked. It was as if she let her guard down once Bruce left the room.

You know I'll never let anything happen to you, and I won't let anyone do anything to you." Steve said in a soothing voice. "I just want to help, and so does Bruce. But we can't help if you just shut us out." Steve continued.

"You're gonna get mad." Natasha said in the softest, and most vulnerable voice that Steve's ever heard from her. Steve frowned at that and shook his head.

"Honey I promise I won't get mad." Steve said soothingly. At this point, he figured there wasn't anything Nat could say or do that'd make him mad. "You can tell me anything, and I'll still be here. Nothing you say or do will push me away from you."

Nat sniffled and cast her eyes down. She stayed silent for a few more moments, Steve hoped she was considering telling him. He stayed quiet first to let Natasha think about it. He waited, and he waited, and just when he was about to say something, Natasha beat him to hit.

"I may have taken something new this morning." Natasha said softly without really looking at Steve.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter than my past two chapters, but I hope you guys enjoy anyway~  
> Happy holidays! (:

_Natasha_

"Honey, I promise I won't get mad." There it was again, Steve calling her honey. The first time Steve said it, Natasha somehow convinced herself that she imagined it. But this second time, there was no fooling herself. Something about Steve using that term of endearment with her made her feel all warm inside. "You can tell me anything, and I'll still be here. Nothing you say or do will push me away from you."

Natasha was firm about her decision on keeping quiet. She told herself no one was going to find out about her pills. It wasn't that the pills were illegal, per se. Everything she used to make her first batch came from SHIELD's labs, so she was pretty sure that meant nothing illegal. It was just that she didn't want to deal with the inevitable judgment that would come when people find out. What would they think if they found out she still used something from the Red Room?

And this was Steve. Steve was probably one of the last people Natasha wanted to disappoint. Just the sheer thought of it was getting Natasha emotional and she actually found herself sniffling: What the hell? She cast her eyes down to avoid Steve's gaze (and so she can rapidly blink away her tears without Steve noticing). But then again, that was the point: This is Steve.

If there's anyone she _could_ tell about this, it's Steve.

"I may have taken something new this morning." Natasha said before she could stop herself.   
She took a chance and tilted her head up to look at Steve. She studied his expression and it didn't take her long to understand that it was actually a look of concern that he had.

"Can you tell me what it was?" Steve asked in a gentle voice. Well, given the outburst she had with Bruce earlier, Natasha supposed Steve knew already; or at least that he had a hunch. Even then though, she wasn't sure she wanted to tell Steve exactly what it was. But then why had she told him she'd taken something to begin with?

Natasha didn't verbally answer him, but she shook her head no. Her stubbornness was definitely creeping up again.

"Why don't you want to tell me?"

"Because you're going to tell Bruce." Natasha said when she realized that her issue wasn't telling Steve. It was that if she told Steve, he'd be obligated to tell Bruce, then her secret would be out. For sure, they wouldn't allow her to continue taking the pills: Not after this happened.

"Nat," Steve started in that same gentle voice he used earlier, "I know... I know you had a pretty rough morning with agent May, Bruce told me that." Of course he did, but strangely she didn't feel upset that Steve knew. If anything... Was this relief?   
"And I know it can be pretty scary or upsetting, even the Black Widow gets scared or upset sometimes." Steve said with a small smile. "But I promise you we're on your side. No matter what, okay? You can trust us, you can trust me. All I want to do right now is to make sure that you'll be okay."

Steve's voice sounded so genuine and soft that Natasha was starting to feel comforted by it. Pair that up with his concerned expression and Natasha felt like she was going to break down from the overwhelming and confusing emotions she had. "It was..." She started to say, but she stopped herself. Once she told Steve, there'd be no going back.

Nat didn't even realize she brought her right hand up to her mouth to bite on her nails, until Steve reached out and gently tugged her hand away. She blushed at the realization that Steve caught her. Over the past few months, it'd been a bad habit that Nat developed whenever she was stressed out, and Nat was stressed out quite a lot. Which only meant that her nails were a disaster by now. She was about to apologize and pull her hand away, but when Steve didn't let go of her hand and just gave it a gentle squeeze, all thoughts flew out the window. Just that simple gesture alone got to Natasha.

Steve never judged her no matter what she did. All he ever was towards her was caring and supportive. She was half expecting Steve to nudge her, to prompt her again to tell him. But he didn't.

She realized Steve was probably waiting for her, giving her the time to tell him when she was ready. Maybe she'll never be ready to let anyone in on her secret, but right now she was ready to stop feeling so alone for once. These past few minutes with Steve were the most comforted she'd felt in weeks. And it was always like this with him.

"It was a pill." Natasha said in an incredibly soft voice. She was looking down at her lap again because she was still nervous that Steve would judge her. But his tone was anything but judgmental.

"What was the pill for?" Steve asked, his tone still gentle and concerned.

"It was some... Medication." She answered. In place of nibbling on her nails again she just fiddled with the edge of her blanket.

"For that migraine you had last night?" Steve clarified. "It was supposed to help with the pain, yeah?"

"You can say that." Natasha shrugged, still looking down at her lap.

"Nat, I'm going to need a little more than that so I can help you, honey." Steve said, and Natasha could almost hear the frown in his voice.

"My head's feeling better already though. Maybe we can just let it slide." Natasha said, but she had a feeling that was quite a long shot, and she was right because she looked up to see Steve shaking her head. It was worth a try, at least.

"I don't want to risk that." Steve said. "I'm glad your head's not hurting right now, but there could be other things going on that we can't see or feel."

"If I tell you, they might make me leave." Natasha said softly, and she could feel tears building up in her eyes. Even though she probably didn't show it, she saw SHIELD as her family, especially her team. What if they made her leave because of this? Was that even allowed?

"I'm not going to let that happen." Steve said in a gentle yet firm voice. "I'm on your side, honey. I'll protect you no matter what. I promise." Nat bit down on her lower lip to stop it from trembling. That really meant a lot to her, especially coming from Steve. She was just so tired and hearing Steve say that gave her a little bit of hope. Maybe she doesn't have to do this alone: Would Steve understand and help her stop her drops?

"It's... The pill wasn't really for a migraine." Natasha said, and she could sense some renewed hope from Steve; probably because they were finally getting somewhere.

"What's it mainly for, then?" Steve asked. Natasha took a deep, shaky breath and closed her eyes for a moment before speaking up again.

"They're for my drops. Or, well, they're supposed to stop my drops." Nat said in such an incredibly soft voice, that she was sure Steve probably wouldn't have heard her if he wasn't sitting so close.

"So you've been taking them for quite a while, then?" Steve asked, and Nat was relieved that she couldn't sense any judgment in Steve's voice or features. If anything, she was picking up on some concern.

"Yes, but I ran out of the original batch." Natasha admitted with a frown. "So I tried to replicate them on my own, and well, the pill I took this morning was my first batch."

"Natasha..." Steve trailed off and then he sighed softly.

"I'm sorry." Natasha wasn't even sure why she was apologizing. It's just that Steve seemed so troubled right now and she didn't like it. Maybe she should have just kept quiet.

"Thank you for telling me." Steve said softly, and he gave Natasha's hand another reassuring squeeze. She'd even forgotten that he was holding her hand in the first place. "I'd want to hear more about this another time, okay? If you're open to talking about it with me, I'll listen. Right now I think we need to tell Bruce about this too, okay?"

"Bruce isn't going to take me away?" Natasha asked softly, unsure where this vulnerability was coming from. All she knew was that her head was starting to get a little fuzzy, but she chalked it up to her being tired.

"Bruce won't take you away." Steve confirmed. "I won't let anyone take you away."

Much to Natasha's dismay, she found herself actually sniffling. She reached up with her free hand and hastily wiped the tear that managed to escape her eye.

"It'll be okay, Nat." Steve said soothingly, and she saw him reach out towards her then hesitate for a moment, until he finally decided to retract his free hand. She heard Steve sighing softly and he didn't say anything for a moment, but then he probably decided this couldn't wait any longer.

Eventually, Steve called Bruce back in, saying that they need to talk. Bruce suggested that they can talk in his office, but Steve was quick to say no: They can just talk out in the hall instead. Natasha had a feeling Steve wanted to stay close by in case she tried to make a run for it. She couldn't blame him, but it also hurt her to think that Steve didn't trust her enough to leave her alone for a few minutes.

"We'll just be right outside your door, okay?" Steve told Natasha in his soothing voice. He was still sitting down on the bed, his hand holding hers as he rubbed circles on the back of her hand with his thumb. Nat found the gesture oddly comforting. "If you need anything, just call out."

"Okay." Natasha said softly with a nod of her head. Steve gave her another reassuring smile before he stood up. When Steve let go of her hand, part of Natasha wanted to actually go after him, but she snapped herself out of it and stayed put. She sighed to herself as she watched Steve exit the room with Bruce.

_Steve_

When Steve saw a tear escape Natasha's eye, that was when he knew that something really was wrong. Natasha never cried in front of anyone, and he meant _anyone_. Granted, she wasn't really crying per se, but this was probably the first time Steve ever saw Natasha be this vulnerable.

"It'll be okay, Nat." Steve said in what he hoped was the most soothing voice he could muster. He reached a hand out, intending to smooth down Natasha's hair in what he hoped was a comforting manner, but he stopped himself. Maybe Nat wouldn't appreciate that much affection. He felt he was already pushing it with holding Nat's hand. He didn't want Nat to have an outburst right now, so he pulled his hand back and settled it down on his lap.

In truth, Steve was feeling conflicted. On one hand, he was glad that Natasha was accepting even the smallest forms of affection or care from him. But then again, he felt that was somehow telling to how terrible Nat must be feeling right now. He decided he didn't want to prolong any of this anymore, especially in case there was something really bad going on. So he had Bruce paged and soon, Banner rejoined them in Natasha's room.

Steve was quick to counter Bruce's offer to talk in his office because that'd be too far from Natasha. Nat absolutely hated the medbay, so Steve hated the thought of leaving her alone even just for a moment when she's in such a vulnerable state. Luckily, Bruce easily agreed and they'd decided to just talk outside Natasha's room.

Nat didn't look quite pleased by that idea, so thinking that she was afraid of being left alone, Steve gave her a reassuring smile. "We'll just be right outside your door, okay?" He said in a soothing voice. He was still holding onto Natasha's hand, so he gave it a gentle squeeze and rubbed soothing circles with his thumb on the back of her hand. This comforted Daisy whenever she was afraid, so Steve hoped it would do the same for Nat. 

It seemed like it did, because Steve could see the tension leaving Natasha's shoulders. "If you need anything, just call out." He said gently.

"Okay." Natasha said softly. Steve wanted to stay with Nat, he really did. But he knew he had to tell Bruce what he learned already; and so he reluctantly stood up and left the room with Bruce. There were chairs by the door to Nat's room, so that was where he and Bruce settled down.

"I'm assuming she told you something, that's why you called me back." Bruce said, and Steve nodded in response.

"She told me she did take a pill this morning. I didn't get to ask though if it was the same pill in her jacket pocket, but based on everything else she said I'd presume that it was." Steve said with a frown.

Steve then proceeded to tell Bruce everything he knew: That the pills were supposed to stop Natasha from dropping, that this wasn't the first time she took the pills, but technically it also was because it was the first pill she took that she created too. Now when Natasha told him this, Steve was honestly surprised. He'd heard of Littles trying to suppress their Little sides, and he's heard news of unregistered companies trying to produce medication for that very purpose. Of course, all trial runs were failures with the Littles experiencing severe side effects--the worst of which being death.

That was why Steve wanted to talk to Bruce already. He wanted to make sure this was nothing like those trials they heard of in the news years back. If Natasha was telling them the truth though, she should've been experiencing negative side effects for a while now. Then again, what if that headache Natasha experienced was the start of it?

"It's for her drops, Bruce. She takes them so that she won't drop." Steve started to explain. "She says she's been taking them for a while now--the pills. But then she must have run out, so she tried to create her own batch. The pill she took this morning was of her own." When Steve said that, it suddenly occurred to him: Then why didn't Natasha just get another batch from her "supplier"?

Steve expected Bruce to be as surprised as he was, but Bruce just nodded his head almost solemnly: As if Steve just confirmed a particular hunch he already had.

"As I told you, I've had a hunch about Natasha for a while now." Bruce said. "I've never seen a Little successfully avoid dropping for as long of a time as Natasha has. Not to mention that Natasha's never even dropped in the first place. That alone was already a medical mystery." Bruce pointed out, and Steve frowned.

"So you've known for a while that she was probably taking something?"

"Known for sure? No I haven't. That she was taking something to stop her drops? Not that either. My initial thoughts were that she had something done to her... In the Red Room, maybe something irreversible." When Bruce said that, it was like everything clicked. That must have been where Natasha got her pills.   
"But agent May coming in with an unconscious Natasha changed that completely. Add to the fact that pill we found..."

"What did you find about the pill?" Steve asked.

"The most comfort I could provide is that I didn't find anything illegal on there." Bruce said as he tapped away on his tablet again. That did provide some relief, but the fact that that was the _most_ relief that Bruce can provide? Before Steve could ask more, Bruce held up his tablet in a way so that Steve could see too. On the screen, there were two brain scans side by side. Steve couldn't really understand what he was seeing, but just the fact that Bruce was showing him brain scans to begin with didn't bode well.

"After I ran the tests on the pill and found out what I did, I decided to do a little more research." Bruce explained. "I found several studies that covered Littles who avoided their drops, and this is what I found." Steve waited for Bruce to continue, but then he realized Bruce probably assumed he understood what he was looking at.

"What does this all mean?" Steve asked, though he was afraid of what the answer may be.

"This one here on the right is a brain scan of a Little who regularly drops. The one on the left is Natasha's." Bruce began to explain.

"That much I can gather, Bruce." Steve said, feeling a little exasperated. That was the most he could gather because the scans were labeled "Natasha" and "2013 study". "But why are you showing me the scans?"

"Well you see, this part of the brain," Bruce tapped something on the tablet and suddenly, the same area on both brains were circled in red. "You see how one color, particularly red practically overpowers everything else with Natasha?" Steve nodded his head. "That's not how it's supposed to be. If you look at these scans," Bruce tapped the scan on the right and another scan from a study of a different year replaced the previous image.

"All the colors are balanced. There might be a slight difference, sometimes there can be a little more red, other times yellow, but generally the difference isn't as big with Natasha's." Bruce continued to tap and tap and tap, showing Steve more and more scans. True enough, Natasha's scan did look alarmingly different.

"These colors represent different chemicals and chemical activities in the brain. Generally, each color is supposed to be confined to its own location in the brain, as we saw in the other scans. Occasionally, chemicals could get through their barriers and er, invade other areas." Bruce pulled up another scan, this one where there was a little bit of blue seeping into the yellow section.

"Now this is a normal occurrence, it happens with all Littles and is unavoidable. It's not alarming because the chemicals or activities could basically be pushed back into their own areas. What does that though--"

"are drops." Steve finished for Bruce, not being able to stop himself.

"Yes." Bruce nodded in confirmation. "When Littles drop, their brain produces this new chemical that acts somewhat like a bouncer: You know, making sure everyone's in their respective sections, bringing those who went out back to where they should be. Since Natasha's never dropped, the chemical activity in her brain, well... Let's just say that I'm honestly surprised that she's made it this far."

"But she's been taking those pills." Steve frowned.

"Mhm, but they aren't replacements to that special chemical, Steve. That chemical in Littles' brains can't be replicated. The most that those pills have been doing are probably numbing the side effects of not dropping. They may have helped slow down the deterioration, but..."

"So you're saying..."

"That if Nat doesn't drop soon and regularly, we're facing irreversible brain damage? Yes." Bruce said solemnly. "Especially now without her pills slowing down the deterioration, she really needs to drop. The sooner the better."

"She's not going to like this." Steve said. He could already hear Natasha complaining, coming up with any argument she can.

"I know she isn't." Bruce sighed. "But we have to try to make her understand."

Steve nodded his head at that. The thought of Natasha dropping should excite him, really. But if anything, Steve just felt nervous. Just for the shortest while, he believed that him and Natasha being heartmates was possible. What if once Nat drops, that isn't the case? Steve's back to feeling alone, to feeling that regret that maybe he left his heartmate back in the past.  
Then he realized how selfish he was being. This was Natasha's well-being they were talking about. Forget about his regrets and loneliness.

"Can I be the one to talk to Nat?" Steve asked.

"I was hoping you'd ask that." Bruce admitted with a small smile. "I can stay inside too, in case she has any questions. If you'd like."

"Yes, I think that'd be a good idea." Steve said. He took a moment to collect his thoughts, and he appreciated that Bruce didn't rush him. But they did have to be quick, so Steve took a deep breath and got up so they could head back inside. Luckily, Natasha was still in bed, sitting propped up against her pillows.

"Hi honey," Steve said with a soft smile as he sat back down on the edge of Natasha's bed, "how are you feeling?"

"I don't know." Natasha frowned as she looked at Steve, then at Bruce, then back at Steve again. "Am I... Are you... Do I have to leave?" Natasha asked, and Steve could hear how nervous she was and it broke his heart.

"No, you're not going anywhere. I promised you that, right?" Steve said soothingly, and Natasha nodded her head. "But there is something we want to talk to you about. It's about the pill you told me about." At that, Natasha visibly tensed up.

"I... It's nothing bad." Natasha insisted.

"Nat I know you think that, but Bruce ran some tests and we don't think it's safe for you to take those. Even the original pills." Steve said.

"No, you're wrong. When I, when my head hurts, or when I feel nauseous from stopping...it, the pills help the pain." Natasha argued, her forehead already scrunched up.

"That's the point though. The pills do nothing more than numbing that pain you feel." Steve explained, and then he looked back at Bruce who nodded his head in understanding. The man approached them and stood by the foot of Natasha's bed. Just close enough so Nat would be able to see what he'll flash on his tablet.

Steve then began to tell Natasha everything he learned from Bruce. He tried to lay it out as gently as he could, but even then he could see Natasha getting visibly upset. The only comfort Steve had was that she seemed sad, not mad. That at least meant she may be opening her mind up to the thought that they were right, right?

Once Steve was done explaining, with Bruce stepping in every now and then, Steve looked at Natasha to get a read on what she could be thinking. Usually, Nat would be so difficult to read, but right now her face seemed like an open book. His teammate, his friend, looked visibly troubled. Nat may be stubborn, but when she's presented with facts by Bruce, even she knew it was time to let the stubbornness go.

"So... I can't take them anymore?" Natasha asked softly.

"No honey." Steve frowned and shook his head. "And I know you don't want to hear this, but this also means that you need to drop." Natasha's head snapped up so fast to look at Steve, Steve was afraid she'd break her neck.

"I'm not doing that." She said firmly.

"Nat, you saw the scans, and I'm sure you understood everything Bruce explained." Steve said, knowing that Nat was one of the smartest people he knew next to Tony and Bruce. "This isn't really something we can avoid anymore."

"Just let me keep taking my pills then." She said, and Steve could see her eyes glistening with tears.

"I'm afraid we can't do that, Nat." It was Bruce who spoke up this time. "There may be no illegal substances in your pills, but ethically speaking we can't let you continue with this... Treatment." Bruce was right. Ever since the failed attempts of several companies to create a similar drug, the board of ethics banned all parties--be it corporate, independent, or government-led, from pursuing anything similar. The risks simply outweighed the potential benefits.

"This really is the only way." Steve said apologetically, and he scooted just a little closer to Natasha. "Nat, I won't be insisting if I didn't think it was really necessary." It was true though. Steve was one of the most understanding when it came to Natasha and her (lack of) drops. When people first learn that Nat's never dropped, they always try to convince Natasha to do so. Not Steve though. He just asked why she doesn't drop, and when he felt like Natasha was becoming uncomfortable with the topic, he stopped pushing.

"I don't want to go to the daycare." Nat said in a small, sad voice, and Steve frowned at that. If agents without heartmates or assigned caregivers drop in SHIELD, they're usually taken to the day care center.

"Who said anything about going to the day care, hm?" Steve asked. "I told you I'm not going anywhere, right? I'll stay with you the whole time." He said soothingly. He wanted to say more, but he didn't want to spook Natasha. It seemed like Nat was already considering dropping, and Steve didn't want to say anything that'd make them backtrack even the slightest.

Nat didn't seem to argue anymore either, so Steve sat there with a reassuring smile on his face. It looked like Nat tried to smile back but it looked more like a grimace than anything else. Natasha took a deep breath and closed her eyes first, and both Bruce and Steve stayed quiet. They waited for quite a while, but it didn't take too long.

It didn't take too long until Steve felt warmth spread in his chest, the weight on his shoulders suddenly lifted, and it was as if his mind was producing an abundance of dopamine or oxytocin--or whatever chemicals were responsible for making him feel this sudden gush of happiness. Steve's never felt this elated before, but he was quite sure about what it meant.

Just as Steve was taking that in, Natasha opened her eyes and a big smile spread on her face when she saw Steve. "Daddy!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for ending it there hehe. But I promise the next chapter we'll fill it with a lot of dropped Natasha lol.  
> Any guesses on what age she'll be?


	7. Chapter 7

"Daddy!" Steve could've sworn he felt his heart skip a beat when Natasha, _Little_ Natasha spoke. Once Nat called her daddy, all his worries were thrown out of the window: Tony (well, and the others) was right all along.

It was definitely shocking to see Natasha dropped. Initially, people wouldn't think that Littles would look any different from their aged selves when dropped. Well, they're wrong. It wasn't a major change, it wasn't that their features would suddenly appear more child-like, or that they'd suddenly get their baby teeth back. No.

It was more that you can practically see the innocence seeping back into their expressions: All the stress that adult life brought washed away for the moment. Natasha had that look right now, that innocent, child-like wonder in her eyes and Steve could honestly melt.

"Hi sweetheart." Steve all but cooed, his face hurting a bit from how hard he was smiling.

"Daddyyy!" Natasha practically squealed as she made grabby hands for Steve. Steve was a bit unsure as to how he should approach this, so he looked to Bruce for help. His friend nodded encouragingly so he turned back to Natasha and smiled.

"Mhm, that's right. Daddy's here." Steve said in a soothing voice as he reached out and carefully lifted Natasha onto his lap. Natasha, for her part, curled up in Steve's arms, resting the side of her head on Steve's chest. She sighed softly in what Steve assumed was contentment, and Steve smiled as he wrapped his arms protectively around the Little, around _his_ Little.

"She seems to be awfully young." Bruce commented softly, and he had a fond smile on his face too.

"You can say that again." Steve chuckled softly. He looked down at Natasha and smiled in amusement when he saw the girl put her fingers in her mouth to suck on.

"How do we determine her age?"

"Usually we just ask the Little." Bruce said. They've only had handful of agents who had their first drop while in SHIELD--well, technically they were in the academy still, but that was besides the point. And all those times, they simply just asked the Little because that was probably the most accurate they can get.

"I can run some tests, but that'd give us more of a range than an exact age, so I think it's best we just ask her."

Steve nodded his head and looked down at the Little in his arms. "Nat? Can you look at daddy for a moment, hm?" Steve asked, but Natasha didn't budge. She didn't even show any signs of hearing Steve.

"Nat?" Steve frowned.

Bruce tilted his head curiously, and then he looked like he had an epiphany. "Maybe she goes by a different name when dropped." Bruce suggested.   
"Skye likes to go by Daisy when she is." That wasn't a bad idea, so Steve proceeded to try and figure out what Nat liked to be called when dropped.

"Natasha?" No response. "Natalia?" Steve tried again, and still nothing. "Tasha?" That got the Little's attention. Nat--or rather Tasha, tilted her head up and smiled at Steve, her fingers still in her mouth.

"You like to be called Tasha, huh?" Steve smiled and tickled Tasha under her chin, causing the Little to erupt in a fit of giggles. It was the most adorable giggle Steve's ever heard.

"Tasha." Tasha confirmed, nodding her head once and smiling up at Steve.

"Tasha is a lovely name." Steve smiled and kissed Tasha on her forehead. "Can Tasha tell daddy how old she is?"

Tasha tilted her head slightly to the right, as if trying to comprehend what Steve was asking of her. "How old is Tasha?" Steve asked again, and the Little seemed to understand now.

"Dis many!" Tasha said proudly as she held up two fingers, and Steve was a little shocked. He already sensed that Natasha was on the younger side of the spectrum, but he's never encountered a toddler Little before.

"Wow! Two?! You're such a big girl, aren't you?" Steve exclaimed, and Tasha giggled and clapped her hands together in delight. Yup, definitely the most adorable giggle--no, the most adorable Little, Steve has ever encountered.

"Steve," Bruce snapped Steve out from his little trance of adoring Tasha and Steve hummed in response as he turned his head to look at Bruce. "I know you must want to take her back home now, but I think I want to keep her just for a little while longer."

"How come?" Steve frowned.

"I just want to make sure the drop's actually doing something for her brain." Bruce explained calmly. "We still also have to call agent Coulson to get Natasha's records updated."

"Yeah, okay then." Steve said softly before turning his attention back to Tasha, who was currently reaching up and trying to grab Steve's nose.

"I'll let you two get more acquainted for now. I should probably give it an hour or so before I do a scan." Bruce said. "I can have someone bring in some food for the two of you in a bit, it's almost lunch."

"Thank you Bruce, I appreciate it." Steve said gratefully with a smile, which Bruce returned with a nod before he left the two to give them some privacy while they bond.

"Why do you want daddy's nose, hm?" Steve chuckled as he tried to move his face away from Tasha's hands.

"Nose!" Tasha said as she put a hand over her own nose, and Steve smiled.

"That's right baby, that's your nose. Aren't you a smart one?" Steve practically cooed. "Where are Tasha's eyes?"

"Hewe!" Tasha said as she covered both her eyes with her hands, her r's evidently nonexistent.

"Oh no! Where's my baby Tasha?!" Steve gasped, and Tasha giggled, keeping her hands over her eyes. "Is sheeee... Here?" Steve said, tickling Tasha's side and effectively making her erupt in a fit of giggles.   
"Or is she here?" He asked as he tickled Tasha's tummy. Tasha lasted for a few more seconds before she most likely couldn't take it.

"Boo!" Tasha exclaimed as she uncovered her eyes, and Steve pretended to be surprised by Tasha's "appearance"

"Oh there you are! I thought daddy lost you!" Steve exclaimed as he pulled Tasha closer and held her comfortably tight.

"Tasha no go." Tasha smiled and shook her head. "Tasha stay wif daddy."

"Mhm, daddy would really love that." Steve said softly and she leaned down to kiss the top of Tasha's head. Steve was about to say something else, but then he felt Tasha nuzzling her face into his chest right where--oh, _oh._

"Oh Tasha, baby." Steve said with a slight frown as he tried to gently pull Tasha's face away from his chest. "Daddies can't really do that, baby. I'm sorry." Well this was a problem, or Steve hoped it won't be. Maybe once Tasha understands that he can't really breastfeed her, she'll forget about it?

Steve could almost feel his heart shattering into a million pieces when Tasha whimpered. "Are you hungry? Does Tasha want some milk or some yummies?" He asked as he gently brushed some hair away from Tasha's face.

"Nummies." Tasha whimpered before sticking her fingers in her mouth yet again.

"Uncle Bruce went away to get us nummies. Nummies will be here soon, baby." Steve said soothingly, but that didn't satisfy the toddler. Tasha whimpered and patted Steve's chest with her free hand.

"I'm sorry baby, but daddy doesn't have milk." Steve said apologetically, and his frown deepened. Was this the beginning of his being an inadequate heartmate for Tasha? He can't provide this one little thing, who knows what else he'll be lacking? The fact that Natasha didn't seem to understand him just troubled Steve even more. Natasha's lips were trembling and tears were pooling in the toddler's eyes.

"It's okay baby, it's okay." Steve cooed to his Little. "Daddy knows you're hungry, we'll be getting our nummies soon, I promise." Steve said, and Natasha just sniffled. Steve couldn't stand seeing his Little upset, so he carefully stood up with Tasha in his arms and started to gently sway.

Natasha held onto him tightly and hid her face in his neck. If this was any other situation, Steve would've found it adorable--ah, who was he kidding? It was still adorable, but he was more focused on soothing his Little right now.

He was still in the middle of feeling guilty about not being able to breastfeed Tasha when there was a knock on the door. He looked that direction and told whoever to come in: It was one of the nurses who had a tray of food in hand, and a bag slung over one shoulder. She greeted Steve and let him know that Bruce sent her with these items and then she was off once Steve thanked her.

"Look baby, your nummies are here." Steve gently patted Tasha's back to get her attention, and the toddler sat up in Steve's arms. She sniffled softly before turning her head to look at the bed.

"Baba." Tasha said in a soft voice as she leaned down towards the bed and made grabby hands for her bag. Steve had to hold on tight to make sure she didn't fall. He was confused at first, but then he saw the baby bottle in one of the side pockets.

"Does Tasha want her baba?" Steve asked as he reached out and took the bottle, but finding it empty. He sighed softly when Tasha whined and tried to grab the bottle. "Daddy will make your baba, but daddy has to put you down first, okay?"

"Otay." Tasha said sadly before sticking her fingers back into her mouth. Steve smiled sympathetically and kissed Tasha's forehead before gently setting her down in the middle of the bed. He then sat down as well and opened the bag to look for the milk: He found a water bottle, a container with baby formula, and _oh..._ Right, Tasha might actually need a diaper for all he knew. One thing at a time, Steve.

He took care of the bottle first, and he silently thanked Bruce for measuring out the formula already. All he had to do was fill the bottle with water and pour the formula in. He made sure the bottle was screwed shut before shaking it.

"Okay baby, lie down so you can have your baba." Steve said as he uncapped the bottle before helping Tasha lie down. He figured he can just change Tasha while she had her bottle.

Luckily enough, Tasha seemed to be eager to have her bottle so she lied down without a fuss. She whined slightly and pouted when Steve was taking too long, and he chuckled as he handed the Little her bottle. Tasha reached both hands up to hold it, but Steve held it for her for a little while at first too. Once he was sure Tasha would be okay, he let go and got everything else he'd need.

Steve realized he and Nat haven't really talked about this, if Nat would be comfortable with Steve changing her, or giving her baths, or all those other intimate tasks. Then again, they hadn't anticipated her to be a toddler. Steve kind of _needed_ to help her.

After convincing himself this was the right thing to do, Steve pulled down Tasha's pants and underwear. He folded them up and set them aside before grabbing the Sesame Street diaper and opening it up. Tasha seemed to be a little preoccupied with her bottle, so Steve just lifted Tasha's bum and legs by her ankles and slid the diaper underneath her. She didn't seem to mind, so Steve took that as a good sign and finished taping the diaper onto Tasha. If Steve initially thought Tasha couldn't get any cuter, well, he was wrong.

Tasha in just a shirt and diaper as she had her bottle? Probably even the most cold-hearted of people would coo at the sight. Also, now with her pants off and a diaper on, Steve could've sworn Tasha looked a little more relaxed. He wasn't going to bother with her pants anymore because he was sure they wouldn't fit over that diapered bum. Tasha seemed content like this anyway. He just fixed Tasha's shirt so the hem of it wouldn't be tucked into her diaper, before turning to fix his and Tasha's lunch.

In hindsight, maybe Steve should have started with lunch before giving Tasha her bottle, but it was too late for that now. He told himself he'll just keep it in mind for next time. Natasha meanwhile looked pretty content as she held her bottle with one hand, and one of her feet with the other.

Steve shook his head in amusement as he poured in some apple juice into the sippy cup that he found in the bag. Bruce had definitely thought of everything. He hoped he'd be this put together--or more, for Natasha too. His lunch was a burger just how he liked it, while Tasha's was a bowl of mac and cheese with some bacon bits. That seemed simple enough. He was in the middle of cooling Tasha's food when he heard the toddler whimper again.

When Steve looked over, he noticed that Tasha's bottle was empty but the toddler was still trying to get some nonexistent milk out of it. Steve smiled sympathetically and he reached over to help Tasha sit up.

"Daddy's got your lunch, baby. Do you want some yummy mac and cheese?"

Tasha sniffled and almost pitifully nodded her head in response. Nat hadn't eaten a proper breakfast so her hunger was catching up by now. She still had the bottle in her mouth, so Steve gently took it away, earning a little whimper from her but Steve quickly apologized. He made sure Tasha was settled properly against the pillows before he grabbed the bowl of mac and cheese and the spoon.

He thought of letting Tasha feed herself, he really did. But then he couldn't resist it and Steve ended up feeding the Little girl himself. He'd alternate between feeding Tasha and taking a bite of his own food, and he realized that was probably why Bruce gave him a burger; much easier to eat one-handed.

"Nummies!" Tasha said happily as she patted her tummy with her hands.

"Is Tasha's tummy happy?" Steve asked with a smile as he scooped up some more mac and cheese.

"Tummy happy!" Tasha confirmed. "Cheese s'petti yummy."

Steve chuckled at that and leaned down to kiss Tasha's little nose: He couldn't help it. His Little was just absolutely adorable. He smiled even wider when Tasha tilted her head up to kiss his nose too. Sure, that got some cheese on Steve's nose, but he loved it anyway.

When Tasha refused to take another bite, even after Steve pretended it was a train or airplane, he figured the toddler was finally full. He set down the bowl back onto the tray and grabbed the sippy cup.

"Juice p'eaaaase." Tasha asked sweetly as she made grabby hands for the cup.

"Well don't I have such a polite baby girl?" Steve smiled and gave Tasha the sippy cup of apple juice. Tasha smiled widely at the praise and held her cup with both hands.

"T'anchu!" Tasha said before taking a big sip.

Once Tasha was satisfied, Steve took a napkin and tried to gently clean Tasha's face. He half-expected the toddler to argue, but Tasha just smiled at him before letting out an adorable little yawn. Yeah, Steve should have saved the bottle for last.

"It looks like a certain baby girl is tired." Steve commented softly before throwing the used napkin into the bin.

"S'eepy baby." Tasha confirmed as she reached a hand up and tiredly rubbed her eye. Well, it seemed like naptime falls after lunch, then.   
"Daddy hugs?" Tasha asked in her small, hopeful voice as she looked up at Steve. And really, how could Steve say no to that?

"Mhm, lots of hugs." Steve smiled as he reached for his Little.

He scooped Tasha into his arms before carefully standing up and adjusting his hold on her. Steve silently thanked the gods that Natasha was quite small because she fit perfectly in his arms. Tasha seemed to think that too, because the toddler basically melted and wrapped her arms around Steve before sighing softly in contentment.

Since it seemed to help soothe Tasha earlier, Steve tried swaying with his Little again as he rhythmically patted her padded bum. It didn't take long for the toddler to fall asleep and soon, Steve was tucking her back into the middle of the bed.

He didn't want Tasha falling off in her sleep, so he got the extra pillows and placed them on either side of her. He should probably get a crib for his floor--and a whole lot of other baby furniture.

Ah crap, he was unprepared for having a toddler Little. Sam introduced him to the "world of online shopping" a couple of months back, but he wasn't really comfortable with the thought of buying Nat's things online. He wanted to be sure that he'll be getting the best for his Little. That, and Steve kind of liked the thought of going shopping with Nat, regardless if she was dropped or not.

Steve's thoughts were interrupted by a quiet knock on the door, and Steve called for whoever to come in. It was Bruce and trailing behind him was agent Coulson.

"Captain." Phil nodded in greeting.

"Phil." Steve walked over to shake Phil's hand. "You know you can always call me Steve." He said with an amused shake of his head.

"I know, it just feels so cool to call you captain." Phil said, looking quite pleased as usual and Steve had to chuckle.

"Has she been asleep long?" Bruce asked, and Steve turned his attention to Bruce.

"I've just put her down about five or so minutes ago." Steve said with a shake of his head. "Did you need her awake for this?" He asked, knowing Bruce was probably going to do the scans now, and that Phil was here to make the other steps to make necessary arrangements quicker.

"No, this should be fine." Bruce said as he got his equipment ready.   
"Was just looking forward to giving her a lollipop for being well-behaved, that's all." He said with a soft chuckle.

"While Dr. Banner is doing the scans, perhaps you and I can have a quick chat?" Phil suggested, and Steve turned his attention back to him.

"Yeah, of course." Steve nodded his head. "We can just sit at the table." He said, nodding to the little table on the other side of the room.

He didn't really want to leave in case Natasha woke up, and it wasn't like they were going to talk about anything that Bruce shouldn't know about. Phil readily agreed, so Steve walked over and took a seat at the table, with Phil sitting across from him.

"So, I hear Natasha's a two year-old." Phil said as he unlocked his tablet, and Steve nodded in response. "I've done a quick scan of our database, she's our first toddler Little in SHIELD _and_ the academy."

"Is that a bad thing?" Steve asked, his eyebrows furrowing together in concern.

"No I'm simply pointing out the facts, captain." Phil said with a reassuring smile. Steve saw Phil pull up Natasha's file before he continued.   
"You know SHIELD doesn't discriminate when it comes to Little ages. If anything, this is going to make Nat a star." When Steve didn't respond, Phil looked up and saw the confused expression on the captain's face.

"Like I said, first toddler. Bigs left and right are definitely going to trip over themselves to take care of her." Phil pointed out, and after giving it a little thought, Steve figured that much was true. Nat's toddler status at least explained why Bigs were so protective and gentler with her even when aged. What more when she's dropped?

"She might get overwhelmed though." Steve pointed out with a frown. He wasn't sure if Tasha was the shy type, but he had a feeling that once she ages and realizes what's up, Nat wouldn't appreciate that much attention on her. 

"I know." Phil said with a sympathetic smile. "Which is why dr. Banner and I discussed giving you two some time off as soon as possible. Time for the both of you to adjust to your new lifestyles and relationship."

"Time off?" Steve asked, his eyebrows shooting up.

"Don't act so surprised now. You know very well SHIELD gives new heartmates time off to become better acquainted." Phil said. He did recall the rest of his teammates getting 2 or 3 days off after they bonded with their respective heartmates. "We managed to get you and Natasha ten days off starting tomorrow."

"That's a lot of days." Steve said, unable to hide the surprise in his voice.

"Well, the length of the break depends on the age of the Little. You've probably just never heard of a break this long because, as I mentioned, first toddler Little napping right there on that bed." Phil said, and Steve looked over at Natasha. He did have one special Little. They haven't been together as heartmates for long--heck, it's only been an hour at most, but Steve knew he'd gotten incredibly lucky here.

"I'm sure you'd like to talk with Natasha first about how you'd want to spend your break." Phil broke Steve out of his thoughts.   
"But once you've decided, let me know. If we have any safe houses where you two want to go, we can easily arrange for you two to stay there if you'd like."

"That's great, I'll make sure to keep that in mind." Steve said gratefully.

"Now," Phil said as he pulled up another file next to Natasha's, "I'm sure you're well-aware that infant and toddler Littles are quite special cases. A lot of different government protocols are in place to keep them safe." Right, Steve needed to keep those in mind too.

"It's quite an extensive list." Phil said, and Steve saw him scrolling through the new document, presumably the list of protocols. Saying "quite an extensive list" was an understatement, in Steve's opinion.

"I know this looks overwhelming." Phil said with a sympathetic smile. "But I've read through this in the past as well. Majority really are just common sense, but I'll send this file to your email regardless." At that, Phil tapped on send and Steve felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Yup, Steve definitely had a lot of reading to do tonight.

"Protocols of immediate concern are on the first page, biggest one being she has to move in with you." Yeah, Steve's heard of that protocol before. It was a precaution because infant and toddler Littles were more prone to panic or accidental drops. The other Littles like Clint and Wanda, they still had their own apartments. But Natasha won't, not anymore. That's going to be a pleasant conversation.

"We also have standard-issued car seats and high chairs you can use, but I highly recommend you get her ones more fit for her." Phil said.   
"We also have other supplies you might need--diapers, bottles, milk. We can send a batch over to your apartment once we're done here."

"Yeah, I intend to go shopping for her." He was hoping he'd go shopping _with_ Natasha if she'd be open to it. If not, maybe he can ask Tony or Sam to keep an eye on her while he's away. "But again, thank you Phil."

"You're welcome." Phil smiled. "We want you two to be able to adjust to your new lives with ease."

"Is there any other urgent matter I need to take care of?" Steve asked. He was new to this whole heartmate thing so of course he was nervous about screwing up.

"Well, there is a matter of her Little ID. It needs to be updated as well and I'm not really authorized to do that. I can update all her other documents, but not that." Phil said.   
"We have an office for that on the third floor of building theta. It should be quick, but she needs to be present and dropped."

"Do I need to do that today?" Steve asked. He was hoping he could get Natasha settled first this afternoon, especially after the long day she had.

"Just make sure to have it done before the end of your break, or before you leave town if you intend on doing so." Phil said. He printed up a slip using his tablet and handed it to Steve.   
"Just present this at the front desk. It should fast track the process."

Steve felt like he was thanking Phil quite a lot, but the man was doing a lot for him so he figured it was warranted. As Steve kept the slip in his wallet, Bruce walked over to them and took a seat at the table. Bruce was smiling, so Steve took that as a good sign: an incredibly good sign.

"Her brain is on the mend. The drop's definitely helping." Bruce said with a reassuring smile. He pulled up his tablet and showed Steve Nat's brain scan. Sure enough, the colors looked more balanced than they had earlier.

"That's good then." Steve said, the relief evident in his voice. He even managed to sit back in his chair and relax just a little.

"Mhm, but Steve, we're still in the danger zone here." Bruce said gently, and in Steve's honest opinion, Bruce should have started with that.   
"She's on the mend, but to keep this up she also needs to drop regularly. She can't stay aged for more than 24 hours straight for now. And no resisting drops as that could cause even more damage. When she feels the urge to, she needs to drop."

"You're telling me that as if Natasha would readily accept it." Steve pointed out.

"She would if she cares about her own life." Bruce said gently, and Steve sighed. "And this 24-hour thing won't be forever. It's just until we're sure she's out of harm's way."

"Is there anything else I need to know?"

"You've seen Clint and the others control their drops easily, yeah? Dropping and then aging up on their own will." Steve nodded his head.   
"That doesn't come naturally. She'll have to learn that, but I wouldn't rush it, especially with her case. It might frustrate her, which is why I feel the need to bring it up."

"She may also feel a little more sensitive or emotional for a while." Bruce continued. Yeah, Bruce really should have started off with these parts.   
"It's normal for toddler and baby Littles after their first drop, so it's nothing we should worry about. She'll be back to her normal self after a few days." He said reassuringly.

"The more you talk, the more ill-equipped I feel about this." Steve said with a frown.

"Steve," Steve was so surprised that Phil called him by his first name, that he actually stopped panicking for a bit, "we've all felt inadequate or unprepared when we first bonded with our heartmates. I know this is a different case because, well, she's a toddler. But you and Nat aren't alone in this. You were there for us when we were struggling, so you bet we're going to have your back too."

"Yeah, c'mon Steve. You really think we're going to let you hog a toddler Little all to yourself?" Bruce teased, and Steve actually smiled.

"Clint was already begging to see Nat--and I'm sorry I told him." Bruce quickly added. "It's just, you know how Clint is with Nat. The moment he learned that you went here to see her, well... Tony had to physically restrain him. I had to explain what was going on so he'd understand that maybe now wasn't the best time for him to see Nat."

"It's fine, Bruce. Don't worry about it." Steve said with a small smile. Their words at least provided him some comfort. He knew he could count on his team, on his family, to help him and Natasha transition into their new lives.

"I'm sure Tasha will be excited to meet all her big brothers and sisters. And uncles and aunties." Steve added with a chuckle when Phil and Bruce glared at him playfully.

From there, the three of them had light conversation about their team's Littles. Mainly, Steve listened intently especially to Phil's stories. If he was going to be a good dad, he needed to learn all that he can. Phil and Bruce kept on assuring him though that he'll be fine. He was already slipping into the role nicely.

When Natasha started to stir about an hour later though, Bruce and Phil excused themselves to give Steve and Nat some privacy. Steve thanked them again profusely, and Phil updated Steve that the packages were already in his apartment, before the two left and Steve approached Nat's bed. By the time Steve got there, Nat was tiredly rubbing her eyes.

"Steve?" Nat asked tiredly as she pulled one hand away from her face.

"I'm right here." Steve said soothingly as he stood by Nat's bed and reached out to smooth back her hair.   
"How are you feeling?" As if on cue, a bright red blush made its way to her cheeks.

"I'm sorry." She said softly, avoiding any eye contact with him.

"What are you saying sorry for?" Steve asked as he carefully sat down on the edge of her bed.

"I don't know." Natasha admitted softly, and she still wouldn't look at him.

"Nat, listen to me." Steve spoke in a gentle voice.   
"You don't have to apologize for being Little. I know you think it's hard to believe now, but there's nothing wrong with it, okay? It's a normal part of you, and you need your drops. No one's holding it against you."

Nat frowned and bit down on her lower lip. She shifted slightly and blushed brighter as she pulled the blanket up a little higher. Steve was then reminded that Nat was still in just a diaper and shirt, probably needing a change, but now probably wasn't the right time to bring attention to that.

"So you really don't mind being my heartmate?" Natasha asked, sounding timid more than anything.

"You don't know how happy I was when I realized that we are." Steve smiled.  
"That was probably the happiest I felt in a long while." He said softly, and Natasha nodded her head. He barely heard it, but he heard the soft "me too" that came from Natasha.

"Bruce did a scan on your brain already." Steve said after a while. He figured he needed to let Natasha know already, and so he did. He told Natasha about the scan, how the drop improved the chemical balance and activities in her brain. He told her everything Bruce told him: How she needed to drop more regularly, how she could be a little sensitive over the next few days, all of it including some of the toddler protocols.

At some point, it occurred to Steve that maybe this was a lot to dump on Natasha all at once. But then again, he didn't want to hold anything back. Once he was done, he let Natasha mull over everything. It was quite a lot to take in.

"I feel so stupid" were the first few words Natasha muttered, and Steve frowned deeply.   
"How could I have trusted them? They took me from my parents and I just readily accepted every idea they planted in my mind." Steve knew by then Natasha was talking about the Red Room.

"You were just a little girl, Nat. An actual little girl." Steve said. "You were doing it to protect yourself. It's not your fault."  
The small comfort Steve got from this was that, well, at least Natasha seemed to be starting to resent the pill.

"Yeah, and look where that got me." She said tearfully, and Steve could see the tears building up in her eyes. Bruce was right with the heightened emotionality and sensitivity, that's for sure.

"Fuck, I'm so _stupid_." Nat muttered as she started to hit the side of her head with the heel of her hand out of frustration.

"Hey, hey none of that." Steve said in a gently firm voice as he reached out and held both of Nat's hands to stop her.   
"Honey I'm glad you're coming to realize how wrong that all was, but you need to understand that's not your fault, okay?" He said in a gentle voice. "You're not stupid. You're one of the smartest people I know."

"You're probably forgetting Bruce and Tony." Nat sniffled, and Steve chuckled softly.

"I did say _one_ of the smartest." Steve smiled.   
"I know this may all seem scary and new, but we'll figure everything out together, yeah?." He said softly. He let go of one of Nat's hands so he can reach out and wipe away the tear that went down her cheek with the pad of his thumb.

"Can I give you a hug?" Steve asked in a gentle voice after a while.

Natasha seemed to hesitate for a moment, but she eventually nodded her head and began to sit up. Steve helped her and proceeded to gently tug the Little into his arms, enveloping her in a tight, comfortable hug. He could feel the tension leave Natasha as she relaxed in his arms, and he kissed the top of her head before soothingly rubbing her back.

Nat had her face hidden in Steve's chest at first, but she eventually turned her head so she'd be facing the side. She didn't pull away yet though, so Steve didn't let go of her. He'd let her decide when she's had enough comfort.

"Are we allowed to leave now?" Nat asked softly, and Steve noted she asked about both of them, and not just herself. Maybe Nat was slowly coming to accept all the change after all.

"Mhm, I'll call Bruce so we can get you discharged." Steve said before kissing the top of Nat's head one more time.


	8. Chapter 8

It should have been a relief for Natasha; getting discharged with nothing more than a reminder to not resist her drops. After everything Bruce and Steve told her, she thought the damage was at a point of no return. So really, all this should have relieved her. 

Instead, she was nervous. 

Admittedly, her first drop was wonderful. She actually had fun interacting with Steve as a toddler, no matter how embarrassing that may sound. And when she woke up, she felt well-rested and... Peaceful. Probably better put, she felt refreshed. So why was she so nervous right now? 

Bruce had come in a few minutes ago to officially discharge her and now, she was in the en-suite bathroom to clean up and pull her pants back on. Yup, she woke up wet earlier and that had been terribly embarrassing. She hoped it wasn't something that she'd have to go through regularly. Then again, she's a toddler Little. She sighed and shook her head to herself as she pulled on her pants. But she's Steve's toddler Little. 

That both excited her and made her nervous. What if she can't live up to Steve's expectations? Steve was such a great Big, he definitely deserved the best Little there was. She still wasn't even so sure about this whole dropping thing. Maybe she could just roll with it until she's stable, and after that she should be able to stop her drops without an issue, right? 

Before Steve could get suspicious or worried about how long she was taking, she pulled herself out of the hole she was digging herself and exited the bathroom.

"You ready to go?" Steve asked with a smile when Natasha rejoined him. 

"Yeah, I guess." Natasha said. She glanced at Steve for a moment before looking down at her feet. She just felt a little embarrassed still. 

"We can drop by your place first," Steve said, "get your clothes and other belongings."

"That sounds good." Natasha nodded in response. She heard Steve sigh softly and she felt bad, but she wasn't sure why.

"Okay, let's go then." Steve said, and Natasha followed after him. On their way out of the medbay, Steve thanked Bruce once more, and so did Natasha. He bid the pair well and soon, they were making their way back to Natasha's apartment. 

"Am I really not allowed to keep my apartment anymore?" Natasha frowned. She was partly okay about moving in with Steve, but the thought that she didn't have a place to call just her own... It didn't sit well with her. 

It took a while for Steve to respond, as if he was thinking his answer through. In that time, he slowed down his pace a bit so he'd fall into step with Natasha. "Agent Coulson didn't explicitly say that you can't keep your apartment," Steve answered, "just that you have to move in with me." 

"So you think they'll let me keep it?" Nat chanced a quick look at Steve, and for a brief moment he looked hurt, but he quickly masked that expression. 

"We can talk to Coulson about it." Steve said. "For now, let's just follow the protocols so we can get on their good side too, yeah?" 

"Yeah, okay." Nat said softly with a shrug. She frowned to herself because she couldn't help but feel like she was doing a rough job as a heartmate. Now that they were officially bonded, Nat was more sensitive to Steve's emotions and vice versa. She knew her question had saddened Steve a little, but she meant nothing bad by it.

"Hey, it's not that I don't want to live with you." Nat said as they waited for the elevator to arrive. "I just, I don't know. I guess I need something to hold onto. Something from before all this, I guess. If that makes sense." 

"I understand." Steve said with a nod. "I'll talk to Coulson about it when this isn't so fresh anymore." He said, looking at Nat with a small smile, which Natasha returned. 

"Thanks Steve." Nat said as the elevator doors opened and they stepped inside.

"You're welcome." They rode the elevator in silence and soon enough, they arrived at Natasha's floor. Steve let her out first and she led the way to her apartment, with Steve following close behind. 

Walking in, she went to the living room first so Steve can have a place to stay. On the way, they passed the closed door to her personal lab. She was quite certain she'd been barred from entering that by now, but she told herself she didn't care. The pills she made were useless anyway--heck, the originals themselves were useless. 

"You can stay here while I pack." Natasha offered Steve, nodding to the living room where Steve can sit. "I don't watch much TV though, so I only have Netflix on there." She said as she grabbed the remote and offered it to Steve. 

"You sure you don't need my help?" Steve asked as he accepted the remote from Natasha. 

"I've got it covered, but thanks." Nat said with a small smile. Honestly, she just felt like she needed some time to herself. Steve seemed to pick up on that, so he just nodded his head and took a seat on the couch. Once Steve was settled, Nat turned around to leave him first so she can go to her room and pack up. 

"Nat, you don't have to pack everything today." Steve said just as Nat was about to exit the living room. "I'd rather you have more rest today. We can come back and pack up everything else another day." 

"Yeah, okay." Natasha nodded, even though she intended to pack most of her stuff already. She just needed the time, and she wasn't sure she could stand another session of packing up and leaving her apartment. 

Finally, she got to her room and closed the door behind her. She pressed her back to the door and slid down to the floor, bringing her knees up to her chest. Nat took in a deep, shaky breath as she hid her face in her knees and willed herself not to cry. Nothing she went through warranted a cry. Yes, it was frustrating, but Nat didn't think it'd be something she'd cry about. 

But then there she was: The dam broke and she just broke down in silent tears. She was glad that Steve agreed to let her pack up by herself, because she definitely didn't need an audience for this. Though if she was being honest, having Steve around for this sounded comforting. Gods what was wrong with her?

This was all just a big change and it frightened her greatly. It frightened her more than most of her missions. This was her personal life she was talking about, her life in SHIELD, her life with her team. What if she messed this all up? This thing she had in the compound, no matter how weird or complicated, it's home, it's family. She can't screw this up.

A good five minutes was spent that way with Natasha in tears, curled up into herself on the floor by the door. That was all the wallowing she would allow herself, so she hoisted herself up onto her feet, sniffling a bit as she did. Tears were still going down Natasha's cheeks, but she ignored them and started packing up already.

As much as Natasha tried to prolong her packing, she didn't need more than 30 minutes. She didn't really have that much personal clothes, most of her clothes consisted of her uniform and other standard SHIELD-issued outfits. Whenever she went undercover and had to buy specific outfits, she'd usually get to keep them, but she hardly did since they weren't much her style. Wanda would often bug her about a shopping trip, but Nat wasn't really that kind of girl. 

Most of her belongings fit into two duffel bags already, shoes included. Not to prolong this any further, she shouldered her bags and went back out. 

"Hi honey, you all ready to go?" Steve asked when Natasha re-entered the living room. 

"Mhm, I'm ready." Natasha said softly with a small smile and Steve then turned off the TV. When Steve stood and stepped closer to her, Nat could sense some concern in his eyes. Maybe she should have washed her face or something before going out. She didn't really want to talk about her emotions right now (primarily because she found them silly), so she was glad when Steve didn't say anything.

Instead, Steve just walked over and gently pulled her into his arms. Initially Natasha tensed up, but only because she wasn't so used to the affection. Eventually, she found herself relaxing in Steve's embrace.

"I won't probe," Steve promised softly, "but if you ever want to talk, you can always come to me." He said before kissing the top of Natasha's head. 

"I know. Thanks, Steve." Nat said before sighing deeply. She allowed herself to bask in the comfort for a while longer before hesitantly pulling away. "I'm ready to go." She said with a nod.

"Here, I can bring your bags." Steve said as he offered to take them, but Natasha shook her head.

"It's fine, I got them."

"Let me take at least one." He said with a small smile, and Natasha couldn't really say no, so she nodded and handed Steve one of the bags. "If you realize you forgot something, we can always come back." He promised as he put a hand on the small of Nat's back to guide her out. 

Steve seemed to be a bit more gentler now, but Nat chose not to dwell on it. She walked with Steve so they can take the elevator to the floor of Steve's apartment. When they got to Steve's apartment, Natasha noticed that his place was considerably homier than hers, and it felt safer for some reason. If Steve saw Natasha smiling to herself, he chose not to bring attention to it and instead showed Natasha to her room. 

Well, she supposed it was her room now. It was one of the two guest rooms Steve had in case any of the team wanted to sleep over, especially the Littles. "We can paint your room another color if you like, and we'll get you more things too." Steve said as he let her in.

"No it's okay, we don't have to do that." Natasha said with a shake of her head. She set down her bag on the bed and looked around. She never really stayed here before, so the environment was still new to her. 

"I know we don't have to, I just want to." Steve shrugged and set down the bag he was holding. "This is your room, and your home as much as mine now. I want you to feel like it is." 

Natasha couldn't really argue against that, so she smiled lightly and nodded her head. A home with Steve, that sounded nice. 

"I'll let you unpack and rest up first." Steve said after some time. "If you need anything, I'll be in the living room or kitchen." 

"Alright, thanks Steve." Natasha said with a small smile, and Steve smiled back before turning to leave. 

Once Steve was gone, Natasha sighed softly and moved to her first bag, deciding to get started on unpacking. There wasn't much stuff, but she wanted to get it out of the way. As Natasha unpacked her bag, she came across her charger and remembered that her phone had been dead for a while now, so she quickly plugged it in before resuming her work. 

A couple of minutes later, her phone turned on and notifications kept popping up. Natasha initially intended to ignore it, but when she counted more than five she shook her head and stood up from her spot on the floor in front of her cabinet. Upon picking it up, she found that all notifications were of messages from Clint. She read through the messages and every single one went along the lines of "how are you", "what happened", or "call me when you're out", or "are you still alive". 

Natasha could practically feel Clint's worry, so she decided to text him back already. 

"Hi. I'm fine. Got discharged already, yes I'm alive." Nat texted back, and she got a reply not one minute later.

"Jeez, spare me the details that was such a lengthy text." Clint had replied, and Natasha received a second message immediately after that. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I don't know" Natasha responded, because that was always her response to that question. Clint was obviously used to that now, and he knew that meant Natasha really actually did need someone. That being said, seconds later Natasha's phone was ringing. 

"You didn't have to call," was the first thing Natasha said upon picking up the call. 

"Well you were being all vague again and I thought we were improving on that." Clint said. "How're you?" 

"I'm... Okay, I guess." Natasha sighed as she plopped down onto her new bed, lying down with her legs dangling off the edge. 

"You guess?" Natasha could practically hear Clint raising his eyebrow. 

"I don't know, it's complicated." 

"You know it takes a lot more than that to scare me away from what's bothering you." Clint pointed out, and Natasha knew he was right. No matter what issues she threw at Clint, he was always there for her. 

"I know, It's just, I don't know if this is something we should talk about over the phone." 

"How come? Do you want me to come over to your place?" Clint asked. Natasha saw that coming and even then, she didn't have a ready response.

"I'm... Not at my place." 

"What?" Clint asked in a confused tone, and with perhaps an equally confused expression. "But I thought you said you were discharged? Natasha Romanoff do not tell me you went out to work again just after you've bee--"

"I'm not working!" Natasha cut off Clint's sermon. "I'm at Steve's." She said softly. 

"Ah, that's right he did come for you." Clint said. Thanks to her training, Natasha could feel the disappointment and offence in Clint's tone, as if he felt that he should have been the one called. That was against protocol though, for medical emergencies you always call the Little's Big, or as close as you could get.  
"How about tomorrow then? I can come over and make us some lunch after our training." Clint said, and Natasha bit back her groan because of course Clint would still insist.

"Or we can eat out." Natasha suggested, hoping she'd avoided the situation.

"Oh come on, I'll make you my famous paella. I know you love that." Nope, the situation is still definitely hot. 

"I don't want to bother you, it's fine. We can eat out." 

"What's wrong?" Clint asked. "You've never said no to my paella before." 

"Why do you want to have lunch at my place so badly?" The moment the words left Natasha's lips, she regretted it. She knew she sounded a little too defensive. 

"Because I want you to have a homecooked meal. Save for team breakfasts, you almost always eat out." Clint explained calmly. "Nat, what's really going on?"

Nat thought about how to answer Clint's question for a bit. Eventually, she accepted that there was no point in trying to hide the truth from Clint. Evidently, it couldn't wait until they saw each other in person either. Clint was bound to find out about her drop within the day, she was sure about that. News about Little statuses traveled fast in SHIELD: What more since she's the first toddler Little? 

"I'm staying at Steve's for a while." Natasha said softly as she moved to lie down on her side and pulled her legs up onto the bed. 

"But you're okay, right? How come you have to stay at hi--"

"Clint I dropped." Natasha said it before she could convince herself otherwise. There was a long pause on Clint's end, but when Clint spoke again Nat had to give him credit for keeping his voice even and calm.

"Oh, oh. Well, okay now I get why you wanted to wait until we see each other before you told me." Clint said. "This is, wow. How are you holding up? Wait--if you're staying at Steve's, does this mean..?" Clint didn't finish his question, but Natasha understood what he meant.

"Yeah, yeah we are." Nat said softly, and she had a small smile on her lips.

"I knew it!" Yeah the coolness in Clint's voice was gone. "Nat! This is great! I'm so happy for the both of you, gods."

"We're not gods, Clint." Nat said in her attempt at a joke, and Clint just snorted. "And I'm fine, I guess. I don't know, it's all just confusing." She admitted.

"It really is at first, but it just gets better. I promise." Clint said in such a reassuring voice that Natasha wanted to believe him. "But hey, you know you don't really have to stay at Steve's forever. I still stay at my place, I only really hang out at Tony's mostly when I'm dropped. Only toddler and baby Littles have that rule where they have to move in with their Bigs, I think."

The fact that Clint didn't even consider the possibility that she was a toddler Little gave Natasha some mixed emotions. So does that mean fate made some mistake? She never really pegged herself to be a toddler either. She always suspected she'd be around the same age as Clint, if not, around 9 at the youngest. Definitely not two. 

"Yeah, I know." Natasha said, and there was another pause. Nat didn't know how to straight up tell Clint that she was a toddler Little, so she'd let him piece it all together.

"So, I'm guessing that rule applied to you, then?" Clint asked softly after a while.

"Sadly." 

"Jesus, Nat." Clint whispered. "How old are you?" 

"About two." Natasha muttered as she reached a hand up and massaged her temples. 

"You know, I'm trying really hard not to use any expletives, but you're making it difficult." Clint said with the softest of chuckles. "That's quite an adjustment you guys have to make, Nat. How are you really feeling?" He asked in a gentle voice. It was a tone Clint really reserved only for her, when he went on (to Nat's annoyance) protective big brother mode.

"Like crap as usual." Nat said, because the past few hours have been quite a rollercoaster ride. "Clint, I'm going to fuck this up." 

"Trust me, if there's one thing that's impossible to fuck up, it's being a Little." Clint said. "What are you worried about?" 

Steve, that was what Natasha was worried about. She was afraid that she'd disappoint Steve, that she wouldn't be the heartmate that he deserved. Steve's had so much experience in being a caring Big and here he gets a toddler who probably doesn't know how to be a toddler in the first place. 

"Nat, you still there?" Clint spoke, snapping Natasha out of her thoughts.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm just a little tired." Natasha lied. She just wasn't ready to talk about all this yet, if at all. "Can we continue this another time? I think I'm going to get some sleep, if that's okay."

"Of course, I'm sure you need all the rest you can get." Clint said. "You get some sleep, and we'll talk about this another time, yeah?"

Even though Natasha felt uncertain about that, she said okay anyway and said goodbye to Clint before hanging up. After a few minutes of moping around, Nat decided to finish unpacking and she did so with relative ease. It wasn't much of a challenge given the amount of clothes she brought over. Now she was just siting back down on her bed, thinking of her next move.

As much as she wanted to hide from Steve out of embarrassment, Nat knew she couldn't avoid him forever. So instead of prolonging her agony, Natasha decided to get up and see if she can help out with anything. She could at least be helpful since this was her home now too, right? Natasha sighed to herself and decided to woman up, getting up from her bed and going out to find Steve.

She eventually found Steve in the kitchen, he had his back to her and was taking out some ingredients and utensils. Natasha was about to make her presence known, but then Steve spoke up.

"I know, I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you, I promise." Steve said, and Natasha frowned to herself. She looked closer and saw that Steve had his earpiece in, so he was most likely talking to someone on the phone. 

"I just can't tomorrow night, something came up." Steve said, and there was a long pause before he spoke again. "It's a private matter, Tony. Stop being so dramatic, I'm not saying no. I'm just saying not tomorrow night." And there was another pause as Tony responded.

"I know I promised." Steve sighed as he started washing the vegetables in the sink. "But this is important, Tony. I can't really tell you my exact reason, but I promise I'm not just ditching you."

It didn't take much for Natasha to figure out what was going on. Steve probably had some date with Tony tomorrow, and now Steve can't make it because he had to stay with her. Her emotions were conflicting because on one side, she felt touched that Steve was putting her first, but at the same time the guilt was eating her up. Everyone knew how crazy Tony and Steve were about each other. She didn't want to be the one to get in the middle of all that. 

_Steve_

After some more reassurances from Steve, Tony finally calmed down enough and they agreed to reschedule their dinner plans (some may call it a date, but Steve didn't want to give it a label, he supposed. Plus, Tony called it dinner too). Of course Steve knew Tony believed him immediately and the man was just being his hyper-verbal self but hey, Steve somehow found it charming. 

Once he'd hung up the call, Steve was made aware of a certain presence behind him. He would have been alarmed, but luckily he remembered that Natasha was with him now.

"Hey, Nat." Steve said with a smile as he turned around to look at her standing in the doorway. "You done unpacking?" 

"You can go tomorrow." Nat said instead of answering his question. Steve was initially confused, but then it clicked: Nat must have heard his side of the phone call. 

"I'm not going tomorrow, I already told Tony we'll reschedule." Steve said. Really, it wasn't a big deal. Sure, he was looking forward to the dinner with Tony. As much as he liked Tony's company though, the feeling of finally finding your heartmate got that utterly beat, and Steve knew Tony understood that. Natasha on the other hand, was another case. 

"I'll be fine on my own for a couple of hours." Natasha insisted. "I've been on my own since I was a kid, Steve. One night's not going to kill me." 

Steve sighed and shook his head. He knew it'd take Natasha a while to understand what this heartmate connection really meant, but Steve's patient. And he wants more than anything for this to work, so he was going to make it work. Steve dried his hands and approached Natasha, gesturing for him to follow her so they can sit down at the dining table instead. 

Natasha silently followed Steve, who sat down at the head of the table and Nat sat to his right. Steve just studied Nat for a few moments as he thought of the right words to say. He was not going to fuck this all up. 

"I don't think skirting around it is healthy, so I'm going to say it now, okay?" Steve spoke after a while, and Natasha gave no response, but she didn't protest either so Steve continued.

"We're heartmates now, and Nat I know it might take some time, but I want you to believe me when I say that you come first with me now, okay? You're my top priority." Steve said gently, and he paused for a bit before continuing. "You'll always come first, and it's not just because I need to put you first, it's because I want to put you first. I've worried for so long that I've lost my heartmate by putting myself in the ice, so when this happened... Nat, this means a lot--you mean a lot to me." 

"I always wondered what my heartmate would be like." Steve continued softly when he realized Natasha wasn't going to speak. "And now that I know, well, the reality's a lot better than everything my mind came up with." He said with a smile, and that got Natasha to finally look up at him. She had a slight frown on her face, but she looked more curious than sad. 

"We haven't even been heartmates for long. How sure are you about that?" She asked softly. 

"136.75%." Steve said, and Natasha gave him an odd look which he figured was warranted. "But I mean it, Nat. You're really important to me--you were important to me before this all happened, and this just strengthened that feeling even more. "

"You come first, and I know these first few days are going to be a bit off so I want to be here for you the entire way." Steve continued to explain in a gentle voice. 

"I can do it, handle it by myself." Nat said, and Steve shook his head.

"Just because you can, doesn't mean you always should." Steve said. "And I think this transition's one of the things you shouldn't, honey." He said gently. It'll definitely take Natasha a while to be more accepting of all the comfort and attention, but Steve knew they'll get there. 

"Do you want to tell me what's on your mind?" Steve asked softly after a while, and he saw Natasha hesitate, but she thankfully spoke up. 

"I just, I don't know how to be a Little." Nat said with a frown. "I want to try to be a good heartmate for you, but I feel like I'll just mess things up." 

"You don't have to worry about that." Steve was quick to reassure. "Honey I promise, you're all I'll ever want and need in a heartmate. There's nothing you need to do to make that feeling stay, because I'm here to stay. I'm here for you, okay?" 

Steve had a hunch that part of Natasha's worries is that he'll leave her if she's not "good enough", because honestly he had those feelings about himself too. He knew it was normal in a heartmate relationship for the two to have doubts on being able to do their part to keep the bond alive. That didn't mean Steve was okay with Natasha feeling that, though. He wanted the best for his Little, and that included as little insecurities about herself in their relationship as possible. 

"Yeah, okay." Natasha said softly, and Steve gave her a reassuring smile. 

"Hey, I've been thinking of something while you were unpacking." Steve said, and Natasha looked up at him again. "It's just a suggestion, you can say no if you don't want us to do it." 

"What is it?" Natasha asked.

"Well, now that you can be a little girl all over again, how about we make a list of things you never got to do before?" Steve suggested. He wanted to get Natasha comfortable with her Little side, and he was hoping that them talking more and more about it would help. Plus, this meant good bonding time with her. 

"We can go through that list whenever we want to have some fun--we can even go through some of the items during our break." Steve smiled. "What do you think?" 

"I... Are you sure?" Natasha frowned.

"Mhm, you deserve a good childhood, Nat. And I know I can't give you an actual childhood, so I hope I can give you the next best thing." He said softly and a bit shyly. Steve waited for Natasha's response, but instead, Nat started to blink rapidly, as if trying to fight back her tears. That got Steve worried.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Steve asked in a gentle voice. "Was it something I said? I'm sorry, Nat. I didn't mean to make you upset." Maybe he shouldn't have brought up Nat's childhood.

"No, it's not that." Natasha shook her head and reached up to rub one of her eyes in frustration. "It's just, no one's cared so much about me like this. I'm sorry, it's stupid." That gave Steve some form of relief--okay, so he didn't hurt Natasha's feelings. But that also slightly broke Steve's heart to hear. 

"Honey it's not stupid." Steve said reassuringly. He pushed his chair back and turned in his seat before leaning forward and carefully pulling Nat's chair closer to his. "Nat, honey, look at me." Steve said gently as he turned Natasha's chair to face him. 

Natasha, for her part, sniffled and hesitated but she eventually did look up at Steve. No one would have guessed this was one of SHIELD's top agents. Right now, Natasha just looked so vulnerable and innocent, Steve just wanted to pick her up and hug her. Her eyes were all glossy with unshed tears, and her cheeks were a light pink from blushing. 

"What you're feeling isn't stupid, okay? It's normal to get overwhelmed, especially now. I know this feels like a big change, so when you're feeling things, you don't need to hide them, okay?" Steve said as gently as he could. "You don't need to hide your feelings, especially from me, because your feelings aren't stupid." 

"And we've always cared about you, Nat. I've always cared about you." Steve continued in his soothing voice. "Why do you think we keep trying to fuss over you, even though you always end up brushing us off?" He asked with a soft chuckle. It was true though, the team would often try to check up on Natasha and make sure she's okay. Steve was the one who did it the most, though. Even agents outside their team have this inclination to be caring towards her. Now that Steve knew Nat was a toddler Little, that made much more sense. 

"I don't know," Nat said softly, "maybe you're all just stubborn?" She said, and Steve chuckled and shook his head in amusement.

"Well, partly yes." He said with a small, amused smile. "But I'm sure deep down, you've always known that we care, Nat." He said softly. 

"I'm sorry if we didn't get to express it as much as we do with the others." Steve apologized. "And no, it's not your fault for trying to stop us. We're the Bigs, and you're a Little. We should have tried harder to get to you, and I'm sorry we didn't."

"It's, it's okay." Nat said softly as she blinked rapidly once more. She cast her eyes down and just looked at her lap.

"Come here, can I give you a hug?" Steve asked in a soothing voice as he held his arms open. Natasha didnt even hesitate this time, she just sniffled and shyly nodded her head before leaning forward.

Steve smiled at that and wrapped his arms around Natasha. When he did though, the dams broke and Natasha broke into tears. Bruce definitely wasn't kidding about the emotional first few days.

"It's okay honey, I'm right here." Steve all but cooed as he rubbed Natasha's back. "I know it can be overwhelming, it's okay. Just let it out." He said softly. A few moments later Steve couldn't take it anymore: He pulled back a bit, but only so he could lift Natasha up onto his lap. He sat her down straddling his lap and facing him. There was a slight blush on her tear-stained cheeks, but Steve just smiled reassuringly at her and tugged her back into a hug.

Nat seemed to relax in Steve's arms as she rested against him and continued crying softly. Steve just held her and let her cry it all out, whispering soothing words into her ear as he rubbed her back and gently rocked Natasha. 

"How are you feeling?" Steve asked softly a few minutes after Natasha's cries were silenced.

"I'm okay. I'm sorry." Natasha said, and Steve could practically feel her frown. Steve's heart swelled a little though when he realized Natasha wasn't pulling away still. She was still laid against Steve, her head on his shoulder.

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize for having feelings." Steve said before kissing the top of Natasha's head. Steve looked down at Nat before reaching into his pocket to grab his handkerchief to wipe Nat's face with.

"You want us to make the list, or should we make dinner instead, hm?" Steve asked gently as he wiped Natasha's face.

"I'm not really hungry yet." Natasha said softly, letting Steve clean her face without much fuss.  
If this was Nat's way of telling Steve she wanted to make the list, he'll take it.

Steve wasn't really willing to let go of Natasha yet, so he just fixed the way he was holding Nat so she wouldn't be hiding anymore before taking out his phone. "You okay here?" He asked. If Nat wanted off his lap, that was fine with him. He didn't want to make Natasha feel uncomfortable.

But to Steve's surprise, Natasha nodded her head. She blushed a deeper red, but she nodded nonetheless, so Steve smiled and kissed Natasha on her forehead. He was going to shower Natasha with as much love as she'd let him.

So that's how they sat for a good hour or so; together in the dining room as they came up with several things they could do together when Nat's dropped. They even came up with a few to do when she's not. Needless to say, the two of them had quite the list once they felt they've exhausted all ideas so far. Steve assured Natasha they could always come back to the list whenever either of them thought of something, and Nat was happy with that. She was actually smiling by the end, and that made Steve smile too.

"Some of these we can do during our break." Steve said as he scrolled through their list. "You have any ones in particular you want to do first?" He asked as he looked down at Nat.

"Maybe the playground? That's easy enough since we have one here." Natasha said, and Steve nodded. He marked the playground on their list.

"What else? It doesn't have to be near here, honey. Whatever you want, we'll try to make it happen." 

"Um, the petting zoo?" Nat said, but it came out more like a question. 

"That's a good one." Steve smiled and marked the petting zoo too. "What else?"

"How many are we doing?" Nat asked, sounding a bit surprised.

"Well, we have a few days off." Steve chuckled. "I intend to spend every one of them with you. How about you pick two more, and we can improvise the rest?" He didn't want to overwhelm Nat again, so he figured they can stop at 3 for now.

"Okay, maybe the water park and beach?" Nat said before turning her head to look up at Steve. 

"Alright, we'll do those too." Steve smiled and marked those two before turning back to Nat. "Do you want it to be just us two, or do you want the others to come?" He asked softly.

Steve would be okay either way, but he wanted to know what Nat wanted. He knew they could bond as heartmates regardless if they're alone or not, but he figured Natasha might do well to have some family time too.

"I... I don't know." Nat frowned. 

"Okay, that's okay, you don't have to decide on it now." Steve said soothingly and he started to rub Natasha's tummy. "Think about it more, and let me know. But if you want to talk to me about it too, that's also fine."

"Yeah, okay." Nat said with a nod.

And that was how the two of them planned out their little break. Steve still had to talk to Phil for some arrangements, and clear the team's schedules just in case. But he's got that handled. He and Natasha stayed snuggled up for a while more, but they eventually decided to get dinner started.

Of course with Nat now staying with Steve, he was going to make sure she ate well, and she did. Steve made her a healthy home cooked meal and afterwards, they decided to watch a movie in the living room. It didn't even take long before Steve had his arm wrapped around Nat as she snuggled up to his side. Steve can definitely get used to all of this.

It was half past ten when Steve looked down at Nat, only to find her sleeping soundly next to him. Steve smiled fondly because she did look quite adorable, and he would hate to wake her. So he didn't, he just carefully gathered Natasha into his arms and stood up, making sure not to jostle Natasha too much.

He carried Nat into her bedroom and pulled back the covers before carefully laying her down in the middle. She surprisingly stayed asleep the whole time, even as Steve tucked her in and kissed her on the forehead.

"Good night, Nat." He said softly with a small smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry there's no Tasha in this one huhu  
> Next one will have a bunch hehe
> 
> Happy 2020, everyone!


	9. Chapter 9

_Steve_

The next morning, Steve woke up earlier than usual, and that was probably a good thing: As soon as he opened his eyes, he realized he'd forgotten to cancel team breakfasts for the time being. Even though Steve believed a team breakfast would benefit Natasha, now probably wasn't the right time. Her first drop was still fresh, and he hadn't asked her if she was okay with having the team around. That being said, the first thing he did upon getting up was to send a message to the team, apologizing and saying that there was no breakfast today.

Unsurprisingly enough, most of them had already figured that out because they've already heard the news about Natasha. Sure, a lot of them were disappointed because they were hoping to see Nat dropped too, but they also respected their friends' privacy, and understood their need for some time alone.

 _"That was easier than expected,"_ Steve thought to himself, " _too easy."_ But Steve brushed it off and just pulled on some pants so he can get out and get started on breakfast.

On his way to the kitchen though, he decided to make a quick stop at Natasha's room. Now, it may have been a smidge too overprotective of Steve to check on her like this, but to hell with it. He was an overprotective heartmate, Steve wasn't going to deny that; and he was glad that he was.  
Upon entering Natasha's room, Steve could immediately sense that something was off--it was the smell. Steve frowned to himself as he looked around the room to find the source of the smell, and eventually narrowed it down to the small heap in the middle of the bed.

Stepping closer to the bed, Steve could tell that Natasha was still asleep, which was great because she needed the rest. What worried Steve was the state of Nat: She'd kicked off the covers in her sleep and was currently curled up on her side, but what got his attention was the large wet spot underneath Natasha's lower half. The girl had wet the bed in her sleep.

Steve's never heard of Natasha having these kinds of issues (but then again, there was probably a lot they didn't know about Natasha), so he could only assume that she'd dropped in her sleep last night. It looks like the great start to the day was short-lived, because this was definitely going to dampen Natasha's spirits.

He didn't really want Natasha staying there any longer, so he bent down and tried to gently shake Natasha awake.

"Natasha, Nat, wake up honey." Steve said softly, earning a groan and a few Russian curse words from Nat. Definitely not dropped, then.

"Nat you need to get up." Steve said as he tried to brush some hair away from Nat's face.

"What time is it?" Natasha asked as she reached a hand up to tiredly rub her eye.

"It's still six," again, more Russian curse words, "but I think you'll want to get up." He said tentatively.

"At six AM?" Nat groaned. She sounded tired, but Steve could also hear the disbelief in her tone.

"You had a little accident, honey. I think you need to go and clean up." Steve said as gently as he could.

He watched as a frown formed on Natasha's face before her eyes snapped open and cheeks blushed a bright pink.

"Shit, _shit."_ Natasha muttered as she hastily grabbed the blanket and pulled it back up to cover herself. "Shit, I'm sorry Steve. I don't know what happened, this never, I never-- _shit._ I'm sorry, I'll clean this up, I promise. I'm sorry." Nat rapidly shot the words out that Steve had to take a moment to register them.

"Hey, hey it's okay." Steve spoke soothingly as he crouched down by the side of Nat's bed. "I'm not upset, I know it was just an accident."

"This never happened before, I swear." Natasha said tearfully, and Steve believed her.

"I believe you." Steve said softly. "It might have something to do with your drops. Bruce said you won't be able to control them at first, it isn't your fault."

When that realization dawned on Natasha, her expression quickly changed from upset, to frustration, and then... Nothing. Steve had to hold back a sigh when he figured Natasha was probably holding back her emotions again.

"Why don't you go and clean up in your bathroom?" Steve suggested gently. "I'll take care of the bed, okay? Don't worry about it, it isn't your fault, Nat." He said reassuringly.

Natasha nodded her head but she didn't look like she believed him, but she got up anyway and silently climbed out of bed. She kept her head down as she grabbed some clothes from her closet before making a mad dash for the bathroom. Steve winced when the door practically slammed shut behind her.

Steve took a moment to close his eyes and take a deep breath, still crouched down by Natasha's bed. He knew Nat couldn't control her drops yet, he should have thought about her dropping in her sleep. If only he'd anticipated this and changed Natasha into a diaper before tucking her in, maybe this could have been avoided.

 _"It's just a minor hiccup, Steve. You can do this."_ Steve thought to himself before finally standing up.  
He surveyed the damage before going back out to get the cleaning supplies from the hall closet. Once he had everything he needed, he went back to Nat's room to clean up her bed and replace the sheets. It took quite a while, but Steve eventually deemed the bed thoroughly clean.

After packing everything back away into the closet, Steve was supposed to go into the kitchen to make breakfast already. Then he realized Natasha's been in the bathroom for quite a while now. Part of him told himself to let Natasha be, but then he reminded himself his overprotectiveness was _technically_ justified now: They're heartmates, after all. He's supposed to make sure she's fine, right?

It didn't take long for Steve to convince himself it was okay to check on Natasha again, so he went back to her room and knocked on the door to her bathroom.

"Nat? You okay in there?" Steve asked, but he got no reply. "Nat?" Still nothing.

"FRIDAY, is Natasha still there?" Steve asked with a frown on his face. They were a little up high, but there was a window in the bathroom and Steve knew Nat's perfectly capable of making it out of here if she wanted to. Yeah, that's probably another thing he needs to settle, maybe just a few safety protocols with FRIDAY.

"Miss Romanoff is still in the bathroom, captain." FRIDAY replied, which made Steve sigh in relief. "But you may want to check on her, sir."

That didn't make Steve feel better. Instead of asking FRIDAY why, Steve reached for the doorknob and pushed open the door. What he saw next probably shouldn't have surprised him.

"Hi daddy!" Tasha was sat in the middle of the bathroom, still in her wet clothes, but she looked like a happy Little nonetheless. Poor thing must have panic dropped.

"Hi baby." Steve said with a smile as he crouched down in front of Tasha. "I think someone needs a quick bath, hm?"

"Baf!" Tasha exclaimed and clapped her hands in delight. "Bubbas?"

"Bubbas?" Steve frowned in confusion as he reached out and took Natasha into his arms. "Oh, you mean bubbles?"

"Bubbas!" Tasha confirmed with a smile as Steve stood up.

"Daddy doesn't have any bubbas right now, I'm sorry baby." Steve said apologetically and he felt his heart almost shatter into a million pieces. The look of disappointment on Tasha's little face made him feel guilty for being so unprepared.

"Daddy and Tasha can buy bubbas, okay?" Steve promised as he walked to the tub and started getting Tasha's bath running.

" 'tawbewwy?" Tasha asked before slipping her fingers into her mouth.

"Mhm, lots of strawberry bubbles." Steve smiled and kissed Tasha's forehead. At least the crisis seems to be averted for now.

"Daddy baf?" Tasha asked curiously as she looked up at Steve.

"No, it's bath time for babies." Steve chuckled and bent down a bit to check the temperature of the water.

"Daddy baf." Tasha frowned, and it wasn't really hard to finally understand what the toddler meant.

"Okay, daddy will have a bath too." Steve said with an amused shake of his head, and he was happy that that seemed to bring a smile to Tasha's face. It didn't take long for the bath to fill, and soon Steve stripped Nat of her wet clothes and gently lowered her into the tub.

"You like baths, don't you?" Steve smiled fondly as he watched Natasha giggling and splashing in the tub.

"Baf!" Tasha giggled and nodded her head. "Daddy baf." She said as she reached a hand out to Steve. He supposed he had to make good on his promise to her, so he stripped down to his boxers and carefully got into the tub with Tasha.

"Daddy look!" Tasha said as she scooped some water into her hands and brought them up before separating them, making the water fall onto her head.

"Wow! How did Tasha do that?" Steve asked, even adding in a little gasp.

"Hewe!" Tasha bent forward and took Steve's hands. Steve smiled as he watched and let Tasha put his hands together and show him how to scoop up water onto his head.

"Thank you baby." Steve smiled as Tasha "helped" him bring his hands up, but Tasha couldn't reach all the way up as Steve was taller, so he did the rest of the way on his own and wet his hair.

Tasha beamed at Steve and looked around the tub. She spotted the little container for soap and reached for it, effectively dumping the soap into the tub and just focusing on the container. Steve watched her first and smiled when he saw that Tasha was just playing with it, maybe pretending that it was a boat? Tasha made the little container move around the water, making little noises as she did so.

Right, bath toys. He'd probably need to get those too. Steve needed to get a lot of things for Tasha, _and_ Nat, for that matter. Steve didn't like the feeling of not having everything that Nat would need, especially since his Little deserved nothing but the best.  
He thought about a little shopping trip for them as Steve took the kids shampoo the other Littles used when they stayed over and squirted some onto his hand. Luckily Tasha was distracted enough with her makeshift toy, so Steve was able to wash her hair without a fuss.

After finding the soap in the tub, Steve washed Natasha too, not wanting her to get a rash from the accident. He didn't really want Tasha to stay in the tub for long right now, so once that was done he drained the tub and rinsed Tasha one more time before getting out and quickly wrapping a towel around his own waist.

He grabbed the fluffiest towel he had before turning back to the tub. "Come here baby." Steve said as he bent down a bit to pick Tasha up, wrapping her tightly in the towel in the process.

"Mm, someone smells good enough to eat!" Steve smiled and pretended to nibble Tasha's cheek, making the toddler squeal and giggle.  
"Daddy no! Tasha no nummies!" Tasha giggled and tried to squirm away from Steve.

"Okay, okay. Tasha's not nummies." Steve smiled and kissed Tasha's cheek before taking her back to the bedroom.

Steve silently thanked Phil once more, because he at least still had some diapers in the bag that Phil gave him. He grabbed it from where it was in the corner of Nat's room before walking to the bed and carefully laying Nat down in the middle.

Natasha of course just rolled over, still in her towel, and tried to crawl away.

"Ah ah, not so fast." Steve shook his head and reached for Natasha, easily making her lie down on her back again. "Nakey babies can't leave the bed."

The pout that formed on Tasha's lips was adorable, but Steve was glad she didn't argue any more than that. Not wanting to risk it though, Steve made quick work of drying Natasha off with the towel and taping a diaper around her waist. After helping Natasha sit up, he got her dressed in just a shirt--since no pants should help him figure out easier if she needed a change, right?

"There we go, all done." Steve smiled. "Now it's daddy's time to dress up." He chuckled and lifted Tasha into his arms.

"Daddy nakey." Tasha giggled, making Steve chuckle.

"Yeah, and daddy's cold." He chuckled. Tasha definitely was one sweet toddler, because after that she rested against Steve and gave him a hug.

"Daddy warm?"

"Yeah, daddy's warm." Steve smiled softly. He rubbed Tasha's back as he carried her to his room where he set her down in the middle of the bed first.

"Stay here while daddy gets dressed, okay?" He said, and Natasha smiled and nodded her head. Steve didn't want to leave Tasha for long though, so he tried to make quick work of getting dressed.

Even then, when he turned back around to face Tasha, the toddler was nowhere to be seen. "Tasha?" Steve asked, concern evident in his voice. She couldn't possibly have gotten far, right?

True enough, Steve found Tasha just outside his bedroom, toddling away down the hall. Tasha could walk, but by the looks of it Steve guessed she was still a little unsteady on her feet.

"And where are you going, hm?" Steve asked as he picked the toddler up.

"Tummy hung'y." Tasha said innocently as she patted her tummy with both hands.

"Daddy will make you some nummies, okay?" Steve said, and that at least got Tasha to smile and nod her head in agreement. So far, so good.

Or not. From the moment Steve tried to gather all the ingredients he needed, he realized it would probably be hard to prepare breakfast with a Little attached to his hip. He couldn't very well just set Tasha down and expect her to stay put as he made breakfast.

He couldn't really trust her to sit on her own at the dining table, too. Or in the living room to watch some cartoons, for that matter. The other Littles' toys were there, and a lot of them had some pretty small parts: The last thing Steve wanted was for Tasha to choke on something. That, and there was the problem about the sockets. The other Littles took no interest in them, but he didn't want to risk it with Tasha. Not to mention the corners of tables and shelves and--shit. His place was a danger zone for toddlers.

"Daddyyyy." Tasha whined and she reached up to tug on Steve's ear in frustration, effectively pulling Steve out of his thoughts.  
Granted, that must have been warranted because Steve was taking an awfully long time considering he was just making pancakes and bacon but still: Natasha can _tug_.

"Hey, hey no pulling. Gentle hands." Steve said calmly as he pulled Tasha's hand away from his ear. "Daddy's sorry he's taking long, baby. Do you want maybe a banana while waiting?"

"Nana." Tasha said with a pitiful sniffle and nod of her head, making Steve sigh in relief. A banana won't be so difficult, right?

For once this morning, Steve was right. After peeling the banana and giving it to Tasha, the toddler seemed pretty content. So much so that she even stayed put when Steve set her down on the ground first. She just sat there contently against the island, happily munching on her banana. He'd check on Tasha every now and then, but even after her banana was all gone, she just sat there, content to play with her feet.

Still, Steve didn't want to push his luck, so he tried to pick up the pace and in a few minutes, breakfast was done. All of a sudden though, his doorbell rang as he put the pancakes on the table. He wasn't expecting anyone, so who could it have been?

"FRIDAY?" Steve spoke as he picked Natasha back up.

"It's agent Coulson, sir." FRIDAY said. "He claims he has some things you might be needing."

Ah, that was right. Phil did mention he could borrow some toddler things for the meantime which Steve was truly grateful for. Great timing too, at that.

"Let's go and say hi to uncle Phil, hm?" Steve said to Tasha as he walked to the front door with her in his arms. True enough, it was Phil who greeted them once he had it opened.

"Good morning, captain." Phil smiled.

"Good morning agent Coulson." Steve nodded as he fixed the way he was holding Tasha. "Why don't you come in?"

"Thank you." Phil nodded, but before taking a step in he turned back to the boxes behind him. "I brought some things over you might find useful." He said as he grabbed the handle of the cart and pushed it inside.

"I brought over a car seat, high chair, and some more diapers." Phil said, and Steve sighed in relief.

"Thank you, Coulson. Really, you're a life saver." Steve said gratefully as he led Phil to the living room.

"I'm aware of that." Phil said with his usual Phil smile. "These are standard issue, and you're free to keep them. But I still suggest you go out with Nat and buy them in her size." He said as he started to unload the cart.

"I intend to do that, but still, thank you for this." Steve nodded his head. "Tasha, do you want to say hi to uncle Phil?" He asked, bouncing the toddler slightly in his arms.

"Hi." Tasha said with a shy wave of her hand, but both Steve and Phil smiled nonetheless.

"Hello Tasha." Phil smiled and walked closer to Steve and Tasha. "Well aren't you an adorable Little? Can uncle Phil get a high five?" He asked, holding his hand up.

At first, Tasha looked at him in confusion but then she eventually reached out and gave Phil a light high five.

"She's adorable, Steve." Phil smiled at him.

"I've figured that much out." Steve chuckled and kissed the side of Tasha's head. "Do you want to stay for breakfast? We're having pancakes and bacon."

"Cakes an' bacon!" Tasha said happily.

"I wish I could, but Fury needs me back in his office soon." Phil said apologetically. "I can help you assemble the high chair before I go."

Normally, Steve would insist that it was fine and he could do it on his own. It seemed to be different now though: He wasn't sure he could assemble it by himself with Tasha to keep in mind, and he wasn't sure Tasha would be okay with hanging out with just Phil for a bit. With that, Steve gratefully accepted the help, and once that was done, thanked Phil one more time before seeing him out.

Phil was right, the high chair was pretty standard red and grey high chair, and Tasha actually objected being set down in it at first.

"It's okay baby, it's your special seat, see?" Steve said soothingly as he tried to get Tasha buckled in.

"Daddyy." Tasha whined and shook her head, but she stopped fighting and basically slumped in her seat.

"Daddy's right here." Steve soothed as he finally got Tasha buckled in before putting the tray back down. "And look baby! Nummies are here too!" He said with a gasp. Steve put two pancakes and some bacon on a plate and placed it on Tasha's tray.

"Nummies!" Tasha cheered and reached for the bacon, which Steve was glad about because he still had to cut up Tasha's pancakes. When he was done with that, Steve realized another problem: No sippy cups, and no bibs.

In truth, Steve couldn't really beat himself up because he wasn't expecting that he'd find his heartmate, and that his heartmate would be a toddler. Regardless, he still felt horrible. While Tasha was busy with her breakfast, Steve went to retrieve the bottle from Nat's bag and washed it before pouring some apple juice into it.

"Is it yummy?" Steve asked with a fond smile. Natasha was getting quite messy with her breakfast and it was quite an adorable sight.

"Yummy! Daddy wan'?" Tasha asked as she held up a piece of her pancake with her syrup-covered hand.

"No thank you baby, that's all yours." Steve said as he smoothed down Tasha's hair. "Just tell daddy if you want more, okay?" He said before taking his seat so he can eat too.

"Otay!"

Breakfast seemed to be going well enough, especially since Tasha asked for more bacon once all her food was gone. But just as Steve thought things were finally taking a turn for the better, the odds turned against him once more.

He was almost done with his breakfast, and Tasha was down to her last slice of bacon so he was getting ready to wipe all the syrup off of her. What stopped him though was that Natasha froze. Her hand that was holding her last slice of bacon froze halfway to her mouth, and a look of utter confusion spread on her face. There were a few moments of silence where Steve contemplated his next move. Before he could decide on anything though, Natasha dropped her bacon and spoke.

"I want out." Nat mumbled, her eyebrows furrowing together as she fumbled with the tray. It looked like she was trying to unlatch it but she was struggling too much. "I want out." She repeated a little louder. Steve hadn't expected her to age so fast, but then again, Bruce did say her drops would be uncontrollable for a bit.

"Okay, I've got it, just let me help, Nat." Steve said calmly as he stood and unlatched the tray. Before he could even push it up, Nat beat him to it and quickly unbuckled herself.  
Steve didn't even get the chance to study her expression, what more say something, before Nat jumped off the chair and went running away.

Well this was one heck of a morning.  
Steve counted to ten in his mind before he left the dining room to look for Natasha. His first guess was her bedroom, and he proved himself right when he found her bedroom door locked.

"Nat? What's wrong honey?" Steve asked as he leaned against the door frame.

"Nothing, I'm fine." Natasha said. Well, at least she was answering.

"Are you sure? You can tell me anything, remember?" Steve reminded Natasha gently. "Can I come in?"

"No, just... Just go away." Nat said and this time, she sounded a bit more upset.

"I can tell something's bothering you, I just want to help." Steve said.

"I said go away!" Natasha said more forcefully.

Steve didn't understand what was going on, or how Natasha got upset the instant she aged up. Did he do something wrong? He thought back to everything that's happened so far, but apart from not being completely prepared, he felt like he somehow managed to handle things relatively well.  
Steve was about to leave and give Nat some space, but then he heard sniffling. Was Natasha crying?

"Nat, let me in please. I can't help you if I don't know what's wrong." Steve tried again. He just had to: He felt like they made some good progress last night, he didn't want them to backtrack.

"I don't need help! Just go away!" This time, Steve was sure that Natasha was crying.

As much as it pained Steve to walk away, he did after a few more moments of hesitation. He didn't plan on just leaving Nat, though. Around every half hour, Steve went back and tried again to get Natasha to open the door, but she never did. On the fourth attempt, Steve was starting to get more worried.

_Natasha_

Natasha stopped crying about an hour ago, but she still felt the same amount of guilt and shame she had upon aging. She'd long ditched the diaper and her syrup-covered shirt for her typical tank and sweats getup. Once the tears stopped, she just stayed in her position curled up on her side on the bed, unmoving apart from telling Steve to go away every half hour.

"I said go away, Steve!" Nat said when there was another knock on her door.

"Nat it's me." Nat frowned in confusion, because that definitely didn't sound like Steve. "Are you going to let me in, or am I going to have to climb through the vents? Because trust me, I know my way around Steve's vents."

If it was any other person, Natasha would have called that a bluff. With Clint though, she was sure he'd be in the vents if she didn't let him in within the next few seconds.

"FRIDAY unlock the door." Natasha muttered and within a second, she heard the sound of her door being unlocked. She didn't move from her position though, not when the door opened and closed, not when she heard footsteps approaching, and not even when the bed dipped when Clint sat down behind her.

Neither of them said anything for a while, and Nat secretly appreciated that. Nat knew what Clint was doing, he knew her too well. He was probably waiting for her to get comfortable enough about her presence first, waiting for her to calm down even the slightest. If he didn't do that, Nat would have probably kicked him out within five seconds.

"Are you trying to beat the world record for longest time unmoving?" Clint asked after a while, and Natasha tried so hard not to roll her eyes.

"What do you want?" Natasha muttered.

"For you to tell me what's wrong." Clint answered. Of course. Steve probably called him up to try to get to her.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Uhhuh, sure. Nat I know you're pretty stubborn and hardheaded but even then you never yell at anyone to go away, especially Steve." Clint pointed out. "He's worried about you, you know?"

"Well he doesn't have to worry about me for long." Natasha shrugged.

"And what's that supposed to mean?" Clint asked, and Nat could imagine him raising an eyebrow at her.

"I don't know, I quit?"

"You quit?" Clint asked in confusion. "What do you mean you quit? The Avengers?"

"No, you idiot." Natasha couldn't stop herself from rolling her eyes anymore.

"Then what are you talking about?" Clint asked, surprisingly sounding patient.

"I don't want a heartmate anymore. I quit." As soon as Natasha said that, she immediately regretted it, but there was no taking it back now. She bit down on her lip to stop it from trembling and she shut her eyes to try and stop her tears.

"Nat..." Clint sighed, and Natasha could feel him scoot a little closer to her on the bed. "Nat, being a heartmate isn't something you can just quit."

"Yes it is." Nat said stubbornly, and Clint gave her a dry chuckle.

"I promise you, it isn't." Clint said. "Why don't you want a heartmate anymore?"

"Because it's tiring." Natasha said before biting down on her lip again.

"Tiring? Nat you've been a heartmate for barely a day, what's gotten you so tired?" Clint asked. That wasn't what she meant though.

"It's not me." Nat said softly with a sniffle. The heartmate thing wasn't really tiring Natasha, if anything it made her feel more at peace, or at least it did while she was dropped. Once she ages, it's as if everything comes crashing down. It's like a hangover you get after a wild night out with your friends, except Nat would for once probably prefer that sensation.

"You mean Steve?" Clint clarified, and maybe her silence was telling enough, because Clint continued down that line. "What makes you think being a heartmate is tiring to Steve? Did he tell you that?"

"No, but he looks tired." Natasha said. "I, when I'm dropped I still pick up on things, Clint. The training, it doesn't really completely go away." She said softly.

"I know what you mean." Clint said, much to her surprise that she actually turned to lie down on her back instead so she can look at him. "You look at Littles when they're dropped, and you think they're a completely different person, yeah? Like they're a clean slate compared to their aged selves?"

"It's not?" Nat asked with a frown.

"Well, it's supposed to be." Clint shrugged, and that got Natasha even more confused. "Most of the time, when I'm dropped I leave the cool, manly big Clint Barton behind--what? I'm being serious."

Natasha was giving Clint an unamused look, but otherwise didn't argue against what he said. Clint already knows she thinks he's an idiot. No point in bringing that back up.

"Most of the time, when I age from a drop and look back at what happened, I remember it like I would a childhood memory." Clint continued,  
"but other times I guess it feels more recent, if that makes sense. Like I was dropped, but aged Clint was in the back seat the whole time, observing the show. And I notice a lot more details than I would have if it was just dropped Clint."

"Like easily reading expressions?"

"Well I can't read expressions as well as you do, but yeah, like that." Clint nodded. "It's not really supposed to be that way though, I know Wanda and Skye don't experience drops like that."

"Then why does it happen to you?" Nat frowned. If that happened to Clint only sometimes, then that means she has it worse? Of the two times she's been dropped, she's experienced it the exact same way Clint was describing.

"I talked to Bruce about it before," Clint admitted, which Nat was surprised about.  
"He says it's most likely because I found my heartmate at a later age. Something about feeling like I always have to keep my guard up while dropped, because technically I was on my own." He shrugged, and that made Nat feel bad.

She'd almost forgotten that Clint had gone long without a heartmate too. They've never really talked about being Little like this before, mostly because it made Natasha feel uncomfortable. Now she felt horrible, because she knew what it felt to be alone. Had she left Clint alone when he needed someone to talk to about these things? Clint was probably even older than she was when he found Tony.

"Is that how your drops have been like?" Clint asked, pulling Natasha out of her thoughts.  
Nat considered lying, but where would that get her? Here, Clint was opening himself up to Nat. This is her best friend, if she couldn't tell Clint, then who could she?

"Yeah, I mean, I've only dropped twice, but they've both been like that." Nat admitted softly as she moved to sit up instead. She rested her back against the headboard and pulled her knees up to her chest.

"I would have guessed." Clint said with a nod.

"So it happens to you because you don't think you're safe?" Nat frowned.

"It rarely happens anymore, but that's the gist." Clint confirmed. "I guess it's your mind's way of letting you protect yourself? Like, your mind keeps your adult version of you nearby in case shit hits the fan."

"Oh." Not a very intelligible response, but Nat couldn't muster more than that. "So it took you a while to feel safe with Tony?"

"Mmm, not exactly. It wasn't really a matter of safety for me. Looking back, I think I was just overly cautious."

"But why?" Nat thought that was a stupid question considering their profession, but luckily, Clint didn't think it was.

"My heartmate was a self-proclaimed genius, billionaire, playboy, and philanthropist, in case you've forgotten." Clint pointed out with a soft chuckle. "Wasn't really sure if he actually even wanted a heartmate. You know how Tony was during our first few weeks as a team."

Yup, Natasha remembered that very clearly. Nat wouldn't have guessed that Tony wanted a heartmate either, let alone someone from work; but look at him now.

"So, I don't know, I guess part of me just didn't want to screw it up. I didn't know if Tony wanted a heartmate, but I did." Clint continued. "I don't know if you remember, but during my first few months with Tony, I rarely dropped."

"Yeah, I remember." Natasha said with a nod, "But you just said it was because you were too tired and wanted to sleep instead." She said with her eyebrows furrowed. Those had been tiring months for all of them, so no one really found it suspicious. Or at least Natasha didn't.

"Not the complete truth. I was avoiding dropping whenever Tony was around, and surprisingly he was around a lot." He said with a roll of his eyes. "I didn't want to give him any more reasons to dislike me, so I tried my best not to tire him out."

"I only learned later on that he was actually around a lot because he was waiting for me to drop." Clint continued, shaking his head in amusement at the memory.  
"The heartmate connection, I don't know, it really is something different, Nat. I mean sure, outside my relationship with Tony he was still that playboy philanthropist or whatever who seemed to not have a single fuck to give about Littles, but he was different with me."

"A lot's changed since then." Natasha added.

"Yeah, now he's uncle Tony to one too many agents." Clint said, but Nat knew he meant nothing by it.

Didn't mean she couldn't tease him though. "Aww, someone's jealous." She teased, the smallest of smiles on her face.

"Ah shut up, I got over it." Clint chuckled, and then the two of them just sat together in silence.

Natasha mulled over what Clint told her, about what really happened between him and Tony. Tony _actually_ didn't seem to care about the whole heartmate or Little ideas before he had his own, and since then, Tony's changed a lot. Heck, he was even considered one of the cool uncles around.

If Tony ended up liking being a heartmate despite... Well, himself as a person, then why was she so worried about fucking things up with Steve? Steve was probably as stereotypical as you can get. Want a poster child for ideal Big? That's Steve. Steve's always loved taking care of Littles, and she knew, _everyone_ knew how Steve wanted a heartmate of his own too--

Right. She was worried about screwing up and not being the heartmate Steve wanted.  
Even though she's only been with Steve for less than a day, Nat was already certain that he was the heartmate she wanted. What if it wasn't the same for Steve? She didn't think she could face that disappointment.

"I can practically hear the gears turning in your head." Clint said after a while.

"I think I tire Steve out, or I'm going to tire him out eventually." Natasha admitted before she could even stop herself.

"What makes you say that?" Clint asked.

"When I look back on my drops after aging, what stands out is his uncertainty." Natasha said. She frowned as she wrapped an arm around her knee and picked on a loose thread on her sweats with her free hand.  
"Sure, he's always wanted a heartmate, but what if he just says that because he's always been around you guys? You're all kids, not babies or toddlers. It's different, I rely too much on him, and I feel like I'm too much work."

"You do know how ridiculous this sounds, right?" Clint said, and before Nat could argue, he continued. "If anyone in SHIELD's fit to have a toddler Little, that's Steve. If anyone in SHIELD would _want_ to have a toddler Little--well, I can name a lot, but I bet my guts that Steve's on top of that list."

"You're just saying that to try to make me feel better."

"Yes, but no." Clint said. "Nat think about it, Steve _loves_ taking care of Littles. He spends his free time volunteering in the day care when none of us are dropped, for crying out loud. You think that's a Big that doesn't enjoy, well, being a Big? A Big who wouldn't want to be a heartmate?"

"Well, no." Nat frowned to herself.

"Now I don't doubt your ability to read people, so I believe you when you say Steve seems uncertain," Clint said,  
"but knowing he feels that way is different from knowing why he does, Nat. Just because he looks uncertain while you're dropped, doesn't mean he's uncertain about you. It could be anything, I don't know. But you know who does?"

"Steve." Nat sighed.

"I knew you're smart." Clint teased lightly, earning a playful glare from Natasha. "Now are you going to talk to him?" He asked in a gentler tone.

"I'm going to have to eventually, right?" Natasha said as she wrapped both her arms around her knees this time.

"Yeah, you are." Clint said with a sympathetic smile. "I'll go and call him in, okay?" He said before scooting a bit closer to Nat and pulling her in for a hug and kissing the top of her head. Clint gave her a reassuring smile before letting go and getting up, leaving the room to call Steve.

When Steve finally arrived a few moments later, Nat felt her throat tighten up.

"Hey." Steve greeted Nat from the doorway. "Can I come in?" Natasha didn't say anything, but she nodded her head and Steve walked over to sit on the end of the bed, facing Natasha.

"What's on your mind, Nat? How are you feeling?"

Nat really, really wanted to go for the evasive route again. It was just her instinct to shut people out when it came to her feelings, the rare exception being Clint. But then she thought back to her conversation with Clint, and how much sense Clint made for once.

"Confused." Nat admitted with a frown, glancing at Steve for a moment before looking back down at her knees. "Worried? I don't know."

"Why do you feel confused or worried?" Knowing why a person feels that way is different, that's right.

"I, I know you said you care, and that you want me and you're here to stay," Nat said, "but that's now. You're saying that now. What if in a few weeks time I'm still like this? I don't know how to control how I act when I'm dropped, what if I'm still going to be so needy or dependent?"

"Honey, didn't we talk about this yesterday?" Steve said in his soothing voice.

"Yeah, but you still looked uncertain about things today." Nat pointed out softly, and she chanced a glance at Steve only to find him frowning. Clint had probably given him the 411, because Steve didn't ask anymore what she meant.

"You're right about that, I've been feeling a little unsure especially this morning," Steve admitted, and Nat felt her heart clenching. "A lot happened this morning that I feel like I could have been better prepared for." That wasn't what Natasha was expecting.

"We could have avoided the accident if I'd just changed you before tucking you in last night, I didn't have any bubble bath or bath toys for you, my apartment may be a kid haven but it's definitely not toddler safe," He said with a shake of his head,

"I guess I'm worried I won't be enough for you. Nat, you deserve the best, and everything that's happened this morning just got me the littlest bit shaken because I want to give you the best and I'm already messing up." But he wasn't messing up...

"I thought you were uncertain about being my heartmate." Nat admitted, unable to hide the sadness in her tone.

"I'd never feel uncertain about you." Steve was quick to reassure. "I meant what I said yesterday: You're all I'll ever want in a heartmate, Nat. I'm sorry if I made you feel otherwise, but I'm sure about you, okay? I was a little unsure about my preparation, or my own skills in taking care of you, but I promise my heart's sure about you."

"It didn't feel like you were unprepared though," Nat said softly.

"That means a lot coming from you, thank you." Steve said sincerely. "Is that why you ran off earlier?" Steve asked, and Natasha blushed because she realized how silly that was, but she nodded her head in response.

"I just didn't want to do anything that'd make you doubt having me any more." Nat admitted. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have run off like that."

In truth, Natasha wasn't quite sure just yet if she completely believed Steve, but maybe this wasn't something she can believe through words. She'll have to give it time.

"It's okay, but next time let's try to talk before we run, yeah?" Steve said with the smallest of smiles which Natasha returned. "Is there anything else on your mind that you want to talk about?"

"No, not really." Natasha said honestly with a shake of her head.

"Okay, come here then." Steve said as he opened up his arms for Natasha, which she gladly crawled into. She wasn't really much of a hugger, but ever since she first dropped, she found that that had absolutely changed.

"Do you want Clint to stay for lunch?" Steve asked, still keeping his arms comfortingly around Natasha who had her head tucked underneath Steve's chin.

"Maybe, is that okay?" She asked softly. Having Clint around first sounded nice. Steve was her heartmate and all, but Clint would always be her best friend.

"More than okay." Steve assured. "He's just in the living room, do you want to stay there with him while I make lunch?"

"Okay." Natasha nodded her head, but she didn't pull away just yet. She was still basking in the comfort and smiled even more when Steve kissed the top of her head. After a while, she decided to finally pull away, albeit reluctantly.

"Let's go." She said softly, and Steve gave her a reassuring smile before standing and helping Natasha off the bed.


	10. Chapter 10

To say that Steve was relieved that they resolved the little situation would be an understatement. When Natasha ran off earlier out of nowhere and wouldn't let him in the room, he'd thought they'd lost the little progress that they made. Calling Clint for help was honestly a last resort for him, as much as possible he wanted to be the one to get to Natasha, but that seemed highly unlikely earlier. He didn't want Natasha suffering in her own thoughts any longer, which was why he made the call, and he was glad he did.

As much as Steve wanted to have fixed things on his own, he was still grateful for Clint's help. The thought that Natasha also has someone else she can trust brought comfort to him as well. Even though he always wants to be there for Nat, Steve knows that's not always possible, so he's glad they have Clint to count on. The more people who could love on and care for Natasha, the better.

"Honey," Steve said, stopping just outside their living room, "I think we'll need to go out later to buy some of your things." He said gently.

"Oh." Natasha frowned. "Well, um, okay."

"Do you want Clint to come with us?" He asked gently. Maybe having Clint along would make Natasha feel more at ease about it.

"I don't know if he'd want to though." Natasha frowned.

"Well, we'll never know unless we ask, right?" Steve said with a small smile. "Why don't you ask him while I prepare us some lunch?"

"Yeah, alright." Natasha sighed and looked down at her hands.

"It'll be okay honey." Steve said reassuringly as he wrapped an arm around Natasha and kissed the top of her head.   
Natasha didn't say anything in response anymore, so Steve just began walking again and led Natasha into the living room. 

"Clint, you want to stay for lunch?" Steve asked once he and Natasha got to the living room. Steve had one hand on Natasha's shoulder for comfort.

"Lunch sounds good, actually." Clint said with a smile from where he was seated on the couch. He was hoping he could stay anyway because he just wanted to be there for his best friend. "You need any help?"

"Thanks, but it's fine, I got it." Steve said. "Nat was hoping to watch a movie with you, though." He said, and Clint looked at Natasha curiously for a moment, but it was immediately replaced with a smile.

Natasha shifted a little in her spot because she couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed. She was a grown ass woman for crying out loud, she didn't need this much comfort or reassurance from her friends.

"What do you want to watch?" Clint asked Natasha.

"You can pick, you're the guest." Natasha said, but really her mind was just too preoccupied with other thoughts. She couldn't bother herself with a movie choice right now.

"Toy Story it is, then." Clint said, making Natasha groan. It was completely warranted.

"Not again." Nat muttered, and Steve chuckled at her misfortune. Clint was, for whatever reason, currently obsessed with Toy Story both when aged _and_ dropped.

"Good luck," Steve said with an amused smile before kissing the top of Natasha's head again, "I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything, okay?" He told her quietly.

Natasha blushed once more, again feeling that little embarrassment, but she gave him a small smile and nodded her head.   
That satisfied Steve enough, so he gently nudged her to the sofa before turning to leave the pair. As Steve was walking away, Clint and Natasha argued about Toy Story being the best movie of all time. Well that, and making sure Clint suffered the same fate as Sid in the first movie if he didn't shut up.

As Steve left them in the living room though, Natasha found herself following him with her eyes. Part of her wanted to get up and physically follow him, but she knew she was being ridiculous. She really was itching to go after him though...

"Just pick a movie already," Clint chuckled, effectively pulling Natasha out of her thoughts, "you just keep turning down all my suggestions."

"You suggested Toy Story 1, 2, and 3." Nat pointed out in an unamused tone.

"Your point?" Clint asked, and Natasha had to pick up a throw pillow and hit him in the chest with it.

"Jeez, Nat. Never took you for the violent type." Clint teased, making Nat roll her eyes in good nature. "Just pick something out already." He chuckled.

"What about Lord of the Rings? You're in that one, right?" It was Natasha's turn to tease, and Clint's to glare playfully at her.

"Ha-ha, very funny. I'll have you know I'm more attractive than budget Hawkeye."

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." Natasha smirked. With everything that's changing in her life right now, Nat's grateful that her friendship with Clint was one of those things that remained constant, even if that meant he was still a big idiot or dork sometimes.

"You really want to watch Lord of the Rings?" Clint asked, but he was already searching for it on the TV.

"Well, I'd prefer it over Toy Story, I guess." Natasha said. Clint had his arm around the back of the couch and Nat found herself unconsciously moving closer to him.

"You okay?" Clint asked in a curious tone, but he moved his arm so he could wrap it around Natasha instead of having it resting on the sofa's back. Natasha rarely initiated cuddles, so Clint just had to check.

It was then Natasha blushed again when she realized she may appear to be a little clingy, but she nodded her head and didn't pull away. This is Clint: She's cuddled up to Clint one or two times in the past. When she realized that Clint didn't seem to think too much of it so she gave a soft sigh of relief.

Clint eventually found the movie and soon, Lord of the Rings was pulled up on the TV. In truth, they were probably only half paying attention. Mostly, the two of them were talking about random things, and Natasha even managed to bring up their shopping trip too. Much to her delight, Clint agreed to come. Just by looking at them now, you wouldn't think that Natasha was having a rough time, or that she was feeling out of her element thanks to her drops.

That calm was short-lived though, as about half an hour later, Nat couldn't stop glancing back at the doorway as if willing Steve to come in. She'd occasionally strain her ears to try and see if she could hear Steve. She couldn't, and it was making her feel a little tense. What if he'd left her? She knew she was too much work, Steve must have run off while he could--

"Nat? Nat you're breathing awfully quick." Clint said, but Natasha wasn't paying attention. She was busy running circles in her mind.

She can handle being alone, right? She's been alone all her life... But things are different now. Then again, they don't have to be. She can find a way to sneak in some more ingredients for her pills, then she wouldn't have to worry about all this. She can survive on her own, she didn't need a heartmate, right?

" _Natasha_." Clint said with a little more urgency. Thanks to all her panicking, she hadn't even felt Clint move off the couch and notice him crouching down in front of her.

"What?" Nat frowned as she finally snapped out of her thoughts for a moment.

"Do you want me to take you to Steve?" Clint asked, and he both sounded and looked concerned. He knew his best friend well enough, and she seemed to be on the verge of a panic attack.

"I, no, it's okay." Natasha stammered and shook her head a little too vigorously than intended.  
Clint of course, didn't buy it one bit.

"Come on, we're going to Steve." He said as he stood and offered a hand out for Nat to take.

Nat just stared at Clint's hand for a moment. On one hand, she really did want to go to Steve, but on the other she didn't want to find out if Steve really did leave her. The side that wanted to Steve won though, and she hesitantly put her hand in Clint's and the latter gently helped her up.

Clint led her out the living room and towards the kitchen. The closer they got, it became more evident to Natasha that perhaps Steve hadn't left: She could hear someone moving about, opening the fridge and then the cupboards.

"Hey Steve," Clint said, but Natasha still didn't dare to look up from where she was just staring at her feet, "mind if we join you?"

"No not at all," Steve said, and Natasha took the chance to look up at him. Steve looked at Nat in concern, and then back at Clint. "Everything alright?"

"Mhm, we just wanted to make sure you weren't going to burn your place down." Clint said casually as he led Natasha further inside. Once they were close enough to Steve, he let go of her hand but Natasha didn't move at all.

"What's for lunch?" He asked, trying to make this seem casual.

"Pomegranate chicken with almond couscous. You two like that, right?" Steve asked. He could tell that something was wrong, but if Clint was trying to be discrete about it, Steve didn't want to pry.

"I missed having lunch over here." Clint said with a chuckle as he rubbed his hands together in delight. He looked at Steve and gave him a knowing look before glancing back at Natasha. She seemed to be distracted, or well, not paying attention, so Clint took this as an opportunity.

Clint walked in the general direction towards Steve, but made it look like he was heading to the fridge. He slowed down a bit when he reached Steve so he could give him a heads up.

"I think she panicked when she couldn't see or hear you." Clint whispered softly into Steve's ear before he went to the fridge as a cover.

Steve frowned at that information, but he nodded his head and looked at his Little in concern. "Want to watch me make lunch?" He asked as gently as he could.

It took a while for Natasha to look up at him and respond, but she eventually did with a slight nod of her head. For a moment she was worried that Steve was going to tell them to go back to the living room, so this provided small relief.

"How about you sit up here, hm?" Steve suggested as he nodded to the counter next to him. "That way you can see better."   
In truth, Steve just thought that might calm her down more if Clint was right. At least then they could be close and see each other.

Now Steve wasn't expecting Natasha to actually agree to it, he was hoping she would, but he wasn't expecting she would. So of course he was surprised not only when she nodded, but also when she shyly held her arms up, as if asking for help to get up on the counter.

Nat didn't know what got into her, but she just really wanted as much comfort from Steve as she can get. She wasn't sure about how to ask for a hug from Steve, so maybe this was the closest thing that she could get.

"Alright, up we go." Steve said softly as he lifted Natasha up onto the counter. "All good?" He asked with a small smile, and Natasha just nodded. He was slightly concerned that she wasn't talking, but at least she was responding, right?

From then, Steve made sure to stay close to Natasha. Clint even helped out whenever he can so Steve wouldn't have to go too far. It took a while, but Natasha eventually seemed to relax enough such that she wasn't tensing up whenever Steve would step away for a moment. Once lunch was all cooked, Clint brought the food to the table while Steve turned to Natasha.

"Come on baby, it's time to eat." Steve smiled and reached for Natasha to help her off the counter.

"I'm sorry." Natasha said softly with a frown as Steve helped her down onto her feet. "I don't know what happened."

"It's okay, you don't have to be sorry about anything." Steve said soothingly. "You know I never mind your company, and Bruce talked to us about this, right? He did mention you'll be a little more sensitive these first few days, and it's okay. I'll be right here to help you through it, hm?"

"Yeah, okay." Natasha sighed, and Steve gently tugged her back into his arms. At that, Natasha felt as if a huge weight was lifted off her shoulders even for just a moment.

"We'll be okay." He said reassuringly as he rubbed Natasha's back, and she stayed in his arms for quite a while.

"Clint's coming shopping with us." Natasha said softly, and Steve smiled at that.

"Alright, that sounds fun." Steve said before kissing the top of Natasha's head.

He let Natasha decide when she wanted to pull away, and she did a couple of moments later, albeit hesitantly. Once she did, Steve led her to the dining room where Clint had already set the table. Steve and Natasha sat next to each other, while Clint sat across from Natasha as they had lunch.

Lunch was a relatively quiet meal, but Clint and Steve tried to keep up conversation so as not to make Natasha feel uncomfortable. Both men were careful though, making sure Natasha was okay the entire time; and she luckily was. Once they were done eating lunch, Steve asked Natasha to go get ready for them to leave while he and Clint cleaned up. Soon, the three of them were ready to go with Steve making sure to bring the box with the car seat in it with them.

Since Steve was the cool uncle who brought the Littles to places, one of his cars was an SUV so that was what he decided to use today. As they walked to the car, Steve and Clint kept Natasha between them while they talked about all the things they were going to buy.

In no time, they got to Steve's SUV with little to no trouble coming their way. They weren't really sure how Nat would react to seeing other agents right now, so Steve was glad they didn't come across too many. The ones they did seemed to mind their own business at least.

"Do I really need to sit on that?" Nat asked as Steve was setting up the car seat in the middle of the SUV's second row.  
It was bad enough that she was a toddler Little, this was just rubbing salt on the wound at this point. Surely she didn't _have_ to ride in a car seat, right? Let alone one with a 5 point harness: This was ridiculous!

"It's the law, and it's safer for you this way." Steve said as he finished strapping it down before standing back up outside. It really stated in the law that toddler Littles had to use car seats even when aged.

"This is ridiculous. Clint's just a few inches taller than me and he doesn't have to sit on one." Natasha argued, unaware of how childish she sounded.

"I know but baby, he's not a toddler Little." Steve said gently. "I know this all looks unfair right now, but this is all in place to keep you safe."

"I don't think it's so bad." Clint said. "It looks pretty comfy to me." If this was anyone else, he'd probably tease, but it's Natasha.   
Ok, he'd still tease Natasha on a regular day but he knows she's having a rough time, so he toned it down for now.

"You sit on it, then." Nat muttered, making Steve shake his head.

"Just get in, Nat. No one's going to make fun." Clint said reassuringly.

Steve looked at Nat, and his Little seemed awfully troubled, eventually she climbed into the SUV. She looked grumpy as she did, but she got into her seat nonetheless. Steve watched her for a while as Nat tried to buckle herself in, but after a few moments of Nat struggling, he stepped in.

"Let me help." He said gently as he got back into the car first. He earned a huff from Natasha, but other than that she didn't protest so Steve proceeded to get her buckled in.

"There we go." Steve said once he got Nat all buckled in. "We'll get one right for your size later, okay?"  
Nat was actually dwarfed by the seat from Phil, so they would need to buy one later so they're sure the seat's actually serving its purpose.

"Doesn't make it suck any less." Natasha muttered.

"I know, but at least it'll be comfier and we're surer that you're safe." Steve said with a small smile before turning to look at Clint who was still outside. "You want to sit with Nat?"

"Mhm, sure." Clint nodded his head, so Steve went out so Clint could take his place.

Once the two were settled in the back, Steve got in behind the wheel and started the car. He looked at Natasha through the rearview mirror and couldn't help but smile because he really did have an adorable Little. He double checked that Clint had his seatbelt on too before pulling the car out of parking and beginning their drive to the mall.

About halfway through the drive, Steve was again thankful that Clint had agreed to come. Although Natasha still seemed a little down about her car seat, she was making conversation with Clint and was laughing (although softly) every now and then. Not once did Clint bring up the car seat, and he was talking to Natasha like he normally did. Hopefully this'd help Natasha understand that although a lot will be changing, a lot's staying the same too.

It took them about only 20 minutes to get to the mall and since it was a weekday, it seemed to be pretty empty too: Steve managed to find them a good parking spot almost instantly.

"Alright, we're here." Steve said as he parked the car. "Clint, can you help Nat out?"

"Yeah of course." Clint said. He got himself unbuckled before turning to Natasha who now looked completely bummed about being at the mall.

"Hey, lighten up. We're at the mall, not another one of those car exhibits Tony likes so much." Clint said as he reached over and got Natasha unbuckled from her seat.

"I know, I'm just a little tired, s'all." Steve heard Natasha say just as he got out of the car.  
He waited for Clint and Natasha to get out, and once they did he offered Natasha a reassuring smile.

"We'll go to Littles 'R Us for your furniture first, sound good?" Steve asked, but Natasha just sighed and nodded in response.

Just one look at Natasha and anyone could easily tell that she didn't want to be here, so of course Steve easily picked up on that. 

"I'll try to make this quick for us." He told Natasha softly with a small smile before turning to lead the way. He trusted that Clint would walk with her at least. Steve wanted to walk with her, but he felt like he was doing nothing but stress Natasha out for one reason or another today.

But that wasn't true, not even the slightest bit: Steve made everything easier, more bearable. That's why when Steve walked away, Natasha felt her heart clench and her stomach drop.

"Why don't you go and walk with Steve?" Clint suggested gently as he put a hand on the small of Natasha's back to guide her.

"I, I don't think he wants to." Natasha frowned.

"Trust me Nat, he does. He probably just thinks that you want space or something." Clint said with a shake of his head.

Natasha mulled over that possibility, but Steve was getting too far for her liking. Before Steve could get any farther, Natasha half-ran after him. Once she was at his side, she looked up at Steve and saw a brief moment of shock come across his face. She offered him a small smile before looking down at his hand and shyly reaching for it.

Naturally, Steve was surprised, but he didn't let it show any more than he already did. He just smiled at Natasha and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. Clint eventually fell into step with them, so the three made their way to Littles 'R Us. Upon reaching the store, Steve couldn't help the smile that came across his face.

The previous times he's been here, they were so he could buy some presents for his nephews and nieces. Now he was here to spoil his Little rotten: Talk about growth.

Natasha on the other hand, wasn't feeling quite as thrilled.   
The store seemed pleasant enough though: They were playing music at a certain frequency that basically helped Littles produce just the right amount of happy hormones. The system was set in place by the owner specially for Littles who got anxious in big, crowded places. Littles 'R Us is usually crowded, but they seem to have come at the right time. There were a few families mulling about, but it was a lot calmer than usual.

"How about we start with furniture for your nursery?" Steve asked Natasha.

"Okay, sounds good." Natasha said with a nod. She was trying to put on a brave face even though she wanted nothing more than to go home right now.

"You need to make sure you pick out the comfiest bed." Clint said as he walked with the two heartmates towards the section for nurseries. "Or crib, whatever fits." Clint added when he remembered Nat's toddler status.

"A crib?" Nat frowned. That option hadn't really occurred to her.

"We'll see what's best, okay baby?" Steve said soothingly as he led the way, still holding onto Natasha's hand.

Once they got to the nursery section, Steve was happy to see that everything was also grouped according to Little age. They went to the beds section first, and when Steve saw that ages two and below had cribs, he had a feeling this wasn't going to go well.

"Can't we choose from those?" Natasha asked with a frown, pointing to the toddler beds for three and up.

"Well, technically we can." Steve said hesitantly. "But I think they grouped the furniture this way for the best. I think we should choose from the cribs, but if you really don't want to do that, then we can choose from the beds."

Natasha sighed and closed her eyes for a moment as she weighed her options. On one hand, getting a crib would be utterly embarrassing. On the other though, he had a feeling Steve was right. They wouldn't make cribs for Littles if they weren't necessary, so it shouldn't be embarrassing to have one. It's just that some Littles need cribs, and she happens to be one of those Littles.

"I think the cribs look pretty cozy." Clint said with a shrug. He was just trying to nudge Natasha into the right direction.

 _"You sleep in one, then."_ Was what Natasha wanted to say, but instead she said "yeah I guess they do." She sighed.

"How about we take a closer look?" Steve said with a gentle smile, and Natasha reluctantly nodded her head. "What color do you want it to be?" Steve asked as he approached the selection with Natasha.

"I don't know." Natasha shrugged as she looked at her options. She wanted to act like she didn't really care, but for some reason part of her was actually starting to get interested.

"How about this one? This seems nice." Steve said as he gestured to one with a black frame. He assumed Nat would like this one because it looked sleek and simple; but Natasha didn't.

"No, maybe not that." Natasha said softly with a shake of her head. Nat would have chosen that, but Tasha was telling her not to.   
She looked at the other cribs, and one in particular caught her attention.

Steve looked at Natasha and tried to see what she was looking at. "How about this? Do you like this one?" He asked as he led Natasha to another crib.   
It was an off-white, tufted crib with old rose upholstered sides. It looked pretty elegant, as if it was something you'd get for a little princess.

"Maybe? I dunno." Natasha shrugged and unconsciously moved closer to Steve. She was too shy to admit that she actually liked that one. Steve smiled at Natasha and let go of her hand in favor of wrapping his arm around her instead to keep her close.

"Hi there." a woman spoke, making the three look in the general direction from which the voice came. "My name's Eleanor. Is there anything that I can help you with?" She asked with a kind smile.

She was a brunette with wavy hair and soft features and just looking at her seemed to comfort Natasha for some reason. Littles 'R Us was pretty particular with their employees: They only hired people who had naturally kind, calming auras about them.

"Hi Eleanor. Yes, we'd appreciate some help please. We're looking to buy a crib--actually, we're looking to furnish a new nursery." Steve said sheepishly as he scratched the back of his neck with a free hand.   
"We think we've found a crib so far, do you still have any of these in stock? Or is there any in particular that you recommend?"

"Well, cribs aren't really a one size fits all kind of thing." Eleanor said. "If there's one that your Little seems to be inclined to, we can work from there and just customize it as we see fit."

"That sounds good." Steve said with a nod. "She seems to like this one, is that right baby?" Steve gestured to the crib before looking down at Natasha for confirmation.

There really was no point in hiding it anymore, so Natasha just nodded her head in agreement. It was the one that appealed to her the most.

"I think this is pretty fitting for her; it's like it's made for a princess, isn't it?" Eleanor smiled, but Natasha just shrugged before turning to hide her face in Steve's side. The ambiance of the store and Steve's comfort was bringing her closer and closer to a drop.

"I'm sorry, she's just a little shy right now." Steve said apologetically.

"It's fine, we get a lot of shy Littles around here." Eleanor chuckled softly. "We usually recommend testing the furniture out before making a purchase. It's just so we're sure it's the right fit for the Little. Easier to be sure about her comfort now than to have to exchange it for something else later."

"Alright, that sounds like a good idea." Steve nodded before turning to look down at Natasha. "Baby? Did you hear what Eleanor said?" He asked softly.

"Yeah." Natasha said, her voice muffled from where she was still hiding her face in Steve's side.

"I'm going to lift you into the crib now, okay? It'll only be for a little while." He said as he rubbed Natasha's back. He could tell that Nat was on the cusp of dropping so he was treading carefully.

Nat, against her better judgment, whined softly and tightened her hold on Steve, but she nodded her head nonetheless.

"Okay, up we go." Steve said as he reached down for Natasha. Luckily, Nat let go of Steve just as he started to lift her up.   
Steve made sure to be gentle as he moved her over and lowered her into the crib, helping her lie down.

By the time she was lying down, Natasha was blushing furiously; but then she relaxed. Just a few seconds after lying down, she felt all the tension leave her shoulders and she even forgot about feeling embarrassed for a moment.

"Yeah, I think she likes this one." Clint said with a soft chuckle. He was standing to the side so as not to crowd Nat, but he could still see her from there.

"Looks like it." Steve smiled fondly as he looked at his Little.

"This seems to be the right size for her, so I'll just note down this model." Eleanor said as she looked at the tag. "Do you want to have fixed railings?"

"Mhm, that should be safer, right?"

"We recommend fixed if your Little has the tendency to be a little mischievous and climb out." Eleanor said with an amused smile.

"Fixed it is then." Steve chuckled before turning back to Natasha. "Don't go to sleep baby, we still have more things to buy for you." Steve said gently when he saw Nat curling up to her side and blinking tiredly.

"I'm just resting my eyes." Nat said, making Steve shake his head in amusement.   
Before Natasha could fall asleep, Steve reached down and lifted her back up into his arms, holding her on his hip.

"Do you want to stay up here first?" Steve asked. At the rate they were going, Nat would probably be dropped in a few minutes if they kept this up.

Instead of answering Steve's question though, Natasha just rested her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him. She knows she should be embarrassed about acting like this while aged, but she really wasn't anymore. At this point, she was just happy to be in Steve's arms where she felt safe and loved.

This was no issue for Steve of course, and he just smiled and kissed the top of Natasha's head.   
"I think I want to get a bedside crib for her too. Just for nights she wants to sleep in my room." Steve told Eleanor as he started to sway with Natasha.

"We have a bedside version of this one, would that work or are you looking for a different model this time?"

"No, this should work. She likes this one." Steve said with a smile, and Eleanor nodded her head and tapped away on her tablet.

Eleanor was really helpful, so Steve actually asked if she could stay to guide them, and she was happy to do so. They stayed in the nursery section for a while more, picking out the changing table, closets, bedding, and even a little canopy among others. The entire time, Nat stayed in Steve's arms, but she'd give her input every now and then, even if it was just to nod or shake her head.

By the time they had everything for Nat's nursery, Steve thought she would've been dropped already, but she wasn't.

"Do you already have a high chair for her?" Eleanor asked.

"We have a standard-issue, but I think I want to get her a new one." Steve said as he continued to rub Natasha's back.

"Alright, I can lead you to the dining section, then. Bottles, sippy cups, and all other essentials are there too." Eleanor smiled.

By now, Clint had volunteered to take the push cart--which was already almost full with the things for the nursery, sans furniture. It still felt a little odd to see his best friend acting this way, but he didn't love her any less.

Steve and Clint walked to follow Eleanor, chatting away as they did. When they got to the dining section, Eleanor led them to the high chairs first.

"I'm assuming since we went for a crib, she's 2 at the oldest?" Eleanor asked.

"Yeah, she's 2 actually." Steve confirmed as he adjusted his hold on Natasha.

"I strongly recommend this one, then." Eleanor said, gesturing to the high chair in the middle. "It's our best seller, and the safest option for her. No exposed hinges so she won't get hurt, and complete with harness and crotch bar to keep her in place."

"Are we allowed to test it out? Just to be sure it's okay with her too?" Steve asked.

"Yes of course." Eleanor smiled. "That way I can show you how everything works too."   
Most toddler Little furniture with buckles are designed so that you could only unbuckle them from a certain angle. It was just to ensure that Littles don't accidentally unbuckle themselves when dropped.

"Nat? I'm going to put you down for a moment, okay?" Steve told Natasha in a gentle voice. "We just need to see if this high chair's right for you. I want to make sure you're comfortable too."

"Okay..." Natasha said softly, but she had a deep frown on her face. She was quite comfy in Steve's arms, so she wasn't looking forward to being set down.

Lucky for her, Eleanor still had to show Steve how to adjust the high chair and everything, so she still had cuddles for a little while more. Eventually though, Eleanor lifted the tray up and nodded for Steve to set Natasha down, which he did.

"Shh, it's okay, I'm right here." Steve said soothingly when Natasha whined after being set down in the chair.

"No, no more please." Natasha frowned as she reached up for Steve. Really, her speech was the only indicator now for Steve that she wasn't dropped. Everything else would've fooled Steve into believing he had Tasha with him right now.

"You don't like this one?" Steve asked. He was in the middle of buckling Natasha in, but he'd stop if she didn't like this.

"It's not that." Natasha whined. "I just want you." She said sadly.

"This'll only take a few seconds, okay baby?" Steve said soothingly as he resumed buckling Natasha in. "I'll be done by the count of 20. Can you count to 20 for me?"

Natasha didn't have it in her to be embarrassed anymore, so she just pitifully nodded her head and sniffled. She wanted to make sure Steve kept her promise, so she counted out loud, but still in a soft voice.

"One... Two... Three..." Nat counted, and Steve smiled fondly at her as he got her settled.

"Yeah, I think this is good. Do you have this in other colors?" Steve asked Eleanor.

"The frame only comes in white, but it also comes with different covers and trays, so you can change them as you like." Eleanor said

"eight... Nine... Ten..."

"Okay, that sounds perfect. We'll take this one." Steve smiled.

"Th...th... Twee... One... Chu..."

It took a second or so before Steve picked up on Nat's counting and realized that something was up. He turned back to Natasha and bent down a bit so he can be more levelled with her.

"Tasha? Baby is this you?" Steve asked softly.

"Tasha!" Tasha said happily with a giggle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this was a little uneventful, and ended pretty abruptly huhu  
> but I just wanted to get something out already D; and it was getting too long aaaaa


	11. Chapter 11

"Hi baby Tasha." Steve smiled at his Little. "Do you like your new special chair?"   
He'd been waiting for Nat to drop for some time now because he could sense that Nat was struggling, so it was a relief to see Tasha finally in front of him.

"Chaiw! Chaiw! Chaiw!" Tasha chanted and repeatedly banged her hands down on the tray.

"I'll take that as a yes." Steve chuckled as he stood up straight again so he could get Tasha back out.

"Would you like me to put this model in your list as well?" Eleanor asked as Steve got Tasha unbuckled.

"Daddyyyy!" Tasha squealed in delight, holding her arms up and making grabby hands for Steve.

"Yes please Eleanor." Steve said with a nod as he picked up Natasha and gave her a kiss on the nose, making the toddler giggle. Gods, Tasha had the most adorable giggle.

"Didn't think I'd ever say this, but Nat's pretty adorable." Clint said with an amused smile, his arms crossed in front of him.

For a moment Steve had forgotten that Clint was there with them, so when Clint spoke Steve froze for a moment. What if Tasha wasn't prepared to see Clint?

But almost as quickly as his worries surface, they abated. "Bubby!" Tasha exclaimed in delight when she saw Clint.

"Hi Tasha!" Clint said, changing up his tone once he was talking with Tasha. It was like he and Steve had some switch that automatically flipped when talking to her: Like baby talk mode was activated or something. As a Little himself, Clint rarely thought other Littles were adorable, unlike Bigs who probably thought no Little wasn't adorable. Tasha though? She's probably the exception for him.

Seeing his baby sister now, Clint wanted nothing more than to pick her up, hug her and protect her from all the dangers of the world. A Little like her definitely had to be protected at all costs.

"Am I your bubby?" He asked with a smile as he approached the pair. As much as Clint wanted to carry Tasha too, he didn't want to take her away from Steve, so he decided to wait his turn.

"Bubby." Tasha confirmed before turning to look at Steve. "Daddy." She said before kissing him on the cheek.   
"Baby!" She then said as she patted herself with both of her hands.

"Wow, don't I have such a smart baby girl?" Steve all but gushed and if a toddler could beam with pride, Tasha was doing so now. Really, Steve would probably gush at anything that Tasha would do.

"Steve, I hate to break this moment you're having but I think you should probably get her changed." Clint interrupted once he noticed that Natasha was still in her regular clothes. Toddler with no diaper on was probably not a good thing.

"You're probably right." Steve said as he adjusted his hold on Tasha, just trying to make sure she's comfortable. "Will you be okay while I go and get her changed?"

"Mhm, I'm not dropped, Steve. I'll be fine." Clint said with an amused shake of his head. Steve had the tendency to be overprotective of his nephews and nieces even when aged, so Clint could only wonder how it would be with Nat. Well, he'd already seen glimpses of his overprotectiveness with Nat.

If Clint were Nat, that would probably drive him insane: But it's probably different with Nat. She's grown up her whole life practically alone, so this was a good change for her to have someone really take care of her like that. Nat would never admit it, but Clint knew that the thought of not being alone anymore relieved her more than she let on.

"There're changing rooms back near the nursery section, that should be the nearest one." Eleanor told Steve. "We can wait for you to get back, or we can meet you in the section for car seats."

"I think I can manage to find our way to the car seats." Steve said with a nod. "Thanks, Eleanor." He smiled before turning to go back the direction they came from.

As Steve carried Tasha to the changing rooms, he couldn't help but feel like things should be going uphill from here, right? Looking back at it now, he realized Nat was actually seeking him when she needed him: She wasn't pushing him away like he'd expected her to. On top of that, Tasha seemed extremely happy to see Clint too. Hopefully the rest of the team would get the same level of reception from his Little.

"What're you singing, baby?" Steve asked when he heard Tasha humming a song just as they reached the changing rooms.

"Twinkle 'winkle!" Tasha told Steve happily.

"Wow! Twinkle Twinkle? I don't think I ever heard that one before." Steve said. He shouldered open the door and locked it behind them once he got inside. "Can you sing it for daddy?"

"Otay! Tinkle 'winkle wittle staw!" Tasha started to sing and she sounded incredibly adorable.   
Steve didn't really understand the rest of her lyrics anymore--it was probably some remix, but she brought a huge smile to his face nonetheless.

"What chu awe!" Tasha sang the last lines just as Steve laid her down on top of the changing table.

"That was very good Tasha!" Steve praised his Little, even giving her a little tickle on the tummy. Tasha then squealed and squirmed from the onslaught, but Steve didn't want to torture her so he stopped and leaned down to give her a kiss on the nose.

"Again! Tinkle twinkle 'ittle staw!" Tasha sang again, this time she was clapping her hands to the beat, or so she was trying to.   
Steve let his Little be because at least this way, she wasn't fussing over a change: He even managed to get Tasha out of her jeans, into a fresh diaper, and into a pair of sweats before she could finish a third round of the Twinkle Twinkle remix.

"Is that my baby's favorite song?" Steve asked as he packed away their things into the backpack again before shouldering it and then reaching for Tasha.

"Uh uh." Tasha said with a shake of her head.

"What's Tasha's favorite song?" Steve asked as he fixed the way he was holding Tasha before moving to leave the changing room. He quite enjoyed talking to the toddler even though it was a bit hard to understand her sometimes.

"Itty bitty 'pidew up spout!" Tasha started to sing, making the itsy bitsy spider hand actions too while she was at it. "Down came wain an' wash 'pidew out!"

"Of course that's your favorite." Steve said with a chuckle before kissing the side of Tasha's head. The Little wasn't deterred though, as she continued to sing on their way to the car seat section to meet up with Clint and Eleanor.

"Daddy it bubby!" Tasha exclaimed when they'd rejoined Clint and Eleanor.

"Yeah baby, it's your big brother!" Steve said with proper enthusiasm and with a genuine smile. "Let's go and say hi." He said as he walked closer to Clint.

"Bubbyy!" Tasha practically cheered. Clint was talking with Eleanor, but when they heard Tasha the two of them turned towards her and Clint had one of the biggest smiles on his face.

"Hi Tasha! Are you having fun shopping?" He asked.

"Fun!" Tasha said with a smile and a clap of her hands. "Softies, bubby!"

"That's right, we got you looots of soft blankets." Clint said with a chuckle. He just wanted to squeeze the living daylights out of his best friend right now: She's so fluffy he's going to die!

"Mhm, and now we're going to get her special seat for the car." Steve said, lightly bouncing Tasha in his arms while he was at it.

"Tasha special chaiw?" Tasha asked before moving to stick her fingers in her mouth, but Steve quickly stopped her and shook his head.

"Your fingers can be really icky baby. No icky fingers in our mouths, okay?"

"Otaaaaay." Tasha said before pouting and Steve chuckled softly, making a mental note to get her some pacifiers today too.

"Let's get finished here so we can go to the fun parts of our trip." Steve said with a smile.   
Of course Steve wasn't going to just buy furniture today: Tasha needed a complete wardrobe and she obviously needed toys too.

"What fun daddy?" Tasha asked curiously, tilting her head slightly to the side in an adorable manner.

"You'll know soon if you behave for daddy, hm?" They'd already spent quite some time here and Steve didn't want to prolong their stay too much in case it'd tire Tasha out. He wanted Tasha fully awake for clothes and toy shopping.

"Tasha good giwl." Tasha said with a nod of her head.

"I know you are." Steve smiled and leaned in to kiss Tasha's nose again, making the toddler let out the most adorable giggle ever.   
He wanted to just play with Tasha and cuddle her, smother her with so much love but he snapped himself back into the present. They have plenty of time for that: Right now he needed to make sure his Little had everything she'd need.

Much to his delight, Tasha did behave well while they continued shopping for furniture. After they picked out her car seat they bought a couple of more essentials like baby gates, a stroller, a play pen--which Tasha was very excited about, so Steve couldn't wait to see how excited she'd be about actual toys to play with.

About an hour or so later, they were finally done and had everything paid for. Everything was brought to the counter by the parking lot so they didn't have to worry about their packages in the meantime. After giving Eleanor a generous tip for all her help, the three of them left with Steve still carrying Tasha in his arms.

"I can take her for a minute if you need, Steve." Clint said as they walked out of Littles 'R Us, though he had a feeling Steve didn't really want to let go of her.

"No it's fine, I got her." Yeah Clint knew that but hey, it was worth a shot. Plus, part of him wanted to try and hold Tasha too but of course he wasn't going to take Tasha from her heartmate.

"Daddy where go?" Tasha asked curiously, looking at Steve before looking around. Nat had been to this mall plenty of times before, but Tasha hadn't of course, and it looked like she was fascinated by everything she saw.

"We're going to buy you some pretty clothes." Steve said, trying his best to make it sound exciting because he really was looking forward to it. Some people may think it was silly of him, but he really did want to doll Tasha up. Yeah, he can be domestic like that too.

"Pink an' yellow an' gween an' puwple?" Tasha asked.

"Mhm, we can get you clothes in all those colors and more." Steve said with a smile, and he was glad he did: Tasha looked so surprised to learn she could all those that her eyes were as wide as saucers. It was quite a cute sight.

When they got to the store, Steve realized it may be harder now to keep Tasha in his arms. As soon as the Little saw all the colorful clothes around, she was trying desperately to squirm down from Steve's arms: So his Little's quite a shopaholic then, this should be interesting.

Like Littles 'R Us, this particular store catered to well, Littles. The store had virtually every article of clothing a Little of any age could need or want. Clint even frequented this store more times than he'd like to admit. What Steve liked about this Little clothing store in particular was that they divided the sections by ages only: Other stores would divide by gender then by age which Steve found pointless and counterproductive.

He came to realize that when he first went shopping with Bobbi while she was dropped. It was the day Steve swore he could feel his legs falling off, and that was saying something. The girl dragged Steve back and forth between sections because obviously Bobbi wasn't going to be satisfied with _just_ the girls' section. Their supposed "quick shopping trip" turned out to be a 5-hour marathon of Bobbi dragging Steve all over the store.

Today though, Steve had a feeling the presence of a girl-boy separation wouldn't have mattered anyway, taking into consideration Tasha's earlier shopping decisions. Tasha seemed to have very different tastes from Nat, which was quite interesting to see.

"Okay okay, daddy's putting you down." Steve said soothingly as he carefully set Tasha down on her own feet. "But Tasha's going to hold daddy's hand the whole time, okay?"

"Otay daddy." Tasha smiled sweetly.

"If you see anything you like, just tell daddy or bubby." Steve said, and it didn't take long for Tasha to pick out her first dress.

"Tasha wan' dis daddy! P'eaaaaaase?" Tasha was holding up a simple enough dress that had a pink top and flowy floral skirt: Definitely not something aged Nat would have picked out even on her death bed.

"Well I think that's a really pretty dress, we can get that." Steve couldn't really say no--not like he even thought about saying no. But Tasha's sweet "p'ease" at the end really had him roped in.   
"Let's grab you a few more clothes and then you can try them all on, okay?"

"Otay!" Tasha said with a toothy grin. Steve let her pick out five more outfits first, all of different kinds ranging from rompers to skirts. He intended on buying an entire wardrobe for Tasha, but he knew it wasn't realistic to expect the toddler to try on every single item so he decided to let Tasha pick one of each kind now. At least this way, they have a basis on what size clothes to get, and if Tasha would actually wear them.

"She seems to really like that dress." Clint said with an amused smile as they walked to the fitting rooms. Tasha was still holding onto Steve's hand, but with her free arm she was hugging the dress close to her.

"I think pink's her favorite color." Steve said in observation, though by now he was actually sure. Almost everything Tasha picked out from the previous store had pink.

"Gee, you think?" Clint asked sarcastically. "Interesting to note that she seems like a completely different person when dropped."

"Yeah, especially since the rest of you mirror a lot of your own aged personalities when dropped." Steve pointed out. "You're still as mischievous as ever." He said with a roll of his eyes, but he had an amused smile on his face.

"What can I say? The awesome never left me." Clint chuckled, to which Steve shook his head in amusement.

"Do you want to help us try these out?" Steve asked Clint once they got to the dressing rooms.

"I don't know if those would fit you, Steve." Clint teased, making Tasha giggle.

"Bubby silly!" Tasha said. "Tasha, bubby. No daddy." She said with a shake of her head.

"Really? These aren't daddy's clothes?" Clint asked. He crouched down a bit too so he can talk with Tasha better, something aged Nat obviously wouldn't have appreciated but Tasha didn't seem to mind.

"Uh uh, but Tasha can shawe." Tasha said with a sweet smile.

"Well that's very sweet of you Tasha." Clint said, not even having it in him anymore to tease Steve about that because honestly it was just sweet. "Should we go and see if these pretty clothes fit you?" He didn't have to ask twice, because Tasha nodded her head enthusiastically and practically dragged the two of them to the nearest vacant fitting room.

"Which one should we try--"

Before Steve could finish his question, Tasha was already holding up the dress she'd picked out and was jumping up and down. "Daddy daddy dis one!"

"I think she wants to try the dress, Steve." Clint pointed out with a hint of amusement in his voice as he hung up the rest of the clothes first.

"Okay baby, let's get this dress on you." Steve said with a chuckle before crouching down in front of Tasha.   
He got his Little undressed into just her diaper and slipped his finger into the leg hole, checking it just in case but she was dry for now. Tasha probably thought Steve was taking too long, because the Little tried to dress herself up but only succeeded to get her head stuck in one of the arm holes.

"Let daddy help you." Steve smiled and easily fixed her up before zipping the back. "Wow don't I have such a pretty baby girl?"

It was true though: Nat already is naturally beautiful, but it was as if her letting go and dropping, just enjoying life as a child brought this glow to her. It was subtle while she was aged, probably because she still often looked worried about her situation, but Steve still noticed it. He had a feeling more people and even Nat would pick up on the change once she gets into the rhythm of her new life.

Right now though, with Nat dropped and nothing but smiles and giggles, the glow was more evident. Nat exuded beauty as an adult, but as a dropped Little she was the personification of joy. So much so that both Clint and Steve just wanted to bottle her up right now and save her for the rainy days. Steve would bet that his Little could get anyone to coo and melt from cuteness just by spending five seconds with her.

"P'etty dwess?" Tasha asked, twisting left and right so the skirt of her dress was flowing nicely.

"Mhm, pretty dress for a pretty girl." Steve smiled.

"No mowe daddy, Tasha wan' dis." Tasha told Steve. She even hugged herself as if that would stop Steve from taking the dress from her.

"Baby we need to get you more clothes. Let's just try on these other ones, and then you can wear that again, okay?" Steve tried to bargain with the toddler. 

"Otaaay." Tasha relented but with a pout. She put her arms down now though and Steve crouched back down in front of her to get her undressed.

"Can you pass me the romper, Clint?" Steve asked as he set aside the dress, making sure Tasha saw where he was putting it.

"Sure, here you go." Clint said as he handed Steve the frilly gray romper with little polka dots. It was quite odd for Clint to see his best friend try on these kinds of clothes, but he thought it was adorable nonetheless.

Unlike with the dress, the rest of the clothes were a bit of a chore to get on Tasha, particularly because all the toddler wanted to do was to put the dress back on. After each article of clothing Tasha would try to grab the dress but her efforts were easily thwarted by the two men. Everything seemed to fit right though, and Tasha seemed to have no objections about any of the clothes so Steve decided they could most likely just work their way out from there.

"See? That wasn't so bad, right?" Steve practically cooed as he helped Tasha out of her overalls.

"Tasha haff p'etty c'othes." Tasha said with a smile as she stepped out of her overalls while holding onto Steve's shoulders, but Clint held her by the hips anyway because Tasha was still a little clumsy on her feet.

"Yes you do, and we'll get you even more pretty clothes later." Steve said.   
Once Tasha was undressed, Steve stood up to put the clothes back on the hanger and grab Tasha's dress. He ripped the tag off it first but made sure to keep it in his pocket so they can pay for it later.

"Okay, time to put on your--Tasha?" As Steve turned back around to face his Little, he found Tasha crouching down on the floor too. "What're you doing baby?"

"Nothin' daddy." Tasha said softly but without looking at Steve.

"Well, can you stand up so we can put on your pretty dress?" Steve asked.

"Uh-uh, latew." Tasha said, her voice sounding a little strained.

"Steve, I think she's busy." Clint said. He was also observing the Little from the side and he had a hunch about what was going on. Frankly, he wasn't sure if he found it amusing or what.

"What do you mean?" Steve frowned in confusion.   
Before Clint could answer him though, Steve finally heard it: Tasha was letting out the tiniest of grunts. It took a few seconds for Steve to understand what that meant, but when he finally did...

" _Oh_." was all Steve managed to say.   
Again, Tasha's the first toddler Little he's encountered, so all the Littles that Steve's met are potty trained. Of course all this shouldn't have been surprising for Steve since he has been putting Tasha in diapers, and Nat's already woken up wet before. Somehow though, he still wasn't prepared for this.

"Yup. I'm taking this is the first time this happened?" Clint asked in an amused tone as Tasha continued to have her movement.

"Yeah you can say that." Steve said sheepishly, moving a hand up to scratch the back of his head. "This is going to be the first time I'll actually change her."

"Well at least there's nowhere to go but up from here." Clint chuckled before wrinkling his nose when the smell finally caught up to him.

"Daddy dwess?" Tasha asked softly as she stood back up. If that made Steve think she was already done though, boy was he wrong. Tasha stood with her legs slightly apart, her potty face on, and still letting out the occasional tiny grunt.

"Finish going potty and then we can put it on, okay?" Steve told her gently.

Luckily, Tasha didn't seem to find it appalling that Steve knew she was going potty. She was just disappointed that she delayed wearing her dress but she did nothing more than frown and nod her head. By the time Tasha was done, her diaper was sagging heavily between her legs but she looked like she was feeling better too.

"All done." Tasha announced before putting her arms up, wanting to get the dress on already.

"Thank you for telling daddy." Steve praised, and he wasted no more time so he helped Tasha into the dress yet again. "There we go, as beautiful as a princess." Steve smiled.

"A princess who needs a change." Clint pointed out, and Steve really couldn't argue against that.

"Bubby's right." Steve said with a soft chuckle. "Let's get you a clean bum before we look for more clothes."

"Tasha c'ean." Tasha pouted, but she didn't fight when Steve lifted her up into his arms.

"I think Tasha has a stinky bum." Steve pointed out with an amused smile. He'd already packed Tasha's own clothes into the bag, so Clint just picked up the clothes they'd tried on before they left the fitting room.

"I'll meet you two back in the toddler area?" Clint said. Although he loved Natasha, he was not going to volunteer to change her diapers if it wasn't necessary.

"Yeah, just give me five minutes. If you see anything you think she'd like, feel free to grab it." Steve said with a nod before turning around to go where he saw the toilets were.

"Bye bye bubby!" Tasha said. She'd turned in Steve's arms so she could see Clint and wave to him as Steve walked away.

"Bye Tasha! I'll see you later." Clint waved back with a smile. Even with a messy bum, Clint couldn't help but smile at how adorable she is.

The restrooms weren't that hard to find, thankfully, and since they were at a Little store they had family restrooms as well. Upon entering the family restroom, Steve saw that they had an adult-sized changing table, which was great because he didn't have the changing mat they'd bought with him right now.

"Okay baby, let's get this messy bum all cleaned up." Steve moved to lay Tasha down on the changing table and was happy to note that Tasha didn't cling to him or fight. Once Tasha was settled, Steve took off the backpack so he could get everything he needed, and by the time he turned back to Tasha he was met with an adorable sight.

"What are those Tasha?" Steve asked. Tasha currently had her feet up because she was reaching for and playing with them. It was then Steve realized that probably wasn't very hygienic given she was wearing shoes, so he quickly tried to pull Tasha's hands away from her feet.

"Feets!" Tasha said proudly.

"That's right! Those are Tasha's feet." Steve gushed as he grabbed some wipes to clean Tasha's hands with. "And these are..?" He asked as he started to wipe Tasha's hands.

"Han's!" Tasha said with a smile.

"Very good Tasha! That's right." Steve praised his Little. "Such a smart little girl." He said before giving Tasha a kiss on the nose, making the toddler giggle.

Changing Tasha's diaper wasn't the most pleasant experience for Steve: Tasha may be a toddler Little but she still had an adult body, albeit she's small, but still. Honestly though, he found that he didn't really mind the mess because even as Tasha laid there with a messy bum, she still managed to bring a smile to Steve's face with her antics. It didn't take too long and soon, Tasha was and smelled like a clean and fresh baby girl.

"There we go! All nice and clean." Steve lifted Tasha up and off the changing table, but the toddler was squirming so Steve gently set her down on her own feet.

"Tasha walk." Tasha informed Steve.

"Okay. Daddy has to clean up first, and then we'll walk together." Steve said.

He made sure that his Little was alright before taking care of their mess, but occasionally checking to make sure Tasha wasn't going anywhere too. For her part, the Little was just twirling around and hopping about as Steve packed away their things and washed his hands. Steve even heard her singing Twinkle Twinkle again at some point. Once everything was settled, Steve took Tasha's hand in his and together they walked back to the toddler section of the store. It may have taken them longer since Tasha was still a bit unsteady on her feet, but it was nice to walk with his Little.

When they rejoined Clint, Steve wasn't even surprised to see that Clint had already gotten Tasha quite a number of clothes. "Look at this Tasha!" He was holding up footie pajamas, but they weren't any regular footie pajamas: They're unicorn ones!

"Jammies!" Tasha exclaimed, sounding incredibly excited about pajamas though it did seem warranted. The unicorn pajamas looked pretty cool and comfy in Steve's opinion. It was complete with a hood and everything! "Daddy Tasha wan'! P'eaaaaaase?"

"You can have them baby." Steve said with a smile, and Tasha actually cheered as Clint gave her the pajamas to hold. "Do you want kitty ones too?" Steve saw that there was a rack full of footie pajamas so he reached for one and saw that it was a cat version.

"Meow!" Tasha smiled, and Steve took that as a yes so he put that in the cart too. They went on for a while, combing through all the aisles and making sure they got practically everything Tasha wanted and needed. By the time they were done, their shopping cart had nothing but a mountain of clothes. Steve feared that Tasha might grow tired, but she still continued to surprise him. The toddler was still happily bouncing about by the time they paid for everything (her dress included).

"Baby can you guess what we're going to do next?" Steve turned to Tasha, bending down a bit so she can see him better.

"Wha' daddy?" Tasha asked, even tilting her head slightly to the side.

"We're going to buy you some toys!" Steve said with proper enthusiasm and Tasha's eyes instantly lit up at that.

"Tasha haff toys?" Tasha asked in a small voice, as if she couldn't believe what she was hearing.

"Of course Tasha's going to have toys." Steve said with a soft smile. "Your nursery needs a little play area, doesn't it? We need to add your toys to the living room, too."

"Tasha toys Tasha toys!" Tasha cheered, jumping up and down and clapping her hands in delight.

"I think she's excited, Steve." Clint pointed out in an amused tone.

"Gee, you think?" Steve chuckled. They had their bags brought again to the counter in the parking lot to be dealt with later, so right now Steve just took Tasha's hand again so they could walk together to the toy store. About halfway through, Tasha even reached for Clint's hand so she was walking between them, happily swinging both of their hands too.

If the clothing store was big, then the toy store was just _humongous_. The clothing store just occupied one floor, but the toys occupied not one, but two! It was every Little's heaven on earth.

"Daddy daddy many toys!" Tasha exclaimed, and she was practically shaking with excitement as they walked inside.

"Wow you're right! There're toys everywhere!" Steve gasped. "Should we look around and see what we can find?" He didn't really have to ask though, because before he could even finish his sentence Tasha was already dragging both Steve and Clint with her.

She had to be nudged towards the right direction because she was looking at toys for older kids at first, but they eventually found the toddler section. When they did, her excitement amplified if that was even possible. The toddler section was filled with different kinds of toys: From stuffed animals, to educational toys, soft blocks, and even mobiles you could push or tug around.

Tasha was just standing still for a few moments, probably taking everything in. Soon though, the toddler was back to dragging Clint and Steve all over the place. Often, she didn't even have to ask Steve if she could get something: A lot of the time Steve would just automatically put something in the cart if Tasha looked remotely interested in it.

"You really are spoiling her rotten today, huh?" Clint said with both eyebrows raised. About thirty minutes into their toy shopping spree, the cart was already almost full.

"I just want to make sure she's happy." Steve said sheepishly. "And it's not like I'm going to do this so often. She needs to equip her play area."

"No need to get defensive, Tony was just as bad as you were when we first became heartmates." Clint chuckled as he helped Tasha put a pack of soft blocks into the cart.

"I can only imagine." Steve said, and he couldn't help but smile at the mention of Tony. He shook his head to himself though because now was not the time for that. Right now, he had Tasha to focus on. Nat would always come first in his books from now on, and honestly, he didn't mind: Not even the slightest.

"I done daddy." Tasha smiled up at Steve. "T'anshu." She said sweetly before stepping closer to Steve and giving him a hug.

"You're welcome baby." Steve smiled and hugged her back, giving her a kiss on the top of her head too. "But I think there's one more thing we need to get."

"Wa'dat?" Tasha asked curiously, still hugging Steve.

"I think we need to get you a special friend." Steve nodded to the right where there was an entrance to a build-a-bear. Yes, the toy store had its own build-a-bear inside. "Should we go and see what special friend you can have?"

Steve really did plan to end their trip with build-a-bear, because he wanted Tasha to have a special comfort item from him. Every Little needed one, even Clint did though he'd deny it to his grave. He only ever brought it out when it was just him and Tony.

"Tasha wan' fwend." Tasha said with a nod of her head, and that was enough confirmation for Steve so he lifted Tasha up into his arms. The toddler didn't protest, so Steve carried her towards build-a-bear with Clint following close behind with the cart of toys. This part of the store was a little more crowded and Tasha unconsciously tightened her hold on Steve.

"It's okay baby, daddy's got you." Steve soothed, and Tasha nodded her head in response but she didn't loosen her hold on Steve. Instead of trying to convince her again that she'll be okay, Steve brought her over to the wall with all the different stuffed animals they had. Hopefully that'd distract her from the all the hustle and bustle going about.

"Look baby, we can pick any of these animals to be your friend." Steve told Tasha, bouncing her slightly in his arms. "Do you see anyone you like?"

Tasha didn't say anything in response, and for a while Steve was worried that she was too bothered by all the people around. It was Clint though who managed to reassure Steve that she was fine: By the look on her face, she was probably busy contemplating her choices. That was validated a few moments later.

"Da' one daddy." Tasha said, pointing to the pastel swirl kitty.

"You mean this one?" Steve asked as he moved closer to the said cat, just to make sure. When Tasha nodded her head, he grabbed an unstuffed one and Tasha just looked confused. "We're going to build your friend, baby. The kitty will look like that when we're done." He said reassuringly.

Tasha still looked a bit unsure, but she nodded her head anyway because she trusted her daddy.

"I think it's time for Tasha to pick out a sound for her friend." Clint piped in.

"Sound?" Tasha asked, and Clint nodded his head.

"Yeah, you can choose if you want to make your kitty sing or meow, or make any other sound." Clint said enthusiastically, as if it was the most exciting thing in the world; and it helped. Tasha was smiling again and looked even more excited now than she did a few seconds ago.

"Lead the way, Clint." Steve chuckled. He knew for a fact that Clint's toy made sounds (as well as Daisy's and the rest of the bunch's, really) and it sometimes drove Tony nuts, but hey: If it made Tasha happy, he'd gladly let her choose a sound for her friend.

When they got to the section for sounds, Clint showed Tasha how she can find the one she likes best. It didn't seem like she wanted down from Steve's arms yet though, which was fine with Steve. He just bent down a little so Tasha could reach everything and hear all the sounds. She was taking this decision quite seriously because she was going back and forth among sounds she'd already listened to a few times. Steve and Clint presumed she was trying to narrow it down.

"Daddy it b'oken." Tasha told Steve. She'd come across a new button somehow and it wasn't making any sounds so Steve looked closer to investigate. It happened to be the option that allowed them to record their own sound. Tasha couldn't really read yet, which explained why she probably thought it was broken.

"That's a special one, Tasha. This lets us record anything we want, see?" Steve explained. He pressed the right button to start recording, and he leaned closer to the mic so his voice would be clear. "Daddy loves you, Tasha." Once the machine signaled that it was done, Steve played the recording to show Tasha what he meant; and when Tasha heard her daddy's voice come from the machine, the toddler smiled widely.

"Tasha wan' dat one daddy." Tasha said with a big smile.

Steve's heart swelled at that, and he nodded his head in response. "Okay, we'll get you that one." He smiled and kissed the side of Tasha's head.

After that, Steve and Clint let her pick a scent for her toy and she obviously went with "chawbewwy", no surprise there: The decision was almost instantaneous. By the time they lined up at the filling station, there weren't that many people around anymore and Tasha seemed relatively calmer, she was more excited now about getting her new friend. In fact, when it was their turn she didn't even fight when Steve moved to set her down.

"Hi sweetheart, what's your name?" The build-a-bear employee asked Tasha with a kind smile.

"I Tasha." Tasha said in a small, shy voice.

"Tasha? Well that's a pretty name for a very pretty girl." She said. "My name's Tori, and I think I'll be needing your help to bring your special friend to life today. You think you can do that?"

"Tasha good helper." Tasha said with a nod, sounding a bit more confident this time.

"That's great! Can I borrow your friend for a little while?" Tori asked, and Tasha nodded her head and obediently handed over her toy which Tori then prepared to stuff.

"You see this pedal here, Tasha?" Tori pointed, and Tasha looked down and nodded her head. "You're going to do a very big job: I want you to step on that pedal when I say go, and then let go when I say stop."

"Otay! Tasha do." Tasha said, and she looked like she stood a little straighter; as if the thought of having this "big responsibility" on her shoulders made her all the more determined. Steve couldn't help but smile at the thought, and his Little did look so focused as she worked with Tori to stuff her new friend. Once the cat was all stuffed, Tori handed the toy back to Tasha.

"Can you give her a hug and see if she's all soft enough for you?" She asked with a smile, and Tasha eagerly nodded her head and hugged the cat close to her chest.

"All soft." Tasha confirmed.

"Okay, now it's time to give your friend a heart." Tori said as she took out the container that had all the felt hearts in it. She took back the cat for the meantime and held the container out to Tasha. "Go pick one out sweetheart."

Tasha looked back at Steve first, and Steve nodded his head and smiled in encouragement, so Tasha reached in and picked out a pink one.

"That's a very good choice, Tasha." Tori praised. "Now, can you give your heart a few taps to give it a little beat?" She asked before holding a palm out and showing Tasha just what to do.

Tasha looked confused for a moment, but she was quick to pick up on the instructions. After a moment, she held her palm with the heart out and tapped the heart with the fingers on her other hand.

"Very good! Now rub the heart on your arms so that your friend knows how to give the best hugs." Again, Tori showed Tasha what to do and Tasha easily followed her instructions again: This time, a smile was starting to form on her face.

"Nini hugs." Tasha said, already having a name for her stuffed friend.

"Mhm, Nini's going to give the very best hugs by the looks of it." Tori smiled. "Now, rub the heart on your head so Nini's smart just like you!" This time Tasha didn't need to be shown, she immediately went to rub the heart on her head.   
It was just then Steve realized he should have probably recorded all this. He was about to chastise himself for forgetting, but he almost sighed in relief when he saw that Clint had his phone out and was already recording the entire thing.

"Can you do a little dance so Nini's all nice and silly?" Tori smiled, and Tasha of course obliged. She started doing a little silly dance while giggling which got all three adults smiling. "Oh! Be careful sweetheart." Tori said when Tasha almost lost balance, but Steve was quick to reach out and steady her.

"Now give the heart a biiiiig kiss so Nini knows lots of love." Tori instructed, and Tasha did as she was told. She gave the heart a big kiss before she turned back to Steve.

"Daddy kissies?" Tasha asked as she held the heart up to Steve. Steve had loooots of love, so Tasha wanted Steve to give the heart some kissies too.

Steve didn't even think twice and took the heart for a moment so he can give it his kiss too. "There we go, now Nini has lots of love." He told Tasha with a smile as he handed the heart back to her.

"Okay, now come on here and put the heart inside Nini, sweetie." Tori gestured for Tasha to come over. She was holding Nini such that the open part was facing upwards so Tasha could place the heart inside. Tori had to help her a little, but eventually they got the toy all ready to be stitched up, with the scent and sound all inside already too.

"Here you go Tasha." Tori said with a smile as she handed the cat to Tasha after stitching it up.

"What do we say baby?" Steve prompted his little. Tasha for her part was smiling so wide as she hugged her special friend close.

"Tanchu Towi." Nat said, as adorable as could be with her new friend in her arms.

"You're very welcome. Give Nini lots of hugs, okay?" Tori smiled.

"Uhhuh." Tasha nodded her head and smiled before turning to Steve. "Daddy look! Bubby!" Tasha said as she held up her new friend to show Steve and Clint.

"Wow that's such a pretty kitty! Is this Nini?" Steve asked, even gasping at the end.

"Uhhuh, it Nini." Tasha confirmed before pulling the cat back into her arms. "Tanchu daddy." Tasha smiled sweetly. She was hugging her new friend and twisting left and right as she did so.

"Anything for you baby." Steve smiled and leaned down to kiss the top of her head. And really, Steve figured he really would do anything for Natasha. 


	12. Chapter 12

It was almost late afternoon by the time Steve was buckling Tasha back into her car seat while Clint helped load the car. Tasha fell asleep about half an hour ago while they were picking out furniture for Nat's regular room because evidently, looking at lamps, dressers, and all that other stuff was boring for a two year old; which was fine with Steve. He and Clint already had plenty of fun with Tasha considering they still did some grocery shopping after build-a-bear.

Now, Steve was convinced they had practically everything Tasha would need: Tasha looked so cozy right now in her car seat with a pacifier between her lips, Nini (who was now clothed in a dress similar to hers) held comfortably in her arms. Steve even draped his jacket over her to make sure she won't get cold. He reached out to brush some stray hair away from her face before kissing her on the forehead and climbing out. He and Clint finished loading everything into the car and soon, the two were taking their seats in front.

"This went a lot better than I expected it to." Clint told Steve as he got buckled in next to him. He expected they'd spent most of the time with Natasha sulking and trailing behind them, so shopping with Tasha was a pleasant surprise.

"And I'm glad it did." Steve said with a smile before starting the car. "Tasha seemed to have fun. I just hope Nat would think the same when she ages up."

"Knowing Nat I wouldn't be surprised if she feels horrible about it for a while." Clint said. "But I think she'll come around. She's stubborn, but she's smart. Plus, she has you."

"Yeah, just gotta be there for her." Steve said softly before pulling them out of parking. "Hopefully with our vacation coming up she'll warm up to this new life more."

"Ah that's right, you two have plenty of time off." Clint would be lying if he said he wasn't jealous. With their crazy lives, even the shortest days off were a treasure to them.

"I'm actually surprised Fury didn't veto it or something with how many days we're given." Steve chuckled.

"It's nice though. I don't think Nat's ever taken more than a day off at a time since she got to SHIELD." Clint would often tell Nat to take some time off, but the woman was living and breathing SHIELD duties. "When're you two heading off?"

Right, leaving for that vacation that Steve was completely unprepared for. Save for some planned activities and a place to stay, there wasn't anything else concrete about their vacation yet.

"I wanted to get things settled down at home before we go, so maybe in two days." Apart from needing more time to better plan their trip, this would give Steve time to set up everything they bought today. That way they wouldn't have to worry about it when they come home from their trip. "Hey, can I ask you something?" They were out of the parking lot by then and were already driving back to the compound.

"Go ahead, shoot."

"You know Nat better than I do," It was difficult for Steve to admit, but he knew it was true, "do you think she'll be overwhelmed if some of you guys joined us on vacation?" It was one of the many things Steve was considering for the trip, and now seemed like as good a time as any to ask.

"That depends, I guess." Clint said after thinking about it. Nat's a bit complicated, so that only means she comes with complicated solutions. "On how you lay it out, I mean. I know that you obviously won't just surprise her with us showing at your doorstep the day you plan on leaving, so what did you have in mind?"

"I don't know." Steve sighed. They'd hit a red light which Steve was grateful for because now he could focus more attention on his own thoughts. "Since I want to be sure she's comfortable with it, I guess the first step would be to actually reacquaint her with everybody so vacation won't be the first touch point, right?"

"Why don't we have a team dinner or breakfast again?" Clint suggested. "It won't be anything too crazy, and she'll be in the comfort of your home. If anything goes bad you can just kick us all out or something--which I hope won't happen but you know, better to have a contingency plan." He shrugged.

"Yeah, I'll talk to her about that." Steve said just as the light turned green. "I want to make sure she's really okay with seeing the others already. I mean, when I called you I had the smallest hunch that she'd be okay with it even if I didn't ask her... But I don't want to risk it, you know? I feel like we're finally making progress, although slow. I just don't want to jeopardize it."

"You're right. See? You knew the answer to your own question all along." Clint teased lightly. He could tell that Steve was feeling a little unsure about himself: They all felt that way the first few days after bonding with their heartmates. Didn't mean that Clint was going to let Steve soldier through those feelings alone though just because they all did. "I'll take care of the team--make sure they don't swarm Nat or whatever in case she agrees to it. You just focus on Nat."

"Thanks Clint. I appreciate it, really." Steve said with sincere gratitude as he glanced at Clint to give him a brief smile.

After that, the two of them talked quietly until they arrived at the compound. There were a lot of bags to bring up, so Steve was grateful that Clint volunteered to help especially considering that Tasha was asleep. They weren't comfortable leaving Tasha on her own while they went back and forth to get bags, so they took turns in keeping an eye on her while the other went back to the car. They had Tasha tucked into her bed with pillows surrounding her so she won't roll off. She looked content laying there, Nini in her arms and a soother planted between her lips.

"Hey Steve, the last of the bags are up." Clint said quietly from the doorway. Steve was sitting on the edge of the bed, gently playing with Nat's hair but he looked up when Clint arrived.

"Thank you, Clint, you were really a big help today." Steve said gratefully.

"Hey, it's no big. Both of you are family so I'm happy to help." Clint assured. "But I think I need to get going. I have a few things I need to take care of before the day ends--if you do need any more help though, just give me a call."

"I'm the Big here, shouldn't I be the one saying that?" Steve had a hint of amusement in his voice. Honestly he just wasn't used to being on the receiving end of help when it came to matters like this. For the past years, it's always uncle Steve helping the team with their heartmates; uncle Steve stepping in when the Littles needed someone besides their Bigs to listen.

Clint had a feeling Steve was thinking that, so he chuckled and shook his head in amusement. "Even Bigs need help from Littles sometimes, Steve, and I'm more than happy to give it." After everything Steve's done for him, for them, it was the right thing to do.

Before Clint left Steve thanked him profusely once again. With the promise of Steve talking to Natasha about a team get together, Clint said goodbye for the day. It's been a long day, and even with the super soldier serum Steve still felt worn out; but there was a lot to do. There was no telling when Nat would drop next or if Nat would wake up dropped. He had to make sure that his apartment would be safe and baby-proofed in time. With that, he carefully got up from the bed and made sure once more that Tasha was alright before leaving the room to baby-proof his apartment.

It was a little under an hour later when Natasha finally came to. The last thing she remembered was trying out that godforsaken high chair, so waking up in her bed left her slightly disoriented--until it hit her. All the memories of the past couple of hours came crashing down, and so did her embarrassment.

Not only did she drop in front of Steve, she dropped in front of Steve _and Clint!_ Yes, Clint would eventually see her dropped, but she was hoping it would happen on her own terms. Not like this. She wasn't prepared for Clint to see Tasha--and oh gods did she really mess herself in front of them? At that memory Natasha found herself groaning and covering her face with a pillow. 

But then Natasha thought back to the afternoon she had. Pushing past the initial embarrassment, it was actually a refreshing experience. Nat may even go so far as to call it a happy one. Steve's and Clint's smiling faces flashed in her head, the comfort she felt when Steve would hold her, and the warm feeling she got in her chest whenever she saw Steve genuinely happy: Is this how things are really supposed to be? Time and time again she was told in the Red Room that dropping to her Little age would only cause her misery, burden those around her. That didn't seem to be the case right now, though. Was everything she learned about her Little side a lie?

Natasha was too caught up in her thoughts that she didn't even realize she was absentmindedly fiddling with Nini until she accidentally pressed the cat's paw and Steve's voice filled the room.

 _"Daddy loves you, Tasha."_ That shouldn't have been able to bring tears to Natasha's eyes, but it did; and against her better judgment (or so at least she thought), Natasha hugged the toy close to her chest and closed her eyes tight. The amount of comfort she received from hugging the cat should embarrass her, but right now she didn't care.

Her mind was in a flurry of thoughts about self-doubts, her insecurities; but they were battled by the comfort that the previous hours brought. Countless times people have told her that a lot of things she learned from the Red Room should be taken with a grain of salt, that not everything she picked up from her stay there should well, stay with her. It was hard for her to take this in during her early days in SHIELD, but now-- _especially_ now, she feels the need to take these words to heart.

The sound of a door creaking open snapped Natasha out of her thoughts. Instead of pushing Nini away like she wanted to, she found herself instinctively holding the stuffed cat tighter in her arms.

"Tasha?" Steve spoke softly as he approached the bed. Just by looking at Natasha, he could tell that the Little was already awake. Why she was just lying there though, he didn't quite understand.

"No, it's me." Nat found herself responding albeit reluctantly as she opened her eyes to look at Steve. For whatever reason, she prepared herself to see a look of disappointment or disgust on his face. She saw none of that.

Instead, Steve had the on most comforting of smiles as he approached the bed and took a seat on the edge. "Did you sleep well?"

That was it? "Yeah, I guess." Natasha still had Nini clutched tightly in her arms, and Steve frowned slightly when he noticed how tense Natasha seemed.

"Well you did have a pretty long day. That nap was overdue." Steve chuckled. He wanted to ask Natasha how she felt after everything, but he also wanted to see if she'll initiate the conversation herself. If Natasha wasn't ready to talk about it, he won't push it. She just woke up from her longest drop yet, so Steve will let her go about this at her own pace.

"Yeah, I'm sorry about that." Nat said softly, thinking that by "long day" Steve meant it was a hassle for him. That thought stung, but she tried not to let it show.

"What? Why are you saying sorry?" It was Steve's turn to frown again.

"You said it was a long day." Natasha pointed out with a frown. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to tire you."

"Nat, by long day I meant that literally. We spent quite some time shopping." Steve clarified. "And yes I'm tired, but it's the good kind of tired. We finally got you everything you'll need and we both had fun while we were at it--well, at least I had fun?" Steve was quick to amend. He didn't want to assume the same for Nat.

"You did?" The disbelief in Natasha's voice was pretty clear, and she winced when she realized that. Can't be a little more subtle, Nat?

"Of course I did. I got to spend time with you and you seemed pretty happy, too." Steve said with a small smile. "And I have to admit, it felt good to spoil my own Little this time instead of my nieces and nephews." He said with a chuckle.

 _His_ Little. That's right, she was Steve's Little, and he was her Big. Thinking about it again managed to bring a smile to Natasha's face. "I had fun too." She admitted shyly, and that was enough to get Steve's smile to widen even more.

"That makes me happy to hear." It really did. For a moment Steve thought that Nat would be horrified by the memory of dropping for so long, so this was incredibly good news for him. "I think we can get your rooms set up soon. The furniture should arrive by tomorrow."

"You did buy quite a lot." Nat pointed out and she actually had an amused smile on her face. She was trying her best to be more positive about the situation because she knew that it wasn't just her wellbeing on the line here, it was also Steve's. The heartmate connection affected Steve as much as it did her.

"I told you: I was excited to be spoiling my own Little for a change." Steve chuckled, but he did look a little bashful. He really was just excited to finally have a heartmate. Even though he and Natasha bonded when Nat first dropped, it only sunk in with Steve earlier that day. Nat was his to take care of--not just Tasha, but also Nat.

"Yeah, well thank you. I just hope Tasha doesn't go all spoiled brat mode on you ever." Natasha smiled, and a blush made its way to her cheeks when she realized she was talking about her Little side so conversationally.

"I doubt that's going to happen. Tasha's the sweetest Little I've ever known." The sincerity of Steve's words got to Nat and she had to do her best to will the tears away.

"You're just saying that because we're heartmates." Natasha realized that it felt good to acknowledge their relationship out loud. Maybe it was all part of her being more accepting of her situation. It finally occurred to her that she should probably sit up so she can talk with Steve better. The moment she did though, she winced. Of course she had to wake up wet again.

"Well yes, but it's also true." Steve chuckled. "You okay?" He asked when he saw the wince.

"I'm fine, it's just, I guess some parts of this whole toddler thing will take a lot of getting used to." Natasha said vaguely, and Steve nodded in understanding. The discomfort in Nat's expression and the way she kept shifting around was enough for Steve to be able to piece it all together.

"How about I leave you for a moment so you can get cleaned up?" Steve said as gently as possible. He first thought about skirting around the situation, but Natasha had to know that she can talk to him about anything, and that nothing was too embarrassing to be brought up. "I already started on dinner so it should be ready by the time you're done."

"You cooked again?" Of course that was what Natasha chose to focus on.

"What do you mean? We need to eat, Nat. Of course I'm cooking again." Steve pointed out, slightly amused by Natasha's question.

"Yeah but I mean, you could have just ordered food. I know you're tired." Nat clarified. She didn't want Steve to get too tired especially on her account. Takeout meals weren't an issue for her, but evidently Steve wasn't quite fond of them. 

"You know I like cooking, Nat. And ever since we became teammates I noticed you have take out almost everyday. I just thought I could change that, you know?" It was Steve's turn to blush. Maybe he was getting too into this whole heartmate thing? "I figured a home-cooked meal's better than takeout."

"I could help next time." Natasha insisted. She didn't want Steve to pull all the weight in their relationship, but she still appreciated all of Steve's actions nonetheless.

"I know." Steve smiled. "I'll go check on dinner, and I'll meet you in the dining room once you're ready, okay?"

Natasha knew it was ridiculous of her to feel anxious about Steve leaving the room, but she did. Steve probably sensed her nerves because he suddenly had a look of concern on his face, so Natasha spoke before he could start to worry. "Alright, I'll be quick so I can help." She smiled. She told herself that was the real reason, but part of her knew it was so she wouldn't be separated from him for long.

"Take your time, it's okay." Steve said with a reassuring smile. At that, Steve finally stood up and left to give Natasha some privacy to get herself cleaned up.

True to her word, Natasha got cleaned up and dressed into her regular clothes in no more than five minutes. Even with her speed, Steve was already done making dinner by then and the table just had to be set, which Nat was happy to help with. Soon, both of them were seated across from each other at the table. Although Nat would have preferred sitting next to Steve, she chose to stay quiet in case Steve would find her too needy.

"Clint had fun today too, you know?"

"Yeah I saw him buy some toys for himself too." Nat shrugged as she cut her steak and took a bite. "This is really good, Steve."

"Thank you, but you know what I mean, Nat. He enjoyed spending time with you."

"What do you want me to say?" Natasha asked in a soft voice while avoiding eye contact with Steve. She wasn't really sure where Steve wanted this conversation to go.

"I just thought you should know that it's not just me who accepts your Little side." Steve said. Ah, that's where Steve's going.

"Well you're my heartmate, and Clint for some reason still chooses me to be his best friend so really, I don't think it's a pretty solid argument." Nat said. As the words left Natasha's mouth, she regretted it. She chanced a look at Steve but luckily he didn't seem offended.

"What if I told you it extends beyond me and Clint? The team's been asking about you, you know." Steve said gently, and that caught Natasha's attention. "They keep asking me when they can see you, but I tell them we'll have to wait until you're ready."

"Why do they... Why would they ask? It's, I mean, it's not like we ever ask before dropping by someone's place." She said with her eyebrows furrowed together.

"Yes, but they also know that a lot's changing in your life right now. They probably don't want to intrude especially if you're not ready to see anyone yet." Steve explained. "I just thought of bringing this up because maybe seeing them would do some good. I know it's a pretty difficult adjustment period for you Nat, and I think having people who love you around will help."

"You're not sure if they love me." Nat said in an incredibly soft voice, but Steve heard her clearly. Even though she spent only five minutes cleaning up earlier, that was plenty of time for someone to spiral down a hole filled with doubts and insecurities; especially given Nat's overly emotional state brought by her drops.

"What makes you think that?"

"Nevermind, forget I said anything." Nat said before stuffing her mouth with steak so she wouldn't have to talk. Yes, it was a pretty childish gesture but that was the best Nat could think of right now.

"I'm not doing that." Steve said with a shake of his head. He put down his utensils first as he looked at Natasha, giving her his full attention. "What's going on in your mind?"

"Nothing, it's stupid." Natasha mumbled after swallowing her food.

"It's not stupid if it's bothering you." Steve said. "You can tell me anything, Nat."

"I'm just worried." Natasha admitted before she could stop herself. "About what the others might think. I know you said that you accept me and all, and that Clint does too, but like I said: That's different. It's like the two of you are obliged to like me, but it's not like that with the others. They don't have to accept me or like me, at most they just have to be professional with me--and I, Steve..."

"It's okay, go on baby. I'm listening." Steve said in a gentle voice.

"Before, before we became heartmates, the team's the only family I had. The first and only family I had, and I don't want to do anything to screw it up. What if they don't like having a toddler around? I don't know, I just think I'd rather face the uncertainty of where I stand with them, rather than the possibility of them rejecting me."

"Nat for what it's worth, I think the chances of them rejecting you are slimmer than that of Fury ever telling us what exactly happened to his other eye--"

"He told me about that." Nat interrupted, and she had to fight back a laugh because of the face Steve made. It was a pretty interesting story and Nat didn't blame Fury for not wanting to disclose the specifics to just anyone. How she pulled the truth out of Fury though? Well that's a story for another day.

"He told you..? Okay that's besides the point, and you know that." Steve said. "My point is, having a toddler Little in the family isn't the worst thing that could happen to us: It's far from being the worst. Nat they love you for you, and sure it'll take some adjusting for everyone because it is a big change, but give it some time and give them a chance--give _yourself_ a chance, and you'll see."

"I don't know..."

"We can start small. It doesn't have to be all of them all at once. Did you like spending time with Clint today?" Steve asked in a gentle voice. When Natasha nodded her head, he continued. "Okay, how about we invite one of them over tomorrow? We can ease you back into everything so it's not overwhelming for you."

"I guess that's okay." Natasha said. She'd long put down her utensils too and she cast her eyes down to avoid eye contact with Steve. Her stomach currently wasn't feeling the best, but it was most likely because of the nerves and not the food.

"Okay, that's good then." Steve smiled. "Who do you want us to invite?"

For her part, Natasha was hoping she could learn how to control her drops before she saw any of their other teammates. This didn't seem very likely now though. Steve just seemed so hopeful and optimistic about everything and she didn't want to let him down. Maybe part of her was also hoping that Steve had a point; that this could all work out in her favor in the end.

She looked up at Steve and thought for a moment, but she really couldn't think of who she would want to spend time with as Tasha next. She sighed in frustration and shrugged. "I don't know."

Steve anticipated that answer, so he already had a suggestion in mind. "Alright, well how about Tony?" Natasha visibly tensed at that. If there was one person she was looking forward to meeting as Tasha the least, it was Tony.

Don't get her wrong, Tony's a great Big. Sure at first he was the scary Big that no Littles really wanted to go near, but he rebranded himself after he bonded with Clint. Now he was one of those cool uncles that Littles loved and Bigs hoped they could keep under control. So Natasha's hesitations weren't brought by Tony's nature as a Big, but by her own insecurities. Maybe she would be fine if they went with Sam, or Wanda, heck she'd even take Fitz-Simmons. She can voice that easily: No problem, right?

"Um, yeah, okaysurethat'sfine." Real smooth, Natasha.

"I'm not going to skirt around this anymore," Steve shook his head, "what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. I said I'm okay with Tony." Natasha insisted. Based on the way she was behaving, you wouldn't think she's one of SHIELD's top secret agents.

"I know you said that, but your body language and tone are telling me otherwise." Steve said gently. "We don't have to start with Tony if you're not comfortable. I just thought it would be a good idea to go with a Big this time since we already had a Little over."

"I said it's fine, Steve." Nat was starting to get a little agitated and she was scratching at the table cloth.

"Do you not want Tony to see you dropped?" Steve asked. If he's going to help Natasha, he needed to know what the problem is.

"Yes--but it's not that exactly." Natasha mumbled before closing her eyes and shaking her head to herself. Why was she suddenly opening up? She blames her Little hormones for this.

"Then what is it?" Steve asked. "Baby I can't help if I don't know what's wrong."

"It's just... What if he doesn't like me? I know this sounds so stupid but Steve I'm scared." Natasha admitted. She's been having a lot of weird emotions lately, and this was one that surfaced most recently.

Steve meanwhile was more perplexed. "Why are you scared about Tony not liking you?" Steve asked as gently as he could. Gathering from their earlier conversation, it sounded like Natasha was nervous about the entire team not liking her: Why were they zeroing in on Tony now? Maybe it just amplified more now that they had an action plan for it?

"I know how important he is to you," Natasha opened her eyes to finally look at Steve, "and I'm just... I don't know. Your relationship with Tony's obviously been around longer than ours has. What if Tony doesn't like having me around?" Natasha didn't voice her exact concern, but Steve had enough to gather what she actually meant. Granted, this relationship between Tony and Steve wasn't anything official yet, but still.

"Nat I doubt that Tony won't like you--"

"But what if?" Natasha interrupted. "I know you're with me now, but I'm scared that this is just some honeymoon phase." It wasn't for Natasha, or so she hoped it wasn't: But what was this to Steve? She could feel herself tearing up from frustration because she just wanted to get a grip on her emotions. One minute she was resenting her Little side, and then the next she jumps to wanting Steve by her side, and then to hoping that the others would accept her, and then back to resenting herself. Talk about parkour.

"What about after? What happens after this break that we're going to have?" Natasha asked as she reached up to hastily wipe the tears away. "What if Tony won't like having me around?"

"Nat..." Steve paused for a moment to really think about his next words. He was glad that Natasha was opening up to him, but it also upset him to think that Natasha's having such terrible thoughts. After a few more moments of quiet with the occasional sniffle from Natasha, Steve stood up and walked to Nat's side of the table. He sat down on the chair next to her and faced his Little before reaching out and turning her chair so she'd be facing him too.

"Nat, baby can you look at me?" Steve asked in a gentle voice. Natasha was currently staring at her lap, but after a few seconds she hesitantly looked up at Steve and his heart almost broke. Sitting closer to Nat now, he could see clearly how upset and worried she really was.

"I understand where you're coming from, but I promise you this isn't just a honeymoon phase for me." Steve said in the most reassuring voice he could muster. "Sure eventually we won't be together 24/7, but I will always, always come back to you. You're who I come home to now and I wouldn't have it any other way."

"You mean it?" Natasha asked in an incredibly soft and hesitant voice.

"I mean every single word." Steve said with a reassuring smile. "And on your worries about Tony, I really do think he'll like you. On the off chance that he won't... Well, you'll just have to believe me when I say that I'll put you first." He said with utmost sincerity.

"So, you'll just leave Tony?" Natasha asked with a frown. That wasn't what she was expecting at all.

"I hope it won't come to that, but if our being around him will cause you any discomfort of the sort then yes." Steve said. He _really_ hoped it wouldn't come to that because he was growing to like Tony's company more and more. Well, he was growing to like Tony himself more and more.   
"We're heartmates, Nat. On the slimmest chance that Tony wouldn't want you around, then pursuing that 'what if' isn't worth it for me. No matter what happens, you'll always have me, okay?"

Natasha may not fully comprehend the weight of the heartmate bond yet, but it really is the strongest relationship two people could have: Yes, even stronger than that between soulmates. So Steve wasn't just giving Nat empty promises right now, he truly did mean every word he said.

"Okay. Yeah, we can, we can invite Tony over." Natasha said before looking down at her lap and nervously fiddling with the hem of her shirt. Was she right to confide in Steve, or did this just possibly guilt Steve into saying all that to make her feel better? Maybe she was just overthinking everything at this point.

"Alright, I'll ask him to come over in the afternoon." Steve said with a small smile. "Can I get a hug?" He asked before opening his arms up for Natasha to come into. This time, Natasha didn't think twice before nodding her head and leaning forward to hug Steve, and Steve hugged her just as, if not tighter.

"I'm sorry I keep getting so worked up." Nat said softly. She turned her head so she'd be facing the side as she rested her head on Steve's chest, right where his heart was.

"Don't worry about it. What you're feeling is valid, okay?" Steve said as he started to rub Natasha's back. "I'd much prefer you talking to me about your feelings than you keeping it all bottled up."

"And you'll talk to me too if you have problems?" Natasha asked shyly before turning her head up to look at Steve. Again, she didn't want Steve to pull all the weight in their relationship. Plus, Natasha wanted to make sure that Steve was happy too.

"Yes, I'll talk to you if I have problems." Steve smiled and kissed Natasha's forehead. Though part of him was thinking maybe not all problems. There were some things that he didn't need to bother his Little with.

From then on, Steve and Natasha had a better dinner. Instead of going back to his seat, Steve pulled over his plate so he can sit next to Natasha which made the latter quite happy. They talked about the most random things like shows Steve should watch during his free time, or some office gossip they managed to pick up the last couple of days. The point is, for the remainder of their dinner Natasha almost forgot about everything that's been changing lately; and it felt great. It was a comfort to know that even with her entire world changing around her, some things like her friendship with Steve (and okay, Clint) stay the same.

The rest of the evening was pretty uneventful, with Natasha calling it a night after helping Steve do the dishes. After the day they had, Natasha needed some time to herself just to think, and Steve was more than willing to give her some space (after making sure that Natasha understood she can always come to him for anything).

Before going to their own rooms, the two of them made plans to have Natasha's documents and Little ID processed in the morning so yes, they'd have to work together to make sure she'll drop for that. Having said that, Natasha got a bit anxious when she woke up as Nat and not Tasha. Unsurprisingly, Steve was quick to pick up on her nerves as they made breakfast together, and he was even quicker to assure her that it was fine.

"It hasn't even been a week since your first drop. No one expects you to be able to control them so soon." Steve said soothingly as he finished up their omelettes.

"I know, it's just frustrating." Natasha said with a sigh before placing the cooked sausages on a serving plate. "Why do I even have to be dropped for this?" She was trying her best to be more open-minded about everything, but she was having a hard time preparing herself to be dropped in front of other SHIELD personnel.

"It's just protocol, baby. All Littles have to go through it, and it shouldn't be too bad." Steve said.

" _Shouldn't be too bad_ " Natasha repeated, "how comforting, Steve." She said, and there was a teasing tone in her voice so that at least told Steve that she was feeling okay enough to joke around.

"I'm sorry, I haven't really seen the process myself." Steve chuckled. "But from what I gathered it's pretty standard. They just need you dropped because they have some sort of machine to verify your Little age."

"Alright." Natasha sighed. There really wasn't anything she could say or do about it anyway. "I still can't believe that Clint's coming over... To fix my hair." She said with an amused shake of her head as she brought the sausages to the table.

"Yeah well he did have plenty of practice. He had only Wanda as a little sister for a while before Daisy and Lincoln came along." Steve reminded Natasha. He and Nat called Clint yesterday to ask if he pass by to fix Tasha's hair for the ID picture. Steve promised himself he'd learn to do hair soon, but even he was realistic enough not to think he could learn to do a proper braid in a few hours.

Clint was more than happy to agree, and that was why towards the end of their breakfast FRIDAY announced his arrival. "Let him in, FRI." Steve said from where he was sitting next to Natasha.

"Good morning!" Clint greeted them a few moments later as he entered their dining room, and both Steve and Natasha greeted him back.

"Have you eaten already, Clint?" Steve asked as Clint took a seat across from Natasha. "You can grab a bite if you want, there's plenty of food."

"Nah it's okay, I already ate before coming down." Clint shook his head. "Just here to do my baby sister's hair." He said with a wink, earning a playful glare from Natasha.

"Thanks for agreeing to help... Again." Steve said with a grateful smile. "Well if you're done Nat, you can go with Clint while I clean up here." Steve said upon seeing that both their plates were empty.

"What?" Nat frowned slightly. "Oh, no it's okay. I can help you clean up." Natasha insisted.

"It's fine baby, I've got it covered." Steve said with a reassuring smile before gathering their plates and standing up. Natasha didn't move to leave the room with Clint though, in fact she was just watching Steve gather the plates, and even followed him with her eyes as he went back to the kitchen.

"Um, I think I'll go and see if Steve needs my help." Natasha told Clint.

It wasn't difficult for Clint to pick up on what was going on. He's a Little too, after all. Evidently, his best friend needed her Big right now. "Yeah sure, I'll just be waiting here." Clint said with a smile. That was more than enough to get Natasha to stand and walk to the kitchen.

"Hey Steve," Natasha said as she entered the kitchen, "anything I can help with?"

Steve was already doing the dishes by then, but he turned when he heard Natasha. "Nat it's okay, I got it." He said reassuringly. "But if you want to stay here first, that's also okay." He added, figuring this was about more than just helping with the dishes.

It was rather embarrassing for Natasha to be called out like that and she was surprised that Steve so easily picked that up: But right now she didn't really care. She just nodded her head and walked over to stand next to Steve as he finished washing the dishes. At some point, Natasha started leaning against Steve just to have contact with him.

Once Steve was done with the dishes, he dried his hands and turned to Natasha. "Alright, come here." He said softly before reaching for Nat and picking her up. Nat didn't fight it, but it did make her blush a bright red.

"Steve, I'm not dropped..." Nat found the need to remind Steve, but she did wrap her arms around him as he held her on his hip.

"I know, but I can also sense that you're feeling a little nervous and need a little comfort, and that's okay." Steve said in his soothing voice. "Are you nervous about the registration?"

"Maybe." Nat admitted with a frown. It was the first time anyone in SHIELD (besides Steve, Clint, and Bruce) was going to see her dropped.

"It's okay to be nervous, but I promise it's going to be okay." Steve said as he started to sway with Natasha. Hopefully, this'd help the Little drop as well. After a little while, Natasha relaxed enough so that she was resting against Steve and had her head on his shoulder. The swaying combined with the comfort of her Big was enough to ease her nerves.

"Is she dropped?" It had been a while since Natasha left to "help" Steve, so Clint thought of checking in on them in case they needed help with anything.

"Almost." Steve said softly as he continued to sway with Natasha. Upon hearing Clint's voice, Natasha turned her head on Steve's shoulder so she could see her brother and wave to him. That got Clint to smile and wave back.

"Hi bubby." Tasha said in a small, shy voice. Being around Steve and the comfort he provided did Natasha well and helped her drop.

"Hi Tasha." Clint greeted her back and approached the pair. "Are you ready for me to make your hair all pretty?"

"P'etty haiw?" Tasha questioned and sat up in Steve's arms, looking t Clint curiously.

"Yeah baby, bubby's here to help make your hair pretty." Steve informed Tasha before kissing the side of her head. "How about you go with bubby, hm?" They waited for Tasha to nod her head in agreement before Steve carefully transferred Tasha into Clint's waiting arms.

"Let's go and make your hair aaaall pretty for your ID picture later." Clint told Tasha with a smile before turning to Steve, who then led the way to what would be Tasha's nursery. It still looked like the old guest room right now, but that'll change soon. Before they leave for vacation, this room would be any toddler Little's dream nursery, or so Steve hoped.

"Alright, bubby needs you to sit down here first, okay Tasha?" Clint said. He pulled out the stool from the dresser and moved to sit Tasha down on it. Luckily, the toddler seemed to be in a good mood so Tasha allowed him to sit her down without any fuss.

"Daddy?"

"I'm right here baby." Steve said reassuringly. He walked closer to them and crouched down in front of Tasha so she can see him. "Can you show daddy your big smile for later?" He asked, and Tasha happily obliged. She looked at her daddy and gave him the biggest smile she could muster, and Steve couldn't help but smile back.

"That's a very pretty smile." Steve said as Clint started to work on Tasha's hair, separating it into two equal parts so he can do pigtails in French braids.

"Tasha happy, daddy." Tasha told Steve

"Tasha's happy? That's why she has such a beautiful smile?" Steve smiled.

"Uhhuh, Tasha happy wif daddy an' bubby." She confirmed.

"Well that makes daddy very happy, and I'm sure it makes bubby happy too." Steve said.

"Mhm, bubby's very happy that Tasha's happy." Clint said. He was being very careful not to tug Tasha's hair. Granted, he already had quite some practice being gentle while doing hair since Daisy and Wanda were pretty whiney about it, but it still felt different now. Extra caution has to be taken because this is their baby sister, after all.

Clint just finished tying off one braid when Tasha suddenly looked down at her own lap. From where he was standing, Clint couldn't really see what was going on but judging by the concerned expression on Steve's face it probably wasn't good.

It wasn't anything big or really anything they had to get worked up about. Tasha simply had an accident, and the toddler didn't even seem to be upset about it. What really bothered Steve was that this could have been avoided if he thought about putting Tasha in a diaper sooner.   
"Oh it's okay baby, daddy will get you cleaned up." Steve said soothingly, though it really felt like he was soothing himself more than anyone. Of course being a 2 year old, Tasha wouldn't think much of the accident. "Just tell daddy when you're all done."

"Otay daddy." Tasha said softly as she continued to wet herself, not at all phased by what was going on. For his part, Clint stopped at one braid first considering that more urgent matters had to be taken care of. "All done." She said after a few moments, and Steve nodded his head before standing and lifting Tasha up. Luckily, he was strong enough to hold Tasha up from under her shoulders, holding her almost at arm's length as he brought her to the en suite bathroom.

Looking around, Steve didn't know what to do so he just went with his gut and put Tasha down near the tub. The bathroom wasn't equipped for toddlers yet, so Steve would have to make do. He stripped Tasha down and balled up her wet clothes before lifting the toddler into the tub for a quick rinse.

"Baf time daddy?" Tasha asked as Steve helped her sit down.

"No baby, daddy just needs to clean you up, okay?" Steve explained as he grabbed the shower head. He turned on the water and made sure the temperature was just right before rinsing Tasha. Steve already messed up when he forgot to put Tasha in a diaper earlier, he didn't want accidentally burning or freezing his Little to his list of mess ups for the day.

"Daddy sad." Tasha pointed out. Her head was tilted slightly to the left in confusion as she looked up at Steve. Huh, even when dropped Tasha seems to be intuitive of other people's emotions.

"Daddy's not sad." Steve reassured her in a gentle tone. "Daddy's just thinking."

"Wha' fink?" Tasha asked before sticking her fingers in her mouth.

"Just boring Big stuff. Nothing baby Tasha should be worried about." Steve said. He smiled at his Little to reassure her that he was fine and leaned in to give her a little kiss on the nose.

"Otay, Tasha kissies." Tasha smiled and made grabby hands for Steve. Now Steve couldn't really say no to that (and he wouldn't want to, anyway), so he leaned closer again and Tasha gave him an innocent kiss on the lips.

"Wow my baby gives the best kissies in the world!" Steve said with proper enthusiasm, but he also had a genuine smile on his face. Hearing that seemed to make Tasha happy, so Steve was happy. For the remainder of the quick rinse, Steve tried not to dwell on his mistakes anymore and in no time, Tasha was a squeaky clean toddler. Her special towels were still in the wash, so they had to settle with the regular guest towels for now. Luckily Tasha didn't seem to mind, especially since Steve picked the fluffiest one to wrap her in.

"Oh Clint you didn't have to." When they got back to the bedroom, Steve saw that Clint was just about done cleaning up Tasha's accident.

"I know, I just wanted to help." Clint said with a shrug. "I'm already here anyway, might as well make myself useful." He chuckled.

"Thanks, Clint. Really, you've done so much I can't even begin to think how much I owe you--"

"Okay stop right there," Clint cut Steve off as the latter was laying Tasha down in the middle of the bed, "you put up with my shit when I'm dropped, and you always take care of us when we need you. Steve, this is the least I could do. You don't owe me anything, okay?"

"At least let me thank you." Steve said with a sheepish smile as he opened up Tasha's towel and started to dry her off.

"Shit!" Tasha said with a big smile. She heard the new word from her bubby and it sounded fun!

"Still want to thank me?" Clint asked. To his credit, Clint actually looked ashamed as he stood there, scratching the back of his head. Yeah he should be more careful with his words now.

Instead of stressing like he wanted about his toddler using a curse word, Steve took a deep breath and tried to approach this calmly. "Baby, that's not a very nice word. We don't say that again, okay?" He told Tasha as gently as he could.

"Shit bad?" Tasha asked with a frown, and Steve actually winced when she said it again.

"Mhm, that's a bad word." Steve confirmed. He'd opened up a diaper already and just lifted Tasha's legs to slide the diaper underneath her little bum. "Good baby girls like Tasha aren't supposed to say that."

"Bubby say bad." Tasha pointed out.

"Well bubby made a mistake, and he promises he won't say it again."

"Daddy's right, Tasha. It's a bad word and we shouldn't say it." Clint offered up, and Tasha turned her head to look at her brother.

"Otay. Tasha an' bubby no bad." Tasha said with a nod of her head.

Once the diaper was taped around her waist, Tasha rolled away from Steve and tried to crawl off the bed. Steve was quick on his feet though and caught the Little before she could go off. Before bringing Tasha back to Clint, Steve got her dressed into her outfit for the day: A simple white cotton long sleeve and a pink jumper skirt, but it wasn't any ordinary jumper skirt. The straps were shaped into bunny ears and there was a little heart in the middle of the skirt so it looked like a bunny's nose.

"Now that's adorable." Clint commented as Steve brought Tasha back over to him. "She looks like a proper toddler now."

Steve couldn't help but smile at that comment. Usually he's the one complimenting other people's Littles, so the feeling of being on the receiving end of this compliment was foreign. It was a welcome kind of foreign though. "She'll look even more adorable thanks to you." He said as he sat Tasha back down on the stool.

"You give me too much credit." Clint chuckled. "But I'll do my best for this little girl. She's going to be the prettiest toddler Little around."

"She's the _only_ toddler Little around." Steve reminded Clint.

"Around SHIELD, maybe. I was talking about the whole world. Big picture thinking, old man." Clint said as he resumed braiding Tasha's hair.

"Tasha p'etty?" Tasha asked, and Steve crouched down in front of her so she can see him better.

"Mhm, Tasha's very pretty." Steve told Tasha with a genuine smile.

Natasha's beautiful, there's no denying that. Nat however wasn't really great with compliments. Whenever someone called her beautiful, or even just complimented her smile, she rarely knew how to accept it. Sure on missions she'd flirt with whoever necessary, accept the occasional compliment here and there but that's different. Honestly Steve wished Nat would see that for herself: That they're not just complimenting her because she's family.

More often than not, when you look at Natasha she may seem like the most confident woman in the room. Those who're closer to her though know that isn't the case. That's partly why Steve's always tried to be more caring towards Nat from the very beginning. Now that they're heartmates, Steve'll make sure he takes every opportunity to remind Natasha (not just Tasha!!) that she's one very special snowflake.

"Daddy p'etty too." Tasha said, making Steve chuckle softly.

"Thank you baby, that's very sweet of you." Steve smiled. "Do you like your clothes?" He wanted to keep conversation with his Little, also to distract her enough so that Clint can finish her hair in peace.

"Uhhuh! It bunny daddy! Look!" Tasha said with a big smile as she pulled on her straps.

"Wow you're right! And is that your favorite color?"

"Fav'wit?" Tasha asked curiously. She didn't really know what her daddy meant.

"Oh, it means the one you like best." Steve tried to explain.

"Uh-uh. Daddy fav'wit." Tasha said, and Steve smiled even more if that was possible. Okay, Tasha didn't quite grasp Steve's question but come on: Was he really going to call her out on that after this?

"Tasha is daddy's favorite too." Steve said, earning a big smile from Tasha too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello~ Aaaa I'm alive. I know it's been a while!! Huhu. Anyway  
> How do you guys think Nat/Tasha will take to Tony? c:


	13. Chapter 13

Everything went smoothly after Tasha got dressed and had her hair done. Clint just had to keep Tasha entertained while Steve got ready too, but that didn't take long. In a matter of minutes, Steve was ready as well. After seeing Clint off, Steve slipped some mary janes onto Tasha's feet and then they were out of the apartment.

Other than the diaper bag on Steve's back, Tasha had Nini tucked in her arms because the toddler absolutely refused to leave the apartment without her. Steve didn't mind though: It was as if Nini completed Tasha's outfit. Seeing Tasha in her outfit complete with knee high socks just made Steve want to squish the living daylights out of his Little. As if that wasn't enough, Steve clipped on a pacifier to Tasha's outfit and now she was sucking happily on it as Steve held her.

As they rode the elevator down to the ground floor, a couple of agents came and went. Every time, Steve would protectively tighten his hold on Tasha, but the toddler didn't seem fazed at all by the presence of their colleagues. Sometimes if the person was a really familiar face, Tasha would even smile behind her soother and wave at them. That got a lot of agents cooing, and it brought a smile to Steve's face seeing how accepting they were of Nat being a toddler Little. Hopefully, Nat wouldn't look back at this as an embarrassing experience once she ages up.

"Bye bye Tasha. You be good for your daddy, okay?" Agent Carter all but cooed to Tasha once the elevator reached her floor.

"Bye bye!" Tasha exclaimed, causing the soother to drop from her lips. "Tasha be good."

"I know you will be." Sharon smiled at Tasha before turning to Steve. "She's an adorable one, Steve. I'll see you two around." She told him, and Steve thanked her and said goodbye too as she stepped out of the elevator.

On the way to the next building, Steve encountered a few more familiar faces but he was much more relaxed about it this time. Tasha seemed to enjoy the extra attention: Steve would even go far as to say that she's practically basking in it. Tasha and Nat sure had a lot of big differences.

It took longer than Steve anticipated, but they eventually got to SHIELD's Little bureau. Despite being early, the bureau was already packed. All new Little agents had to go through registration here, and SHIELD just recently took in a new batch from the academy.

"Maybe we should have come earlier." Steve mumbled as he adjusted Tasha on his hip.

"Many peoples daddy." Tasha pointed out, but she didn't seem bothered and Steve was glad about that.

"Yeah baby, some of these people are probably going to be your friends some day." Steve told her.

Looking around the room, Steve gathered that most of the new Littles were probably around 5-7 year olds. There were a few on the older side of the spectrum, but none seemed to be as young as Tasha. You'd think a waiting room filled with tons of Littles would be chaotic, but surprisingly this one wasn't.

Steve was one of the very few Bigs in the room, since most new agents don't have heartmates at SHIELD yet, or at the very least designated caretakers. There were however employees from the bureau who were keeping the Littles entertained while they waited for their turn.

In one corner, an employee sat on a stool as he held a giant picture book facing a small group of Littles on the floor. It looked like a book about a colorful panda, and the Littles seemed to be pretty engaged. There was also a small arts and crafts table where Littles were doing a variety of things from coloring, to origami, and some were playing with clay. A lot of play areas were also set up around the room and all of them were occupied by groups of Littles who looked like they didn't mind the wait. Some of them even seemed to be good friends already.

The waiting area really was designed with Littles in mind. You could tell not just by all the activities, but by the way the room was decorated too. The walls were painted in colorful hues and they weren't plain either. There were a lot of fun designs going on such that no spot resembled another. There could be dinosaurs on one portion, but turn your head just a little to the right and suddenly you're in space. Stars, planets, and even rainbows hung from the ceiling--but not low enough for the Littles to be able to reach!

"Captain Rogers." Someone called out Steve's name, and so Steve turned to face the general direction and saw that it was one of the bureau employees. It was a woman who looked to be in her late 20s. A woman with a kind expression and soothing aura about her: A common trait among Little bureau employees. She was probably only a few inches taller than Natasha, but you could easily tell she's a Big.

"We were told to expect you this morning. My name's Allison, and I'll be facilitating Natasha's registration."

"Hi, yes it's nice to meet you." Steve greeted. He extended his hand that wasn't supporting Tasha out, and Allison smiled and shook it. "Agent Coulson told you we were coming?"

"No, it was actually Mr. Stark." Allison said. To say that Steve was surprised would be an understatement. Why would Tony have given the bureau a heads up? "I think he knew today would be a busy day, and so I'm here to help streamline the process for you." She explained kindly.

"Oh wow, well that's great then." Steve said. "What should I do first? I'm sorry, not really that familiar with the process."

"It's not a problem." Allison assured before turning and gesturing for Steve to follow her, which he did with Tasha in his arms. "We'll be needing you to fill up some forms first. It should be quick and easy."

As they walked to the next room, Tasha was looking around. Her eyes were wide and inquisitive as she took everything in and Steve couldn't help but smile. Even dropped Nat's still as curious as ever. Well that, and the Little was probably enthralled by all the colorful decorations.

The next room wasn't as vibrant or playful, as it was clearly designed more for functionality. It was furnished like one of SHIELD's meeting rooms--complete with the play area in one corner for dropped Littles. Tasha didn't seem to want to leave Steve though, so Steve let her be and sat down on one of the chairs, Tasha on his lap.

"She can play with the toys if she likes, Captain." Allison said as she sat on the seat across from them.

"It's fine, she's okay here." Steve said. True enough Tasha looked pretty content in her Big's arms, so Allison didn't push further. Instead, she pulled out a tablet and started to show Steve the forms he'd need to fill up for Natasha. There were quite a lot.

As he answered the forms, he vaguely wondered how all those Littles in the waiting room would manage to fill these up themselves. Then again, they probably had a better grasp on their Little side and could drop and age easily, unlike Natasha. Technically Bigs didn't have to come with their Littles, but Nat was a special case. That, and Steve wanted to be there for her.

"Hey, um, I have a question." Steve was on the second form by then and he had his eyebrows furrowed together as he looked at the tablet. Tasha was also starting to lose her patience and was becoming quite the squirmy toddler.

"What is it, captain?" Allison asked.

"There's an item here asking for the primary heartmate's name, but there's also an item asking for a legal caretaker. Those are two different things?" Steve clarified and looked up at Allison.

"Oh, yes. That item's added particularly for SHIELD." Allison said. If Steve didn't know any better, he'd say she looked somewhat uncomfortable. "We've added legal caretaker to the form after we had several incidents of Littles losing their heartmates in the field. It's only a precautionary measure, captain. If anything it's for formality's sake."

Steve could tell that Allison was trying to be reassuring, but it wasn't working. Yes, he knew their profession's incredibly dangerous. The risks related to his heartmate relationship didn't hit him though until now. He looked down at Tasha in his arms and couldn't help but feel a surge of protectiveness. He wasn't going to let anything bad happen to Natasha, and he wasn't going to let anything bad come his way either. Leaving Natasha alone is never going to be an option.

"If it's all the same, I don't think I want to fill it out."

"Captain, it's mandatory." Allison frowned. "We can't process Natasha's documents if any forms are incomplete. It's for Natasha's sake."

"Well I haven't really thought of a legal caretaker for her." Steve said a bit defensively. The thought of anything happening to either of them really just struck him. Much to Allison's credit though, she stayed calm.

"Does she have a second heartmate? Primaries usually enlist secondaries or tertiaries as the caretaker."

"No, it's just me." Or so Steve thought? Shit. He actually didn't know if Natasha has another heartmate. Steve knew for a fact that he only had Natasha where SHIELD agents are concerned... But Nat?

Nat hasn't interacted much with others as Tasha yet. What if Steve wasn't her only heartmate? Yes, having more than one, more so two heartmates was unusual... But not impossible. That possibility should excite Steve because that'd mean even more people would shower Natasha in love, but it scared him more than anything. What if Nat would like her other heartmate more?

"Well, does she have another person she trusts?" Allison asked, pulling Steve out of his thoughts. He was getting ahead of himself, so he tried to shake his fears away. They were needless, and not to mention selfish.

"I guess I can say Clint. Er, agent Barton." Steve said, his hold on Natasha unconsciously tightening.

"Agent Barton..." Allison scrolled through the files on her own tablet, and stopped when she came across Clint's file. "Ah, he's also a Little. The caretaker needs to be... Well, a caretaker, captain."

"Honestly beyond me and Clint, I don't know who she actually trusts." It's the hard truth. Yes, Nat sees the team as her family but really looking at it, Steve wasn't sure about Nat's disposition towards everyone. If they're talking about trust--especially when it came to her Little side, it really was just him and Clint.

"Okay, then let's try to make it a little less complicated." Allison said calmly. It was as if she could read Steve's mind. "Who would you trust to take care of her? It doesn't have to be someone in SHIELD." As if that broadened his choices.

Steve sighed and closed his eyes for a moment as he really thought this through. He couldn't leave Natasha with just about anyone. It had to be someone he can trust to keep her safe, who genuinely cares about Natasha from the very beginning. It can't be someone who'd just magically care about her because they became her legal caretaker.

"Daddy s'eepy?"

Steve opened his eyes and looked down at Tasha, and he smiled when he saw how adorably curious she looked. "No baby, daddy's just thinking."

"Wa' f'inkin?" Tasha asked, her head tilting slightly to the right in her confusion.

"Just who else can take care of you." Steve said.

"Daddy take care of baby." Tasha pointed out, and Steve couldn't help but smile.

"I know baby, daddy will always take care of you." Steve said in a soothing voice before leaning down and giving Tasha a kiss on the forehead. He just had to prepare if, gods forbid, the day came when he couldn't take care of Tasha. He had two people in mind for the guardianship.

On one hand, he had Sam. Sam and Nat were already comfortable with one another, all things considered. If Steve really looked at it, he could probably say Sam would be in Nat's top three Bigs. Next to Clint, Sam's probably the one who really knows how to handle Natasha: Among other things, he doesn't get scared when she's in her ol' threatening Black Widow mood. He also doesn't get pissed when Nat's being stubborn--in fact, there were a handful of times when Sam was able to talk some sense into her. And when Nat's in one of her down moods, Sam knows how to help in his own small ways too.

On the other hand, there's Tony. He and Nat had gone through a lot together, but you can't really call them best friends. But then, if Steve and Tony really hit it off, he thinks he'd want Tony to take care of Nat. Then Steve realized how selfish that sounded: Was he just considering Tony because of his own feelings? How would Nat react if she found out he enlisted Tony as her legal caretaker?

At surface level, it also seemed like Sam's the one who'd be more open to taking in another Little under his wing. He's absolutely great with Wanda, so that counts as something right? But Tony's great with Clint too... Now that he's thinking about it, Tony did mention before about actually loving the Heartmate life _. That_ , on top of the fact that Littles actually love him when they're dropped. That has to count for something, right?

"Captain?" Allison spoke. "I can practically hear the gears turning in your head." She said with a sympathetic smile.

"Yeah, I'm sorry. This is a lot harder than I thought it would be." Steve sighed.

"Just trust your gut, cap." Allison said, and Steve nodded his head.

He stared at that item on the form as he thought hard about it for a few more moments. Eventually, he reached out and typed away, trying his best not to think too much about it. This is just a precaution anyway, right? After that item, Steve found the rest of the questions to be a breeze. About ten minutes later, he had everything filled up and handed the tablet back to Allison.

"Thank you captain." Allison smiled. "These should be processed in time for her ID to be printed at the end of this."

"Alright, sounds great. What's next?" Steve asked

"Well, we need to determine her Little age. I know Dr. Banner has already run some tests for you, but we still like to run our own here for formality." Allison explained. "It'll only take five minutes, but we'll have to leave her alone in the next room."

Steve already didn't like the sound of that. "Why do I have to leave her?"

"It's only for five minutes, and we'll be able to see her the whole time." Allison assured. "All she has to do is to sit and wait, and wear this." She said as she procured a little headband looking device from her bag.

"What if she freaks out? Or if she cries or gets upset?"

"I know this isn't what you want to hear, but it's all part of the process." Allison said apologetically. "You'll be able to get to her as soon as the five minutes are up."

"I don't understand the point of all this." Steve muttered and took a deep sigh. "Alright. But I'm not making any promises that I won't barge in the moment she cries."

"She'll be okay. Majority of the Littles aren't even upset by the test." Allison said as she stood to lead the way.

"But Tasha's also your first toddler Little. You don't know how toddlers would react to the test." Steve pointed out as he stood with Tasha in his arms.

"I have a feeling she won't mind. I think she'll even come to like it in the end." Allison said with a small smile.

It wasn't clear to Steve how that would happen, but he didn't argue any further. The next room they entered at least looked more Little-friendly this time. It was similar to how the waiting room looked, except a lot smaller. There weren't any play corners or art tables though, but at least it was nicely decorated.

"Can you sit her down please?" Allison requested as she pulled out the chair.

"Um, is there maybe somewhere else we can sit her down?" Steve asked. "If I'm leaving her alone, I don't think I want her to just sit on a chair." He said as he held Tasha protectively. Steve found that Tasha was the complete opposite of Natasha when it came to coordination: Baby Tasha was an absolutely clumsy toddler. He didn't want to risk Tasha falling off the chair.

Luckily, Allison seemed to understand where he was coming from. Instead of questioning Steve, she nodded and called someone through her earpiece to help. About a minute later, an employee came in with a high chair in tow.

"Daddy's going to set you down first, okay baby?" Steve said once the high chair was all set up.

"Daddy leave?" Tasha asked with a frown, and it took all of Steve's willpower to sit Tasha down in the chair.

"Daddy just needs to get something, okay? But I'll be back, I promise." Steve said soothingly as he buckled Tasha in. "Miss Allison is going to talk to you now, okay? I'll be back baby."

Tasha looked absolutely miserable, but she nodded her head. Once Tasha was settled in her high chair, Steve bent down and kissed the top of her head before giving her a little tickle, just to get her to smile. He didn't want to prolong this any more so once Tasha seemed fine, he said goodbye and returned to the last room.

True enough, the TV in the room was already turned on and playing a live feed of Tasha.

"Hi baby Tasha." Allison smiled and approached the Little.

"Hi lady." Tasha said in a soft, shy voice before sticking her fingers in her mouth... Even though her soother was just there, hanging from her clothes.

Allison chuckled and shook her head in amusement. "Do you know what this is, sweetheart?" Allison was holding up the headband she showed Steve earlier. Now that he can see it more clearly, Steve noticed that it actually had some fun patterns on it. It was a cream color with some flowers, rainbows, and seemed quite glittery too.

In response to Allison's question, Little Tasha shook her head.

"Well, this is a special crown you get to wear while you wait for your daddy to get back." Allison explained. At the mention of a crown, Tasha's eyes lit up. "Can I put this on you?" Before Allison could even finish her question, Tasha was already nodding her head.

"There we go, it's a perfect fit." Allison smiled. "Wow, doesn't your daddy have such a pretty princess?" She gushed, and the toddler was practically basking in the attention. Tasha was giggling and even clapping her hands.

"I have one more thing for you. Do you want to know what it is?" Allison asked, and Tasha nodded her head once more. "It's a marshmallow!" Allison said with so much enthusiasm.

Of course, the sight of a marshmallow got Tasha excited. It wasn't even a boring white marshmallow. It was one of those twisty rainbow kinds and Allison had transferred it onto a little plate, which she then placed on the high chair's tray.

"Now, I'm going to go out for a little while and look for another marshmallow, okay?" Allison said. Tasha was previously looking at the marshmallow, but at the mention of another one, she picked her head up and looked at Allison. "You can eat this one if you like, but if I come back and you still have it, you can have one more marshmallow."

"One mow?" Tasha asked.

"Mhm, one more if you wait for me to come back."

"Otay lady." Tasha smiled, and Allison chuckled.

"You can call me Ali, sweetie."

"Otay lady Ali!" Even Steve had to chuckle at that one. Once Tasha was settled and Allison was sure she understood everything, the latter left and closed the door behind her.

"How exactly does this help you determine a Little's age?" Steve asked once Allison rejoined him in the second room. Once Allison started explaining, Steve kind of wished that he hadn't asked... That was a lot of scientific jargon.

"But basically, apart from being some delayed gratification experiment," Allison scoffed, "it allows us to monitor brain activity, in the simplest way I can explain."

"Yeah, sorry." Steve blushed. He wasn't the best at all this new technology.

"Hey, don't worry about it. It's quite complex and I understand you want to know what your Little's being put up to." Allison said with a reassuring smile before looking back down at her tablet, but Steve wasn't really listening anymore.

Steve was just watching Tasha, waiting for any signs of distress. Surprisingly, the toddler seemed fine. Given Tasha's clinginess, he half-expected her to at least look a little sad, but she didn't. Well, Steve was happy that she seemed fine, but he was still surprised. The toddler was just humming some nursery rhyme to herself, and would occasionally poke the marshmallow. At one point Steve thought she was going to eat it, but it turned out Tasha was just curious about how it smelled.

Just before the five minute mark hit, Allison looked up at Steve. "Well, Dr. Banner's right. Tasha's two, one and a half at the youngest."

"I thought this'll give us a more definite answer for her age?" Steve frowned in confusion.

"Captain the best anyone can provide is a six month range." Allison said, but she was still patient about it. "Determining Little age is different from determining actual age. We're working with psychological factors here."

"Right, sorry." Steve blushed.

"Nothing to be sorry about. I'm actually glad you're asking questions." Allison smiled. "Why don't we go back inside and give Tasha her second marshmallow?"

Steve didn't want to embarrass himself any more, so he nodded his head and followed Allison back into the third room. When the door opened, Tasha turned her head to look and smiled widely when she saw her daddy.

"Daddy back!"

"Yeah baby, I told you I'll come back for you." Steve smiled and approached his Little. Tasha was making grabby hands for Steve so of course he picked his Little up and kissed her on the cheek.

"You did very well, Tasha." Allison practically cooed, making Tasha smile at the praise. "As promised, you get two marshmallows for waiting." She said as she held up the plate which now had two marshmallows.

Tasha wasted no time, and she grabbed both marshmallows with both of her hands. Steve wanted to tell Tasha to eat them slowly and one at a time, but he figured he can let his toddler indulge this time.

"Daddy." Tasha surprised Steve by holding out one of the marshmallows to him.

"What do you mean, baby?"

"Daddy ma'yow." Tasha tried to explain.

"I think she's telling you she wants you to have the second one." Allison said with a soft smile.

"Are you sure baby? That's your special marshmallow." Steve said, but his heart was already swelling at how sweet his Little was being. Did Tasha choose to wait for a second one really just so he can have a marshmallow too?

"Uhhuh, daddy ma'yow. Tasha happy ma'yow, daddy happy too." Tasha said. Steve can only guess she meant that a marshmallow made her happy, so she wanted Steve to be happy too. That seemed like a pretty good and sweet interpretation to Steve.

"Thank you baby, but Tasha makes daddy happier than any marshmallow." Steve smiled and kissed Tasha on the nose. He did take the marshmallow though to show Tasha that he really was thankful.

"Daddy happy Tasha too." Tasha said with a big smile. She leaned in and gave Steve an innocent baby kiss on the lips before pulling back to finally munch on her marshmallow. Saying that Steve felt like he was the luckiest Big on earth right now would probably be an understatement.

"She can keep the headband if she likes," Allison said. "I've already deactivated the tech inside it. You can use it like any ordinary headband."

"Well she seems to like it, so thank you." Steve smiled. "Just the ID picture left, right?"

"That's right. Just follow me, please. We'll have to go through reception to get to the studio." Allison said before turning to lead the way.

Steve followed close behind, cooing to Tasha every now and then. The toddler seemed pretty content as she munched on her marshmallow, and she even made sure Steve ate his. When they finally got to the little studio however, Tasha's mood suddenly shifted.

"No mow daddy." Tasha said with a shake of her head. Somehow, Tasha figured out that she and Steve'll have to separate again for this.

"It's just for a little while, baby. Remember that really pretty smile you showed daddy?" Steve asked, and Tasha nodded in response. "Well, that nice man behind the camera wants to see your smile. Maybe the biggest, happiest smile you can give." Steve said as he approached the stool where Tasha would be sitting.

Steve didn't forget his manners though. He looked over to the photographer and nodded in greeting, and the man returned a smile. He seemed to be understanding at least of the situation, and didn't want to say anything in case it'd upset Tasha. Steve noticed a big box by the photographer's feet, and from where Steve was standing he couldn't really see well what was inside. From what he could though, they looked like toys, and new ones at that. He sure hoped they wouldn't have to resort to bribing Tasha to get a picture.

"Sit wif daddy." Tasha insisted, a frown etched on her face as she looked up at Steve.

"Baby I'm sorry, but daddy can't sit with you. Daddy will just be over there, standing with the photographer." Steve tried to explain in a soothing voice. "You'll see daddy the whole time, I promise." It was like a shot in the dark, but Steve had to try and sit Tasha down on the little stool. She obviously didn't look happy about it, but she didn't protest so Steve counted it as a win.

"It'll only be for a little while, then daddy will hold you again, okay?" Steve said soothingly, bending down a bit so he can speak with Tasha properly. The Little didn't respond and just frowned deeply, making Steve sigh. At least she wasn't crying? To get the ordeal over with, Steve stood back up and went to stand by the photographer as promised.

If Steve expected this to go easy, he's wrong. Not only was Tasha refusing to look at the camera, but she was incredibly pouty too. Clearly, five minutes away from her Big was already too much. It should be a bit concerning, but then Steve reminds himself that Nat's been repressing her Little side for years. This is expected.

"Tasha, look over here, sweetheart." It was the photographer who spoke. Steve looked to his left and saw the photographer waving a few toys that made sounds over the camera. _Ah,_ so that's what they're for.

"This is his first time taking a toddler Little's photo, hence the new toys." Allison quietly explained to Steve with a small, amused smile. "He got the news he'd be assigned to Agent Romanoff's picture and well, he came prepared."

"He didn't have to... If they're needed I could have bought them and saved him the trouble." Steve frowned. If Natasha's the only toddler Little in SHIELD, when else would the photographer use these?

"Liam insisted." Allison shrugged. "Don't worry about it, captain. We'll find a use for the toys."

"Tasha look! All the animals are dancing!" Liam said and this time when Steve looked, Liam was holding different toys. Steve chanced a look at his Little and Tasha was not impressed at all. She'd glance at the toys every now and then, but ultimately she was looking at Steve. It was as if she was making sure that he wouldn't leave.

"Baby look at all the animals," Steve encouraged. "they're doing a silly dance for you, see?" This time, Tasha's eyes lingered a little longer on the toys.

"What animals do you see?" Steve asked. He was trying to get Tasha to relax, and make her realize that he wasn't going anywhere.

"Cat, daddy." Tasha said in a really, soft voice.

"That's right. What sound does a cat make?"

"Meow." Tasha answered, and all three Bigs smiled because as small as her meow was, it was adorable.

"What other animals, baby?"

"Cow!"

"Mhm, and does a cow go oink oink?"

"No daddy!" Tasha said, and Steve could see the smallest of smiles start to creep up on her face.

"No? Hm, I thought they oinked." Steve made a show as if he was thinking deeply about it. "Ah! That's right. They go tweet!"

"Noooo!" Tasha was actually smiling now, but she was shaking her head and looking at Steve so Liam couldn't get a proper picture. Realizing that, Steve moved a little closer to Liam so it'd hopefully look like Tasha was looking at the camera.

"Ohh, right... That's a bird. Silly daddy." Steve shook his head. "Cows go..." And Steve made the best goat sound he could muster. Yes, he was fully aware that two other Bigs are with him, and yes, he's slightly embarrassed. But it got Tasha to laugh and Liam was snapping away. The photographer quickly scanned through the shots, and when he gave Steve a smile and thumbs up Steve thanked him and walked over to Tasha.

"Why are you laughing?" Steve asked with a smile as he crouched down in front of Tasha.

"Daddy silly!" Tasha giggled and shook her head.

"Why is daddy silly?"

"Cow go moo!"

"OH! You're right! How could daddy forget?" Steve face palmed and that got Tasha laughing again. "I'm so lucky I have such a smart baby girl." He said with a smile before reaching for Tasha and holding her in his arms. Right at this moment Steve swore he felt like he was holding the most precious gem in the universe. He might as well be.

"We got everything we need, captain Rogers." Allison said just as Steve carefully stood with Tasha in his arms. "Her ID should be ready in five minutes, and we'll be sending up your copy of her documents within the day."

That sounded perfect to Steve, so he just nodded and thanked Allison and Liam before going back out to the reception area so he and Tasha could wait for her ID. Steve just really wanted to hold Tasha right now, so he was glad that the toddler didn't protest when he sat down and kept her on his lap. Steve had his arms around Tasha and was talking to her while she absentmindedly played with Steve's fingers.

They were probably waiting five minutes already when Steve felt it. Until now, he couldn't fully describe how, but he could just tell when Natasha ages up from a drop. Positive emotions were still running through him, but they weren't as amplified as they'd been a few seconds ago.

Apart from that, he found that the reception area was actually a lot louder than he thought. It was as if bonding with Natasha while she's dropped made Steve's world zero in on her. Nothing mattered except Natasha. Now that he's really thinking about it... The times he left Tasha, he felt his heart clench and his stomach drop too.

This is going to be a problem eventually, isn't it?

Logically, Steve knows he can't tune everything else out when he's taking care of Tasha. He can't be with her 24/7 either. It's unhealthy, and it may put both of them at risk. Hopefully, this is all just part of the high of their newly bonded relationship. He'll get the hang of this, right?

It's Nat sliding off his lap that eventually breaks him out of his thoughts. "You okay?" Steve asked softly.

"Yeah, peachy. Just thought I'd give you a little break first, that's all." Natasha shrugged. She seemed embarrassed and wouldn't even look at Steve as she sat down on the seat next to him.

"A break?" Steve frowned. Before he could question her further, Allison approached them so Steve stood first to talk to her. She just came over to give Natasha's Little ID. Steve thanked Allison once more and soon, it was time for the pair to head back to their place.

They walked back in relative silence. At the very least, Natasha was walking beside Steve and not really avoiding him as Steve initially feared she would. She wasn't talking though, and she wasn't looking at him. It bugged Steve more than it probably should have, but he just thought that they were making progress. This all seemed like a step back.

"Nat what's wrong?" Steve asked as they went inside the residence building.

"Nothing, my head's just feeling a little fuzzy from the drop." Nat said with a shrug, but she was still avoiding looking at him.

"Fuzzy like you need to drop again?" Steve asked gently.

"No." Natasha's eyebrows knit together. "Sorry, I don't mean to sound so tense." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment as they reached the elevator and Steve pressed the button for going up.

Once they got on the elevator, Natasha shook her head to herself and started to pull off her hair ties and consequently, the braids. Honestly, Steve was a little sad to see them go. Nat looked quite adorable in them, and it wasn't like Natasha never wore braids. The smart man that he is though, Steve at least bit his tongue when it came to that.

"You sure you're okay?" Steve asked. Every fiber in his being told him that Natasha wasn't okay, but he still asked.

"I'm fine. I'll be fine. Jeez, Steve. Stop worrying so much or your age'll catch up to you. I can practically see the wrinkles forming on your face right now." Steve wasn't new to this. He knew Natasha was trying to play it off: Act nonchalant and throw in some humor or insult here and there to throw people off guard. It usually worked, but not on Steve (and okay, not on Clint either).

Steve sighed and just about opened his mouth to respond, but the elevator stopped. It was much too quick of a ride, so he was sure they weren't at their floor yet. True enough, the elevator doors opened not to their floor, but to Tony.

"A little late to your own lunch party?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise mid-week update for y'all because I haven't posted in forever (~^_^)~
> 
> Got a few questions for you guys :o
> 
> 1\. Who do you think Steve wrote down as Nat's legal caretaker?  
> 2\. Honestly, what do you guys think about this so far? I'm enjoying writing it, but I want to know how you guys feel about it too~ If there're any adjustments you want me to make... maybe anything you're hoping to happen? Or not happen? I'll see if I can do something about 'em hehe  
> 3\. Now this one's for waaaay down the line (if it even is going to happen in the first place lol), but... if ever Nat would have a love interest, would you guys feel better if the person's an OC, or if they're someone from the MCU?
> 
> Also note if 3 does happen, it's not gonna be in this work lol. I'm planning to make this a series (yay). So hopefully by the time it does happen, you guys would've forgotten about me asking hehe ~(^_^~)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because all your comments made me excited (~^_^)~ Here's a second update for the week yaaay  
> A little shorter than the rest but I hope you guys'll like it~

"Well it's not really a party. It's just the three of us." Steve pointed out, but he had a smile on his face as Tony stepped into the elevator.

Crap. Why did they have to bump into Stark? Natasha was hoping she could at least change her outfit before he dropped by. So long as Tony doesn't comment on it, she'll be fine...

"How're you doing, Nat?" Tony asked as the elevator resumed its ascent.

"I've had better days." As soon as the words left Natasha's mouth, she wanted to take them back. Sure, it was the truth... But it was also a little insensitive to Steve. Natasha knew Steve was doing his best to not make this a shit experience for her--or okay, to take care of her. The least she could do was show some appreciation.

Natasha chanced a glance at Steve, and luckily he didn't seem to be offended. He didn't seem happy though, either. Great.

"It's bright and sunny pastures from here on out now that you've got me." Tony said with a wink, making Natasha manage a scoff. "I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that and I'll just ask Cap what's for lunch."

"Baked salmon, but you're a little too early." Steve said sheepishly. "I haven't really started on it yet."

"That's fine, I can help. I'm good around the kitchen." Tony shrugged.

"But you're the guest." Steve pointed out with a shake of his head as they got to their floor.

"Then consider me a very helpful one." Tony winked. "Don't worry, I won't get in your way."

"I'll help out too, I'll just get dressed first." Natasha said as they walked back to Steve's, or rather _their_ apartment. Yes, they're leaving again after lunch and ideally with Natasha dropped. Right now though she's aged and there's no way in hell she's staying in her Tasha clothes... Even though they're probably the most comfortable clothes Nat's worn in a while.

"No you're not. You're supposed to be taking it easy." Tony said without even looking at Natasha.

Taking it easy? What's that supposed to mean? Natasha furrowed her eyebrows together and looked at Tony. "Why? Because I'm a toddler? Need I remind you I'm fully capable of--"

"Not because you're a toddler Little. Sheesh take a chill pill." Tony cut Natasha off, and the latter was not at all pleased by that. "Take it easy because it's an adjustment period for you."

"It's an adjustment period for Steve too." Natasha countered. Granted, she knew what Tony meant. He didn't just mean an adjustment period to being heartmates with Steve. It's an adjustment period to being a Little in general. Tony's right and she hated it.

"Is that your not-so-subtle way of telling me I should wait on the two of you hand and foot?" Tony asked, but Natasha knew he was just teasing so she didn't grace that with a response.

"I'd appreciate your help, Nat." Steve stepped in to diffuse the situation as usual. He definitely seemed careful about his words. _I'd appreciate your help,_ not _you can help_. Because Natasha can do whatever the hell she wanted and Steve knew that. Or maybe she was just reading into this too much.

"Great. It'll be given after I get changed." If Tony still had his own opinions about that, he didn't voice them anymore... For once.

Once they got back to the apartment, Natasha split and headed straight for her room. Left with her own thoughts and nothing to distract her, that's when it hit: Today's going to be a "make it or break it" kind of thing between her and Steve. Yes, Steve promised he'll stay with her no matter what. But that's also what's bothering Natasha so much. Don't get her wrong: It touched her to hear those words coming from Steve... But it seemed like Steve was willing to drop everything for her, does that mean she should do the same?

Apart from that, there's also the guilt. She didn't want Steve to drop everything for her. Yes, they're heartmates but Steve's also his own person. That means he should be able to do whatever he wants without feeling like he's tied down by her, right? Then again, Natasha knew shit about this whole heartmate gimmick. For all she knew, maybe it really is the norm.

Back in the kitchen, Tony was holding true to his promise of helping Steve with lunch. "So how have you been?" Tony asked as he helped Steve take out the ingredients.

"It's been rough, but Natasha's adjusting. I think we're getting there, although slowly." Steve replied

"I don't think you heard my question." Tony said, making Steve look at him with a confused expression. "I can ask Natasha how she is, but what I'm asking now is how _you_ are doing."

"Right, sorry." It may have been just a few days now, but Steve was already used to putting Natasha first. "I'm doing well, I mean I'm happy. You know how I always worried that I left my one chance of having a heartmate back in... Yeah."

"And I can imagine your relief when you found out that your heartmate's actually here, and it's Nat." Tony said.

"Honestly, now that I know she is I can't imagine it being anyone else." It may be sappy, but it's true. "It's exciting, but also kind of nerve-wracking."

"What's gotten your star-spangled tighties in a bunch?" Tony asked as he started slicing the potatoes.

"I don't want to mess it up." Steve admitted softly. "Tony, she's the most precious thing in my life right now." A blush made its way to Steve's cheeks when he admitted that. He ducked his head and focused on removing the little bones from the fish to hide it.

"Why do you think you're going to mess up?"

"I know I've taken care of Littles before, but it feels different with Nat. It feels so natural to take care of her but at the same time I'm worried I'm doing something wrong."

"It's different now because you're Heartmates." Tony pointed out the obvious. "Steve you're a natural when it comes to taking care of Littles. You're probably the textbook definition of perfect Heartmate--"

"Tony--"

"Ah ah, I'm not done." Tony returned the favor and cut Steve off too. "I haven't seen much of you and Natasha since she first dropped, but from what I gathered--AKA from Clint, you're doing great. Knowing Natasha she probably would've fought tooth and nail before anyone could get her to go on a Little shopping spree. But you managed to do it unscathed. You think I would've managed that?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"The right answer is no." Tony rolled his eyes. "Nat trusts you, Steve. She always has and you know it, and that's perfect. Because the most important thing to have with your Heartmate is trust."

"I did notice that she's been more receptive of me recently." Steve said as he plucked what was hopefully the last bone off the fish. He thought back to breakfast and how Nat actually came to him when she needed him. Granted, Natasha didn't voice that she needed Steve; but her seeking him like that was definitely progress.

"See? And you've only been at it for a few days." Tony said as he finished slicing the potatoes. "At this point in our relationship, Clint and I were a right mess."

"Yeah, I remember." Steve chuckled. Tony was still new to the whole "being a good Big" concept and bonding with Clint freaked him out a little.

Both parties initially tried to ignore it, but the inevitable happened and they couldn't very well ignore the elephant in the room. It was a tough transition for both Clint and Tony given they weren't really the best of friends, but they managed to pull through; but not without giving everyone else headaches too. Tony's insistence on there being a right or prescribed way to caretake, combined with Clint's trademark stubbornness definitely did not make a good combination.

"Glad to know you find my misery amusing."

"You weren't miserable." Steve pointed out. He can clearly remember Tony loving the good challenge of trying to make his Heartmate relationship work. Despite all the annoyances Clint and Tony had, everyone knew that the pair put up with it because they wanted to make it work.

"True. It wasn't really the ideal experience, but hey we got here." Tony shrugged. "Just salt and pepper for the potatoes?"

"A little olive oil too." Steve said, and Tony nodded in response.

"So, you excited for your vacation?" Tony asked as he seasoned the potato slices.

"I am, actually." Steve smiled. "I'm hoping the time away from here will help her better adjust to everything. Have you cleared your schedules? You know, just in case."

"Mhm and Fury's going to have a field day once he finds out most of his Avengers will be gone for a week." Tony said. "And I love that I'm one of the causes of that."

"I'm sure you do." Steve rolled his eyes in good nature. He was thankful that the team agreed to come along if Nat's comfortable with it. A lot of them used up almost all of their remaining vacation days for this. He felt a little guilty, but it's for Natasha. And it wasn't like he had to beg them to come, right? It warmed his heart to know that people really do care about her like this. Hopefully Natasha would see it this way too.

"Hey Tony, can you pass me the--" Steve stopped mid sentence because when he turned around, he saw Natasha just standing by the doorway that separated the kitchen and the dining room. "Hey Nat." He said with a soft smile.

Natasha was back to wearing her usual sweats and tank, her hair neatly held back in one french braid. "I came to help." Natasha said.

"I know, thank you." Steve said appreciatively. "Why don't you work on the sauce? The recipe's right there on the tablet next to Tony."

"You got to pick out a movie already?" Tony asked as Nat came to his side.

"No not really." Natasha said, and she didn't bother to offer more than that. There was still some unease in the back of her mind, and despite all her training she was finding it hard to conceal. The fact that she drops already was like a dead weight bearing down in the room. She knew Tony was thinking it and it was making her uncomfortable. That, and she didn't want to screw this up. Make it or break it, right?

"That's fine. I love me some spontaneity." Tony shrugged. He'd already put the potatoes in a little pan and moved to bring them to the oven.

"We can pick before leaving." Natasha said in a bit of a rush, causing Tony to actually stop walking for a moment but he easily caught himself. Maybe Tony was being sarcastic about spontaneity?

"Easy, red. We'll do what you want to do." Tony said as he placed the potatoes into the preheated oven.

No, it isn't supposed to go this way. Natasha already thought about this before leaving her room: She's just supposed to go with the flow. _Fuck_ why was she even so keen on getting Tony to like her? On trying to be a good Little? Wasn't she supposed to hate this? It was as if being around a new person was amplifying all of Nat's insecurities about her Little status.

"Nat." Natasha didn't even realize she spaced out. She blinked a few times before looking up at Steve. The moment she did, it was as if a lot of weight was lifted off her body. "Can you come here for a moment?" Crap.

"Um, yeah sure." Nat tried to play it off cool, but really she was worried. Was Steve pissed? Is he going to tell her off for messing things up between him and Tony? Fuck, why was she so hell bent on doing this right? "What do you need?"

"I was thinking I could show you how to make the salad instead." Steve said. He stepped back from the counter and Natasha looked at him suspiciously. "I just know you like it, so I wanted to show you if you want to learn how to make it." He explained calmly.

In truth, Steve sensed that Natasha was feeling anxious. Nat's one of SHIELD's best, but right now Steve could've mistaken her for a new recruit. He wasn't banking on the chance that Nat would come to him for comfort now since Tony's here, so he was trying to find subtler ways to be there for Nat. He didn't press anymore, but Natasha eventually nodded her head and stood in front of the cutting board.

"I'll show you how to chop the vegetables first." Steve put a tomato on the chopping board before moving to stand behind Natasha. "Can you pick up the knife?"

Natasha frowned: Of course she could. She didn't snap at Steve though and just nodded her head as she reached for the knife. Seconds later, Steve's hand was over hers, and his other hand guided her left over to the tomato. "We want to slice them juuust like this. About this thick." He said as he guided Natasha's hands.

"Steve, I'm okay." Natasha said softly, her cheeks blushing slightly. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what Steve was doing.

"I know." Steve said softly. He also noted that Nat didn't pull away, so he continued on. "You're getting the hang of it: I'm barely even guiding you now."

The praise shouldn't have affected Natasha as much as it had, but she felt her chest swelling with pride. "You want to try another one together?" Steve asked once they finished one tomato.

 _No,_ Natasha thought. She was capable of doing this herself. "Yeah okay." Her mouth betrayed her, but she didn't take it back. Steve just smiled and set aside the sliced tomatoes before grabbing another one. As Steve guided Natasha's hands once more, Nat found herself slowly relaxing. When they say the Heartmate connection's therapeutic, they aren't kidding.

"Thanks, Steve." Nat said in a hushed voice. They were done with the tomatoes and have moved on to the cucumber by then.

"No need to thank me." Steve said before planting a kiss on the top of Natasha's head, letting his lips linger there for a moment. Now that her heart wasn't beating so rapidly, Nat found herself thinking more clearly now. She sighed and shook her head to herself: This is her life now, and she needs to get used to it. There's no point in panicking. This is what's right. You can trust Steve.

"What's the matter?" Steve asked. Crap, she almost forgot he's just there.

"It's nothing. I'm fine, I promise." Nat said as she turned her head a little to look up at Steve. "I think I can take it from here." She said with the smallest of smiles. Although the fact that Steve had to comfort her like that in front of Tony embarrassed her a little, she was still grateful. Who knows what she would've done if Steve hadn't stepped in?

"Alright, I trust you not to mess it up." Steve smiled and gave her a wink.

"I'm eating it too, so you bet I won't." Natasha chuckled. Steve lingered for a little more but he eventually pulled back. For the remainder of their lunch prep, Steve made sure to stay close to Natasha. Not too close though so as not to make her self-conscious. Natasha noticed, and she actually appreciated it.

When Tony sensed that Nat was feeling better, he tried talking to her again and found that it was a lot easier than his initial try. It was a relief to both Bigs. At lunch, Steve didn't sit at the head of the table and instead sat next to Natasha, with Tony sitting across from him. Thankfully, lunch went a lot better than Steve expected it to. You wouldn't even think that anything's changed... Until it was almost time to go.

"Do you need help dropping?" Steve asked Natasha in a gentle voice.

Natasha closed her eyes and tilted her head back before taking a deep breath. "Maybe." She mumbled.

"Okay, come here." Steve said softly as he pushed his chair back and turned to face Natasha. Nat frowned in confusion for a moment, until she understood.

"Here?"

"It's okay baby. It's just Tony." Steve said in a soothing voice. Now Nat probably wouldn't admit it to anyone, not even Steve, but she found that she actually liked it when Steve called her baby even when she's aged: It made her feel loved.

To his credit, Tony wasn't really watching them because he knew Natasha wouldn't be quite comfortable. He was scrolling his phone looking for a movie they could watch. "Don't mind me, I'm just looking for a movie."

"He's seen lots of Littles drop, heck he sees Clint drop all the time." Steve said. "I know you're nervous baby, but we're trying to show you that it's okay to be vulnerable especially with us. We'll never hold it against you." He said in a quieter voice. He was hoping that his subtle comfort with Nat earlier would've eased her into being more accepting of it in front of Tony.

Natasha bit back a groan because she knows Steve's right. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose for a moment before opening her eyes and looking at Steve. "Fine." She mumbled, but it was a good enough response. Steve's making an effort for this to work so she has to do her part too, right?

Once Nat pushed back her chair, Steve reached for his Little and easily sat her down on his lap straddling him. "You're safe with me." Steve reminded her in a soft, soothing voice as he held Natasha comfortingly.

Nat could practically feel her cheeks heating up, but she just nodded and hid her face in Steve's chest. Pushing all the embarrassment aside, Steve's arms were a pretty good place to be in. She really did fit perfectly in Steve's arms and some part of her loved it. It felt as if she was meant to be there all along.

Tony looked up at them and made eye contact with Steve, the latter of whom nodded. He got the signal and easily stood up to walk over to their side, sitting down on Natasha's seat. They're here to show Nat that it's okay to be Little, so Tony was definitely helping with that.

"Hey Nat," Tony's voice was gentle too. It was the voice he usually reserved for their Little teammates when they're dropped or need some caretaking. "I found a couple of movies you might like. You wanna hear 'em?"

Natasha didn't look up, but she nodded her head. Her hands were trapped between her and Steve, and she was clutching Steve's shirt in her fists.

"What about Christopher Robin?" The cinemas in town always played Little-friendly movies, whether old or new. Natasha thought about it for a moment before shaking her head.

"No? Okay, not a problem. I've got plenty." Tony shrugged as Steve started to rub Natasha's back. "What about Elmo?"

"That crap's scary." Natasha's voice was muffled, but Tony heard that clearly. Both Bigs chuckled at that: Of all the things that could scare Nat, it was Sesame Street.

"Okay, not that then." Tony said in a slightly amused tone. Natasha finally turned her head so she was facing out now, but she still had her head on Steve's chest and her hands clutching his shirt. Her head was getting a little fuzzy and Steve could sense that she was close to dropping.

"Despicable Me?" Tony asked.

"Yeah you are." Natasha said and Steve snorted. He looked down and was pleased to find that Nat had a small smile on her face.

"I'm trying to help here." Tony said, but he was smiling too. He and Nat weren't the closest in the team, but he still cared about her and he was happy she seemed well enough to tease. "So no?"

"I haven't heard of that." Nat admitted. She wasn't big on movies, especially kids movies. She only knew about Christopher Robin and Sesame Street because they used to watch those in the Red Room; though not for entertainment.

"It's about some villain wannabe and three little girls. They have these minions who look like stunted bananas and talk like the Sims."

"Sounds despicable." Natasha said, and Steve shook his head in amusement. "But I guess that's okay."

"So we've got a movie?" Steve asked his Little. "You wanna watch Despicable Me?" He asked before kissing the top of Natasha's head.

"I guess so." Natasha said before turning her head again to hide in Steve's chest. She took a deep, shaky breath because she started to feel like she was losing control. It wasn't a sensation she quite enjoyed.

"Baby it's okay. Just let go." Steve said in a soothing voice. "You can drop, I've got you. You're doing so well, I know you're trying." He said as he somehow managed to hold Natasha a little closer. It'll take time for Natasha to get used to controlling her drops, so Steve was more than happy to help her out.

"I'll book us some tickets." Tony said quietly so as not to jostle Natasha. Steve gave him a grateful smiled and nodded his head before mouthing the words _thank you_. He kissed the top of Natasha's head one more time before deciding to pat Nat's bum, hoping it'd help soothe her as it usually worked when Daisy gets upset or needs to be put down for a nap.

A few moments later, Nat was suddenly nuzzling her face into Steve's chest. "Nat?" Steve spoke softly. The Little looked up and smiled when she saw Steve.

"Hi daddy." Upon hearing Tasha's usual sweet voice, Steve broke out into a smile.

"Hi baby." Steve all but cooed. "Look who we have with us." He said as he nudged Tasha to look at Tony, which she did.

"Tin man!" Tasha exclaimed and again, Steve snorted. When he saw the mildly offended look on Tony's face he couldn't help but laugh.

" _Tin_ man?" Tony asked. He and Nat have definitely been here before. How many times does he have to explain this to people?

"Tin man!" Tasha confirmed. The toddler looked absolutely pleased and even clapped her hands.

"I'll have you know, my suit is not made of _tin_." Tony tends to get a bit defensive about his tech. For someone to liken his suit to that of some character form the Wizard of Oz? Unacceptable. "It's made of a nickel-titanium alloy--"

"Tony." Steve cut him off, and again Tony looked mildly offended. That was quickly changed when he saw Tasha.

"Oh, oh hey I'm sorry Tasha." Tony instantly calmed down. He hadn't even realized he got upset with the toddler. Now Tasha's eyes were shining with unshed tears and her lips were trembling dangerously. He leaned down a little so he can be more levelled with Tasha's face. "I'm not mad at you. I'm sorry if I scared you."

Really? He had to lecture a freaking toddler Little about a suit? Keep it together, Tony.

"You can call me tin man if you like." It pained Tony to say, but if it would stop Tasha from crying then so be it.

"Or you can call him uncle Tony." Steve offered in that same gentle voice. He was hoping (Na)Tasha and Tony would hit it off considering they're probably two of the most important people in his life right now.

"U'cle Tony?" Tasha sniffled and wiped one of her cheeks with the back of her hand. That's great: Tony just made Tasha cry.

"Yeah that's right. You can call me uncle Tony." Tony said before offering her a comforting smile. He reached out and carefully wiped another stray tear with the pad of his thumb. He can still fix this, it isn't too late.

"No mad?"

"No, I'm not mad. Uncle Tony was just being silly." Tony said with a shake of his head. "I'm sorry I made you sad."

"It otay." Tasha said softly.

"Do you want to give uncle Tony a hug?" Steve asked his Little, to which she nodded her head before sitting up and making grabby hands for her uncle.

Tony was a bit surprised that Tasha was so willing to get cuddles from him. Clint wasn't kidding when he said Tasha and Nat are opposites in many ways. Of course he was careful this time and made sure not to let his shock show in case that'd upset Tasha. He just smiled as he reached for the Little and held her on his lap.

"Wow, this munchkin gives really good hugs." Tony smiled. He's held quite a few Littles before, but as early as now Tony's sure Tasha's in his top three; and not just because she's Steve's heartmate.

"Tasha no munchin." Tasha said as she pulled back from the hug and looked up at Tony with a little pout.

"No? Not a munchkin? What are you then?" Tony asked as he tickled Tasha's tummy, effectively making her giggle.

"Tasha baby, no munchin." She said as she patted herself with both hands, indicating that she was in fact talking about herself.

"Well your daddy calls you baby, so I don't want to take that from him." Tony explained, making Steve blush a little and smile. "So to me, you're munchkin. Munchkins are cute, don't worry." He said as he gave her a little tap on the nose.

"U'cle Tony silly." Tasha told Steve. Natasha would have probably said that Tony's despicable, so Tony'll take silly.

"Yeah, uncle Tony can be silly sometimes." Steve said with a smile. "Does he give good hugs?"

"Uhhuh, but daddy goodest." Tasha said with a big smile.

"Can't argue against that." Tony chuckled before giving Tasha a light squeeze. And again, Clint's right: Natasha makes an adorable toddler. Never in Tony's right mind would he have guessed he'd ever have that thought.

"I think we should go and get her dressed first." Steve said once he remembered their little incident this morning. He didn't want to make that mistake again. As much as possible he really didn't want Tasha peeing on Tony.

"Ah come on, I just got her." Tony said, and not without a pout.

"Alright, if you're fine with potentially getting peed on then by all means let's just stay here." Steve teased, and that got a reaction from Tony.

"Right, I forgot about that bit." Tony said as he looked down at the toddler on his lap as if she was a ticking time bomb. Tony can handle Littles, but maybe not when they're covered in pee... or worse. Tony almost shuddered at the thought. With regards to this aspect of having a Heartmate, Tony's glad Clint's 12. Tasha's cute and all, but nope Tony will not be changing any diapers.

"I'll take her." Steve said as he rolled his eyes in good nature, but he had a smile on his face. He can tell Tony was freaking out at the prospect of getting peed on, so he reached over and took Tasha back.

"Mhm, yeah. She probably wants you anyway." Tony tried to play it off cool and had to hold back a sigh of relief once Tasha was off his lap. He can hold her again once she's properly dressed.

"Sure, Tony." Steve chuckled and stood up with Tasha in his arms, but he did give Tasha a kiss on her little nose. "Can you maybe grab me some clothes for her please while I get a diaper on her?"

"Of course." Tony nodded. "Did Clint already tell you that you speak motherese when you talk to her?" Tony pointed out, an amused smile on his face as he stood and followed Clint to Tasha's would-be nursery.

"No, and it's the 21st century, Tony. It's called parentese." Steve said. "Keep up."

"Oh wow well excuse me. Look who's caught up with the times." Tony laughed, and Steve chuckled too. When they got to Tasha's room, Steve grabbed a diaper and laid Tasha down on the bed while Tony looked for some clothes for the Little.

"Ah ah, no feet baby. Those are icky." Steve shook his head and stopped Tasha from putting her foot into her mouth.

"Daddyyyyy." Tasha whined. She was evidently upset about her attempt of eating her foot being thwarted. Tony was luckily quick so he grabbed the soother he found and handed it to Steve who thanked him for it.

"Babyyyy." Steve whined back, making Tasha giggle before Steve gently placed the soother between her lips. "Is that better?" He asked, and Tasha nodded her head so Steve proceeded to get his Little changed.

"Is this okay?" Tony asked just as Steve was sliding a diaper under Tasha's bum. He was holding up a white pink long-sleeve that had the word "princess" in shiny letters, and white floral skirt to go with it.

"Yeah I think that should be good." Steve said as he put Tasha's legs down. "She should have some stockings or knee-high socks in there too. I think it'll be better to put her in some so she won't get cold."

"Good thinking." Tony said before he went back to look for some socks or stockings. "See? You've got it under control, Steve. I honestly wouldn't have thought of that."

"Hopefully it'll stay that way." Steve said softly.


	15. Chapter 15

Getting Tasha ready to go was surprisingly easy. After she was dressed, Steve just had to clean up a little too and soon, they were on their way. Given the potential to have team dinner tonight if all went well, Steve and Tony agreed to just go to the nearby mall: It wasn't the best, but it was good enough. He'll just have to make sure to bring Tony and Tasha out on a proper date some other time.

"Okay baby, we're here." Steve announced as he parked the car and turned the engine off. Upon hearing that, Tasha practically cheered.

"Movie movie movie!" The toddler's chants were muffled because she still had the soother planted firmly in her mouth, but Tony and Steve understood her clearly anyway.

"Someone's excited." Tony chuckled as he and Steve got out of the car so the latter can retrieve Tasha from her car seat.

"It's her first movie, she's bound to be." Steve smiled and opened the back door. "Hi baby. You ready to watch the movie?"

"Yes! Daddy go go go!" In her excitement, the soother fell out of Tasha's lips. Luckily, Steve had the foresight and attached it to Tasha's top earlier with a clip. She was struggling against the car seat's belts so Steve had a bit of a hard time getting her out, but he eventually did.

"No no daddy walk p'ease!" Tasha shook her head when Steve held her on his hip. The toddler just had so much energy right now and she was terribly excited: There was no way she was just going to stay up there!

"Okay, but you always hold daddy's and uncle Tony's hands." Steve told Tasha before carefully setting her down.

"Otay daddy!" Tasha smiled and reached for Steve's hand before reaching for Tony's. Tony was admittedly still surprised that Tasha was so comfortable with him, but it was a pleasant one at that. He just thought that given his and Nat's practically-just-civil relationship, maybe Tasha would be shy around him at best. For once, he was glad he was wrong about something.

Holding Tasha's hand in his as the toddler walked between him and Steve made Tony a lot happier than he thought it would. It all just felt so right.

"Uh oh. Okay let's be careful now." Steve said gently as he tightened his hold on Tasha a bit and hoisted her up. Tony then looked between them and realized that Tasha must have almost fallen down onto her knees: Yup, definitely a clumsy toddler still wobbly on her feet.

"Tasha big giwl." The Little said mostly to herself, but Steve voiced his agreement anyway.

The mall was pretty small, so it didn't take them long to find the cinemas. Since Tony already bought their tickets, the trio just lined up to get some snacks.

"What do you want to eat, baby?" Steve asked as he lifted Tasha up to sit on the counter so she can see her choices better. "Go and get anything you like, Tony." He told Tony after he made sure Tasha was steady and held her by her hips just in case.

"Popcown." Tasha said and clapped her hands, to which Steve smiled in response before turning to the employee.

"What flavors do you have?"

"We have the usual, sir: Cheese, butter, barbecue, sour cream, and white cheddar." The employee informed them. Steve noticed that the employee kept looking at Tasha and he couldn't help but feel a little protective. By now, news got out about the Black Widow's toddler status so they were trying to avoid social media until the inevitable flames died down.

Last night Steve made the mistake of checking his phone and his heart broke at what he read. Majority were excited and so accepting of the news: They thought it was badass that a toddler Little like Natasha saved the world more times than they can count. But then there were the skeptics. Are toddler Littles capable of defending them? Is there tax money being put to good use with Natasha?

Well hell fucking yes. Granted, there were more people who were supportive of Natasha but Steve couldn't shake off what the minority were thinking. He's just so protective of his Little.

So now, he felt even more cautious about letting Tasha interact with strangers. He can't very well just shield her from the rest of the world, but he can easily take her out of a situation if Steve saw fit. Quite frankly, the way the employee kept eyeing his Little was bothering him.

"Cheese p'ease!" Tasha smiled up at the employee, who then gave her a warm smile back. Okay, maybe Steve overreacted. Actually, now that Steve thought about it, the employee actually seemed to be a Little too.

"Cheese popcorn for a very pretty little princess coming right up." The employee said, making Tasha giggle and clap her hands again.

"Easy, Steve. There's no threat. You look ready to jump into battle." Steve hadn't even realized that his shoulders were so tensed until Tony called him out.

"Sorry, can't help but feel a little protective." Steve sighed.

"You don't have to be sorry for being protective." Tony said with a pointed look. "I'm just saying relax. Your break's supposed to be relaxing for both of you, not just Natasha."

Steve didn't really know how to respond to that, so he just said a quiet "I know" before giving Tasha a kiss on her forehead.

A little while later, the employee came back with Tasha's popcorn and the toddler Little smiled and thanked him. That earned her a praise from Steve for being so polite, before Steve ordered snacks for himself and Tony. He also bought apple juice which Tony helpfully transferred into Tasha's sippy cup from the diaper bag.

Just when they were about to leave, the employee spoke up.

"Captain, sir, um, captain sir?"

Tony had to hold back a snicker, but Steve gave him a look before turning to the employee with Tasha in his arms this time. "You can call me Steve, it's fine."

"Okay, sorry sir." Steve didn't have it in him to correct the employee another time. The employee was clearly nervous about something so he didn't want to make it worse for the boy. "I just, um... Can you please tell miss Romanoff thank you when she's aged?"

"Well of course, but I think it should be us who's thanking you." Steve pointed out in confusion. "May I ask what this is about?"

Steve could tell that the employee was hesitant, but he eventually nodded his head. "I've always been so insecure about my toddler status. It just made me feel a little useless I guess, at least compared to my peers?" Steve wanted to interject then, but he was polite and let the employee continue first.

"But now knowing that the Black Widow's a toddler Little renewed my hope, you know? I mean, if she can kick ass--I mean, kick butt? Sorry." Steve chuckled softly and shook his head at the boy. "If she can do all that and come home at the end of the day as a toddler... Then I can do something great too, right? I don't plan on fighting aliens like you guys, but she gave me a little bit more hope about what I can do."

"So I guess I just wanted to thank her because I could look at myself in the mirror in a better light now." Of course SHIELD kept the truth about Nat's lack of drops prior to this under wraps. They couldn't really hide Nat's toddler status, but that didn't mean the public had to know all the details. From what Steve gathered, SHIELD made it look like Natasha's documents were just lost in the whole mess of things and they haven't really bothered to publicly announce her status.

"I'll make sure she gets the message. Though I'm pretty sure Nat'll remember this on her own. She's a pretty perceptive Little." Steve smiled.

"Baby happy!" Tasha said with a big smile. She was holding her popcorn with both hands and after smiling at the boy, she tried to eat her snack with just her mouth.

"Baby please don't..." But it was already done and Tasha was happily munching away on some popcorn, her cheeks now covered in cheese powder. "Anyway, I think she's trying to say that she's happy you're happy." He smiled at the employee.

"Or she's happy about her popcorn." The employee said with a soft chuckle.

"Probably that too." Steve said. "But regardless, this is really good to hear. I'm sure Nat will be very happy about this. I'm sorry, I don't think I quite caught your name earlier?"

"It's Isaac, sir."

"Alright, thank you Isaac. I'll make sure Nat gets the message when she's aged and not covered in cheese." Steve smiled.

"Thank you, sir. I hope you three enjoy your movie." Isaac said politely. The trio thanked him one more time before finally turning to leave and go to their respective cinema.

"Well that was a pleasant surprise." Tony said as they walked up the stairs to their seats.

"You're telling me." Hearing words like that coming from a complete stranger made Steve so happy that he only hoped Natasha would feel the same way. "I noticed he kept looking at Tasha, but I didn't think that was why."

"So that's why you looked ready to pounce him earlier." Tony chuckled. They'd finally reached their row and Tony led the way to their seats, where Steve of course sat Tasha down in between the two of them.

"I said I was sorry." Steve practically groaned. He shook his head in amusement as he grabbed some wipes from the diaper bag and tried to clean Tasha's cheeks with them. "I think this one thinks she's a cat like her Nini."

"Meow." Tasha smiled up at Steve. Yup, cheeky even as a toddler.

"She makes one adorable kitten." Tony chuckled, and Steve couldn't agree more.

It didn't take long for the trailers to start rolling and consequently, for the lights to go off. Little Tasha hadn't anticipated that to happen so she got a bit scared when it was dark all of a sudden. A soft whimper escaped her lips and her hold on her popcorn tightened significantly. When Steve heard the whimper, he felt bad: He should have anticipated this and at least prepared Tasha for the lights to be going out.

"Hey baby, it's okay." Steve cooed as he bent down a bit to talk to her better. "Daddy and uncle Tony are right here. You're safe. We're going to watch a fun movie, right?"

Tasha didn't look quite convinced with her wobbly lower lip and wide, scared eyes but she hesitantly nodded her head. "It dawk daddy." She said in an incredibly small voice.

"I know baby, but look: There's a big TV right there. That's where the movie is going to play on. It's so big, isn't it?"

"Big." Tasha confirmed in a soft voice, but she was already sniffling by then. Little Tasha absolutely hated the dark. She knew her daddy and uncle Tony are just right there, but that doesn't change the fact that the dark is such a scary place to be in!

Steve was quick to pick up on his Little's distress, and he hated that he didn't think to prepare for this. Tasha looked so close to having a breakdown that Steve just went on autopilot. He lifted up the armrest that separated his chair from Tasha's and easily lifted her onto his lap. The effect was almost instantaneous: Once Tasha felt her daddy's arms wrap around her, it was as if the room didn't seem so dark anymore. That didn't mean she wanted to leave the safety of his arms though, and Steve was perfectly okay with that.

"She going to be okay?" Steve didn't even realize Tony transferred to Tasha's seat until he spoke. He was too busy cooing comforting words into Tasha's ear and soothingly rubbing his Little's tummy.

"She's a little spooked, but she'll be okay." Steve said softly before kissing the top of Tasha's head.

Tony had no doubts about that: He saw how Tasha's demeanor shifted once she was in Steve's arms. It was almost dizzying how quickly Steve was able to comfort his Little. Being a Big himself though, he can sense that Tasha wasn't completely at ease just yet. With that, he gently offered his hand to the Little who looked at it in confusion.

"I think I'm a little nervous and need someone's hand to hold." Tony said in a quiet, gentle voice. "Will you hold my hand so I feel safe?"

For a moment, Tasha just looked at Tony. It was as if the toddler was gauging if he was telling the truth or if he was simply bullshitting her... Which was ridiculous because Tony knows Tasha's a two year old but still: He can't shake off the feeling. This is still Natasha and she's chock full of surprises. Luckily, Tasha seemed to believe him, or at least was willing to accept the comfort in disguise.

Tasha said nothing in response, but she did reach for Tony's hand and nope: She wasn't holding his hand, she was holding one of his fingers like how a real baby would and Tony couldn't help but smile at that. It was a bit of an awkward position to watch a movie, but he's soldiered through worse.

"Thank you, Tony." Steve had a grateful smile on his face as he looked at the other man. He knew Tony didn't have to do that, so he was touched that he offered any help at all.

"Mhm, just make sure she doesn't chew my finger off or something." Tony said with a soft chuckle. It was meant as a joke, but deep down Tony was genuinely worried that the toddler was going to use his finger as a makeshift pacifier: Toddlers can be so unpredictable!

"I'll keep an eye out." Steve shook his head in amusement.

Well, Steve tried to keep his promise. Sometimes Tasha was just too quick even for Captain America. Three times the toddler managed to put Tony's finger in her mouth, and three times Tony grimaced and had to fight back a groan. Steve kept apologizing and Tony seriously considered pulling his hand back from Tasha's grip, but one quick look at the toddler on Steve's lap and his mind always changes. There was no way he was going to make such a precious Little cry.

Thankfully, apart from Tony's finger almost getting chewed off a couple of times, their movie experience just went uphill from there. At some point, Tasha even relaxed enough to actually let go of Tony's hand so she can eat her snacks (Tony pretended not to be so relieved by this). The Little girl seemed to be thoroughly enjoying the movie, and both Bigs were happy about that.

"Did you like it baby?" Steve asked Tasha once the credits were rolling.

"Tasha like! Nanas funny an' cute an' f'uffy howsie!" Tasha smiled up at Steve just as she reached up to tiredly rub her eye.

"Now she thinks the minions are bananas. Thanks, Tony." Steve told Tony with an amused smile before turning back to Tasha.

"Daddy like?" Tasha asked before letting out a yawn.

"Mhm, I liked it very much." Steve said. They were just waiting for the crowd to disperse so they can leave the cinema in peace. He didn't want Tasha to get overwhelmed by the crowd, especially since majority seemed to be Littles who were talking excitedly about the movie. Given how tired Tasha looked, it seemed that going with the crowd isn't a bright idea.

"How about we find a coffee shop after this?" Tony suggested. Tasha looked just about ready for a nap and he didn't think the toddler would take well to being separated from Steve in this state.

"That's a good idea." Steve nodded.

Tasha was yawning and rubbing her eyes every now and then, so Steve started to rhythmically pat her bum in the hopes that it'd soothe her. Once the crowds thinned, Steve nodded to Tony and the two of them stood, Steve with Tasha in his arms.

"Daddyyyy." Tasha whined when she got jostled, but Steve was quick to soothe.

"It's okay baby, daddy's got you." Steve cooed and held Tasha close as he and Tony walked out of the cinema. "Can you give daddy a big hug, hm?" He was trying to gently push her head down onto his shoulder, but Tasha was refusing.

"Noooo! No go! Again again again!" Tasha whined and basically struggled in Steve's arms as she was carried.

"We can watch it again at home, okay Tasha? We need to go now." Steve tried to calmly explain to his thrashing Little, but Tasha was having none of it.

The toddler just wanted to watch the movie again _here_ , but her daddy doesn't understand! She's also a very very sleepy toddler since it's way past her naptime, but she didn't know that. Steve and Tony however, could clearly tell. After Steve said they had to leave, Tasha just started to cry as she continued her attempts to squirm her way down Steve's arms.

"Baby we can't stay here." Steve sighed as he picked up the pace so they can go to a more secluded area: People were starting to look and Steve wasn't liking that. "I know you want to watch it again, so we can at home, okay? We'll watch it in the big bed with Nini."

"No no no!!! Ta-a-asha wan' hewe!" Tasha cried. By now her face was actually red from how hard she was crying, and Steve was starting to get worried. At this rate, Tasha was going to cry herself sick.

"We can invite bubby to watch it with us!" Steve said in an attempt to calm her down. "Maybe bubby and uncle Tony can watch it with us, hm?" He looked to Tony hopefully, and thankfully the latter nodded his head.

"Bubby!" And Tasha found something new to cry about. "Wan' bubby! Bu-u-ubby!"

"Looks like naps are a must for a certain toddler." Tony commented.

"You think?" Steve sighed as he started to sway with Tasha. "Bubby's at home, baby. We can go home and find bubby, but daddy needs you to stop crying first. We'll get to bubby, shh, it's okay."

"Bubby!" Tasha wasn't listening because she didn't know what she really wanted to happen. On one hand she wanted to stay here and watch the movie again on the big TV, but on the other she wanted to see her bubby.

"I'll call Clint." Tony decided, already taking out his phone and then looking for Clint's number. "Maybe just talking to him will help."

"Thanks, Tony." Steve said as he continued to sway with Tasha and coo to her, but nothing was working. Right about now Steve wanted to cry too.

"Agent Barton, you have an incoming call from Mr. Stark." FRIDAY announced in the gym where Clint, Wanda, Skye, and Lincoln were busy training. That caught Clint's attention because FRIDAY only ever did that if Tony needed something urgent.

"Isn't he on some date with Steve?" Wanda asked as she stepped back from where she was sparring with Skye so she can look at Clint. Skye tried to pull a fast one on her, but Wanda was quick and had far more training, so she was easily able to sidestep Daisy's attack.

Clint didn't respond to her though since by then he was already jogging back to where he put his bag down and quickly retrieved his phone. "Hello?"

"Clint." If Clint didn't know any better, Tony sounded relieved--and was that crying in the background? "Couldn't have picked up any sooner?"

"I'm training the team today, in case you've forgotten." Clint reminded Tony. "Is that Tasha crying?"

"Yes, and she's crying for you. You have a minute to talk to her? Nothing else is calming her down."

Of course Clint had time for his best friend. "Yeah of course. Put your phone on video." Clint directed just as he pulled his phone away from him to do the same.

"What're you doing? Are you video calling Nat?" Wanda, being as nosy as ever, left Skye for a moment because she wanted to know what was up. She, like practically everyone in the team, has been dying to see Nat ever since they heard the news. She also missed her big sister--who she supposed is technically her baby sister now? Wow this was going to give her a headache.

"Yes but she's Tasha right now, and I don't know if she'll be ready to see more people." Clint tried to explain gently, but he was silently hoping Wanda would get the hint. "Can you maybe--"

"Bubby!" Tasha's cry interrupted Clint, and the latter turned to look back at his phone screen. True enough, he can see Tasha now and it just made Clint want to reach in and hug her tight. She looked absolutely distressed: Big crocodile tears rolling down her cheeks, face all red from crying, and even a little snot dripping from her nose which Steve then reached out to wipe with a napkin.

"Hi Tasha. Why are you so sad?" Clint asked in the gentlest voice he could muster, but it didn't help. Tasha still whimpered and more tears ran down her cheeks.

"Wan' you." Tasha cried before she let out a cough. Yup, she's definitely been crying her eyes out and everything.

"Do you want me to visit you when you get home?" Clint asked, and that caught Wanda's attention.

Technically, they were all supposed to visit Nat tonight... If things went well with Tony which, quite frankly, seems like it's going disastrous. From where she was standing she could clearly see how upset Nat, or rather, Tasha looked. It felt so odd to see Natasha dropped, even though it was just through video. Heck, it felt so weird to hear Natasha as Tasha _._ Wanda's aware Littles sound different when they're dropped, but it still shocked her because Nat just sounded so _tiny_. Actually, looking at her in Steve's arms right now, Natasha _looked_ tiny.

'U-uhhuh." Tasha pitifully nodded her head. "Bubby a-an' Tasha p'ay an' wa-atch nanas."

Clint had no idea what Tasha meant by watching nanas, but he nodded his head anyway. "That sounds like a lot of fun." He smiled at Tasha. "I can't wait for you guys to get home."

"Sissy?" Tasha sniffled and then coughed through her tears. Clint was confused for a moment, and then it clicked. His head snapped back to where Wanda last was, and true enough she was in Tasha's line of sight. That got a reaction out of Wanda that he wasn't expecting: The girl just looked like a deer caught in headlights. She didn't know what to do! She thought the camera wouldn't catch her from where she was standing, but it apparently did.

"Hi, Tasha." Wanda said in an uncertain tone. She was hoping that her presence wouldn't upset Tasha further because if it did, Wanda probably wouldn't forgive herself.

"Hi sissy." Tasha said in the same sad voice. "Si-issy an' bubby p'ay wif baby?"

"Yeah, bubby and sissy can play when you get home." Clint promised Tasha with a soft smile. "Is baby Tasha still sad?" Clint asked, and Tasha shook her head even though a few more tears left her eyes.

"No mow sad." Tasha told Clint as she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hands. "Baby s'eepy, bubby." Ah, so that's why Tasha's upset.

"Oh no, then baby Tasha should probably close her eyes first!" Clint said. "You need aaaall the energy for when we play later, right Wanda?"

"Yeah Tasha! We're going to play lots and lots of games so you better rest. I'm sure your daddy will give you looots of hugs while you go night night first." Wanda said as she stepped closer so Tasha could see both her and Clint better this time.

"O-otay." Tasha said in a small voice as she tiredly rubbed her right eye with a loose fist. "Nigh' nigh' bubby. Nigh' nigh' sissy."

"Night night Tasha." Clint and Wanda said almost simultaneously.

"Can you give them a big kiss, baby?" The pair heard Steve ask, and Tasha nodded her head before putting a hand to her mouth and blowing them a kiss. That definitely got both Wanda and Clint to smile widely, and the two of them returned the kiss as well. They waved goodbye to Tasha one more time, before Tony finally ended the call.

"I'm _sissy!_ " Wanda practically cheered before Clint could even put his phone away. "Did you hear that, Clint? You're not her only big sibling around now." She teased.

"Well technically, Tasha has five older brothers and sisters." Clint pointed out as he eyed Skye and Lincoln who by then were watching the two of them. Bobbi was supposed to join their "Little training", but had an urgent matter to attend to so it was just the four of them. "And hey, I was here first. You can't top that." He shrugged.

"Are we still training?" Skye asked. She and Lincoln stopped when Wanda and Clint left, seeing as they were curious about what pulled their partners away from them. They'd also heard the news already about Nat, and this just made Lincoln want to see her now even more.

Skye probably couldn't say the same.

"That just means she'll get bored of you sooner." Wanda teased again. She knew that wasn't the case but she didn't really care, she was just so happy that Tasha seemed to accept her already even if it was just through a video call. Her excitement was basically dulling her other senses and she didn't even register what Skye asked.

"You never got bored of me." Clint smirked, and Wanda had to roll her eyes at that one.

"I have no choice but to tolerate you." Wanda corrected him, earning her a light hit on the arm from Clint. "All jokes aside though, I really hope Nat agrees to dinner later. Apart from seeing her, it's going to be the first time in forever we're complete."

"Yeah, it'll be good for everyone." Clint nodded. "I seriously can't wait for you all to meet Tasha. I swear she's the sweetest toddler you'll ever meet: Definitely great baby sister material." Clint chuckled.

"Hey Skye! You hear that? You're finally going to be a big sister." Wanda grinned at Skye. Personally, Wanda quite enjoyed being a big sister to Skye, so she was quite thrilled to get a _baby_ sister this time. Hopefully, Skye would share the same excitement as her.

"Oh I just can't wait to see Nat! This is all so exciting, I can't believe..." Wanda was rambling on and on excitedly, that both she and Clint managed to miss how Skye didn't respond to Wanda's comment.

Skye was happy for Nat: She really was. But she couldn't ignore the sudden knots in her stomach. She has a baby sister now.

"There we go, that's better." Steve cooed and rubbed Tasha's back as the Little finally stopped crying. It'd been heart-wrenching to watch and listen to.

"S'eepy baby." Tasha said softly as she rested her head on Steve's shoulder.

"Why don't we look for a cafe we can rest in?" Tony suggested. He'd grabbed a napkin from the bag and proceeded to gently wipe Tasha's face clean. The fact that Tasha didn't argue about it showed that she really is tired.

Steve pondered Tony's suggestion and decided that'd probably be the best they can do right now. In the state that Tasha's in, it'd be impossible for Steve to set her down in her car seat. His toddler's tight hold on him only reinforced that feeling, so Steve nodded in agreement.

Eventually, they found a cozy enough looking shop without much people inside. Still, they opted to get a booth near the back to avoid attracting any attention to themselves. Both Bigs silently agreed that would be a tragedy considering the state that Tasha was in. Currently, the toddler had her eyes half closed as she tiredly sucked on her thumb. Steve was doing his best to help her fall asleep, but the Little girl's eyes just wouldn't close.

"Tony, can you maybe help me make her bottle please?" Steve requested softly as he fixed the way he was holding Tasha so she'd be cradled in his arms. "Shh, it's okay baby. I'm sorry, I know you're tired." Steve said in a soothing voice when Tasha whined upon getting jostled.

"Baba." Tasha whimpered, her thumb still planted in her mouth.

"Uncle Tony's making your baba now, see?" Steve soothed. True enough, Tony was already pouring in the powdered formula into the bottle after filling it with water.

"Almost there munchkin." Tony said as he capped the bottle and started to give it a shake.

Tasha looked just about ready to cry and Tony was _not_ having that, so he started doing a silly dance as he shook Tasha's bottle. He thanked the gods that the cafe was practically empty because he knew he looked ridiculous right now. But hey, it got Tasha's lips to stop wobbling and the toddler was just looking at Tony curiously.

"Alright, there we go." Tony uncapped the bottle and handed it over to Steve.

"Thanks, Tony." Steve smiled, and Tony knew he wasn't being thanked just for the bottle. In response, Tony just nodded his head and let Steve feed Tasha her bottle.

At some point, Tasha put her hand over Steve's as she was fed the bottle, but Steve still held it for his Little. Steve looked down at his Little and smiled as if he was holding the world in his arms: He might as well be. The way Steve looked at Tasha with so much love in his eyes made Tony incredibly happy for his friends. They both deserved each other's love. When Steve leaned down to give Tasha a kiss on the forehead, Tony felt like he was invading into a private moment so he took his phone out first to distract himself.

"Daddy loves you, Tasha." When Steve spoke softly again, Tony looked up and saw that the Little had just fallen asleep in Steve's arms. Asleep, Tasha looked even more precious than ever. She was still even drinking from her bottle in her sleep, which Tony found quite adorable too.

"Obviously, naptimes for your little munchkin fall after lunch." Tony pointed out quietly with a soft chuckle.

"Yeah. I guess her routine just takes some getting used to." Steve said sheepishly as he tried to carefully pull the empty bottle away from Tasha's mouth. The toddler whined in her sleep, but Steve was quick to slide Tasha's soother in between her lips. "Thanks for helping, Tony." He said with a grateful smile.

"Oh don't worry about it." Tony brushed it off. "May I remind you that you want Natasha to get reacquainted with the team so she can be part of all the loving? Not so we can just watch her be cute and all--although that is a great plus. We're here to help, just like how you've always been there."

"Still, thank you." Steve repeated. This time, Tony accepted the gratitude.

They considered going home once Tasha fell asleep, they really did. But one conversation led to another, and the two men just got wrapped up in each other's company. Tasha was still lying comfortably in Steve's arms so they had to be quiet, but even Steve couldn't help the occasional chuckle as the two of them talked. Sometimes Tasha would stir in her sleep, but Steve would just soothingly pat the side of her bum and back off she was to dream land.

He wasn't quite sure if he loved Tony just yet, but he had a feeling he was getting there. Talking with Tony just came so easy now. Sure, the man had his quirks: But didn't everyone? 

About an hour after they arrived at the cafe, Tasha started to stir once more in Steve's arms. The two Bigs stopped their conversation first as Steve tried to soothe the Little back to sleep, but it wasn't working anymore. Tasha continued to shift in Steve's arms for a few more moments until she finally opened her eyes and looked up tiredly at Steve.

"Hi baby." Steve cooed, assuming he still had Tasha right now. "You ready to be awake now?"

"Steve?" Nat asked as she blinked up at him. If Steve didn't know any better, he'd say she looked confused and... In pain?

"Mhm, it's me. We're here in a cafe with Tony." Steve explained as he used his free hand to brush some stray hairs from Nat's face. "How are you feeling?" He couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong with Natasha.

Usually, Nat easily hid her pain. Most of them wouldn't even know she needed medical attention until she didn't _actually_ need it anymore. Right now though, Steve could read her expression like an open book. It was comforting yet at the same time concerning.

"I... I don't know." Nat frowned and Steve carefully helped her sit up on his lap when he saw her trying. He had her straddling his lap so she'd be facing him. "Um, my head kind of feels weird." She said softly with her eyebrows furrowed together.

"Weird how? Like you have a headache?"

"No? I don't know... I guess?" Nat frowned. She couldn't explain how it actually felt. It was as if her head got hit by a truck but at the same time, it felt numb. She didn't even know how that was possible. Of course apart from the pain, the first thing that came to mind was that she's going to die.

All those pills are finally catching up to her, and this is what she gets. She's going to die right when she and Steve are trying to get her on the mend. Typical Natasha luck, right? She took a deep, shaky breath and moved to hide her face in Steve's chest. For his part, Steve held his Little close and soothingly rubbed her back.

"Baby how bad is it?" Steve asked softly. "And does anything else hurt?"

"Just my head." Natasha mumbled. She squirmed slightly as she thought about her answer to Steve's first question. Nat'd woken up needing to pee, but that and her soaked diaper weren't registering with her yet. She was just so focused on her throbbing head at the moment. "Maybe a seven?"

So it's bad. Anything above five on the pain scale for Nat usually meant _"in excruciating pain, I'm going to die"_ for other people.

"I can have FRIDAY do a quick scan on her." Tony said as he pulled out his phone, and Steve looked at him gratefully. He didn't know what's wrong with his Little, and quite frankly he's greatly concerned. After everything Bruce told them about Nat's state, the worry was expected.

On top of that, Natasha kept squirming so Steve thought she was getting restless or antsy about her head. It wasn't until he noticed Natasha's hands going down to hold herself did he finally understand what all the squirming was about. The Little hadn't even realized she was doing it, but both Steve and Tony noticed. Neither said anything though and Tony just proceeded to do a quick check of Nat.

Steve didn't think Nat needing to go would be a big deal: Worst thing that could happen would be that she'd have an accident, right? She's wearing a diaper anyway so it'll be fine, unless...

As Tony did some quick scans on Natasha, Steve subtly lifted the back of Nat's skirt and checked her diaper. Yeah it's not going to be able to hold another accident with how soaked it already was. Based on how badly Natasha was squirming, Steve didn't think they had much time to wait. Luckily, Tony's scan didn't take too long.

"I'll send this over to Bruce so he can give us more accurate interpretations." Tony said as he typed away on his tablet.

"Thank you Tony." Steve said before looking down at his Little. "Come on baby, let's go for a walk while we wait for Bruce to get back, hm?" Steve didn't want to outright say he's taking Nat to the bathroom so as not to embarrass her (even though he was fairly certain Tony already knew anyway).

"Okay." Natasha said in a soft, small voice as Steve stood up with her still in his arms, the backpack slung over his shoulder too just in case. She had her head on Steve's shoulder and both her hands still between them, holding herself tightly.

"We're almost there, you can do it." Steve said soothingly. He didn't bother to pretend not knowing anymore since it was just him and Natasha anyway.

The moment Steve said that, Natasha _finally_ noticed the predicament she was in. She blushed a bright red and hid her face in Steve's shoulder. "Sorry."

"It's okay, nothing you need to apologize for." Once they reached the cafe's restroom, Steve was on autopilot and quickly went inside with Natasha. He walked over to the toilet and easily ripped off Nat's diaper before sitting her down just in time.

"I'm sorry." Nat's voice was muffled because she was leaning forward, her elbows on her knees and face in her hands as she used the toilet.

"Nothing to be sorry for." Steve said soothingly before stepping back to give Natasha some semblance privacy.

Natasha couldn't believe she almost had an accident: She wasn't even dropped for crying out loud!

"Don't be too hard on yourself." It was as if Steve could read her mind. "You woke up in a pretty bad state, and you were dropped before that too. It must have been pretty disorienting."

Instead of replying verbally, Nat just took a deep, shaky breath and nodded her head. The moment she did though, she regretted it. Even with her eyes closed, it felt as if the world spinning. She knew she was also done with the toilet, but she couldn't bring herself to sit up and do anything about it. Any movement just might make everything worse.

Steve, sensing that Nat really was out of sorts, approached her to help. "I'm going to help you clean up, okay baby?" Steve spoke soothingly. "It's just me, nothing to be embarrassed about right?"

At this point, Nat just really wanted off the toilet and back in Steve's arms. The pain wasn't as bad when she was in Steve's arms and she only guessed it had something to do with their Heartmate connection. "Yeah okay." She said in a really soft voice.

It was loud and clear enough for Steve though, so he bent down and carefully lifted Natasha up into his arms. "I'm going to put you in another diaper, okay? It's just in case you feel like dropping."

"Can't control it yet." Nat mumbled as she hid her face again in Steve's shoulder. Honestly she'd drop right now if she could if it'd help with the pain: It was _that_ bad.

"I know, and that's okay. We'll eventually get the hang of it." Steve said. When he moved to lay Natasha down on top of the changing table, the Little whimpered and Steve almost picked her right back up. But he needed to get Nat clean because getting a rash on top of all this would just be adding insult to injury.

"I'll pick you right back up, okay? We just need to get you cleaned and dressed." Steve soothed.

Nat knew that of course, but she was just in _so much_ pain. Yes, she's been held captive and gotten tortured plenty of times during their missions: But for some reason this felt worse. Whenever Steve sets her down, it feels like her mind's slowly eating itself away.

"You'll be okay, Nat. Tony messaged Bruce and by the time we get back to him we'll probably already know what to do." Steve tried to reassure his Little, but it also felt like he was trying to reassure himself. He could feel Natasha's distress, as in _physically_ feel it himself. He heard of this happening to Heartmates sometimes. It's a rare occurrence, but when it does happen you can be certain that your Heartmate needs immediate attention.

With that in mind, Steve tried to be as quick but as gentle as possible as he cleaned Natasha up and got her redressed. It took a bit longer than either of them hoped, but eventually Nat was back in Steve's arms. The moment she was, Steve could feel the pain from their connection slowly dwindle into a dull ache. It was still there, but it wasn't as bad as before.

The same could be said for Natasha: She was still in excruciating pain, but undoubtedly being in Steve's arms made it a little better. Now that her arms were free, she wrapped them around Steve. The moment Nat's head hit Steve's shoulder, she closed her eyes and tried to take deep, even breaths. She barely even noticed Steve move about as he washed his hands, pack everything back into the bag, and finally leave the bathroom.

"Hey, did Bruce get back to you yet?" Steve asked immediately upon getting back to Tony.

"He says it's connected to her drops." The look of concern on Tony's face did not bode well for Steve at all. "It's something he anticipated, and he apologizes for not letting you in on it earlier. He jut hoped that he was wrong about--."

"He shouldn't have kept anything from me." Steve said a bit tersely. This is the health of his Little for crying out loud! He should know everything there is to know about her. Why would Bruce even _consider_ not telling him all the details?

"Okay, Steve I know you're upset but getting angry right now isn't going to help." Tony said in an attempt to get Steve to calm down. "I'm not going to defend Bruce, but he says there's an easy remedy to what Nat's experiencing. Wanda had the same episodes when she first joined us, remember?"

Now that Tony brought it up, yes, Steve remembered. When Wanda first joined their team, everyone knew she's a Little. It was painfully obvious: Wanda looked so young and innocent even outside her Littlespace. That's why everyone was quite confused as to why they never see Wanda dropped. Everyone eventually just assumed that she was dropping in the privacy of her own room.

It wasn't until the girl collapsed in the middle of their training, leading to her being brought to he medbay, did they learn that Wanda hasn't dropped since she joined them. It had been three months. Before that, the longest Steve's known a Little to go without any drops is only a month: And that's already pushing it.

"Bruce sent me the prescription, he says we can get it in any pharmacy." Tony spoke when Steve didn't seem like he'd be responding to the question. "I already searched, and this mall has one. It's just by the supermarket."

"I should be the one who has it together." Steve frowned.

"Should I be offended?" Tony asked, but he had an amused smile on his face. He decided to finally stand up too so they can leave and buy Natasha's medicine.

"She's my Little. I should be on top of things." Steve couldn't help but feel like he'd be so lost if he was on his own right now.

"Steve, you're on top of it." Tony shook his head before he nodded towards the exit, suggesting they can walk while talking. "You saw that she needed immediate help with something, and you took care of that first. You would've checked in with Bruce too, I just helped speed up the process while you took care of Nat. Don't beat yourself up for taking care of her."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be." Tony said. They were now walking to the pharmacy as quickly as they could without jostling Natasha too much. The Little was sitting still in Steve's arms and it concerned both Bigs. "Gods, Rogers. You ever heard of a swear jar? You should have an _unnecessary apologies_ jar. I might make a bigger income from that than from SI."

"So--" Steve was about to apologize again, but he caught himself.

"You do apologize too much." It was Natasha who spoke this time. Her voice was still soft and sounded tired, but Steve was still happy to hear her talk.

"Yeah maybe that's something we can both work on." Steve said as he started to soothingly rub Natasha's back.

In the back of her mind, Natasha knew she should probably walk on her own. She wasn't dropped and she's fully capable of using her own legs. Plus, Tony was right there. Maybe if they were alone this'd be okay, but they're with Tony, and were in _public_ at that. But still, Nat couldn't make the words leave her mouth.

"You two should look up to me. I mean look: I _barely_ apologize for all the shit I've done." Tony joked, and Steve had to roll his eyes at that one. If Nat's eyes were open, she probably would too.

A couple of minutes later, they finally found the pharmacy. It was pretty small making it seem crowded inside with a bunch of people going about to do their own shopping.

"I can go inside and get the medicine. You just stay here with Nat." Tony instantly volunteered knowing that going into the crowd probably won't do Natasha any good. "And before you can say anything, it's okay. I can see you wanting to tell me that you can do it. I know you can, but I just want to help."

Before Steve could argue or even give Tony his wallet, the latter already turned and walked inside.

"How's your head?" Steve asked softly after a few moments of just gently swaying with Nat.

"It's not as bad as earlier." Nat admitted, and Steve was grateful to hear that. "You can put me down if you want to."

"I know, but like Tony said: I just want to help." Steve said before kissing the top of Nat's head.

"You think it's anything serious?" Steve could hear the worry in Nat's voice and he didn't like it. He just wanted to shield Nat from any pain or worries.

"If Bruce is making us get medicine from the pharmacy instead of making his own medicine in the lab, then I think it's not too bad." Steve said after thinking about it for a while. The medicine being available at pharmacies meant this happened frequently enough for it to be even made readily available to the public, right?

"You don't sound convinced." Nat deadpanned.

"Still as perceptive as ever." Steve chuckled softly. "We'll give you your medicine, and if, _if_ it doesn't work, then I'll take you straight to Bruce, okay? We'll figure it out together."

Together. Yeah, Natasha liked the sound of that. Even with the Avengers around, there were still times she felt alone. Beyond the team, everyone just had their own personal lives that Nat didn't really want to force herself into. Everyone had Heartmates, or was an uncle, aunt, nephew, or niece. She was just Nat. Now _she_ had someone. She still had a lot of reservations about everything, a lot of them rooted in self-doubts, but healthy Nat can deal with that. Right now, she figured she can get away with being a little clingy because of her situation.

The immense pain she felt earlier served like a slap in the face. For a few seconds she sincerely thought that it was the end for her, that all her stubbornness finally caught up. Maybe it was karma for all the terrible things she's done in the past: Who knows? Not Nat. What Nat knows however, is that that scared her a lot more than she thought it would. It scared her more than the uncertainties brought by meeting the team again as her new self.

Natasha prides herself as a dignified woman, which is partly why she's so hesitant to meet everyone again in the first place. She's the youngest Little in the team, the youngest Little in _SHIELD_ for that matter. It's not really something to be proud of: Not just the age, but everything that came with it. The other Littles she knew had some form of independence even when dropped, but she didn't. Other Littles didn't need their Bigs as much when they're aged, but she did.

Natasha prides herself a dignified woman, but also a smart one. These past few minutes have been a big wakeup call for her. If she didn't take care of herself, especially her mind, then her pride wouldn't mean shit. Keeping up with her stubborn ways won't be of any benefit to her or anyone around her, especially Steve.

One of the many things she's learned over the past years: You need to do what you can to survive. If that meant truly being more open about her drops, then so be it. This didn't mean she had to like it though.

"I think I want to do team dinner tonight." Nat surprised even herself when she said that, but she didn't take it back. _You need to do this, Nat._

If Steve was shocked, he didn't show it. You couldn't hear it in his voice either. What Natasha could sense was a smile as Steve talked. "That makes me really happy to hear." He said softly before kissing the top of Nat's head again.

Nat loved it whenever Steve did that: But of course she wasn't going to admit it.

"I'll call Clint when we get home, and I'm sure he'll be happy to let everyone else know." Steve said.

"How are we going to fit at home though?" If it was true that everyone's stopping by, Nat wasn't sure how they'd all fit in the apartment. Sure, Steve's apartment's big, but with everyone there it's going to feel cramped. Nat didn't do well with cramped.

"We'll have dinner in the common floor. I've already thought this through baby, you don't need to worry about it." There was so much reassurance in Steve's words that Natasha easily believed him. Tonight isn't going to be so bad. "I'm proud of you for making this decision."

Just then, Tony rejoined them with the medicine in his hands. "I got it. It's for toddler Littles specifically though, so I'm afraid it's syrup." He said almost apologetically.

"Thanks, Tony. How much do I owe you for it?"

"Maybe another date?" Tony dared to ask, and Steve blushed but he was smiling too.

"That can be arranged." He said with a soft smile which Tony returned.

"Alright, let's get this into Nat's system then." Tony said as he opened the box and took out the bottle.

"Nat? Can you sit up for me for a moment please? We need to give you your medicine." Steve gently prodded Natasha as Tony measured the right amount of medicine with the dropper.

Honestly, Natasha's head was feeling slightly better. It was still throbbing, but at least it didn't feel like her head got hit by a truck. She largely suspected it had something to do with being so close to Steve. Still, she didn't want to risk it worsening so she nodded her head and sat up in Steve's arms. Sitting up, she felt completely exposed but just one reassuring squeeze from Steve and she stopped overthinking it.

"Here you go." Tony said as he handed the dropper to Steve, who took it with his free hand.

"Open up baby." Steve said gently as he moved the dropper to Nat's mouth. The latter sighed but she reluctantly opened her mouth, wincing slightly at the taste as Steve squeezed. "I'm sorry, I imagine that doesn't taste the best." Steve said with a soft chuckle, but he kissed the side of Nat's head to make up for it.

"She needs to take a dose every four hours for the next day." Tony said as Steve handed him back the dropper. That made Natasha groan as she rested her head back down on Steve's shoulder.

"I'll make sure to set an alarm." Steve said with a nod as he soothingly patted Nat's bum.

When Steve did that, Natasha was suddenly reminded that she still had a diaper on, and that she was still in Steve's arms. Both probably unnecessary at this point, especially since she already had the medicine.

"I can walk, Steve. You don't have to carry me." Nat said softly as she sat back up in his arms. "I'm not dropped, and I don't really feel close to dropping anymore."

"Well I can take care of you both when you're dropped and when you're aged." Steve said. "And maybe holding you right now makes me feel a little better too." He said in a softer voice and with a sheepish smile.

"Yeah just enjoy the free ride." Tony said with a playful wink.

Natasha dared to look at Tony and was surprised that he didn't look judgmental of her predicament at all. She waited for him to tease her about it, but no teasing came. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Primarily fluff again oops
> 
> Personally I'm looking forward to writing the next 2 chapters so I wanted to get this one out already too hehe


	16. Chapter 16

The Avengers common floor sat at the penthouse of one of the residential buildings meant for agents who've just come from the academy. Originally the area was meant to be a gym for the residents of the building, but that didn't go as planned. After an entire day of getting their asses whipped at different training sessions by senior agents, the last thing trainees wanted was another gym. It didn't take long for the Avengers to convince Fury to allow them to transform the space for their use instead (especially considering the gym was literally gathering cobwebs).

Now, instead of gym equipment, the penthouse held a plethora of furniture that made it one of the homiest spaces in the compound. At the center of it all was large living room with the area near the TV sunken into the floor a bit with a carpeted finish to give it a cozier vibe. A grand piano stood to the side and yes, some of them like to play it now and then.

Beyond that, there was a large area sectioned off for the Littles' toys. Most of them were Daisy's or Wanda's, but the older three had their fair share there too. The three eldest were often found playing on their gadgets, but the Bigs frown upon too much screen time so they still get the occasional play. The Bigs swore though that the older three just pretended they were being "forced" to play in the play area though. They've caught their eldest ones playing there without Daisy and Wanda more times than they can count. Heck, some of the Bigs would join in on the fun sometimes too. Who wouldn't with a large race track for RC cars, or a complete kitchen playset?

What made the play area more interesting was the wall: No, it wasn't concrete, wood, or a window. The wall's an aquarium--or at least a sizeable part of it is. That came in when the original five Littles wouldn't stop begging for pets. When they first saw the fish, the Littles were disappointed and claimed that fish are boring! But not even an hour passed after that and all five grew to love it.

Of course there were also sources of entertainment for the Avengers as adults. The common floor had a foosball table, pool table, and a "mini" bar among others. They also had the essentials of course: A complete kitchen with a fully-stocked pantry, and a huge dining room that fit all of them on the rare occasions that everyone was over. Plenty of bathrooms were installed too.

As big as the penthouse was though, there weren't any bedrooms at all. It had been a team decision to do without. Having bedrooms would encourage them to go to their own individual worlds: It was contradicting to why they have a common floor in the first place. When the Avengers use the common floor, it's when they want to be together. That's why the penthouse was such an open area. They could all be doing their own thing, but it still felt like they were still in the same room as everyone.

That was the small comfort that Nat kept in the back of her mind as she lounged in the living room with Clint: Part of her was getting anxious because she wanted to be near Steve, but she reminded herself that he's just there. Steve and Tony were both in the kitchen working on dinner, and they insisted that Nat should just rest. After what happened earlier, Steve wanted Nat to take it easy until they were sure she's completely stable. Steve of course didn't just leave his Little alone. He kept her company until Clint arrived earlier, which Natasha was thankful for.

"How'd your movie date go?" Clint asked Natasha, who was currently lying down on the couch with her head on Clint's lap.

The TV was on with some random show that neither of them were really paying attention to. Clint had his full attention on Natasha, while the latter was busy trying to ease her own nerves about being separated from Steve. The way Clint was playing with her hair did help a little though.

"It was fine, I guess. Tasha enjoyed the movie." Natasha said. There wasn't really much to say about it, except probably that it went way better than she expected it to (apart from her being in excruciating pain at the end, that is). At least she and Tony seemed to be okay with each other.

"I take it went well enough since you said yes to team dinner tonight." Clint said, and Natasha could almost hear the smile in his voice. "At least now I know it wasn't Tony who made you cry earlier."

"Oh shut up." Natasha rolled her eyes and Clint chuckled. "He was actually quite sweet today... I can't believe I'm saying this about Tony."

"Tony can be sweet too. He's got a pretty big soft spot for Littles." Clint said as he continued to play with Nat's hair. "How are you feeling? About the dinner."

"Honestly still a bit uncertain... But I've got to do it, right?" Plus, everyone was already told that dinner would be pushing through. Natasha didn't want to flake and be a source of disappointment for them all. But what if they just felt obligated to come, and would be relieved about a cancellation?

"Not if you don't feel comfortable about it yet." Clint said with a shake of his head.

"That's the thing though: I don't really think I'll ever get comfortable." Nat frowned. The longer she delayed it, the more she prolongs her agony. It only gave her more time to overthink. At least this way, if the team won't like her or things don't work out, it'd be like she ripped the band aid right off. But is it selfish of her to think this way? Maybe it was.

"Alright, well I support your decision because I support you." Clint said. "I know you know this already, but if you get overwhelmed later don't feel like you're obligated to see it all through, okay? You can step out if you need to: Just come to me or Steve."

"I know." Natasha nodded her head. "Steve kept telling me that on the way back here. It's as if doesn't actually want to do the dinner."

"You know he's just being protective."

"Again, I know. I was just joking." Natasha rolled her eyes. Sometimes she thought that the protectiveness was ridiculous, but other times she loved it. It made her feel safe.

"Oh! Before I forget... I got you something." Clint stopped playing with Natasha's hair for a moment as he reached for something behind the couch. That got Natasha curious and she turned so she'd be lying on her back and looking up at Clint instead of the TV.

"What's the occasion?" Natasha asked curiously.

"It's nothing big, don't worry." Clint chuckled.

He then procured a purple blanket with black polka dots and showed it to Natasha. Upon closer inspection though, Nat noticed that they weren't just polka dots. They were little cartoon spiders.

"Really? A blanket?" Nat asked in an amused tone as she sat up and accepted the blanket from Clint. It definitely felt soft and fuzzy in her hands, and she had a feeling it'd be cozy to snuggle in too--did she really just think about _snuggling_ right now?

"I wanted to get you something you could use both as Nat and Tasha." Clint said almost bashfully. "I know it's silly, but since you're always cold, I-"

"No, no it's perfect." Natasha smiled. "You didn't have to get me anything, but I still appreciate it. Thank you, Clint." She said before leaning up to give him a kiss on the cheek. Nat was rarely openly affectionate with anyone, but Clint's always the exception. Having been the first person to ever make her feel safe, he earned that.

"No need to thank me." Clint smiled at Nat. "Come here." He reached for the blanket and unfolded it before wrapping it around Natasha's shoulders. It really was a bit cold for Natasha, so she was thankful for the additional warmth and even held it tighter around herself. Clint gently tugged her into his side so yup, extra cozy. She even stopped worrying about not being with Steve right now.

As their show played on, more and more of their team joined them in the penthouse. Now they were just waiting for Wanda, Thor, and Maria.

Most of them stayed in the living room with Natasha and Clint, but some of the Bigs moved to the kitchen to help out with dinner after they've greeted Natasha. Even with the team already there, Natasha stayed right in her spot cuddled up to Clint with the blanket still tight around her. She initially wanted to pull away, but Clint's reassuring smile and gentle squeeze told her that this was okay.

"Agent Romanoff--" Jemma began to speak, but she stopped short when Natasha shook her head.

"We're off duty, and I'm cuddled up to Clint with a blanket around me." Natasha pointed out with a hint of amusement in her tone. "You can cut the formalities, Jemma. It's Nat." She supposed it's her fault though that the rest of the team's still formal around her even outside work. She's pretty cozy with the Avengers, but Coulson's team not so much. Rarely did Natasha join them, and on the occasions she did she usually glued herself to Clint.

"Apologies. I just wanted to know how you've been." Jemma said with a small smile. "I was hoping to ask you something, if it's alright."

"Um, yeah I guess." Natasha shrugged and tried to play it off cool. In truth though she was slightly nervous. She anticipated that the team would ask her questions, and quite honestly she still wasn't sure about how to answer them.

"I'm terribly curious, but you don't have to answer if it's not something you're comfortable answering." Yeah Nat wasn't liking the sound of this already. Given that this is Jemma speaking, it was probably going to be something scientific. The others had their attention on her and Jemma now too, but Natasha tried to ignore them.

"What was it like when you and Steve bonded?" Natasha was not expecting that.

She anticipated questions that would stress her out: Is she conscious during her drops? If she's not, then how does she tell herself when to age back up? Can she remember everything once she's aged? Just thinking about those among many others brought Natasha some unease, so Jemma's question is a happy surprise. It actually brought a smile to Natasha's face.

"I don't know how to explain it, really... But I guess it felt light? A lot's been weighing down on me for a while, but when Steve and I bonded, it felt as though all that was lifted off even just for a while." Natasha admitted before she realized that maybe she was being too open. She could have just said that it felt great, and that would've covered it.

"So a typical bond, then." Skye said without even looking up from her phone. It was almost like there was a slight edge to her tone, but Nat couldn't tell for sure. Maybe she was just imagining it.

"I think that's sweet." Jemma smiled at Natasha.

"Yeah I'm genuinely happy for you, Nat." It was Bobbi who spoke this time. "Gods know you deserve it. Plus, I think I speak for everyone when I say we're excited to finally have a baby sister around." She smiled and winked at Nat. Of everyone outside the Avengers, Bobbi was probably the one Natasha's closest to. "Closest" is still relative but she, Bobbi, and Clint did spend a fair amount of time together before the Avengers formed.

"Think of all the trouble we can get away with now that we have Nat with us." Clint chuckled, but that earned him a disapproving look from Phil.

"Please don't corrupt her. You five already cause enough trouble as it is." Phil said.

"Don't worry, I can't be corrupted." Natasha chuckled.

"Mmm I don't know, Nat. We can be pretty influential. Remember the pineapple incident?" Bobbi smirked at Skye, who sighed and rolled her eyes. Yes, the older Littles were notorious for getting the younger ones in trouble. It gave everyone headaches because the Littles were so good at scheming even when dropped.

"I still don't forgive you for that." Skye glanced up at Bobbi. "And come on, Nat's a toddler. How do you plan on doing stuff like that with her?"

Now Skye's got a point. They couldn't very well count on Tasha to perform elaborate schemes: So how were they expecting to get away with trouble now that they have her? Unless...

"Oh don't tell me you plan on using me as a scapegoat." Nat turned to Clint with a mildly offended look on her face.

To his credit, Clint tried to look a little guilty. Tried. It was a sorry excuse for an attempt if you ask Nat. �"You're the one putting the words in my mouth." He had the audacity to grin at Natasha. "And come on, you're the one who'll get off the easiest. You probably won't even be punished for anything."

"I'm right here." Phil said. "You really don't think I'm not going to remember this all the next time you lot create chaos?"

"They're scheming, Coulson. We're practically invisible." Natasha heard Fitz say. She almost laughed at how exasperated Fitz looked right now. She couldn't blame him, though. Fitz and Jemma were the Littles' favorite targets after Coulson.

"Being a toddler's pretty much like having a built-in free pass to trouble. Anything you do's bound to be cute so they can't stay mad." Bobbi pointed out, and now even Lincoln was nodding in agreement. Initially, Natasha thought they were seriously planning to use her as a scapegoat, but then she really looked at them.

Lincoln, Bobbi, and Clint all had the smallest of smiles on their faces. If Natasha could read them right, and usually she could, then it looked like they were all just trying to get a reaction out of her. Why they were doing that though, she didn't know.

"I can't believe you: Using your own best friend as a scapegoat." Natasha played along and looked at Clint. "Bobbi I could believe--"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Bobbi interrupted, but her mock offense fell upon deaf ears.

"--but you? As my best friend aren't you always supposed to have my back or something?"

"I do, but... That also means you should have my back, remember?" Clint smirked.

"Guilt tripping. This is a whole new low even for you." Nat smiled and rolled her eyes before reaching for a throw pillow and hitting Clint with it across his chest. If Bobbi's and Clint's intention was to try to get Nat to loosen up, then okay it may have worked even just a little.

"Nat," all heads suddenly turned to face the kitchen, and Nat saw Steve standing by the doorway, "can you come here for a moment?"

"Oooh someone's in trouble for hitting." Skye teased.

Logically, Natasha knew that wasn't the case because (1) Steve probably didn't even see that, (2) it was barely a hit: If Clint got hurt he should be ashamed, and (3) she's out of her Littlespace. Steve won't punish her out of her Littlespace, right? Still, Natasha felt like there was a sudden pit in her stomach.

"Yeah sure." Natasha nodded her head and scooted away from Clint. She debated taking the blanket with her, but eventually decided on just leaving it on the couch with Clint. She didn't need comfort items 24/7. She probably shouldn't even need them when aged, right? Again Nat felt everyone's eyes on her, so she was thankful when Clint spoke and got all the attention off of her.

"What's up?" Natasha asked once she reached Steve at the doorway to the kitchen.

"It's time for your medicine." Steve said with an apologetic smile. Yeah, Nat would have preferred getting in trouble.

"Oh. Well, I'm okay, really. No need for another dose." Natasha moved to step back, but Steve was quick to take her hand and stop her. The medicine really was one of the worst things Natasha's ever tasted. And Nat's had to eat a lot of weird shit for missions.

"Sorry, Nat. You really need to complete your dose. What if I mix it in with some warm milk?" Steve suggested.

"Can't it be coffee or soda or something?" Nat sighed. She wasn't really much of a milk person: She even drank her coffee black for that matter.

"You can't take it with caffeine, I'm afraid." Of course she couldn't. "And I was thinking maybe the warm milk would help you drop, if you wanted to." Right, they're doing this whole team dinner thing to show Nat that it's okay to be herself. She's come to accept that all this is unavoidable, but it didn't mean that she liked it. It didn't mean she wasn't nervous about how it'd affect everything.

"I'm not so sure about dropping." Nat said softly. "And none of them are dropped anyway." In a group this big, Nat didn't know how she felt about being the only one dropped. Just the thought of having so much attention on her was already overwhelming: What more with the real thing?

"Maria called a few minutes ago, actually. Wanda's dropped out of excitement." Steve chuckled. "So I'm pretty sure the others will follow when they see Wanda. They'll want to drop too when they see you dropped." Steve pointed out as he brushed some hair behind Nat's ear.

"I don't know..." Even though she said yes to this dinner, Nat's still a bit nervous about how it'd unfold.

"Baby trust me, it'll be fine." Steve spoke soothingly. "Come on, let's get your medicine ready, hm?" Steve then put a gentle hand on the small of Nat's back and guided her into the kitchen. Sam, Bruce, and Tony were there too so they can help out with dinner. Given the size of their team, the extra hands were warranted to make enough food in time.

"Hey Nat." Sam looked up and smiled from where he was stirring some pasta sauce. "Wanna come over and give this a taste? We got to make sure it's just right."

"Go ahead, I'll be right with you in a second." Steve said softly and gently nudged Natasha towards Sam.

Personally, Natasha would prefer to stay by Steve's side, but she nodded and walked over to Sam. "What sauce are you making?"

"Just regular old red sauce. If those five are going to be dropped too, then it's best to stick to the basics." Sam shook his head in amusement. Yeah Clint, Bobbi, Lincoln, Daisy, and Wanda tended to be picky eaters sometimes when they're dropped. "Here, give it a taste." He held up a spoon to Nat's mouth.

Nat was about to take the spoon for herself because she didn't need to be fed like this, but then she realized maybe she was overthinking this all again. Instead, she opened her mouth and tasted it without a fuss.

"I think it needs more sugar."

"Sugar?" Sam asked with a small smile.

"She likes the pasta a little sweet." Steve explained on Nat's behalf as he prepared a cup of milk for Nat. Huh, how did Steve know that?

"You don't have to though, if it's just me." Natasha said quickly. "I don't mind, really. It's just a preference." She should have just said that the sauce is fine. It really was.

"Nonsense. More sugar it is." Sam chuckled and grabbed the sugar from the cupboard so he can pour a little bit more in.

"You really didn't have to." Natasha said softly. She wasn't sure if the others liked their pasta sweet. No need for Sam to cater to this one little thing.

"It's fine, Nat. A little more sugar never hurt anybody."

"Well actually--"

"No need to go technical, Bruce." Sam cut Bruce off, making Steve chuckle. "Here, how about this?" He held up another spoon after stirring the sauce for a bit. This time, Nat didn't think twice and just tried the sauce. Yup, just the right amount of sweetness.

"I'm guessing by the smile on that face you got it right, birdbrain." Tony said as he chopped some vegetables.

"Clint's birdbrain." Sam said with a roll of his eyes, but he was smiling too.

"No, he's Katniss." Tony pointed out. "Sometimes budget Legolas. Depends on my mood, really." Everyone chose to ignore these comments because they were used to it by now.

"You know, I think you're on to something here Nat." Sam said after he tried the sauce for himself. "You should've opened my world to this years ago."

"She's got good taste." Steve said with a soft chuckle. Natasha hadn't even noticed that Steve was already behind them holding a mug of warm milk. "I put some honey in it to make it taste better." He said as he offered the mug to Natasha.

With all the others here, Natasha wasn't going to make a scene and reject the cup, even though she really, really wanted to. "Thanks, Steve." She said as she accepted the milk. She was waiting for the others to comment on the milk, maybe tease her about it. But they didn't. Maybe she really did need to give the team more credit. Or maybe she should just relax.

Steve didn't move from his spot, so Natasha suspected he was waiting for her to take a sip at the very least. With that, she sighed and prepared to retch as she brought the mug to her mouth and took the smallest of sips. But then one led to another when she found herself actually liking the milk. What the hell? She hated milk. When Natasha finally pulled the mug away from her lips, she saw that it was almost half empty now. How could she have drank that much without even the urge to puke?

"See? Not so bad, right?" Steve said with a soft smile. "I'll just help Bruce out with the chicken, okay?"

Nat noted how Steve didn't tell her she can go back to the living room, which Nat was fine with. She wanted to stay as close to Steve as possible without making it so obvious, so she opted to stay and chat with Sam while she had her milk and Sam finished up the pasta. It was fine, really. Sam didn't treat her any different from how he did in the past. Not once did Sam even bring up her new toddler status. All of this, Nat greatly appreciated.

What wasn't fine was that Nat was in that fuzzy space of being dropped and not. It was as if her mind was trudging through deep waters and against currents to get through. She found herself wanting Steve a little more and she'd unconsciously glance in his direction more frequently. In her head though, she was being subtle about it. Then again, her judgment's clouded.

"Nat, why don't you go check if Steve needs help? I think I'm all good here." Sam said gently with a small smile. Upon looking at the stove though, Nat saw that Sam just started on another dish.

"It's okay, he has Bruce. I can help you." Natasha insisted, not really seeing through to Sam's attempt at getting her close to Steve.

"Is that the meat for the tacos?" Bruce suddenly asked out of nowhere. Natasha looked over and saw that the man was looking at Sam.

"Yeah oh hey, didn't you say you had some secret spice or something for this?" Sam asked.

"I do, I can show you right now." Bruce nodded his head. "Mind if we switch up for a moment, Nat?" He smiled at Natasha.

Nat wasn't paying much attention to them, really. She was too busy trying to keep a level head as her mind kept telling her to go over to Steve. When Nat didn't respond, Sam took it upon himself to gently nudge her towards the right direction and Nat was finally making her way to Steve.

"You okay?" Steve asked with a gentle smile once Natasha was by his side.

"Yeah, um. I'm here to help?"

"Alright. Why don't you sit here first, and then you can help me once you're all done with that milk, hm?" Steve suggested. Before Natasha could comprehend what Steve was saying, the Big already lifted her up to sit down on the counter next to where Steve was working. "All good up there?"

Yes it was, though Nat couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed too. She wasn't dropped so Steve didn't need to be so doting on her, especially around the team. A quick glance around the kitchen though told Natasha that no one was really paying them any attention. Steve's reassuring smile also pushed down any protests Nat initially had, and instead she just nodded in response.

Nat said she'd help, but even after her milk was all gone she just sat there as Steve worked and talked with her. He didn't help her down, and he didn't ask for help, so Nat just stayed there. She liked being close to Steve and being able to see him too. The position they were in felt comforting without being too intimate and it's perfect given that others were around.

About half an hour later, just as they put the last of the food in the oven, Natasha realized there was much more noise coming from the living room now.

"It sounds like the Littles dropped already." Sam chuckled.

"Yeah I think I can hear Bobbi and Lincoln bickering about cars." Steve shook his head in amusement and lifted Natasha off the counter and down onto her own feet. Nat should be embarrassed about needing so much help in front of the others, but instead she just instantly glued herself to Steve's side. The sound of other Littles in the living room made her a tad bit nervous.

"It's okay, I'm right here." Steve spoke soothingly as he wrapped an arm around Natasha to hold her close. "You ready to go join the team? I'll be right there with you."

This'd be so much easier if Nat was dropped, so she mentally cursed herself for the fact that she couldn't control her drops yet. Instead she's stuck in some sort of limbo where emotionally she felt dropped, but she wasn't.

"Yeah okay." Nat said softly. There's no point in hiding, they all knew she's here anyway. When Steve gave her a kiss on the top of her head, she felt better about the situation even just the slightest. Still, she had to drag her feet with her as Steve guided her to the living room.

Yup, utter chaos managed to ensue. Clint and Lincoln were playing with their RC cars as Bobbi chased the cars around the room and tried to stomp on them. Judging by the sounds she was making, she was pretending to be godzilla. At one point she tried to attack Lincoln, but May was quick to pull her away and direct her towards the cars again. Daisy and Wanda were running around playing tag, with Fitz and Jemma right behind them trying to get them to stop. The other Bigs just looked on in amusement as hell broke loose.

"Lady Natasha! It's good to see you again." Thor greeted as loud as ever, making almost everyone turn their heads to look at her.

"Hi Thor." Nat said softly with a weak smile. That seemed to concern Thor a little bit, but a subtle shake of Steve's head was enough to stop him from pressing.

"Uncle Steve!" Wanda exclaimed when she finally noticed Steve's presence. She quickly made a u-turn and dashed towards Steve and Nat who then unconsciously burrowed herself deeper into Steve's side if that was possible.

"Hey sweethearts." Steve smiled at Wanda and Daisy who soon joined her sister's side. "What did we say about running indoors?"

"Not to." Wanda and Daisy said almost simultaneously. "But uncle Fitz and auntie Jemma are runnin' too!" Wanda defended.

"Mhm, that's why we need to set good examples for them. They don't know what's best." He said in a stage whisper which got giggles out of the two girls.

They weren't really paying Natasha any attention because "cool uncle Steve" was just right there, and Nat was fine with that. Maybe. Steve still had an arm wrapped around Nat to keep her close, so there's that. The Littles rarely paid Natasha any attention whenever they were dropped, even Clint. It's because they don't really know how to act around her, or how to address her for that matter. Having said that, she's used to the Littles practically ignoring her. So how come now, a part of her was hoping one of them would at the very least acknowledge her?

"Uncle Steve we didn't get to finish our tea party! Can we play again pleaaaase? Pretty pleaaaase?" Wanda asked complete with her hands clasped together and big, puppy dog eyes.

"Yeah pretty pleaaaaase?" Daisy joined in. Nat would probably find this all adorable, if it didn't mean that Steve would be taken away from her.

"I don't know sweethearts, maybe not right now, okay?" Steve said apologetically and the two Littles whined. "Maybe we can play after dinner. Are Bunny and Chip going to join us?"

"Maybe?" Daisy parroted and not without a whine. "But uncle Steve you _always_ play with us!" She pouted.

That may be exaggerating things because Steve sometimes had to turn down playtime too, but the occasional play may feel like "always" for the six year old. The threat of an impending tantrum hung heavily in the air, and Steve was obviously trying to diffuse the time bomb.

"Now Daisy, I didn't say no. I said we can play later, right?" Steve said in a gentle voice.

"It's okay, you can play with them." Nat said as she reluctantly tried to pull away from Steve. She was looking down at the floor so she missed the way Steve frowned in concern.

"Baby are you sure?" Steve asked.

"She's not dropped, uncle Steve." Daisy argued. "And she said it's okay. Come oooon! Let's gooo!" Daisy took one of Steve's hands and was already trying to drag him away. Wanda though eyed Natasha curiously, but she was looking back and forth between Nat and Steve.

"I'll be fine. You go and play." Nat insisted and forced herself to smile. She isn't dropped, and she shouldn't be so needy.

After some hesitation, Wanda eventually joined in dragging Steve away from Nat and towards their section of the play area. Seeing Steve go off with other Littles brought about a pang of jealousy that Nat wasn't proud of. In truth, she wished that Steve insisted to stay with her. It was ridiculous though considering she's the one who practically pushed him away, but still: Steve said he'll be "right here" with her.

Earlier, when Steve spoke to Daisy and Wanda, Nat noted his tone of voice. By now, Nat was used to hearing Steve's gentle voice, but she wasn't sure how she felt about him using it on other Littles. Who was she kidding? Daisy and the others have been around longer than Tasha has. If anything, she's taking Steve's time from them. That thought alone made her stomach feel like it was in knots. Were the others going to hate her for bringing about so much change? That worry easily overshadowed her pangs of jealousy. She didn't have a right to be jealous.

All this left Natasha standing alone half-way to the couches. She didn't really know what to do with herself now. Looking around the room, almost everyone was in the middle of their own thing: Clint, Bobbi, and Lincoln were still playing; May and Coulson were discussing something over wine; Tony, Thor, and Bruce were catching up--

"What're you doing just standing there?" Natasha looked up and saw Sam standing next to her.

"Oh, I was just heading back to the kitchen. I, um, I..." For the life of her Natasha couldn't think of any excuse right now. She was just a blubbering mess. It didn't help that she wasn't by Steve when she felt she needed him--no, she did not need Steve. Wanda and Daisy needed Steve.

"Alright, why don't I join you?" Sam suggested, but he left no room for argument as he guided Natasha back towards the kitchen. With the noise now dulled Nat found that it was now relatively easier to think straight. She hadn't even realized that all the noise was giving her sensory overload until Sam pulled her out and away.

"I'm fine, Sam. I was just going to grab a drink." Nat insisted, but she didn't fight when Sam guided her to the kitchen island and pulled back a stool for her.

"I know, but is it a crime to want to hang out with you?" Sam chuckled. He took it upon himself to grab two glasses and pour in some water for himself and Nat. Personally, Nat would have appreciated a different kind of drink right now, but she didn't have it in her to ask. Now she's even farther from Steve and--okay she really needs to stop thinking about that!

"I guess not." Natasha shrugged and thanked Sam for the drink as he sat down next to her.

"I'm happy to see you're so enthused by my presence." Sam said.

"Sorry, it's not you--"

"Nat are you breaking up with me?"

"Oh shut up." Natasha playfully hit his arm, making Sam chuckle. They just sat together in awkward silence for a few moments until Sam spoke again.

"You know, Steve pulled me aside to talk when I got here."

"Oh? He lectured you about jumping off the balcony again?"

"In my defense, I was testing out my new wings." Sam said. "And no, we talked about you, actually."

Why would Steve talk to Sam about her? Was Steve ranting? Was Nat causing too much trouble? Oh, Steve doesn't want to be her heartmate anymore. Did he ask Sam if he'd take her in? Was Sam going to take her in? Sam already had Wanda, and although Natasha loved Wanda, she did think that Wanda could be a handful sometimes too. Both when dropped and aged. Wait, so if Wanda's a handful, surely that meant she's worse.

"What about?" Nat tried to keep her voice even when she asked, though she was filled with dread. A million possibilities of what this conversation could be about were running through her head. None of them were pleasant.

"He said he got your Little registration updated... And part of it was to name someone as your legal caretaker."

Oh, right. Natasha wasn't really able to see who Steve noted down. It hadn't even occurred to her to ask Steve--

"He wrote you down?" Natasha asked softly as she finally turned her head to look at Sam. The small smile on Sam's face told her enough.

"Yeah. He said it might be better for me to talk to you about it than him." Sam scratched the back of his neck. "For whatever reason that is, but I guess we just gotta trust Steve."

"You don't have to be if you don't want to be my--"

"Okay I'm going to stop you right there." Sam turned on his stool so he'd be facing Natasha completely. "Nat, what makes you think I won't want to be your caretaker?"

"I don't know. Why else would you bring it up now?"

"Maybe because it's something we should talk about?" Sam pointed out gently. "You know, this isn't the first time Steve and I talked about something like this."

"What do you mean?" Nat frowned in confusion. Their whole heartmate relationship is pretty fresh, and Steve hasn't seen Sam ever since. When would he have had the time to talk to Sam about this?

"I can't really remember when we talked about it. I think it was after that whole ultron fiasco?" Huh? Well that didn't make sense. "It was a pretty lengthy convo so I'm not going to bore you with the specifics. But the gist was that I promised that if anything were to happen to him, I'd keep an eye on you."

"Keep an eye on me?"

"Nat, Steve's protective of you even before you two bonded. Don't pretend that you didn't notice." Sam pointed out. Honestly, there were instances in the past when Nat did notice Steve's protectiveness, but she just chalked it up to his being her team leader. "So yes, Steve truly cares about you. It's not just because you're suddenly bonded. Your new relationship just strengthened what was already there."

"But my point here is," Sam continued when Natasha made no signs of responding, "the same goes for us. I know you, Nat. And I have a feeling you're worrying that I suddenly feel obligated to care about you just because of this whole caretaker thing."

"Well, don't you..?"

"Have you been paying any attention?" Sam asked in an amused tone. "Newsflash, Nat: I already cared about you even before this, okay? I know you're Ms. Independent and all, but if you just stop to look even just for a second you'll see that a lot of us--all of us do care. Not just Steve or Clint, and it's not because you're suddenly the team's youngest Little. It's because you're Natasha and you're part of the family."

"You know, if you warned me that you were going to give me this mushy talk maybe I would've just stayed in the living room." Natasha teased, but only because the conversation was getting more emotional than she was used to.

"You needed to hear this, I'm sorry." Sam shrugged, and he did not look apologetic at all. "I know Steve and Clint already told you all this countless of times, but maybe you needed to hear it from someone else."

And that's when Natasha realized why Steve wanted Sam to talk to her about the whole caretaker situation. "Yeah, maybe." Nat said softly as she fiddled with her glass of water.

"You're allowed to receive some loving and caring, Nat. Not because you're a Little, but because you're human." It seemed like Sam couldn't emphasize this enough.

"I know, it's just taking some time to get used to." Nat admitted.

"I'm sure you'll get used to it in no time. With that many people loving on you," Sam tilted his head back towards the living room, "it's impossible not to." His smile was so reassuring that it made Nat want to believe him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was hoping to cover more this chapter, but it was already getting too long eep  
> So yeap, Steve picked Sam~ ehe
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys are all safe wherever you are! :)


	17. Chapter 17

Sam and Natasha eventually moved back to the living room so they can be with everyone else. Honestly, Natasha would've preferred to stay by herself in the kitchen, but she didn't want to concern anyone. So instead of retreating to the kitchen, Nat sat with Sam and Thor. The god of thunder was talking about the latest happenings in Asgard, but Natasha had only half her mind on the story.

Hearing Steve play with Daisy and Wanda made her feel some unwelcome emotions, so she didn't understand why she kept glancing their way as that was ten times worse. Part of her wanted to call Steve, maybe even drag him away because she needed him: She was teetering on the very thin line between dropped and aged, and it was taking its toll on her. If they were back home and alone, Nat would've probably approached Steve by now. It's different here though. Other people needed Steve too. That, and it looked like Steve was genuinely enjoying himself as he played with Daisy and Wanda. Did Nat make Steve smile that much when she's dropped?

"But all's good as far as I'm concerned." Thor wrapped up his Asgard life updates. "How have things been around here?"

"Ah you know, been pretty quiet. Nothing big's been happening which is great." Sam shook his head. "This one still insists on going on missions though." He nodded his head to Natasha.

"Need I remind you that it's my job?" Natasha pointed out, but she was looking neither at Sam nor Thor. Steve now had a tiara on his head and was sipping pretend-tea from a pink cup. Normally Nat would snap a picture and use it for fun blackmailing, but for some reason now it was just making her anxious.

"Mhm, and gods know you need a break so I'm glad you have plenty of time off."

"Yes, I do know lady Natasha needs a break." Thor nodded in agreement.

"It's just an expression, Thor I wasn't pertaining to you or any god in particular." Sam tried to explain, but Natasha wasn't hearing the rest of their conversation anymore.

Currently, she was digging a deeper mental hole that was getting harder and harder to climb out of. All the reassurances (albeit few) she felt about being the right Little for Steve suddenly flew out the window. Not once did Nat see Steve even glance up from their tea party to check on her. Maybe that's overreacting, but it was getting to Nat's head. He's so lost in his world with Daisy and Wanda now, and Nat couldn't help but feel like a stranger watching from the outside.

Sure, Natasha told Steve it was fine, that he could go and play with Wanda and Daisy... But she didn't think he'd go so easily. Didn't he sense her hesitations? He was able to pick up on Natasha's discomfort in the past and act on it. Or maybe he did sense her hesitation, and just chose not to act on it. In the past, she'd been the only Little around. Maybe Steve just really needed to caretake, and Nat was the only one providing an avenue for that. Now, the room was filled with a lot of Littles. Steve didn't have to settle with Nat.

"Nat, Nat!" Nat blinked her eyes a couple of times and refocused on Sam who was now crouching in front of her. "It's time for dinner, come on." He said before standing up and holding a hand out to Natasha.

Nat looked around the room and saw that everyone was getting ready to go to the dining room. Specifically Steve, Wanda, and Daisy were getting up from their tea table. Wanda practically ran to the dining room--earning a light scolding from Tony, but Daisy put her arms up to Steve and the latter easily picked her up and held her close. That got Nat's stomach to drop. She quickly averted her eyes and stood up, ignoring the hand Sam offered. She did walk with him to the dining room though.

"Hi baby, how are you?" Steve asked softly when he caught up to Sam and Nat.

"I'm fine." Nat said just as Daisy replied "fine" as well. Nat didn't have it in her to check if Steve really was talking to her, or if she was talking to Daisy. Did Steve call other Littles baby too?

"I was talking to Nat, sweetheart." Steve told Daisy with a gentle voice.

"She's not a baby." Nat could practically hear the pout in Daisy's voice.

"Mhm, but she's my baby like how you're Phil and May's baby." Steve chuckled.

"I'm sittin next to uncle Steve!" Wanda announced as she ran up to them, and Nat unconsciously backed up into Tony who then held her arms to steady her.

"Easy there, red. Dinner's that way." Tony said, but not in the usual teasing tone he used with Nat. His voice sounded soft, as if trying to soothe.

"If Wanda's sittin with uncle Steve then I gots to sit with him too!" Daisy said from where she was perched in Steve's arms.

Nat was really, really hoping to at least be close to Steve during dinner, but it seems as though that was out of the question too. She was about to walk to the other side of the table when Steve reached out and stopped her.

"Where are you going?" Steve frowned. "How about we sit together?"

"But uncle Steeeeeve I asked first." Daisy whined.

"I know sweetheart, but we've been together for a while now and I think I want to sit with Natasha this time." Steve tried to explain to Daisy, but the six year old wasn't having it.

"But Wanda gets to sit with you too! How come I don't? That's not fair, we always get to sit with you." This time, Daisy looked so close to tears with her lips wobbling and eyes watering. She was genuinely upset at the thought of not sitting with Steve. Just like Nat.

The difference though, is that Nat isn't dropped.

"Its fine, Steve. You can sit with them." Nat tried to smile. "I'll just go sit with Sam."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, of course." No she wasn't. But evidently, even Steve seemed to agree with her line of thinking because he didn't say anything more as Nat moved to the other side of the table.

"Nat, you know you can sit with Steve if you want to." Sam told Natasha quietly as she took her seat.

"I know." Nat tried a calm, casual tone but in reality her stomach was in knots. She really wanted Steve, but she felt like she can't have him. Seeing Daisy almost cry because of her made Natasha feel awful. She didn't realize how big of a change she could bring to everyone's routines just by finally dropping.

"Okay..." Sam didn't sound convinced, but he didn't push any further. Maybe even he agreed that Daisy and Wanda needed Steve more right now. "What food do you want? I'm guessing you want some of that pasta, right?"

"Yeah, but I can serve myself." Nat shook her head when he saw Sam reaching for the bowl of pasta.

"Just because you can do things by yourself, doesn't mean you always need to." Sam pointed out gently as he put a serving of pasta on Natasha's plate. "How about some chicken fingers?"

"Those are for the kids."

"I'm not asking who they're for, I'm asking if you want some." Sam said with a shake of his head. "Do you?"

"Yeah, okay." She said softly, but that was enough for Sam and he placed a few on Nat's plate along with some dip.

"Is there anything else that you want?" Sam asked. Honestly, Nat didn't have much of an appetite right now so she shook her head no. "Alright, but let me know if you want anything more." Sam said in his gentle voice again.

Natasha tried to eat her dinner, she really did. But it was so hard to focus on her food when she could hear her Big taking care of another Little when she really wanted him too. At one point, Natasha dared to look up and saw that Daisy was actually sitting on Steve's lap as she ate. That shouldn't have made Nat upset, but it did and it's stupid.

They're heartmates, yes. But it didn't mean that Steve was hers and hers alone. Steve had a life before Tasha came along. He wasn't about to drop that just for her, and he shouldn't. Nat knows Steve's happy with the family he has, so she wasn't about to disrupt it either. Steve keeps telling her that she comes first, that it's not just a honeymoon phase... But maybe he hadn't realized how complicated it'd be with the others actually around. Maybe it's all easier said than done. She'll just have to find her space in Steve's life, wherever that may be.

"Natasha?" Sam spoke, but Natasha didn't hear him. She was trying to tune out everything and just focus on her food; too busy digging a deeper, deeper hole.

"Natasha," it wasn't Sam's voice this time, and it sounded like the voice was coming from a lower point. Upon refocusing back to the world, Nat noticed that Steve was no longer at his seat, but was crouching down by hers. "Baby what's wrong?" He asked quietly.

It was only then Natasha realized that she had tears running down her cheeks. Shit.

"Nothing, it's fine. I'm fine." Nat insisted as she hastily wiped her cheeks. She could feel some eyes on her but she could also hear Sam trying to get the attention off of her.

"Do you want us to go home?" Nat could hear the genuine concern in Steve's voice and it almost made her want to say yes... But her stubbornness won over.

"No, we can stay." Natasha said in barely a whisper. If she ran away from this situation, it'll only get harder for her. She needs to face this now so she can understand her place.

"Okay, but why don't you come and sit with me instead?" Steve suggested.

The fact that that suggestion made Natasha tear up frustrated her to no ends. Natasha opened her mouth to speak, but she felt her voice get stuck in the back of her throat. She didn't want to try again in fear of her voice just cracking and giving away how upset she really was, so she just bit down on her lip and shook her head no.

Steve looked like he wanted to push it, but he didn't. Instead he stood up and reached down for Natasha, easily lifting her into his arms before carrying her out and into the living room. The moment Nat was in Steve's arms, the dams broke and she started crying before she could even hide her face in his shoulder.

"What's wrong? Did Nat drop?" Nat heard Wanda ask as Steve carried her out of the dining room. She didn't get to hear the answer though as Steve was quick to take her out.

Soon, Nat felt Steve sit down somewhere with her still on his lap. He had his arms around her protectively and was whispering reassurances into her ear. Steve would occasionally rub her back and gently rock her side to side, and it was all too overwhelming for Natasha. For the life of her she couldn't stop crying. Natasha knew she needed Steve earlier, but she didn't know how bad it was until she was finally in his arms again.

Her emotions were all over the place, but gradually she could feel herself getting a grip. It took a while, but Natasha's cries were eventually reduced to quiet sniffles. Her mind kept going back to her upset earlier, but she was trying to steer clear of those thoughts.

"Nat? Can you look up for a moment, please?" Steve asked gently after some time.

Nat really, really didn't want to show her face, but this is Steve. Even if Steve would just want to tell her to keep it together, she'll face the music. After a moment's hesitation, Nat pulled back from Steve and just sat up on his lap. She was about to reach up and wipe her face, but Steve beat her to it and gently wiped away her tears with a napkin.

"Can you tell me what this is all about?" Steve asked, his voice still as gentle as ever.

"I don't know, probably just the heightened emotionality Bruce talked about." Natasha tried to shrug it off.

"Mhm, but baby that heightened emotionality's coming from somewhere." Steve pointed out. "Can you tell me what made you so upset? It's just me, you can tell me anything."

"I just... I don't know." Natasha took in a shaky breath. "I wanted to stay with you earlier, but I couldn't... And I needed you at dinner but I felt like I couldn't stay with you." Hearing the words come from her mouth now, Nat realized she got upset over such little things. Still, they were making her tear up yet again.

"If you needed me, why did you insist that it was okay for me to sit with Wanda and Daisy?" Steve frowned in concern.

"Because they're dropped and I wasn't. And they're both actually younger than me so they need you more." Natasha said before bowing her head so she could avoid looking at Steve.

"Nat..." Steve sighed. "We talked about this, right? You come first with me, you always will."

"But then why did you go with them and not me?" Nat asked tearfully. Gods she should shut up.

"Because you told me to, Nat." Steve pointed out gently. "I thought you wanted some space from me, or that maybe you wanted to spend some time with Sam. I could sense that something was up, but baby I can't read minds. Sometimes I need help in figuring out how I can help too. That means telling me if you need or want something, okay?"

"If you told me you weren't comfortable with me not being with you, I wouldn't have left. Even though you aren't dropped, I still put you first. I'm here for Natasha, for all of you, not just Tasha." Steve said.

Actually, now that Nat was able to cry it out and have Steve with her, she realized that maybe all her earlier thoughts were a little over the top--or so she hoped they were. Bruce wasn't kidding with the heightened emotionality during the adjustment period. She really, really hoped this wasn't going to last long.

"I'm sorry." Nat said softly. It was the only thing she could think of saying right now. She probably ruined the dinner because of her little episode.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't able to pick up on what you needed." Steve shook his head, but so did Nat.

"Not your fault my mind was doing somersaults." Natasha muttered. "I'm sorry. I really am trying though... To make this work." She said almost shyly.

"And I'm proud of you for trying." Steve smiled before he tugged Natasha back into his arms so that she was practically cuddled up to him. "I know it's hard, but I can't even begin to imagine what it's like for you. I'm right here though, and so are Clint, Sam, Tony, and everyone else in that room. We're right here to help make it all easier." Steve said as he soothingly rubbed Natasha's back again. Nat didn't really know what to say, so she just nodded her head in response.

"How's your head feeling?" Steve asked after a little while.

"It's a little fuzzy." Nat admitted softly. "Been fuzzy for a while now."

"Maybe you need to--"

"Nat?" Natasha tensed up when she heard someone else join them.

"It's okay baby, it's just Wanda." Steve practically cooed and soothingly patted Natasha's bum. "I'm right here, but if you also want me to ask her to leave, just tell me."

Before Natasha could respond though, Wanda was already standing next to the arm chair where Steve was sat. Just one look at Wanda and Nat could tell the girl was still dropped. She could also see Sam standing by the doorway to the dining room with an apologetic look on his face.

"Are you sad?" Wanda frowned. It took a little while for Nat to comprehend that it was her that Wanda was asking.

"Um, I'm okay." Natasha said a bit awkwardly. She wanted to turn her head and hide in Steve's chest, but she didn't want to be rude and potentially make the seven year old cry.

"You look like you cried." Wanda pointed out. "It's okay. Dad says it's okay to cry when you're sad."

"Wanda, sweetheart. Can you go with your dad for a moment please?" Steve gently asked the little girl, and Nat practically sighed in relief. "Nat and I just need a little moment."

"Okay. But I jus' wanted to give this to Nat." Wanda held a stuffed orange cat up to Natasha. "This is Chip. I like to hug him when I'm sad 'cause he makes me feel better. Maybe he can help make you feel better too. He gives reaaaally good cuddles."

Nat was about to reach for the toy, but she quickly caught herself and stopped. Instead of reaching for the toy, she clutched the sleeve of Steve's shirt. That didn't go unnoticed though, because Steve reached for the toy himself and offered it to Natasha.

"That's very sweet of you Wanda," Steve smiled at Wanda before looking back down at Natasha, who was still eyeing the cat. It wasn't her Nini, but it might just but a good substitute... "baby what do we say?" He prompted gently.

"Thank you." Natasha said shyly before eventually taking the toy and hugging it with one arm. That got Wanda to smile widely too. Surprisingly, hugging the toy did provide Natasha some additional comfort. Her shoulders relaxed and she was basically lying limp against Steve now. She didn't even mind Wanda's presence anymore despite the position she was in. Maybe Steve was able to pick up on that, because he didn't ask Wanda again to leave.

"I think Chip can be a good friend to Nini, don't you?" Steve asked Natasha, making the Little blush but she did nod her head. Natasha wasn't stupid. She knew what Steve was trying to do. After telling him that her head felt fuzzy, Steve was obviously trying to help her drop.

Strangely, Natasha didn't mind. Maybe it was because she was so tired and just wanted to escape--oh, so is this why other Littles love drops so much?

"Who's Nini?" Wanda asked curiously.

"She's... She's my cat. I have one too." Natasha admitted shyly.

"Oooh! Why's she called Nini?"

"Because she has rainbow colored prints..." Natasha didn't really realize that's why Tasha named the cat Nini until she just said that now.

"So rainbows are nini's to Tasha?" Steve asked with a small smile. "I didn't know that." He chuckled softly.

"A rainbow kitty?! That sounds so cool! Can I meet her someday?" Wanda asked hopefully.

Natasha wasn't sure how she felt about showing other people her comfort item, but then again, Wanda did just share hers. Chip looked very well cared for, so maybe she can trust Wanda with Nini.

"I think we brought her with us. Maybe da-Steve has her in my bag." Nat said softly.

"Do you want Wanda to get your bag for us?" Steve asked Natasha as he brushed some hair away from her face. In response, Natasha just nodded so Steve directed Wanda to where Nat's bag was kept. A couple of seconds later, the Little was back with Natasha's backpack in tow.

"Why don't you take Nini out and show her to Wanda and Chip, hm?" Steve asked Nat as he soothingly patted her bum.

This time, Nat didn't hesitate before nodding and sitting up so she can accept the bag from Wanda. She opened the main pocket where she knew Nini was kept and easily took out her stuffed cat. Just the sight of her cat made Natasha ease up tenfold.

"This is Nini." Natasha said shyly as she showed Wanda her cat. She was itching to hug Nini now too, but she still had to show Wanda. Nini's a very pretty and fluffy cat, so Natasha's quite proud of her.

"Wow! She's sooo pretty! I bet she's really really really soft too!" Wanda said with a big smile. "You gotta hug her 'cause she's probably gonna make you feel all better. You get double cuddles now!" Wanda giggled.

"Yeah she does." Natasha said softly in agreement. She was currently hugging Chip with one arm and holding Nini with her free hand. "Nini talks too."

"Does she meow?" Wanda asked curiously with big eyes as if a talking stuffed cat was the most interesting thing in the world. In response, Natasha just shook her head and pressed Nini's paw. Hearing Steve's voice coming from the toy made Natasha smile to herself.

"Aww that's so cute! You get to bring your daddy with you wherever you go!" Wanda gushed.

Currently, Nat was in a very confusing place. She wasn't dropped, but again it sure felt like it. Part of Nat wanted to just change into comfier clothes, curl up in Steve's arms and maybe have a bottle. The other part though was embarrassed that a seven year old was currently talking to her like she's the younger one here. Well technically, in terms of Little ages Nat is the youngest, but she's not dropped now! So why was Wanda talking to her like she was?

"You gotta give 'em biiig hugs now! Like this!" Wanda demonstrated to Nat by hugging herself tightly. If Nat was in the right state of mind, she would've probably found that adorable. Right now though, she was starting to look at Wanda more like a big sister she needs to listen to. That's when Nat knew she was inching closer and closer to dropping.

"Yeah that's it, good job!" Wanda praised Natasha when Nat finally hugged the two cats. The seven year old's praise made Natasha happier than she thought it would: It even brought a small smile to her face. She was starting to get a little shy though so she moved to hide her face in Steve's chest, both cats still tucked safely in her arms.

"Thank you for your help, sweetheart." Natasha heard Steve say just as he wrapped his arms around her again. "I'm sure Nat feels a little better now thanks to you." Well that, and she feels much closer to a drop now thanks to Wanda and Steve.

"You're welcome! I jus' wanna make sure she's okay." Hearing Wanda say that made Natasha want to cry all over again. Maybe she was just overthinking everything and this all could really work out well in the end. If Wanda's any indication, Sam's right about there being people ready to love on her beyond him, Steve, and Clint. "Is she gonna drop soon?" Wanda asked in a quieter voice this time.

"I think so." Steve responded in an equally quiet tone. "Is it okay if you go with your dad first, Wanda?"

"Uhhuh, I can go." Thankfully, Wanda was quick to pick up on what her fellow Little needed and walked away without a fuss.

"How are we feeling?" Steve asked Natasha as he resumed rubbing soothing circles onto her back.

"A little better." Natasha replied. "I think... I think I feel a drop coming. I still don't know how it works though." She frowned. Natasha hated that she still didn't have a grip on her drops. Usually, she's quick to pick up on things so this frustrated her to no ends.

"That's okay. You'll be able to get a hang of it eventually." Steve soothed. "How about we get you changed into your Tasha clothes? Maybe that will help."

That didn't sound half bad, really. Nat did want to get changed into comfier clothes, and Tasha clothes were undeniably the comfiest clothes she had. With that, as soon as Natasha nodded her head Steve carefully stood with her in his arms. He grabbed Nat's bag and shouldered it before holding Nat close as he carried Nat to the nearest bathroom.

"I'm going to put you down first, okay?" Steve made sure to ask first once they got to the bathroom. At that, Nat whimpered, but she otherwise didn't protest. So after locking the door, Steve gently set Natasha down onto her own feet.

"I brought two outfits for you. Do you want to wear your jammies already, or your overalls for now?"

"Not sleepy... But I don't want denim." Natasha said with a slight whine. Her jammies were cozy but she didn't want them to get dirty, and she wasn't sleepy! Denim would be too rough for her and she wanted something soft.

"They're cotton, see?" Steve said as he took out pink overalls with a big heart smack in the middle, as well as a white long sleeve for Nat to wear under it. "These are really cozy too. I even brought your fuzzy socks." They were a simple white pair, but Natasha liked them because they had little bunny ears.

"Okay, wanna wear that." Nat said softly, still hugging the two cats close to her chest. It felt like she was on the brink of dropping but still needed a slight nudge. Steve most likely sensed that because he was using the same voice he always used with Tasha.

"Do you need to go potty before we get you changed?" Steve asked. He laid out Nat's clothes before taking the changing mat out of the bag and laying it out on top of the bathroom counter.

"Nuh uh, no potty." Natasha shook her head. For whatever reason, the thought of using the potty--toilet, suddenly scared Natasha. Thankfully, Steve didn't press further and instead just lifted Natasha up and laid her down on the changing mat.

"I know you're not completely dropped yet, so I'll ask before I do anything." Steve spoke gently. "Are you okay with me getting you changed right now? Or do you want to do it yourself?"

Nat tried to clear her head when Steve talked to her so she took a moment before responding. Part of her was embarrassed to let Steve take care of her like this when she wasn't completely dropped, but another part told her to just trust Steve. "I'm okay with you." She said in a bit of a clearer voice. The trusting part won this time, and Steve smiled at her reassuringly before proceeding to get her changed.

Although embarrassing, it was also comforting to be taken care of especially after that emotional rollercoaster Natasha had just been on. She didn't mind when Steve pulled down her pants, or when she was basically half naked in front of him, or when Steve taped a diaper around her waist. What she did mind were the next words that came out of Steve's mouth.

"Okay baby, can you put down Nini and Chip for a few seconds please?" Steve asked as he helped Natasha sit up once she was diapered and had her overalls half on. That got Nat to whine because she was plenty content with the toys in her arms, thank you very much.

"Don't wanna..." Nat said in a soft, small voice. She looked up at Steve with her lower lip jutted out, genuinely upset by the thought of letting go of her friends.

"I know, but we need to get you into something cozy. You'll feel a looooot better hugging Nini and Chip if you're in cozy clothes." Steve tried to explain. "What if Nini and Chip sit right here so you can see them?" Steve patted the spot right next to Natasha, and luckily it didn't take too long to get the Little to agree. Steve could tell that Nat just needed another little push before fully dropping, so he was treading carefully: He didn't want to somehow pull Nat farther away.

Once the two cats were set down, Steve made quick yet gentle work of finishing getting his Little dressed. Once that was done, he gave back the toys to Natasha before lifting his Little up into his arms again.

"Are you okay with us going back out?" Steve asked softly as he swayed with Natasha who was basically limp in his arms right now.

"Uhhuh." Natasha responded. "Eat dinner?" She asked. Her voice didn't sound like Natasha's anymore, but it didn't sound quite like Tasha's yet either. Just a liiittle more.

"Mhm. Daddy will feed you dinner." Steve practically cooed before carrying Nat out of the room and then back to the dining room.

"It's baby Tasha!" Wanda exclaimed excitedly when they got back. Of course that got everyone's attention and all eyes were now on them, but Steve shook his head.

"Not quite yet, sweetheart." Steve said apologetically as he walked back to Nat's seat. Nat seemed to be comfortable with Sam, so Steve hoped that being near the other man would also help. "She'll be ready to play after dinner, okay? She needs to have her dinner first, and you need to finish yours too." He pointed out gently.

Wanda looked like she was about to whine and argue, but one look from Sam was enough to quiet the girl who then just sighed and went back to her dinner. Steve silently thanked Sam for that as he sat down with Natasha straddling his lap.

"I'll help you cut her food up." Sam offered as he reached for Nat's food.

"Thanks, Sam." Steve said with a soft smile before turning his attention back to Natasha, who was currently hiding in Steve's chest. "Baby you're okay. It's just family here." Steve cooed. He tried to comfort Natasha as much as possible because he knows it can be overwhelming. This is the first time they've been around this many people while Nat was vulnerable.

"But I wanna help Nat." Steve heard Clint whine presumably to Tony.

"I already told you, kiddo. Nat needs Steve right now." Tony explained as gently as possible. "You can go to Nat once she's okay. For now, you can help by letting her be with her Big."

"But she needs me! I'm her big brother." Clint argued. "She needs me."

"I know and you're a very good big brother to her," Tony soothed, "but right now she needs her daddy. I'm sure uncle Steve will let you go over there once Nat's ready."

"I always get to comfort her. This is stupid." Clint muttered and just stared angrily at his food.

Clint's protectiveness of Natasha doesn't seem to waiver even when dropped. The Little looked close to just jumping off his seat and running over to Nat. Steve wouldn't be surprised if that happened, but he also hoped it wouldn't. He didn't know how Natasha would take to the extra attention right now, even if it was from her best friend. The only reason Steve went back here instead of staying in the living room was to remind Natasha that everyone's here for her: That there's nothing she needed to be embarrassed about especially when it comes to her Little side. Just being in the same room as the team is enough for now. They can take baby steps.

Once Natasha's food was ready, Steve thanked Sam once more before pulling the plate closer to him.

"Baby? Can you sit up first please? We need to eat our dinner." Steve gently nudged Natasha, but the Little just whined and shook her head. "Daddy will feed you. You don't need to leave or sit by yourself, I promise."

After a bit more nudging from Steve, Natasha finally sat up but she didn't look too happy to be pulled out of her hiding spot. "Wanna hide." Nat said in a soft voice as she hugged the two cats tightly.

"Why do you want to hide, hm?" Steve asked as he scooped some of the pasta onto a spoon before bringing it to Nat's mouth. Luckily, Nat readily complied and allowed herself to be fed. "There's no one or nothing we need to hide from here."

"What's this about hiding?" Sam suddenly asked. "Does someone want to play hide and seek?"

"Nuh-uh." Natasha shyly shook her head.

"No? No hiding like this?" Sam asked as he covered his face with both hands before gasping. "Where did Natasha go?! I thought she said she's not going to hide?!" That actually got a little giggle from Natasha, so Steve was quite thankful he made the right choice of sitting next to Sam.

"Noo! I'm here!" Natasha laughed and shook her head at Sam. Really, the only indication Steve had that Nat wasn't completely dropped yet was her speech.

"What?! Natasha? Where are you?" Sam continued to play along, looking left and right with his face still covered. That got Natasha laughing and caught the attention of most of their team, but Nat didn't notice. She was too busy laughing at Sam and Steve snuck in a few spoonfuls of pasta when he could.

"Here! Uncle Sam I'm here!" Natasha giggled and she reached out with one hand to pull Sam's away from his face.

"Oh there you are!" Sam gushed. Once Sam pulled his hands away from his face, Steve could see that his friend was smiling widely and looked awfully happy. Maybe it was that Natasha just called him uncle Sam without any prompting. Heck, if that was Steve he'd be smiling widely too. "How about you hide this time?" Sam smiled at the Little.

"Okay! You gotta count!" Natasha giggled and let go of the two cats in favor of hiding her face behind her hands. Steve was quick though and easily caught the toys before they fell onto the ground. In the meantime, he placed both toys on the table while Natasha played with her uncle.

"Alright, alright." Sam chuckled and shared a smile with Steve. "One... Two... Three..." As Sam counted, Natasha would giggle as if she had the silliest secret to hide. Steve and the rest of the team found it absolutely endearing.

The other Littles just wanted to play with their baby sister already, and the aunts and uncles wanted to meet their new niece as well. They knew to give the two heartmates their time though. Steve hadn't told the rest of the team about Natasha's difficulties with her drops, but it didn't look like he had to. The only reason he could think of as to why he'd need to tell them was to help them understand Natasha's needs more. It seemed as though they were already understanding enough, and Steve was grateful for that. Apart from the Littles asking to see their baby sister every now and then, the team was giving them the time that they needed.

"..ten! Ready or not, here I come!" Sam exclaimed. "Hmm... Where could Natasha be?"

In response, Natasha erupted in a giggling fit. For a second Steve wondered if Nat already dropped and he just wasn't able to pick up on it.

"I don't get it. She's not even hiding." Daisy mumbled as she picked at her food. "She's not a very good hider."

"She's still a baby! It's like they're playin peek-a-boo." Wanda pointed out. She personally wanted to go over and play peek-a-boo with Natasha, but she'd already been told countless times to wait first.

"Natashaaa? Natasha where are you?" Sam continued to pretend he couldn't find the Little. "Steve, do you know where Natasha is?"

"I haven't seen her in a while, actually." Steve played along. "She must be a really really good hider."

"I bet she is." Sam nodded in agreement. "But wait! What's this? Is this one of her new toys?" Sam poked Natasha's arm, making the Little giggle even more.

"Hmm, this must be a new one." Steve smiled. He made sure he still had his hold on Natasha as the two played though so she wouldn't fall or anything. "Maybe if you press the right spots it'll talk just like her Nini."

"We should give it a try." Sam chuckled. "What abouuuut here?" Sam lightly tickled Natasha's side and Steve was glad he had a hold on her because that got the Little squirming.

"I think you're getting warmer." Steve chuckled.

"Here?" Sam moved his hand closer to Nat's tummy and tickled her again.

This time, Nat was in an uncontrollable fit of giggles. She didn't last long before she pulled her hands down and exclaimed "boo!"

Sam being the great uncle that he is, looked properly surprised by Nat's sudden "appearance". Naturally that pleased the Little and she looked incredibly happy to have successfully surprised her uncle.

"You surprised me!" Sam exclaimed and he even put a hand to his heart for dramatic flair.

"Tasha win!" Tasha giggled and clapped her hands together. Ah, there she was.

"Yeah Tasha did win! Tasha's a really good hider!" Sam smiled at her fondly.

"Boo an' wah!" Tasha laughed, and Sam looked confused but he was smiling nonetheless.

"I think she's saying you looked funny when you got scared." Steve chuckled and brushed some hair away from Tasha's face. He really needs to learn how to tie hair soon.

"You think I looked funny?" Sam asked Tasha, and the toddler nodded her head while still laughing. "Is my face funny to you?"

"Noooo, face p'etty!" Tasha giggled, and okay that got Sam to smile.

"Okay, okay. I can't hold a grudge against a sweetheart like you." Sam chuckled softly. Yeah, Tasha definitely knows how to worm her way into people's hearts. The way she smiled sweetly at Sam just then was already enough to make both Bigs practically melt from the cuteness.

Needless to say, when the other Littles heard that Nat finally dropped, they became even more insistent on going to their baby sister already. Tasha still had to eat though, so the other Bigs kept them at bay. They didn't want to give Steve a hard time with feeding Tasha. As soon as Tasha was full though, the Littles couldn't be contained anymore so Steve stood with Tasha in his arms and led the way to the living room, all other Littles trailing behind them.

"Uncle Steve uncle Steve uncle Steve can I hold her pleaaaase?" Wanda asked or rather, pleaded.

"Can you hold her? She's not a pet, Wanda." Bobbi rolled her eyes.

"You're too little to hold Tasha, you might drop her." Clint pointed out with a shake of his head.

"Nuh-uh! I'm only a few inches smaller than you and I'm bigger than Tasha! I can hold her." Wanda argued. They reached the living room by then and Wanda turned around so she can look Clint in the face as she argued her point. She even had her hands on her hips like the little diva she could be sometimes.

"You can't hold her! It's not safe." Clint insisted.

"I'm strong! I'm not gonna drop her, she's our baby sister!"

Steve had no doubts about Wanda's strength when she's aged, but it's a completely different story when the Little's dropped. Perhaps yes, Wanda would be able to hold Tasha for a few seconds... Before inevitably dropping the toddler onto the floor. Steve would have to side with Clint on this one. And okay, Bobbi too but that's not the point.

"Okay, okay no fighting. We're all here to play nice, right?" Steve interrupted before the bickering could escalate. All Littles turned to look at him and nod their heads in response. "Wanda sweetheart, I know you're strong but it's a bit hard to hold a baby--"

"But uncle Steeeeve." Wanda whined, but Steve shook his head as he adjusted his hold on Tasha. The toddler was just perched on his hip right now, back to hugging both Chip and Nini.

"How about you sit down, and then she can sit on your lap and you hug her?" Steve suggested, hoping that'd be enough for Wanda.

Luckily, it was. The seven year old's face lit up at that suggestion and she basically scrambled up onto the couch. "I'm ready!" Wanda smiled and held her arms out for Tasha. Steve chuckled at the Little's enthusiasm and walked over to where she was sitting.

"Okay baby, this is your big sister. You know Wanda, right? She's the one who let you borrow Chip." Steve spoke soothingly to his Little.

"Chip." Tasha echoed. She didn't say more than that, so Steve hoped that was the toddler's way of saying she understood and that it was okay for him to set her down on Wanda's lap. It probably did though, because Tasha didn't protest at all as Steve carefully sat her down straddling Wanda's lap.

"Sweetheart, you need to put your arms around her so she won't fall, okay?" Steve gently directed the Little. He had his hand on Tasha's back until Wanda reached around and practically enveloped Tasha in her arms. The next time Wanda spoke, her voice was incredibly hushed and gentle.

"Hi baby Tasha." Wanda smiled at Tasha.

"Hi sissy." Tasha smiled back at Wanda before leaning forward and basically cuddling her big sister.

Steve was watching carefully, so he was able to instantly notice when Wanda's face changed. Instead of smiling, Wanda looked shocked... And upset?

"Wanda? What's the matter?" Steve asked in concern because the Little looked like she was just about to cry.

"Nothin'. M'okay." Wanda insisted as she shook her head, but Steve and the other Littles could easily see that her eyes were welling up with tears. "She's just so cute..." Wanda sniffled, and Steve almost sighed in relief. So they were happy tears, then. Yeah, Steve can relate on a spiritual level to what Wanda was feeling. The first time he held Tasha he wanted to cry too. He found it endearing though how happy Wanda seemed to be about having a baby sister.

"Oh it's okay, I know how you feel." Steve chuckled softly as he crouched down in front of the pair.

"She's... She's so cute and fluffy and she's the cutest baby sister ever!" Wanda exclaimed, and tears were going down her cheeks already. The Little was just so overwhelmed with joy she couldn't take it.

"Mhm, it's pretty nice to have a baby sister, isn't it?" Steve smiled softly and reached up to wipe away Wanda's tears with the pad of his thumb.

"Y-yeah." Wanda stuttered and nodded her head. It seemed as though Tasha finally picked up on her sister's upset because she sat up and looked at Wanda curiously.

"Sissy sad?" Tasha asked with her head tilted slightly to the right.

"No, m'not sad silly." Wanda giggled and shook her head before wiping he cheek with the back of her hand. She made sure that she still had one arm around Tasha though because she didn't want her baby sister to accidentally fall!

"Sissy cry." Tasha pointed out before reaching a hand up and wiping Wanda's other cheek with her hand. "Hug Chip an' Nini?" Tasha reached for the toys and held them up to Wanda. Of course that made Wanda's face crumble and more tears fall down her cheeks. Her baby sister was just so cute and sweet and aaaaagh!

"It's okay baby, sissy isn't sad." Steve was quick to soothe because he didn't want two Littles crying right now. "Sissy is just really happy. Those are happy tears."

"What's going on here?" Sam and some of the other Bigs eventually joined them in the living room and needless to say, they were a bit confused by what they saw.

"Someone's a little overwhelmed about having a baby sister." Steve chuckled softly before grabbing a napkin to clean Wanda's face with.

"M'okay dad." Wanda insisted with a sniffle. "Look! I'm holdin' baby Tasha!"

"Wow you're right! Are you going to take good care of your baby sister?" Sam asked his Little, though he already knew the answer to that question.

"Uhhuh. M'gonna be the best big sister ever."

"Hey I'm gonna be the best big sister ever!" Bobbi pouted and crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"All of you are going to be great big brothers and sisters." Steve tried to placate the Littles. He didn't want tension to build up and luckily Tasha seemed to be doing okay on Wanda's lap.

"Can you stop hogging baby Tasha now? I wanna play with her too." Lincoln whined, and the other Littles voiced their agreement.

"We don't have toys that babies can play with though." Daisy shook her head. "Maybe we can play with her another time." Of all the older Littles, Daisy seemed to be the least keen on meeting her newest sibling. Unlike Bobbi, Lincoln, and Clint who were basically crowding around Tasha and Wanda, Daisy was sitting on the other end of the couch a bit farther from them.

"S'okay, we can play other games. Tasha likes peek-a-boo!" Wanda said with a big smile as Bobbi and Clint climbed onto the couch on either side of her.

Clint took the opportunity then to hide behind his hands for a few seconds before pulling them away and saying "pee-a-boo!" That got its intended result as Tasha burst in a fit of giggles, making the Littles smile and giggle as well because Tasha's laughter was just infectious.

"See? We don't need her toys." Wanda smiled at her baby sister who seemed pretty content to just play peek-a-boo with them. It was precious to watch the Littles interact with Tasha because they genuinely looked like older siblings who have just been introduced to their new baby sister.

Eventually though even Tasha got bored of playing peek-a-boo and the Littles couldn't keep her entertained. She lost interest in the game and tried to climb off of Wanda's lap. Luckily, Lincoln was standing right there so he helped the toddler safely down onto her own feet.

"Tanshu!" Tasha smiled at Lincoln.

"You're welcome!" Lincoln smiled back. "But where are you going?" They all may have gotten bored of peek-a-boo, but they still wanted to spend time with their baby sister. They just met her after all!

"Tasha p'ay!" Tasha told Lincoln.

"How about we teach her how to play patty cake?" Wanda suggested.

"Patty cake patty cake patty cake!" Tasha chanted and jumped up and down. She didn't know what that meant but it sounded fun to say!

"I think she wants to play patty cake." Clint smiled at his baby sister.

They didn't keep the toddler waiting any longer and moved their little group to sit down in a circle on the rug. Tasha sat between Wanda and Clint and Daisy was sitting right across from her, so Wanda suggested that maybe Daisy should teach Tasha how to play. The six year old didn't seem too happy about that, but she obliged albeit begrudgingly. Teaching Tasha how to play patty cake was harder than they all thought it would be, because Tasha just ended up clapping and hitting her thighs every now and then.

"This is stupid. She doesn't even know how to play!" Daisy whined. She was starting to get impatient after just five minutes of trying to teach Tasha the right claps. "She's too little to play with us."

"Patty cake patty cake!" Tasha seemed unfazed though and was just chanting patty cake as she continued her own little claps.

"Maybe she's making her own game." Wanda giggled as she watched Tasha play. She eventually joined in, making sure to copy the toddler's clapping pattern.

When Tasha noticed that Wanda was playing with her now, the toddler smiled widely and got a bit more excited about the game. Eventually, the other Littles joined in. Tasha would mix it up every now and then with a new silly clap or even wiggle. Daisy still thought it was stupid because it wasn't a real game, but she played along only because everyone else was playing.

After some time, Tasha stood up while still chanting "patty cake". The others looked confused until Tasha started doing her own little dance while still chanting patty cake. They all just watched their baby sister for a while, but Wanda eventually stood and joined in on the dancing.

"Are we really gonna do this?" Bobbi asked the others. Their two sisters looked silly, but they looked happy, especially Tasha.

"If you can't beat 'em, join 'em." Clint shrugged before standing up and joining his two sisters.

He didn't dance much at first, but he eventually loosened up when he saw how happy Tasha was to see him dancing too. That got Lincoln and Bobbi to join too, and Daisy [reluctantly] followed soon after. When Steve saw the dance party, he asked for Tony's help in getting a song to play. A couple of moments later, a well-known nursery rhyme started playing in the living room.

"Itty bitty 'pidew!!" Tasha exclaimed excitedly when she heard the song.

"Is this my baby's favorite song?" Steve asked with a smile. Of course he knew that, remembering the time Tasha wouldn't stop singing this and twinkle twinkle when they went shopping.

"Uhhuh!" Tasha nodded her head in response before doing all the little actions and singing along.

Being two, she didn't get all the lyrics right and she stumbled on most of the words, but she seemed plenty happy about her own rendition of the nursery rhyme. By then, everyone had their eyes on the Littles and particularly, on the two year old who seemed to be holding her own concert in the middle of the living room.

"...all da wain an' itty bitty 'pidew up 'pout adain!" Tasha finished the song with a big smile, and that got a big round of applause from the entire room. All the attention made Tasha smile wider if that was even possible and she clapped along and giggled too. She was basically basking in the attention, but she was mainly looking at Steve. Steve was smiling widely too and that made Tasha happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola mi amigos~  
> I know this doesn't have that much Tasha in it, but I was hoping all the other fluff would make up for it ehe
> 
> I hope you're all doing well! Stay safe please <3
> 
> ALSOO  
> If you've got any fic recommendations (hopefully with Little Nat c:) I'd really love them right now. I love writing but I love to do some reading too hehe   
> I've read quite a few but I can't seem to stumble upon new fics ):


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> HELLOOO!! I'm back omg. I know it's been forever and I am SO sorry *crying emoji*  
> This one's slightly longer than usual (I think) but it's sort of a filler chap so I'm sorry aaaa
> 
> I think more exciting stuff's to come though and I'm honestly looking forward to writing the next couple of parts!  
> Hopefully it won't take me as long hehe I am sorry again. 
> 
> Hoping you all are keeping safe :)

"Nooo, bubby no jump!" Tasha whined and even stomped her foot in frustration before reaching a hand up to tiredly rub one of her eyes. 

The Littles were playing a game made up by Tasha, and apparently the rules change every five seconds or so. Much to their credit, the older Littles were actually patient with their baby sister. Steve thought they'd have gotten frustrated by now, but they've proven him wrong.

"Okay okay, I won't jump." Clint tried to placate Tasha. It almost seemed like he was teetering between aged and dropped now. Steve had suspicions that maybe the Little was considering aging given how cranky Tasha was, but honestly Steve wasn't sure if that would be best. It looked like Clint's current attempts to placate Tasha weren't the best either: He was just getting Tasha even more frustrated.

"Baby, do you want to come here and have a cuddle?" Steve asked in a gentle voice, even though he was already picking Tasha up before she could respond. He decided to step in before his Little started full on breaking down.

"Nooo! Tasha p'aaaay." Tasha whined and tried to squirm down from Steve's arms, but she obviously had no more energy in her. Steve barely even had to try to keep her in his arms. 

"You can play after we have a little cuddle. I just miss your hugs: Can I have some Tasha hugs for a little while?" Steve asked as he carried Tasha over to the couch. In truth, he was hoping he could get Tasha to sleep already as it actually was nearing her bedtime. He considered just calling it a night and taking Tasha back to their apartment, but with the state that Tasha was in that probably would end with more waterworks. 

That seemed to get Tasha to stop whining for a moment as she considered Steve's request. "Otay hugs." Tasha eventually relented just as Steve was sitting down, holding Tasha on his lap. She didn't even complain when Steve tugged her to lay against his chest and wrapped his arms around her. 

"You give the best hugs, you know?" Steve said softly as he rubbed Tasha's back in the hopes that it'd soothe her. He really did love the feeling of having his Little in his arms like this. 

"Uh-uh, daddy bes'." Tasha said with a shake of her head before resting it against Steve's chest. Clearly, the Little was exhausted: Her eyes were closing but she just kept forcing them open, and she let out one of the cutest yawns Steve's ever seen. 

"Do you want your baba?" Steve asked when Tasha started to suck her thumb. He half expected her to argue but luckily, Tasha just nodded in agreement. 

"Uncle Steve I can help!" Clint said in an all-too enthusiastic voice, making Tasha wince from the loud noise. Steve was quick though and soothed her before any waterworks could start. 

"Sorry." Clint apologized sheepishly when he realized he was too loud. "But I can help make her bottle." He offered once more. 

"I would really appreciate that, Clint." Steve said with a smile as he patted Tasha's bum. "Do you know how to make one?" 

"Uhhuh, I still remember from when Wanda still--ow!" Clint was cut off when Wanda hit his arm a bit too hard, earning her a glare from the 12 year old. 

Yeah in the beginning when it was just Clint, Wanda, and Bobbi, Wanda did still occasionally drink from a bottle for comfort. When Daisy and Luke came along though, she decided she didn't need bottles anymore because she was technically a big sister now. Whenever someone brought it up, Wanda would get embarrassed but no one ever really minded anyway. 

"Okay kiddo why don't you just go grab Tasha's things, hm?" Tony stepped in before Clint and Wanda started pulling each other's hair out... Again. Before Clint left to get Tasha's bag, he glared at Wanda who just made a face and stuck her tongue out in response. Well, that could've gone worse in Steve's opinion so the Bigs let it go. 

A couple of minutes later, Clint came up to Steve with a bottle of milk in hand so Steve moved to cradle Natasha. "Shh, it's okay baby. Daddy's right here, let me just move you a little so you're cozier." Steve soothed when Tasha whined about being moved. 

"Thank you, Clint." Steve said appreciatively as he accepted the bottle with his free hand. 

"You're welcome." Clint practically beamed. Clint loved being a big brother. Almost everyone knew that so it really was no surprise to Steve that Clint was eager to help whenever he can. 

"Is Tasha gonna go to bed now?" Steve heard Wanda ask as he started to feed Tasha her bottle. He could practically hear the pout in her voice. 

"Yeah kiddo. Tasha's littler than all of you and she needs her rest." Sam reminded Wanda gently. 

Wanda sighed and nodded her head but she looked defeated. "I guess she was gettin' kinda cranky." She muttered, making even Steve chuckle softly. 

"We'll get to play with her more tomorrow." Clint tried to console his other little sister.

Ah that's right. Steve planned to get Tasha's nursery and Nat's room all fixed by tomorrow. Most of the free Bigs were going to help him while the others would be taking the Littles to the compound's park for some playtime. Steve originally planned to just have Nat with them as they renovated her rooms... But then Tony made him realize how ridiculous that was especially if Nat would be dropping.

Plus, at least she could start bonding with her siblings more even before their trip started. Watching Tasha interact with the other Littles earlier made Steve's heart swell. He was so happy to see Tasha getting along so well with other Littles--well, okay. Getting along well until she got too cranky, but that's besides the point. 

"What time should we come over?" Bruce asked.

"Maybe around nine?" Steve said. That would give him enough time to get Nat ready for the day too. "I can make breakfast."

"Alright you got me there." Tony clapped his hands together, making Steve shake his head in amusement. Everyone knew Tony would be early regardless. 

"Hey, if you guys don't mind I think we'll be heading back home now." Steve said. Upon looking at Tasha, he found that his Little was already fast asleep with the empty bottle still in her mouth. "I just want to tuck her in so she can sleep properly." Steve brushed some stray hair away from Tasha's face before trying to take the bottle. That caused Tasha to whimper, but Steve was quick and easily slipped a soother between her lips.

"No problem man." Sam said, and everyone agreed. "Go get that little rugrat all nice and cozy." 

"Thanks," Steve chuckled as he carefully stood, making sure not to jostle Tasha too much. He bid a good night to and thanked everyone before leaving the common floor and heading back to their apartment. Dinner wasn't easy tonight, and they had a couple of bumps especially at the beginning. But Steve was still thankful that Natasha agreed to this.

Yes, he hated seeing Nat so upset earlier, but at least that hiccup helped him better gauge his boundaries with Nat when they're around other people. In hindsight, they probably should have just talked about it beforehand... But Steve had a feeling that this whole heartmate relationship with Nat was going to be a trial and error kind of thing. That didn't mean he wasn't going to do his best to avoid any big mistakes though.

As he laid Natasha down in the middle of her bed and tucked her in that night, Steve was certain that he was the luckiest Big alive. Natasha just looked so content all tucked in the middle of her big bed, Nini snuggled comfortably in her arms. From behind her soother, Steve could see the smallest of smiles and he hoped that meant she was having good dreams.

Yes, he'll definitely give Natasha the best life he possibly can. 

~

The following morning Natasha woke up to the smell of pancakes and the sunlight shining through the gaps in her room's curtains. She yawned as she rolled onto her side to look at the clock on her nightstand. To say that she was surprised to find out it was already seven would be an understatement. Yes, already seven. To most people, that sounds painstakingly early. Not to Natasha though.

Usually she woke up before the sun even gets the chance to rise. Sometimes it was because she wanted to get an early start on her day. Most of the time though, it was due to nightmares. In fact, Nat could probably count on one hand how many times she's slept past six--including the times she was knocked out from injuries sustained during a mission. 

Looking back at it now, Nat realized she has been sleeping a bit better ever since she and Steve became heartmates. But tonight was definitely the best sleep she's had in a while. Initially Nat couldn't put a finger on the cause, but then she remembered last night. Sure, it was one hell of an emotional roller coaster... But did it really help her mind that much to drop around her family?

Natasha blushed as she recalled all the silly things she did last night, but she also couldn't help the smile on her face. She couldn't find the right words to describe how the experience felt, but perhaps the closest would be to describe it as pure and wholesome. Recalling the previous night made her happier than she thought it would, but it was also a tad overwhelming considering all the events. So instinctively, she looked for Steve.

It was as if Nat was on autopilot as she climbed out of bed and followed the scent of pancakes to the kitchen. Sure enough, Steve was pouring over the stove with a plate of pancakes already on the counter next to him. Just seeing Steve made Nat already feel a little lighter, and that was both scary and comforting for her. 

"Good morning." Nat said in a sleep-laced voice before she could stop herself. Steve must have not expected her to be up already because she noticed him jump slightly at her greeting. She tried to hide her amused smile before Steve turned around to give her a warm one of his own.

"Good morning Nat." He greeted. "There's fresh coffee in the pot if you want some."

That wasn't what Natasha wanted though. Just a few days ago, Nat would probably nod her head and make a beeline for the coffee to avoid any potentially awkward conversations. But she was trying to be more open to her new life. So instead, Natasha walked over to Steve and just stood by him as he flipped some pancakes.

"You know, by now I would've thought you'd be better at schooling your expression." Natasha commented, unable to hide the amused smile on her face because of Steve's slightly shocked expression. 

"Well forgive me but I never knew you to turn down coffee." Steve chuckled. Ah shit. Did she just offend Steve by turning down his coffee-- "How was your sleep?" Steve asked before Natasha could continue spiraling. 

"It was good." Natasha said after a moment's pause. "No bad dreams." She added almost hesitantly as she wasn't sure that was information she needed to share, but Steve seemed to think otherwise.

"Yeah?" Steve smiled down at Natasha, and she could sense how genuinely happy he was to hear that news. "That why you don't need coffee to wake you up more this morning?" Steve teased lightly.

"I'm still grabbing a cup later, don't be fooled." Natasha said with a chuckle as she leaned closer to Steve. She meant to pull back when she realized what she'd done, but Steve beat her to it as he wrapped an arm around her and kissed the top of her head. 

"Pancakes and bacon sound good?" Steve asked as he flipped another one.

"They smell good too." Natasha said with a nod, and Steve chuckled in response. 

"That's good because I expect you to eat a lot, you've got quite the morning in store." He said as gently as he could. Ah, that's right... She had to go on some playdate while Steve and the others were going to fix up his apartment--or mostly, her rooms. 

"If you would rather stay here with us while we work, that's also okay. I want you to give the playdate a chance, but what I want more is for you to be comfortable, okay?" Steve added when he probably realized that Natasha was being sucked into her own thoughts. If that's the case, he was right about that assumption.

Natasha was both excited and nervous about the playdate. Being around other Littles while she was dropped was actually fun, but the hours leading up to it and those after aging up were excruciatingly filled with overthinking. Even around Steve last night, Natasha was still a mess before her drop. What more this morning when they would be apart? How would she even react while Steve was away and she was dropped? 

"Um," Natasha couldn't think of a more intelligent response, props. "How long is it going to be?" 

"Hopefully we should be done by lunch, if not then a little after that." Steve answered. Just a couple of hours, then. She should be fine. She'd probably be ashamed of herself for being so needy otherwise.

"It's okay, I'll give it a shot." Nat said before she could talk herself out of it. 

"I'm glad," Steve said with a smile, "if ever you want to, you can always have someone call me and I'll pick you up." He said reassuringly. Yeah Tasha would probably just bawl her eyes out if she needed Steve so that shouldn't be a problem. Plus, it wasn't like they'll be so far apart: The park was literally just a few minutes walk away.

"Honey, why don't you go get changed while I set the table?" Steve suggested gently. At first, Natasha was confused... But then it finally dawned on her. 

No wonder she felt uncomfortable since waking up: She still had her wet diaper on from the night. "How'd you..?" She couldn't even bring herself to finish her sentence as she was too embarrassed, even blushing hard. How had she not realized until then that that was her problem? 

"I just checked while you spaced out there for a second," Steve admitted with an apologetic look on his face. "If you don't want me to do things like that when you're aged, just let me know. I just thought to check now because you were Tasha last time I saw you, and I wasn't sure you had the chance to clean up yet. If you're not comfortable with me doing something like that when you're not dropped, then I won't do that again." He said as he scratched the back of his neck.

If it was anyone else, Natasha would probably be pissed. She was a grown-ass woman (at least right now?) for crying out loud! She didn't need anyone checking on her like she was some baby. But this was Steve, and oddly enough she actually didn't mind. It even made her feel more cared for, for some reason. 

"Um, no. It's okay." Natasha mumbled and blushed a brighter red if it was even possible. Did she really just tell Steve she didn't mind being checked on like a toddler while she was aged? "Just, maybe not when we're in public?"

"Alright, you don't need to worry about that." Steve smiled. "Around the team, or no?" 

Natasha hated that question, but she figured it was warranted. She sighed as she mulled over it. "I guess it's okay? But not in front of people like Fury, please... And I don't know, not all the time? Not while we're in missions, or briefings, or any serious business." 

Steve smiled at Natasha, probably just glad that she was finally voicing out how she wanted to be treated. It was definitely much easier than trial and error. 

"Okay around the team, no Fury, not during serious business," Steve listed off Nat's conditions as he grabbed the plates, "it seems easy enough. You can trust me, Nat."

Nat knew that, but it was good to hear it from Steve too. 

"Thanks," Nat said before clearing her throat. "I'm going to go clean up real quick." She said softly, just wanting to get away from the embarrassment for a moment. Before she could go though, Steve had one more question.

"Do you want my help getting changed?" 

Nat noticed Steve said want, and not need. She wasn't sure how she should feel about that, but it comforted her a little. It was as if Steve knew Nat would automatically say "no" if he asked if she needed help, because she didn't because she's the freaking Black Widow. Asking if she wanted help was a different story. A lot of times, even before she first dropped, Nat did want help with certain things. She just denied it because people always asked if she needed help, and she always thought she didn't. 

Maybe she didn't really want help with this in particular right now, but knowing Steve knows her well enough to ask the right questions comforted her even just a little.

"I'm okay. I'll be quick then I can come back and help." Nat said, but she avoided looking at Steve as she was still feeling embarrassed. 

"Okay, I'll be right here, alright?" Steve reminded her, and Nat just nodded before scurrying back to her room to clean up.

It didn't take long for Natasha to clean up, mainly because she rushed through it in embarrassment. Not 5 minutes later, she'd rejoined Steve in their living room and chatted over breakfast. Natasha was thankful they talked about things apart from their heartmate relationship, or Natasha's toddler status. They joked about some SHIELD gossip (luckily, there was gossip apart from Black Widow's new toddler status) and Natasha judged Steve's inability to keep up with (some of) the times. 

If anything, it reassured her at least that her relationship with Steve wasn't so clouded by their new relationship. They could still hang out like they used to: So that means she can do the same with the others, right? 

"Do you want my help with dropping?" Steve asked gently a little after they've both finished eating. 

"We still need to clean up here." Natasha pointed out. Really, she was just trying to delay the playdate as she was still a tad nervous. "You cooked, so the least I could do is clean up."

"Nat it's fine, I can easily clean this up. You've taught me how to use a dishwasher after all." Steve chuckled, and even Nat had to smile at that. Yeah, it takes a while to teach Steve how to use modern tech, but it was worth it. 

Nat half-expected that response so she wasn't really surprised. She sighed and nodded her head in response to the earlier question. "Yeah I guess. Still can't do it by myself." She said, feeling a little frustrated but trying not to show it. 

"You'll get the hang of it eventually," Steve said soothingly as he stood and walked over to Nat, "it takes time. No one expects you to master it over night." He said as he reached down and easily picked Natasha up. 

"You've told me that a million times," Natasha rolled her eyes in good nature as she wrapped her arms around Steve, "doesn't make it suck any less."

"I know but you won't believe me, so I'll keep saying it until you do no matter how long that'll take." Steve chuckled and carried Natasha back to his room where some of the Tasha clothes currently were. 

Once they got to Steve's room, he balanced Natasha on his hip with one arm so he could use his free hand to grab some clothes. There was a unicorn pants set, a floral ruffle tunic with matching little bloomers, and a purple shirt with a baby koala along with a polka dot skirt. He laid them out on his bed and then looked at Nat. "What do you want to wear for your playdate?" He asked as he gently swayed with Nat.

"I really picked out all of this?" Nat asked with a light blush. She definitely wouldn't have picked these out when she's aged... Although for some odd reason she did find them appealing. 

"Mhm, didn't even need our help." Steve chuckled softly. "I think they're all adorable. Just let me know what you want to wear." He said before kissing the side of Natasha's head. 

"I guess that one?" Nat said with uncertainty as she pointed out to the tunic and bloomers. "Is that gonna show my diaper too much?" She suddenly asked with a frown when the thought occurred to her. They'd be in SHIELD's park so she didn't want to potentially flash anyone--even though they probably wouldn't care.

"No baby, the tunic should be long enough and you've got bloomers. I think that's a lovely choice" Steve said reassuringly. "Do you need to potty first?" 

"Don't gotta." Nat said softly with a shake of her head. She hadn't gone since waking up yet, but she wasn't really up to trying right now either especially if that meant leaving Steve's side. 

"Alright then let's get you changed." Steve said with a smile before setting aside the clothes so he can lay out the changing mat, and then Natasha on top of it. 

Natasha wasn't quite close to dropping yet--not as close as she was when Steve changed her the previous night. So she was feeling a tad more embarrassed now and so she moved to childishly hide her face behind her hands.

"Oh? What's this? Where did Natasha go?" Steve asked, pretending to sound all surprised.

"Steeeve, m'not dropped!" Nat laughed, but it sounded a little more like a giggle than aged Nat's laughter. 

"I can hear Nat... But I can't see her." Steve frowned and Natasha felt a dip in the bed, probably Steve sitting down next to her first. "I wonder where my sweet baby girl went. Is she.... Here?" As he said that, Natasha practically squealed because Steve started tickling her sides.

"Or is she here?" And then her tummy,

"oor here?" even her feet weren't spared!

"Noo, m'right here!" Natasha laughed and pulled her hands away from her face. She wasn't Tasha yet, but she definitely wasn't 100% Nat anymore either. 

"There you are!" Steve exclaimed. "Someone's quite the good hider." He said with a chuckle as he started to pull down Nat's bottoms so he can get a diaper on her. 

"Nuh-uh, you're just not a good finder." Natasha giggled, and of course that made Steve chuckle. Just then, FRIDAY alerted them to Tony and Sam's arrival. That got Natasha to tense up. Any progress she had in dropping was instantly thrown out. 

"FRIDAY please tell them to wait in the living room first." Steve requested as he gently set down Natasha's legs and pulled the front of the diaper up. "Did you hear that baby? Uncle Sam and uncle Tony are here."

"Yeah... Are they helping with the room?" Nat asked as she tried to focus on anything other than getting changed. It still felt embarrassing to get changed, especially considering she wasn't dropped to Tasha yet. 

"Uncle Tony is, but uncle Sam's here to pick you up." Steve explained as he fastened the diaper. "I bet uncle Sam and the others have lots of fun games planned for you guys!" 

"But I can come back if I don't wanna play?" Nat reconfirmed. As the time to leave drew nearer and neared she found herself dreading it more and more.

"Mhm, you just need to tell uncle Sam or another Big, then I'll come right away to pick you up." Steve said soothingly as he pulled the bloomers up Nat's legs before helping her sit up. 

Even after getting dressed, Nat still wasn't dropped and she was getting slightly concerned. 

"Baby maybe you're just thinking about this too much." Steve said in a gentle manner as he crouched down in front of Nat who was seated at the edge of his bed. 

Nat had to roll her eyes because no one needed to be a rocket scientist to figure that out. "Sorry. M'really trying though." She said truthfully. She tugged on the hem of her tunic as she felt a little conscious but she figured Tasha wouldn't care so she tried to shrug it off. 

"I know you are, and I'm proud of you for that." Steve smiled. "You're going to be okay. You like uncle Sam, right? Uncle Sam will take good care of you, and I'm sure bubby and sissy will too." He said in possibly the most soothing voice he could muster. 

Bubby and sissy--er, Clint and Wanda: Natasha almost forgot that they'd be there too. "I like bubby and sissy." Natasha said softly. Admittedly that got her a little more excited to go and play. "And uncle Sam." Natasha added as she didn't want to offend Steve by excluding his best friend. 

"Mhm and they're very excited to play with you this morning." Steve said. He was already using the same tone he uses whenever he talks to Tasha. 

"They are?" Natasha asked timidly. Despite how well the latter half of last night went, she still felt a bit unsure about her place thanks to her toddler status. 

"Of course they are: You're their baby sister, honey. They love you and they want to spend time with you." Steve said with a soft smile. "Don't you remember how they were so excited to finally see you last night?" 

"Sissy cried." Natasha pointed out, frowning as she recalled how Wanda was sobbing as she held Nat.

"Sissy was crying happy tears." Steve chuckled. "Baby she was so happy to hug you, that's why she was crying." 

Apparently, Natasha didn't remember all the details from her drops after all. She definitely remembered Wanda crying, but the reason behind it was blurry. "Sissy not sad?" She asked softly. When Natasha realized she couldn't form proper sentences anymore, her eyebrows furrowed together.

"No, sissy wasn't sad." Steve reassured her. 

This fuzzy space between dropped and aged--Nat wasn't sure how she felt about it. Was it frustrating, or was it calming? She could definitely feel the positive effects of Steve's caretaking more now than when she's aged, but it was also stressful. She could feel herself closer and closer to a drop, but it was as if there was a rope pulling her back. But then she hears and sees Steve, and all that frustration fades for the moment. It was an incredibly confusing space to be in. 

Steve probably sensed Natasha's worry, because the next second he was standing and lifting Natasha back into his arms. He held Natasha close and asked FRIDAY to play some calming music as he gently swayed the Little in his arms. Nat had her head on Steve's shoulder and closed her eyes as she tried to just focus on Steve's presence. She could hear Steve humming to the tune--a clear indicator that the song was definitely from his time. Natasha smiled at that, knowing simple things like this brought comfort to Steve too. 

Maybe it was Steve's humming, or maybe it was just his general presence. Either way it helped, as just a few minutes later Natasha finally managed to drop. 

~

"We were beginning to worry that you suddenly just wanted to keep that little munchkin all to yourself." Tony said in a teasing tone when Steve finally entered the living room with Tasha in his arms.

"Tin man! Big biwd!" Tasha exclaimed happily and clapped her hands in delight. 

"No baby, that's your uncle Tony and uncle Sam." Steve reminded Natasha with a soft chuckle before turning to the two men. "Sorry, just had a little hiccup but we're all good."

"It's no big, man." Sam said as he stood and approached the pair. "Hi Tasha, are you ready to come with me and play?" He smiled at the Little in Steve's arms. If they expected to hear Tasha cheer and clap in delight yet again... They were wrong.

Instead, she simply frowned and tightened her hold on Steve. "Nuh-uh. Tasha stay. Stay wif daddy." She said with a shake of her head. 

"Are you sure?" Sam asked. "Because I think we're going to look for some treasure! Does Tasha want to find treasure?"

"Wow that sounds like a lot of fun!" Steve said enthusiastically as he bounced Tasha in his arms. The Little was still frowning, but she did loosen her hold on Steve a little at the mention of treasure. "Tasha's such a good finder. Did you know that uncle Sam?"

"She is?" Sam gasped. "Well we definitely need Tasha's help then!"

Tasha didn't look so convinced, but she eventually nodded her head. "Tasha help." She was a very good helper, after all! And she wanted to find some treasure to bring back for her daddy!

"Wow then that means we're going to find looots of treasure!" Sam exclaimed. He was doing his best to sound hyped because he wanted to get Tasha excited too. All of them knew about the intense attachment towards your heartmate at the beginning of the relationship: So they were trying to mediate that as well. "Will Tasha come with uncle Sam?" He asked as he held his hands out to reach for the Little.

Much to their surprise, Tasha only frowned at Steve for a moment before turning to Sam and nodding her head. She reached her arms out and made grabby hands for her uncle, and of course Sam smiled widely in triumph. 

"Don't you worry Steve, I'll take good care of this little nugget right here." Sam said as he took Tasha into his arms. 

"Nugget? Munchkin? You two are turning my Little into food." Steve chuckled and shook his head in amusement. He looked at Tasha in Sam's arms and resisted the strong urge to take her back. Tasha didn't look too happy, but she at least wasn't crying or fussing about it. 

"Say bye bye to your daddy, Tasha." Sam gently prompted the Little as he lightly bounced her in his arms. "It's time for us to go and play!" 

"Bye bye daddy." Tasha said in a soft, sad voice. It took everything in Steve to not scoop her back into his arms and just hug her. 

"Daddy will see you soon, okay baby?" Steve said soothingly, partly to reassure Tasha but also himself. "You'll have lots of fun, I promise. When you get back your room will be aaaall nice and pretty for you!" 

"P'etty woom." Tasha echoed softly. She still didn't look convinced about leaving.

"That's right." Steve smiled. 

Sam could probably sense that the two heartmates were still reluctant to part each other, so he took it upon himself and left with Tasha after bidding goodbye to Tony and Steve. As they left, Tasha turned in Sam's arms so she could see her daddy as they walked away: She looked like a kicked little puppy as she looked longingly at Steve who was still waving goodbye. 

Sam cooed to Tasha almost the entire way to the park as he didn't want the toddler to have a meltdown before their morning even started. They passed by quite a few agents who were chummy with agent Romanoff, but thankfully they could sense that Tasha wasn't in the best of moods so they respectfully kept their distance and just smiled and waved at her from afar.

"It's baby Tasha!!" Wanda practically yelled when Sam finally arrived at the park. That caused all heads to turn and most of the Littles came running towards them.

They had a pretty big group this morning: Wanda, Clint, Daisy, Bobbi, Lincoln, Jemma, and Bruce were all there. All the Littles practically crashed into Sam as they tried to say hi to their baby sister, save for Daisy who was lagging a little behind. 

"Alright you rugrats let me at least set Tasha down first." Sam chuckled as he tried to maneuver his way through the Littles. Tasha didn't look all-too happy about the commotion and had moved to hide her face in Sam's neck. 

"Stop it you're scaring her." Clint said with a pout as he along with the others followed Sam back to the picnic table where they had set their things. 

"I take it she wasn't so happy to leave Steve?" Bruce asked in a sympathetic tone. 

He'd volunteered to help with the Littles instead of the room for the same reason as Jemma: They didn't have Littles of their own, so they cherished all the time they had to caretake over their team's Littles. They were all so close and treated each other as family that it felt like the Littles were theirs to care for too. Steve was just like them not too long ago, and like the others they were extremely happy for Steve. They all know how much both Steve and Nat needed each other, so they were willing to help their relationship in whatever way possible.

Today's way is apparently either decorating a nursery, or babysitting and holding a treasure hunt. 

"Not in the slightest." Sam said as he swayed with Tasha as he could tell the Little was getting overwhelmed. "But she's going to have so much fun here, aren't you Tasha?" 

"T'easuw." Tasha said softly, her face still hidden in Sam's neck. 

"Yeah we're gonna have a treasure hunt!" Wanda exclaimed excitedly. "It's gonna be really cool, Tasha! There're lots'a toys an' candies an' chocolate!" 

"Tasha find." Tasha said as she finally sat up in Sam's arms and looked at her siblings. "Down down down!" She chanted and tried to squirm down. Apparently the mention of treats was enough to perk the Little up. 

"Okay hold your horsies there." Sam chuckled and gently set Tasha down. Before the toddler could run off though, he gently took her hand and turned her to face him. "Now Tasha, I want you to stay with your bubby while you look for treasure, okay? Stay with bubby." He repeated so he was sure that Tasha understood.

"Stay wif bubby." 

"That's a good girl," Sam smiled, "Bubby needs all the help and I heard you're the best helper around!" That obviously got Tasha beaming with pride, but towards the back of the group Daisy did not look so happy about that at all. 

After some more reminders to stay near and not to wander off, the Bigs gave the Littles their own bags to put the treats in before sending them off. SHIELD's park was quite sizeable and had a huge playground for Littles of all ages. On weekends it's typically jam-packed with heartmates or Littles who just want to run around and destress from their week. 

This afternoon though, it was just the team and a few heartmate pairs here and there. Still, Sam and the others wanted to make sure that their Littles were safe--especially Tasha. 

Agents are constantly reminded of protocols when it came to dropped Littles: One of which is not to approach other Littles when their Big isn't nearby, unless they look troubled. Still, even Sam had to admit it would be hard to resist at least coming close and saying hi to Tasha. She's the first toddler Little in SHIELD after all; and an adorable one at that! They just didn't want the girl to get overwhelmed and potentially be traumatized by the experience. 

That was why they made sure Tasha was paired with Clint as they trusted him the most to keep her safe, even in his dropped state. Well that, and Tasha didn't seem so stable on her feet yet and they figured Clint would be the most patient with her. They weren't wrong though. 

"Bubby look! Tasha find!" Tasha exclaimed with such a wide smile on her face as she bent down to grab a little package by the bench they'd approached. Tasha almost lost balance but Clint was quick to reach out and steady her. The toddler didn't seem bothered at all that she almost face-planted. "Look!" She said as she held the little bag up to Clint.

"Wow good job Tasha!" Clint smiled at his baby sister. "I didn't even see that! You're so good at finding!" He praised Tasha as he held the bigger bag out so she can place the "treasure" in. 

It made Clint so happy to see his baby sister and best friend having fun. From there, he made sure to subtly nudge Tasha towards the right direction so she could find more. It went well for a handful more times, but after a while they keep coming up empty-handed. By the time they'd get to the treasure Clint spotted, it would've already been gone or Daisy was just about to pick it up. 

Clint and the other Littles noticed, but no one said anything because they thought Daisy was just genuinely playing the game. Unbeknownst to them though, Daisy was actively trying to beat Clint and Tasha to everything. She had to prove that she was the best finder, after all! Sure, she was technically following Clint and Tasha around and just swooped in before they could... But that was besides the point, right?

"Bubby..." Tasha frowned and stopped walking after a while. She looked absolutely defeated and planted her thumb in her mouth for comfort.

"What's wrong Tasha?" Clint asked in a gentle voice as he stood in front of his baby sister and bent down a little to speak to her. 

"No good finder." She said with her little shoulders hunched and her eyes cast down. It's been a while since they last managed to get a package and she was getting discouraged. 

"Tasha's a really good finder," Clint said with a shake of his head, "look at all the treasure you already have!" He said enthusiastically as he opened the bag to show Tasha the presents they found together. 

"Good finder?" Tasha asked. She sounded a little uncertain but this was her big brother speaking and telling her otherwise. 

"Mhm, very good." Clint smiled before pulling Tasha into his arms and kissing her cheek. That got Tasha to smile and giggle before giving Clint a sloppy baby kiss on the cheek as well. Clint would've normally groaned and wiped it off, but he was just happy to hear Tasha giggling so he let it slide. 

Clint was about to suggest returning to the table so they can open the gifts, but out of nowhere Tasha gasped and pulled away. "Bubby!!" She exclaimed excitedly and was jumping up and down as she pointed to somewhere behind Clint.

In his confusion, Clint turned around to investigate and he saw a present just a few feet away from them. That baffled him even more because he didn't recall seeing one there seconds ago--and it was right there in the open too. It all clicked though when from the corner of his eye, he saw Wanda peeking at them from behind a nearby tree. 

Wanda felt bad when she saw that Tasha couldn't find any more presents, so she took it upon herself and laid one of hers out nearby so Tasha could easily grab it. She was keeping an eye out to make sure Tasha would get it and not anyone else. 

"See? You're a really good finder." Clint smiled at Tasha before standing back up straight and taking her hand. "Go and get the present Tasha!" And that's exactly what Tasha did. She practically dragged Clint to the present and picked it up with her free hand all while she had a huge smile on her face. Clint let go of her for just a second so he could open up their big bag, but in that moment Tasha took the opportunity to make a run for it.

Granted, Tasha was still wobbly on her two feet but the toddler was determined to show her uncles and auntie what she found! Clint followed close enough to be able to reach in case Tasha would fall, but otherwise let her run off. 

"Uncle Sam! Uncle Sam!" Tasha exclaimed as she ran towards her said uncle who was seated at the picnic table. She nearly tripped two times but luckily she managed to find her footing before anything else. 

"Tasha Tasha Tasha!" Sam chanted back as he held his arms open for the Little to come running into. Once she did, Sam lifted her to sit up onto his lap. "What's that you got there?" 

"T'easuw! Tasha find." She said proudly with a smile as she held the treasure with both of her hands before bringing it up to her mouth to chew on.

"That's very good Tasha!" Sam gushed. He had an arm around Tasha's back to keep her from falling, but with his free hand he reached down to stop the toddler from putting the bag in her mouth. "How about we open it instead of eating that, hm?" He suggested gently. Luckily Tasha didn't seem to be upset about being stopped as she just nodded and held the bag up to Sam.

"Open p'ease." She requested sweetly; and really, how could anyone say no to that? 

"I got it uncle Sam." Clint said helpfully as he walked closer to them. He wanted to help so his uncle Sam could focus on holding Tasha and keeping her safe.

"Thanks kiddo." Sam said appreciatively as he handed the bag to Clint. "Still dropped?" He just had to confirm because it was sometimes hard to tell with Clint.

"Uhhuh," Clint nodded as he unwrapped the gift. "Do I gotta be big now?" 

"No, no you don't it's okay." Sam was quick to reassure. "I just wanted to ask because you're doing so well taking care of your baby sister: I could have sworn you're big Clint!" He praised the Little, and of course Clint blushed at that. 

"I always take care of her." Clint said shyly as he handed over the toy to Sam so he can give it to Tasha. It was just a little fuzzy ball, but Tasha seemed so excited to hold it. She took it into her two little hands and was instantly busied with her new toy. 

"I know you do." Sam smiled. Clint always keeps an eye out for Nat, there's no doubt about that. 

"Uncle Sam!" It was Daisy this time who was running back over to the picnic table. She looked like she was in a rush, and her bag was definitely considerably fuller compared to those of the other Littles. "Uncle Sam look I got lots'a treasures!" She said as she proudly held up her bag to show her uncle. 

"Wow that's a lot Daisy! Are you excited to open all your prizes?" Sam said with enthusiasm as he fixed the way he had Tasha on his lap so she'd be more comfortable. 

"Uhhuh... Can you help me open 'em?" Daisy asked hopefully. Granted, they were easy to open as you just had to pull on the ribbon but help wasn't exactly what Daisy was after. 

"I'll help you!" Clint piped in, oblivious to Daisy's true intentions and just genuinely wanting to help his little sister.

"No I asked uncle Sam not you." Daisy said to Clint with her eyebrows furrowed. To her Clint was just thwarting her plans so she was quite annoyed by him.

"Sweetheart my hands are a little full right now." Sam tried to explain gently as he nodded to the toddler he had on his lap. Tasha was just sitting with her back against Sam's chest as she played with her fuzzy pink ball: Clint had to reach out a few times to stop her from putting it in her mouth. Yes, he could probably open the presents but he was just being extra careful as he didn't want to accidentally drop Tasha--especially not during her first time away from Steve. "I'm sure Clint's happy to help and I'm really excited to see the presents you got too." 

"Nevermind I can do it." Daisy said with a huff before plopping down onto the ground. Sam raised an eyebrow at that but didn't comment and instead just encouraged her to open her treasure. Soon, the other Littles gathered around too and everyone was opening their goodies. Tasha just stayed perfectly content on Sam's lap as she watched her siblings open all their prizes.

"Look I got a little truck!" Bobbi exclaimed as she held up the said toy. Despite her claims of not needing toys, Bobbi still gets exceptionally excited over new ones. "I bet I can roll it faster than yours." She said to Lincoln who also managed to get a little car from one of his bags. 

"Nuh-uh, you know I always beat you in races." Lincoln stuck his tongue out. It wasn't true though. Bobbi often beat both Clint and Lincoln in races, but the two boys denied it claiming that she always cheated. 

"What's that you got there, Daisy?" Jemma asked the girl over Bobbi and Lincoln bickering. She noticed that the little girl seemed quieter than usual so she was trying to give her a little more attention.

Daisy instantly perked when she was spoken to and sat up a little straighter to talk to Jemma. She had to show Jemma that she got all the cool prizes! "It's a little kitty." Daisy said as she held up a small stuffed cat. It was just the size of the girl's palm, but it was a cute, pastel colored one nonetheless. The word "kitty" got Tasha's attention and she sat up straight on her uncle's lap. 

"Kitty!" Tasha exclaimed excitedly as she pointed to the toy. "Tasha touch?" She asked. It reminded her a lot of her Nini so she wanted to see if it was just as soft But Daisy was quick to shake her head no, not even thinking about it for a second. 

"No it's mine." Daisy grumbled before holding the toy close to her chest. Tasha wasn't going to take another thing from her, no thank you. This surprised the Bigs as Daisy was usually so good with sharing. They were so perplexed that none of them even had time to react before Clint could.

"Tasha you wanna open your other prizes?" Clint stepped in when he saw his baby sister frowning. He too was confused by Daisy's response, but he needed to take care of Tasha first. He held up their bag to remind Tasha of the other presents they found earlier. 

Tasha still looked like a sad little kicked puppy and she shook her head no in response to Clint. 

"But you got lots more toys, see?" Clint said, thinking Tasha was just feeling a little too sad or subdued to open more toys. "Do you want me to open 'em for you?" He just wanted to see her happy again.

"Nuh-uh, haff toy." Tasha reminded Clint as she shook her fuzzy little ball. "Shawe wif bubby." She was plenty content with her ball and felt that she didn't need more toys so of course she wanted to share them with her big brother. 

That got the Bigs' attention and they cooed at and praised Tasha for being so good at sharing. She beamed at attention which got her to easily forget her sadness about the kitty she couldn't touch. Clint didn't really want to keep the toys to himself though, so he managed to convince Tasha they could at least half them--of course letting his baby sister pick which ones she wanted to keep. 

On the other hand Daisy wasn't happy at all with how the morning was unfolding. She got the most prizes and beat Tasha by a long shot: Why was it that Tasha was still getting the most attention? "I'm bored." Daisy said with a huff as she stuffed all her prizes back into her bag. Her plan wasn't a success and looked like it couldn't be salvaged, so she was moving on.

"You got lots of toys how are you bored already?" Bobbi asked without looking up from where she was beating Lincoln in yet another car race. 

" 'Cause we're just sitting around." Daisy said a bit defensively. "Can we go and play? Oh! Can we play freeze tag?" 

"But m'not in the mood to run around." Wanda said with a slight groan as she basically lay down on the ground dramatically. "And baby Tasha can't run she's gonna fall." She pointed out. 

"She doesn't have to play if she can't." Daisy mumbled. She would've been more pushy about it but she was worried that the Bigs would tell her off for it. In fact, maybe Tasha sitting out on this game was what she needed so it made Daisy want to play freeze tag even more. "C'mon Lincoln you always wanna play tag." Daisy nudged the said Little. 

"Yeah... But we're supposed to play with Tasha this morning." Lincoln frowned. 

"Tasha p'ay!" Tasha exclaimed and clapped her hands together, effectively letting her ball drop to the ground. She wasn't sure what game they were all talking about, but she loved playing with her siblings so she was very excited by the idea of another game! "Tag?" She asked curiously with a tilt of her head.

"Nuh-uh, baby Tasha can't play tag." Daisy said firmly. To others it just looked like she was being protective of Tasha, just like everyone else. In truth though, she really just wanted Tasha out of this game. 

"No?" Tasha frowned. 

"No." Daisy repeated. Seeing Tasha look so sad made her feel a bit bad, but she tried to push those feelings away. Tasha didn't need her sympathy. 

"Okay, how about you rugrats play a different kind of freeze tag, hm?" Sam suggested. "One with er... No running." It wasn't a very bright idea, Sam knew that. But he hated how sad Tasha looked about not being able to play tag... Even though she didn't really know what that was. The other Littles seemed to know that running isn't a good idea for their baby sister, so surely he can trust them not to do anything crazy that'll prompt her to run, right? 

"But that's just walkin' around the playground." Daisy complained. 

"I think it'll be fun!" Wanda exclaimed. Any playtime with her baby sister sounded fun in her opinion. "Okay I wanna play." She said as she stood and brushed herself off. The other Littles followed her lead and Sam smiled triumphantly. Yup, best uncle and dad material right here. 

Sam helped Tasha slide off his lap before turning to all the Littles to explain the rules of this new so-called freeze tag. Basically the only difference was that no one was allowed to run. It was a ridiculous concept but hey, they had to adapt to the situation. 

"Are you sure about this?" Bruce asked as the Littles wandered away. The three of them were sat at the picnic table where they could keep an eye on everyone. 

They'd decided that Clint would be first "it" since he was the oldest, so they were all quickly walking away from him. Despite the ridiculousness of Sam's rules, the Littles seemed to be having fun. Clint was even pretending to be some old dinosaur going after them, complete with roars and everything. It made the younger Littles, even Daisy, all giggly as they tried to evade him. Bobbi on the other hand tried to stick close to Tasha this time just to make sure she wouldn't trip on anything--not because she was using her as a shield!

"Well they seem to be having fun," Sam said as he nodded in the general direction where their Littles were playing, "and they're following the rules." 

"Walking tag. Never would I have thought that they would agree to something like that." Jemma said with an amused shake of her head. The Littles usually loved running around and wreaking havoc so it really was a surprise. Perhaps having Tasha around did bring out their gentler sides, or at the very least made them more careful. 

"There's a first time for everything." Sam chuckled softly. "Speaking of first times. I've never seen Daisy snap like that over sharing or some game; or has that happened before?" 

"Not to my knowledge, no." Jemma shook her head. She'd almost forgotten about the six year old's odd behavior until Sam brought it up again. "In fact I have noticed her acting a bit strange recently, even last night." 

"You think it has something to do with Tasha? Or not being the youngest anymore?" Bruce asked. 

"Could be." Sam frowned. "I mean, she's been the youngest for a while so she's probably feeling unsure about having a younger sibling now." 

"I don't think the other Littles are picking up on that." Bruce said in observation, going based off of last night's dinner and how oblivious they seemed to be of Daisy's true intent behind her actions earlier. 

"No need for them to." Sam said as he watched the Littles going about. It seemed as though Clint managed to tag Wanda, and now the girl was going after Daisy. At least it looked like everything seemed to be okay for now. All of them looked like they were having fun, and you could hear the occasional squeal and giggle from the group. "We don't want anyone unnecessarily feeling bad."

Particularly, he meant Natasha. Knowing Nat, Sam could only guess that her uncertainties would heighten upon learning how Daisy felt. He wasn't exactly privy to hers and Steve's relationship or how Natasha truly feels about everything, but considering she's been suppressing her Little side for so long it didn't take a rocket scientist to presume that things are still a bit rocky.

"Sam's right, if anything it's us who should handle this. No need to bring them into the equation." Jemma agreed. "Perhaps we could bring it up with May or Coulson. Surely, if there's anyone who can assure Daisy that everything's alright, it's them, right?" Both Wanda and Clint took well to getting younger siblings down the line, so this was their first time to encounter sibling jealousy in the group. They weren't sure about how to wade through this, but they could only hope that it wasn't anything big they needed to worry about greatly. 

"Well they'd have better luck than any of us, I suppose." Sam said with a sigh. "Hopefully she'll see that there's plenty of loving to go around for everyone." He said, to which Jemma and Bruce nodded in agreement.

The game of modified freeze tag lasted a while, mostly because it took the Littles forever to go from one "it" to another. Still, they seemed to be enjoying and so the Bigs let them play on. Everyone seemed to be following the rules, and all Littles were having fun. It comforted the Bigs so much that they didn't feel the need to watch them every waking second. The three started chatting about the most random things--from the latest experiments, to workout techniques, and even to SHIELD gossip. They'd still check on the Littles every now and then to make sure everyone was okay, but perhaps that wasn't enough.

Jemma was in the middle of recounting one of their team's missions when they heard it: a collective gasp followed by loud cries. All three Bigs turned their heads to look where the Littles were playing and sure enough, Tasha was on her hands and knees on the ground, crying her eyes out. The other Littles were stuck frozen in place, all unsure about how to handle the situation. Even Clint was just staring at her with wide eyes. Luckily, Sam was quick on his feet and he basically jumped off the bench and ran to where Tasha was on the ground.

"Oh Tasha come here honey." Sam cooed softly as he bent down and carefully picked the crying toddler up. "It's okay, uncle Sam's got you, you're okay." Sam said in the most soothing voice he could muster as he carried Tasha back to the picnic table where they had all the bags. He wasn't concerned right now about how Tasha fell: He can get to the bottom of that later. Right now he needed to comfort the poor thing and make sure she wasn't scraped so badly. Shit, Steve's going to kill him.

"Jemma, can you help me look her over and clean her up, please?" Sam asked. Jemma was already getting the medical kit out of the bag while Bruce left to go check on the other Littles. 

"Yes of course, just sit her down on your lap and I'll be ready in a moment." Jemma said and Sam easily complied.

"That must have been a really scary fall, huh?" Sam asked gently as he sat down with Tasha on his lap.

"Ta-asha huwt!" Tasha cried pitifully. Her entire face was red from how hard she was crying and her cheeks were covered in her tears. It was incredibly heartbreaking to watch and Sam hated himself for thinking that modified tag was a good idea. Really? Modified tag? With a toddler?? For crying out loud, Wilson! Before he could continue mentally berating himself, Sam snapped out of it and turned his full attention to Tasha.

"I know, I'm sorry you got hurt Tasha." Sam said with a frown. "Can you show uncle Sam what hurts?" He asked gently as he grabbed a napkin to wipe Tasha's cheeks with, though it was probably useless as the tears were instantly replaced with fresh ones. 

"Hewe, hewe, a-an' hewe!" Tasha cried as she pointed to both her knees and then held her hands up to show Sam. If Sam felt horrible before, he couldn't even describe how he felt now that he saw one of Tasha's knees actually had a small cut. Yeah, he's a dead man. 

"Oh no, oh I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you're hurting, but auntie Jemma's going to help make those owies feel better, okay?" Sam tried to speak soothingly. 

"That's right Tasha, we'll make those owies go away real quick!" Jemma said as he sat down next to Sam with the supplies on her lap. "Can you turn her please so she's sitting sideways? I need access to her knees and hands." She asked Sam.

Tasha didn't seem so pleased about being moved as she only cried harder, but Sam knew it had to be done. "Shh, it's alright. It's alright, Tasha. Uncle Sam and auntie Jemma are right here." Sam cooed to the toddler as Jemma started to gently clean Tasha's knees and hands. Much to her credit, apart from crying Tasha wasn't really protesting much. Sam expected a fight, or for her to start flailing about; but none of that came. She just sat there and pitifully cried her heart out. 

"Such a brave girl we have here huh, auntie Jemma?" Sam said in a soothing voice.

"Mhm, a very brave girl." Jemma nodded. "Very brave and very strong." She smiled at Tasha before going back to dabbing her knees with some medicine. 

"B'ave?" Tasha asked in between her cries. She even started coughing from how hard she'd been crying. 

"Tasha's very brave." Sam repeated as he gently brushed back some stray hairs away from Tasha's face. "You're letting auntie Jemma help clean up your owies, and you told me what hurt. That's a very brave and big girl thing to do." 

"Ta-asha big giwl." Tasha said before coughing once more and wiping her cheeks with the back of her hands. She was still crying, but at least she wasn't full on sobbing.

"And what special sticker would this big girl want on her owies?" Jemma asked with a small smile as she held up the bandaids with different designs on them, though she had a hunch on what Tasha would pick. 

"Nini." Tasha said as she pointed to the bandaid with kitties on them and Jemma happily obliged. She carefully placed it on the small cut before turning back to Tasha.

"Such a brave girl." Jemma repeated softly. She'd grabbed a napkin and tried to wipe away Tasha's tears too. "She has her sippy in her bag, right? I'll go and grab her something to drink." Jemma spoke, now looking at Sam. 

"Oh, um, yeah. Should be in her bag." Sam was feeling a little out of his element as he felt bad. He should have just suggested another game for the Littles to play. He gave in so easily just because Tasha wanted to play tag--but it was just so hard to say no to that face! Still, that was definitely no excuse. He couldn't even imagine how Steve would react once he finds out his Little got hurt under Sam's watch. 

Sam knows Tasha needs him now though, so he pulled himself out of that hole in favor of comforting his niece. "Come here Tasha, uncle Sam's got you." Sam said soothingly as he fixed the way he was holding Tasha so she'd be straddling him instead. He gently tugged her into his arms and soothingly rubbed Tasha's back as Tasha kept her arms between them and clutched the front of Sam's shirt in her hands. 

"Uncle Sam's so sorry you got hurt." He whispered before kissing the top of Tasha's head. 

"No bad. No sowwy." Tasha said, her voice muffled from where it was hiding in Sam's chest. "Tasha bad."

"No, I don't think Tasha's bad." Sam frowned in confusion. He didn't quite get why Tasha would think she's bad. 

"No listen an' fall." Sam could hear Tasha's voice waiver and it could only mean that she was close to crying again. Sam did not want another sobbing episode. 

"Did Tasha run? Is that why you fell?" Sam asked as gently as he could so Tasha wouldn't think that he's mad. Honestly he couldn't get mad at a toddler for that. As an adult he should have had the foresight that running during a game of tag was inevitable regardless of the rules he set out. 

In response, Tasha just nodded her head and held onto Sam's shirt even tighter. It was as if she was anticipating a scolding and Sam's heart broke at that. 

"Uncle Sam's not mad, Tasha." Sam reassured the toddler first, because he hated how tense Tasha seemed to be right now. "Uncle Sam's not mad at you." 

"No mad?" Tasha asked timidly and she even took a chance and peeked at Sam before quickly hiding her face again. 

"Not mad. I'm just sad that you got hurt and that you didn't listen, but I'm not mad." Sam doesn't think it's physically possible for him to get mad at Tasha. 

"Sowwy." Tasha looked up this time and she had a guilty look on her face as she apologized to Sam. 

"It's okay. Now I know you'll listen when we say not to run, hm?" Sam said soothingly. He still blamed himself greatly for this, but he also needed to make sure that Tasha will at least learn to listen to Bigs next time especially about things like this. 

"Uhhuh. Baby yisten." Tasha said before sniffling and moving to wipe her nose on Sam's shirt. Sam grimaced when Tasha did that, but then he realized the other Littles have done much grosser things so he let this one slide just this once. 

"I know you'll listen, because Tasha's such a good, brave, and strong girl." Sam said as he gently squeezed Tasha before placing another kiss on the top of her head. He couldn't see it, but he felt Tasha smiling against his chest and that at the very least made him feel slightly better. It didn't mean he wasn't dreading facing Steve after this, though. 

As all that was transpiring, Bruce checked in on the other Littles to make sure no one else was hurt. It didn't look like it from afar, but it's best to check for yourself especially with this bunch. Once he'd confirmed that they were all unscathed, he decided to get to the bottom of things. 

"Can anyone tell me what happened?" Bruce asked gently as he looked at the five remaining Littles. They were standing in the middle of the park with the Littles just right in front of Bruce in a little semi circle after their mini inspection. 

"Tasha was runnin' and she fell." Wanda said with a frown, her hands behind her back. "We tried to stop her but she was too far, an' she only ran faster when we tried to come after her."

"Which was stupid 'cause she was it anyway an' she din't need to run from us." Daisy mumbled under her breath, not really looking at anyone.

"She's not stupid!" Wanda was quick to defend her baby sister and she looked quite offended as she eyed Daisy. "She's just a baby an' she was just playin. She was going after you and you know we're not s'pposed to run but you still did." She accused Daisy before crossing her arms over her chest. Evidently, Wanda was extremely protective of her new baby sister. 

"I wasn't running you're such a tattle tale!" Daisy argued angrily. 

"If you weren't then why are you calling me a tattle tale?" Wanda narrowed her eyes. 

"Is this true, Daisy?" Bruce asked the girl gently. Given how the Little was acting and considering his conversation with Jemma and Sam earlier, he wouldn't really be surprised. "Can you tell me the truth? I won't get mad."

"Um," Clint cleared his throat and Bruce turned to look at him because he seemed to stand a little straighter, "I'll take these guys back to the table." Yup, Clint aged up just like that. Usually, it took a while for Littles to drop and age, it wasn't as immediate as one may initially think. It took a lot of effort for a Little to transition in a snap, so it wasn't really recommended. Before Bruce could chastise Clint for it though, the archer nudged his siblings away so Bruce could talk to Daisy in private.

"Okay, it's just us now. Can you tell uncle Bruce what happened?" Bruce asked Daisy once more. In response, the girl's face crumbled and soon enough the waterworks started.

"M'sorry!" She cried. "I, I din't mean for her to get hurt! M'sorry!"

"Sweetheart, you know Tasha's not very good on her feet. Why did you run even after uncle Sam said not to?" Bruce asked with a frown. He wanted to comfort the little girl already, but he knew he needed to talk to her about what happened first. 

"I dunno." Daisy shrugged. "I was jus' playin. I'm sorry. I din't wanna hurt her I swear! It was an accident!" 

"I believe you," Bruce said soothingly. "I know you're a sweet girl who wouldn't hurt anyone like that. But Daisy next time, you need to remember that we have to be more careful with Tasha, okay? She's not a big girl like you, Wanda, or Bobbi so we need to watch out for her. And you need to listen to us when we lay down rules. Do you understand?" Bruce kept his voice gentle so Daisy wouldn't think that he's mad.

Bruce had a hunch that this was still connected to the jealousy he, Sam, and Jemma were talking about; but he figured now wasn't the best time to bring it up. Nor was he probably the best person to either. That conversation will have to wait, but hopefully for everyone's sakes it won't be long.

"I know. M'sorry. I'll be more careful next time." Daisy continued to cry. 

Bruce couldn't take seeing the girl cry anymore, so he opened his arms up and Daisy almost instantaneously ran into them. He enveloped the girl in a comforting hug and gently swayed her left and right. "It's okay. I know you're sorry, and I know you didn't mean to hurt anyone." Bruce spoke soothingly as he started rubbing the girl's back too. "It's okay."

He sincerely hoped that things really were okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and yes I changed my username in case anyone's noticed hehe (was just worried about irl friends finding me lol) 
> 
> welcoming any and all feedback~ if you're hoping to see something happen just drop it down below. Though I have most things already laid out for this installment, I might consider some for down the line :). Or i can consider inserting them somewhere, it really depends~
> 
> (yes this book's already outlined til the end and I just generally suck at updating lol I'm sorry)


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is more a filler chapter than anything and probably should have been included in ch18 sorry hehe  
> But on a brighter note, vacation starts next chapter!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After that whole fiasco the Bigs, especially Sam, wanted the Littles to take it easy for the rest of their stay. None of the Littles protested because they were all pretty shaken from how upset Tasha got from her fall, so it was easy to just usher them to the sandbox: It was the easiest option Sam could find. Nothing bad can happen there, right? 

Tasha didn't leave Sam's arms so easily though. She clung to him like a little koala bear for quite some time. Sam didn't have the heart to let her go so he sat in the sandbox with Tasha on his lap for quite a while. After some encouragement from Bobbi and Wanda though, Tasha eventually crawled off of his lap and played with her siblings. Clint also dropped back down to his Little age once he saw that Tasha was fine, so everything seemed to be smooth sailing again for the group. Sure, the Littles were a bit subdued... But at least they were playing peacefully together, right? Even the older Littles looked entertained in the sandbox. 

This time, the three Bigs kept a closer eye on their Littles as they chatted and prepared lunch for the group. Jemma had checked in with Fitz and the others and apparently, setting up the nursery was taking them longer than they'd expected it to. They'd come across some hiccups, but Fitz didn't want to elaborate over the phone so Jemma wasn't quite sure what he meant. If she didn't know any better though, she'd say he sounded a both confused and exasperated at the same time. 

Around noon they'd finished with the sandwiches and decided it was best to get some food in the Littles' tummies before they became cranky. Sam and Jemma got up to call the Littles over, with Sam going straight for Tasha. The toddler was sitting next to Clint with the latter filling a bucket with sand. Tasha was just watching him, but she didn't look the slightest bit pleased. Sam had to give Clint some props for trying to keep her entertained, at least. 

"Hey Tasha, do you want some yummy nummies?" Sam asked as he crouched down in front of the pair.

"Is it lunch time?" Clint asked hopefully. He'd been hungry for a while but he didn't want to leave his baby sister.

"Mhm, sandwiches are with uncle Bruce, kiddo. You can go ahead." Sam said with a smile. As Clint sighed in relief and got up, Sam turned his attention back to Tasha who hadn't responded to his question.

Instead, she looked at her uncle with a deep frown on her face and it was unsettling for Sam. From what he's seen with Tasha she's usually a bubbly toddler. Granted, she had quite the upsetting fall earlier, but she already seemed fine while playing in the sand with her siblings. Sam hadn't even noticed from afar when she started to become more subdued. 

"Do we have Tasha or Nat?" Sam asked gently, thinking Nat might have aged up and wasn't sure how to handle it. 

"Baby." Tasha said so softly that Sam had to strain his ears to hear her. She did sound like Tasha at least. 

"Okay, then how about we get this baby some yummy sandwiches?" Sam reached for Tasha and held her close before standing up with Tasha in his arms. The Little still didn't respond and just rested her head on her uncle's shoulder. Maybe she was tired? From what Sam remembered, her naptime's usually around lunch so that would probably make sense. He kissed the top of Tasha's head and soothingly rubbed her back as he carried her back to the picnic table. 

The other Littles were already seated and were munching away on their sandwiches. Okay, maybe they should have prepared lunch earlier: They were practically inhaling their food.

"Hey, hey. Chew your food, please." Bruce reprimanded Clint gently before turning to Sam. "Is she okay?" He asked with a slight frown.

"I'm not sure." Sam admitted as he gently swayed Tasha, hoping the motion would soothe her. "Could be that it's close to her naptime?" 

"Maybe," Bruce nodded, "I think we should get her to eat something at least before letting her nap."

Sam agreed with that, so he sat down on an empty spot on the bench with Tasha straddling his lap. As he expected, she moved to hide her face in his chest with her hands trapped between them, clutching the front of Sam's shirt tightly. She seemed to do that when she didn't feel the best, so it just heightened Sam's worries even just a bit. 

He was pretty preoccupied with trying to soothe Tasha, so he was thankful when Bruce and Jemma brought Tasha's food and sippy cup closer to him. They'd cut Tasha's peanut butter and jelly sandwich into little bite sized pieces so it'd be easier for her to eat and her sippy cup was filled with warm milk. That should be good for a pre-nap meal, right? 

"Tasha, hey sweetheart. I've got some yummy nummies here for you." Sam cooed but he didn't try to pull Tasha away from hiding in case that'd upset her. 

"No nummies. No hung'y." Tasha mumbled and shook her head. She even held onto Sam's shirt tighter as if to set a statement: She wasn't moving from her spot. 

"No nummies? But how will you get big and strong without nummies? Don't you want to be strong like your daddy?" Sam asked, rubbing Tasha's back soothingly. It was then he felt the toddler stiffen. He could've sworn Tasha stopped breathing for a moment... Before she started to shake and Sam felt his shirt getting wet. Shit, was she crying? 

"Tasha? What's wrong?" Sam asked, his concern only growing as now he could hear her crying too. "Is Tasha tired? Do you want your baba?" Much to his dismay, Tasha whined and shook her head before starting to really cry this time. 

"Maybe she misses Steve." Jemma suggested softly with a frown from across the table. It wasn't soft enough though, because Tasha heard and she only cried harder. If that wasn't confirmation, Sam didn't know what was.

"Oh sweetheart. You miss your daddy, huh?" Sam asked the toddler, which really did anything but help as it just upset Tasha more. It got her out of hiding at least: She moved her head so she can look up at Sam with her tear-filled eyes, large crocodile tears going down her cheeks. Well shit. 

"Da-addy!" Tasha cried pitifully to Sam. Really, Sam should have guessed that first. This was the longest the two had been separated since Nat's first drop so Sam couldn't even imagine how heavy Tasha felt right now. 

"Guys I think I'll need to take her back upstairs." Sam glanced up at Jemma and Bruce before grabbing a napkin to wipe Tasha's face with. Again, it was useless as the tears on her cheeks were almost instantaneously replaced with fresh ones. "She needs a change too, so I guess it's best I bring her up." Sam added as an afterthought. He'd felt Tasha's diaper squish after picking her up earlier, but it only registered with him now. 

None of them had the chance to ask for Nat's permission regarding changes while she's dropped, so they didn't want to change Tasha's diaper in case Nat wouldn't be comfortable with that. Consent was extremely important in the Littleverse, and any good Big or Little would respect that. 

"Daddy! Ta-asha wan' da-a-addy!" Tasha cried. Sam could tell that she was getting quite frustrated probably because they weren't doing anything to get her to Steve quicker. 

"Go on, I can phone Steve and let him know you're on your way back with her." Bruce was already taking his phone out as he said this. Sam didn't need to be told twice and he just quickly thanked Bruce before standing up with a crying Tasha in his arms. It really was heartbreaking to hear Tasha cry, so Sam was trying to cover the distance back to Steve's apartment as quickly as possible. 

"Shh, it's okay Tasha. Uncle Sam's taking you back to your daddy, see?" Sam cooed as he walked quickly past a group of new recruits. They got a few stares perhaps because they were shocked to see the Black Widow sobbing in Sam's arms, but Sam ignored them instead of rolling his eyes like he usually would. He had more important matters in hand (literally) now than teaching recruits not to blatantly stare at others. 

"Daddy now!" Tasha whined and wiped at her cheeks before coughing from how hard she was crying. 

"Yes, yes daddy now." Sam cooed as they got into the elevator. Once inside, Sam swayed with Tasha and bounced her lightly in his arms, but absolutely nothing was calming her down. He and Wanda didn't do well apart during their first few days... But this? This was a bit alarming. To be fair, Nat's never dropped for majority of her life so maybe that factors into her intense separation anxiety. Hopefully Steve's doing better.

"Oh thank gods." Sam hadn't even realized the elevator doors opened until he heard Tony mutter and sigh dramatically. Looking up from where he was cooing at Tasha, Sam found Tony and a worried-looking Fitz. Maybe Fitz was just stressed from how hard Tasha was crying because Sam knew he himself was. "We were just about to come get you two."

"What? How come? Are you guys done?" Sam asked with his eyebrows furrowed as he stepped out of the elevator. Tasha was still a crying mess so they had to quickly talk over her cries. 

"Yeah we finished about five minutes ago." Tony ran a hand through his hair. Sam honestly would have thought that Tony would stay even after they were done decorating, but apparently he was wrong. In fact, now that he was standing a little closer to the man, Sam could've sworn Tony looked tired. "You know... We'll talk about this another time. Go and take that munchkin to Steve." 

"And be careful." Fitz practically blurted out which earned him a glare from Tony, and a confused look from Sam.

"Uh, alright... I'll talk to you guys later, then." Sam said before bidding goodbye to the two and quickly making his way to Steve's apartment. As they got closer, Sam didn't notice it at first, but Tasha's crying started to die down. In fact, by the time they reached the door, Tasha was only sniffling and occasionally whimpering. 

"Hey that's a good girl," Sam said softly. He gave Tasha a kiss on the side of her head before reaching for the door knob and letting himself in. "Steve? Hey Steve I got a little rugrat here who's looking for you!" Sam called out as he stepped inside. Immediately, he saw Steve pacing the living room but the man stopped when Sam announced their presence.

"Daddy!" Tasha exclaimed tearfully when she saw Steve too. 

Sam knew Steve well enough by now, and he could easily tell that his friend was tense, agitated even. But when Sam spoke it was like the switch flipped and the tension left his shoulders. Sam was preeeetty sure that was more Tasha's doing than his own, though. 

As Steve turned to face them, Sam saw a glimpse of what he could have sworn was annoyance, maybe even anger. But the expression disappeared before Sam had the chance to read his friend.

"Hi Tasha," Steve said in his dad voice as he smiled and approached the pair. "Come here baby, why are we crying, hm?" Steve asked. Once he was close enough, Sam carefully transferred Tasha into Steve's arms and the Little practically melted.

"No daddy p'ay. Tasha sad." Tasha explained with a sniffle as she wiped at her cheeks again with the back of her hands. 

"I'm sorry daddy didn't play with you." Steve said as gentle as ever before kissing Tasha on the forehead. "But we made your room all pretty, remember? And I bet you had lots of fun with uncle Sam and everyone." 

Sam felt like he was intruding in a private moment between the heartmates, but he couldn't bring himself to leave. He was looking at Steve, trying to figure his friend out. Something was off but Sam couldn't put his finger on it. Maybe it was the way Steve's jaw seemed a little clenched, or how his shoulder looked a little sti--

"Uhhuh, fun. An' Tasha fall but b'ave." Or maybe Sam was just sensing his death approaching. That could be it too. 

The moment the words left Tasha's mouth, Sam saw it: Steve visibly tensing and you could tell it was an effort to keep his expression calm. Sam gulped, but then he shook his head to himself. This was Steve we're talking about: Not a single violent bone in his body... Unless the fate of the world depended on it, sure. But that was a different story. Sam really should just man up and get this over with.

"Yeah, she um, kind of tripped while they were playing." It was as if Steve only remembered then that they weren't actually alone. His head snapped up and he looked at Sam in confusion, but he didn't say anything. "They were playing modified tag... And well, the kids were being kids and still ran and... Yeah she tried to run too. I'm sorry. Really, I should have known better than to let them play still. I didn't mean for her to get hurt but I know it really was a stupid idea--"

"Sam." Steve cut Sam off, and Sam stopped his rambling but Steve didn't speak again for a while. Steve wasn't really looking at him, he was looking past Sam, and then at the floor. It seemed as if he was trying to collect his thoughts or calm himself down. He couldn't really blame the man, but it made Sam a little uneasy. For her part, Tasha just rested her head on Steve's shoulder and proceeded to suck her thumb. Now that she was in her daddy's arms, Tasha looked significantly more relaxed.

"It's fine. I know you, and I know you didn't mean anything like that to happen." Steve said as he finally looked at Sam. "And really, modified tag?" There was a hint of amusement in his voice. But Sam wasn't fooled: He knew his friend better than this. Steve wasn't really amused.

"Yeah, well I've had stupider ideas you have to admit." Sam said with a chuckle in an attempt to just lighten the mood. 

"Can't deny that." Steve smiled and shook his head to himself. "Thanks for taking care of her."

"Hey you know I've always got you two, no need to thank me." Sam tried to play it cool. Really he just felt like he didn't deserve the thanks after what happened during tag, but he didn't want to dwell on that especially since Steve didn't seem 100% okay for some reason. Maybe the separation got to him bad too after all? Was that why Fitz seemed a little freaked out earlier?

But if it was separation anxiety, Tony would have most likely stayed to comfort Steve or talk him through it. Instead, he left and even seemed exasperated (and still mildly concerned) by the situation. 

"But still. I know she can be a handful sometimes." Steve said with a chuckle before Sam could continue trying to figure things out. "Hopefully this morning didn't scare you away from the trip?"

"The trip? You mean we're coming? She's agreed to it?" Don't get Sam wrong, he was thrilled to go--but he half-expected Natasha to disagree to it, so he wasn't getting his hopes up.

"Well, we planned on talking about it when she got back from the play date." Steve admitted. "But I have a feeling she'll say yes."

"If that's the case then don't worry. I don't think anything can scare me away from that little rugrat." Sam smiled. It was true though, there really was just something about Tasha that drew you to her. Maybe it was the toddler charm. "I'll have to quickly pack mine and Wanda's bags, but we should be ready for the trip. Do you want me to tell the others?" 

"I think I'll tell them myself, but thank you for the offer." Steve said sincerely as he started to sway with Tasha. Taking that as his cue to leave, Sam apologized one more time and after getting another "it's fine" and thank you from Steve, he left the heartmates to their own devices. Still, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong. 

  
"I missed you so much." Steve said in such a soft voice as if he was sharing a secret with Tasha. Decorating the nursery didn't exactly go as planned, but he and the team managed. He was just happy that Tasha was back in his arms--on top of being excited to show Tasha her new room, of course. 

"Mishoo." Tasha said as she sat up in Steve's arms so she can lean up and give him an innocent baby kiss on the lips. That was definitely enough to bring a smile to Steve's face. He was certain he had the sweetest Little yet. It'd only been a few minutes since her return and already, Steve was feeling significantly better than he had while they were apart. 

Planning today's events, Steve knew it wouldn't be easy on Natasha considering her background. What he hadn't anticipated was how hard it would have been on himself. 

"Do you want to see your new room?" Steve asked Tasha before he could dwell too much on his thoughts. Surely, he'll handle separation better over time, right? There wasn't anything to worry about. 

"Woom!" Tasha smiled and clapped her little hands together. After a moment, she stopped clapping and held out the pink ball she still had clutched in her hand. "Daddy." 

"Did you find this treasure?" Steve asked as he started walking towards Tasha's new nursery. He thought Tasha was just showing him the ball, but evidently he was wrong.

"Uhhuh. Tasha find daddy!" She said proudly and then Steve understood.

"You found that for me?" He had to stop walking as he asked with a smile. "Baby that's so nice of you," he said when Tasha nodded in confirmation, "daddy will put it in a special place in my room." He promised the toddler as he accepted the ball. That got Tasha beaming with pride and Steve was glad he accepted it instead of insisting on Tasha to keep the toy. His Little seemed to be quite the sharer. 

Steve continued walking but stopped just right outside Tasha's nursery. On the door was Tasha's name in pink block letters, and his Little just got so excited about that. At first she thought they were just the alphabet, but when Steve told her it was her name she practically vibrated in excitement. That was nothing compared to what was behind the door, however. 

Stepping inside, they were met with a very plush sight: The walls were in pastel pink with trees and different cartoon baby animals painted on them and the floor a nice, complementary wood tone. The cot they'd picked out, now complete with a canopy and little star mobile, was flush against one of the walls. It was already fitted with one of the sheets they bought and had the blanket from Clint neatly draped over the bedding too. 

Near the bed was a little reading nook where Steve saw himself just lounging on the rocking chair as he read Tasha to sleep every night. He of course made sure there was a soft green carpet and several forest-themed pillows lying around in case Tasha would like to look at some picture books on her own too. The book shelf, made in the same material as the cot, was stuffed with so many toddler books they could probably go a year of bedtime stories without repeating one. Still, he managed to sneak a frame in their with a photo Tony gave him: It was of him holding Tasha right after the Little tried to eat her popcorn with just her mouth. Tasha's face was covered in cheese powder and she looked incredibly silly, but both of them were smiling at each other. The look on Steve's face just spelled pure adoration for the little bundle in his arms. 

Steve of course went overboard when they went shopping, but luckily he had the storage space to keep it all. Several shelves along with Tasha's changing table lined the walls but he was assured they all properly baby-proofed everything.

Tasha was quiet as she took everything in, but Steve was hoping she was just speechless or in awe. That silence broke though when she saw her play area. "Daddy! Daddy daddy!" She exclaimed excitedly as she pointed to her special spot. 

Towards the other side of the room was a big area sectioned off with a low and pastel-colored picket fence. Inside, the area was carpeted a pastel green and had all of Tasha's toys laid around. Steve made sure everything would be neat, yet still easy enough for his Little girl to maneuver through and find what she wanted. She had everything from a toy kitchen, a princess dollhouse, educational toys, and all other knickknacks a toddler would want. 

"Do you see all your new toys, baby?" Steve asked with a chuckle as he walked inside the play area and gently set his Little down. Tasha was smiling widely as she nodded, and once she was set down immediately went around to explore. Steve stood aside as he watched Tasha look through her toys: Even the clumsy, excited toddler she was, Tasha still tried to be careful and Steve found it precious. Once she was satisfied she thoroughly surveyed her play area, she explored the rest of her room, pointing out things that she found exciting (almost everything). 

It wasn't easy to pull the nursery together, but everything was worth it after seeing Tasha so happy.

"T'anshu daddy!" Tasha said with a big smile as she toddled over to Steve and gave him a big hug. "Daddy best." 

"Only because Tasha's the best." Steve chuckled as he gathered Tasha into his arms. He smiled at his Little and gave her a kiss on the forehead: A kiss Tasha of course returned on the lips. Steve was about to suggest they play with her new toys, but then Tasha yawned and reminded Steve that it was naptime for a certain toddler. Play can wait for later, for now he carried Tasha over to her changing table and lay her down.

"Look baby, what animals do you see?" Steve had a mobile attached to the changing table too, hoping it would help lessen Tasha's fussing during changes. 

"Moo, daddy!" Tasha said proudly as Steve started to undress her. It seemed as though Steve made the right call with the mobile, because changing Tasha was a breeze! After he got her changed into a fresh diaper, he carried her over to the reading nook and picked out a book to read to her. He sat down on the rocking chair with Tasha comfortably on his lap as he started to rock gently while reading her the story. 

It all seemed easy enough and by the time Steve was done with the book, Tasha was practically asleep. He carefully stood and walked over to the cot where he tried to lay Tasha down... But was met with resistance.

"No daddy no!" Tasha practically pleaded as she clung to Steve with all her (tired) toddler might. "No yeave no yeave!"

"Daddy's not leaving, baby." Steve was quick to soothe but he also brought Tasha back up and held her close to himself. If he was being honest, he wasn't quite fond of the idea of setting Tasha down either. "Do you want to nap in the big bed with daddy?"

"Wif daddy." Tasha confirmed and sniffled. That was good enough for Steve, so he kissed the top of Tasha's head before carrying her out of her brand new nursery and to his room. They'd been apart for a few hours so Steve felt like they needed some cuddle time after all. Tasha seemed to agree: Once Steve was lying down with Tasha curled up to his chest, the Little sighed in contentment. 

Steve held her close and soothingly patted the side of her bum while humming a soft tune. It didn't take long until Tasha fell into a deep sleep and of course, Steve stayed even then.

  
It was about an hour and a half later when Natasha started to stir awake. Waking up from a nap after being dropped for a while was still disorienting and may definitely take some time to get used to. Her head felt a bit clouded, but she chalked that up to her still trying to wake up. She blinked tiredly and rubbed her eyes open before stretching. She only had a shirt and a soaked diaper on under the blankets, but she was too disoriented to care about that. 

"Were you here watching me sleep the whole time?" Nat asked in a sleep-laced yet teasing voice when she finally noticed Steve sitting up next to her on the bed. He had his back propped against the headboard and had his reading glasses on. 

"No, I was reading this while you napped." Steve said with a soft chuckle. He waved the book he was holding in one hand, his thumb between the pages to mark where he last stopped. "Did you have a good rest?" He asked as he reached over with his free hand to brush some hair away from Nat's face, making Nat smile at the gesture.

Steve really as a big, gentle softie and Nat was just basking in the comforts he provided. "Yeah... I guess a perk to being a toddler's I can get away with napping in the afternoon?" Nat rarely took naps before all this and she's come to find that they're quite refreshing.

"One of the many perks, I believe." Steve smiled and shook his head in amusement before setting the book down on the bedside table. 

"Hey, I know I said this already as Tasha... But thank you. For basically remodeling that entire room into a toddler wonderland." Nat said with a shy smile as she rolled over onto her side so she can see Steve better. "And for convincing me to go on that little playdate. It was actually fun, all things considered." She blushed.

"You're welcome, but you don't need to thank me." Steve said. "Anything exciting happen--apart from Tasha's little trip?" He asked with an eyebrow quirked, but Nat saw the ghost of a smile on his lips so she could tell he wasn't upset about it. 

"Nah, it was all innocent fun. Just did some treasure hunt, tag, and played in the sandbox for a bit." Nat said and she couldn't help the smile on her face as she recalled the past few hours. She did have fun with her siblings: It felt so nice to let go and be carefree. She couldn't remember all the exact details of her drop, but the warm, happy feeling definitely lingered after aging. 

"Sounds like you had quite the blast." Steve said. Nat could tell that Steve wanted to say something, but it wasn't coming. She had a feeling he was waiting for her to bring it up herself. Yeah she knew where this was going. 

"I think I want them to come on vacation." Nat said softly. She hadn't been able to think about it for long yet, but maybe she didn't want to. Her heart and gut told her this was the right decision, and maybe just for once, she should listen to her feelings? "If that's okay... And if it won't be much trouble for them." She added as an afterthought. Everyone had their own lives, after all. She didn't expect anyone to go out of their way just to come on vacation with her. 

Steve just looked at her for a moment without saying anything, and Nat was worried she said something wrong. Did she read Steve wrong? Was this not where the conversation was going? Did Steve not want them to come along after all? 

"Baby come here," ah crap, there it was. But wait, Steve had his gentle voice on, and he has his arms open for Nat to crawl into. That didn't look like a "you're in trouble" gesture... Still, Nat was wary as she pushed herself up and crawled into his arms. As she did, she felt a little silly for behaving this way. She should have just sat up and scooted closer to Steve like she normally would have, but those thoughts were pushed to the back of her mind as Steve took her from under her shoulders and lifted her up onto his lap. 

"Is this okay?" Steve checked as he wrapped his arms around Nat. Nat was sitting such that she was straddling Steve's lap so they were facing each other. Nat wanted nothing more right now than to just lean forward and cuddle her Big, all the embarrassment forgotten in the meantime. But she could tell Steve wanted to talk about something, so she just nodded her head. Yes, this was fine. 

"I could tell your mind was running circles again, so I was hoping this'd put a stop to that." Steve answered her unvoiced question with a small smile on his lips. Well, Steve was right about both of those assumptions. 

"I'm that easy to read now?" Natasha asked.

"I think it was more our connection than anything else, don't worry. You still have your top-notch skills." Steve said with a chuckle, and Nat had to give a small smile at that. She liked having this special connection with Steve. It truly was something. "And to calm your worries, it really is okay. I discussed the possibility with them before, and everyone was incredibly open to it. They love you, Nat. You're family and you know that bunch will do anything for family."

"I know." Nat said softly as she tilted her head down to avoid looking at Steve. She was still just trying to get used to finally having an actual place now. It'll take some time, but Nat hopes everything will eventually just feel natural to her. 

She couldn't really keep her insecurities or uncertainties at bay, but that doesn't mean she doesn't feel bad about them. She can tell the team, especially Steve, is trying their best to help her through this transition. The least she could do was to be more open about it. 

"So are you going to stop worrying that pretty little red head of yours, and let me give everyone a call to tell them the great news?" Steve asked.

This time Natasha didn't hesitate. She trusted her gut, and her gut was telling her to trust Steve; so in just a second she just nodded before finally leaning forward to rest the side of her head on his chest. Steve definitely knew what she needed, because the moment she did, he held Natasha comfortably close and kissed the top of her head. 

"I'm so proud of you, Nat." Steve said softly. "You really are one of the strongest and bravest people I know." 

"Speak for yourself, mister casually-rips-a-log-in-half," Natasha attempted to tease, but she had a smile on her face. "But thank you. That means a lot coming from you." 

With Natasha's head on Steve's chest, she could hear and feel him chuckling, and that was an oddly soothing feeling. She sighed softly in contentment and cuddled with Steve for a little while longer.

"So what did happen that made you fall, hm?" Steve asked after some time, but he didn't let go of Nat so she didn't move to leave his lap either. 

"Ah, it's stupid. Or rather, Tasha's legs are stupid." Natasha said as she rolled her eyes in good nature. She did move a little to rip the band aid off because really, it was nothing but a scrape. "Someone ran during tag, and I got a little excited and ran after them." She said with a shrug. At least that was how she remembered it. 

"Someone's trying not to tattle on their siblings." Steve said in an amused tone, and Nat had to chuckle at that. 

"Not a tattle-tale, Rogers." Natasha said. "Besides, it was harmless fun so it's nothing you need to get your American panties in knots for." 

"Since we're on the topic," Steve said and Nat could tell he was trying to choose his words carefully, "baby I don't want to break this cuddle session, but I think you may need a change." Ah crap, right. In the middle of all this comfort she forgot all about her embarrassing getup. 

"Right, yeah. Sorry about that--I don't know how I forgot." Natasha shook her head to herself as she sat up and unconsciously tugged her shirt down to cover her diaper. 

"It's okay, no need to apologize. Do you want my help cleaning up?" Steve asked. 

"If Tasha can handle a little scrape, I think I can manage this on my own." Nat shrugged. She was just trying not to make a big deal out of it because it didn't seem like a big deal to Steve anyway.

"Alright, you go on." Steve chuckled. "I'll be in here reading, in case you want to come back after." 

Natasha didn't really have anything else planned, and she liked the thought of spending time with Steve. "Yeah, okay. I'll be back." She said with a small smile. 

Needless to say, the rest of the day was filled with cuddling and relaxing for the pair. It was a good kind of lazy afternoon and Natasha felt incredibly relaxed by the end of the day. Their phone calls to their teammates to inform them of vacation pushing through didn't even stress her out one bit. Maybe she was just on the way to coming to terms with everything. Don't get her wrong, she can't say she loved dropping or the fact that she was a toddler, but it definitely made things better for her in more ways than one. 

That night, Natasha fell asleep with a smile on her face and her sleep wasn't plagued with nightmares for once. When Steve woke her up at a really early hour to get ready, she didn't even complain. They were going on vacation - as much as Natasha lived and breathed SHIELD, the thought of getting away for a couple of days was incredibly welcome. Nothing can possibly ruing this, right? 

"Why're you still lingering?" Nat asked as she walked to her dresser so she could grab some clothes to change into for the drive. "Don't get me wrong, I enjoy your company but I need to get dressed." She said with a chuckle. 

"I wanted to talk to you about that," Steve was using his careful tone. That most likely meant Natasha wasn't going to like the next words that were going to come out of his mouth. "It's a pretty long drive - in the middle of nowhere, actually. So there won't be much stops."

"Yeah, and?" Nat turned from where she was grabbing clothes so she can look at Steve.

"And you don't have full control over your drops yet." Steve pointed out gently. Yes, Natasha knew that, so where was he goi-- "And I thought about this last night, and I think it'd be best if you wore some protection for the drive." 

"I'm sorry, what now?" 

"It's only a precaution, it's not like you have to use it." Steve said. "It's just in case you drop--or you know, like I said? There aren't much stops..?" Steve scratched the back of his head as he said that. 

"I think I can hold it for a drive, Steve. And I'm not dropping." Natasha knew that wasn't completely true. Whenever they had long trips she was the one who asked for the most stops, and there's also the matter of fact that she can't control her drops. 

"Baby it's hours long and rest stops are far apart from each other. And we don't know for sure if you aren't going to drop." Steve said gently. "I'm not going to force you to wear a diaper if you really don't want to: It's just my suggestion because as your Big, I'm just looking out for you." 

"That's not fair you can't play that card." 

"I'm only being honest, Nat." Steve said with an amused shake of his head.

"It's bad enough I have to use the stupid car seat. I'm not adding this to the list of humiliating things I need to sit through." She blushed. Logically, Nat knew Steve had fair points, but she was also Nat. And Nat was stubborn. 

"There's nothing humiliating about either of those things. The seat's merely for your safety and the protection's a just in case. No one will think any less of you: We've established that, right?" By now Steve was walking towards Nat to speak to her better. "We have those things to keep you safe and comfortable. The whole of you, not just Tasha. And the team knows that baby." 

Natasha sighed and ran a hand across her face. She already had a sweater clutched in one hand and she found her hold on it tightening as she thought more about this. "Who's going to be in the car with us, again?" 

"Clint, Tony, Bobbi, and Maria." Steve reminded her. 

"You're going to make me wear a diaper while aged in front of Maria?" Natasha asked. 

"She's not your boss outside work hours, Nat. She's family and you know that, and you know she can separate personal from professional."

"When did you learn to make valid arguments?" Natasha muttered to herself, but she knew Steve could hear here based on how he chuckled. "Fine. I'll wear one. But we're not speaking of this outside the trip. Ever." 

"I promise." Steve said reassuringly. "Do you want my help getting changed?" Nat was pretty pissed at Steve right now, though she knew her anger was misplaced so she took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. "I can also give you space if that's what you need." Steve added, and that was enough to calm Natasha down.

Really, Steve knew her so well and he really did mean well too. It wasn't fair for her to react this way. 

"No, it's okay. I could use some help." Nat said shyly and she could feel her cheeks heating up a little. She was looking down and held the sweater she had in both hands this time, mindlessly fiddling with it as she spoke. "Don't want to put it on wrong or something and get Tasha all upset in case I drop." 

"Alright that's not a problem at all." Steve said, and there was no hint of judgment in his voice whatsoever. "Why don't you grab some comfy sweats and I'll go get your supplies, hm? And please grab a shirt to wear under the sweater, I don't want you getting cold in the car--I mean, er. I suggest you grab one, if you want." 

If anyone hasn't picked up on it by now, Nat normally didn't like being told what to do. But in this case she actually wanted to follow Steve. "No you're right, I get cold way too easily." Nat said with a soft chuckle as she turned back around to grab more clothes. She even grabbed a pair of fuzzy socks for good measure.

Getting changed by Steve way out of her Littlespace wasn't as embarrassing as she thought it'd be. It even felt natural to let Steve take care of her. Still, that didn't mean she was happy about the whole predicament. As she sat up and finished getting dressed, she winced when she felt the garment between her legs but for her own dignity, she chose not to say anything about it. After several reassurances from Steve that her diaper wasn't obvious, or that no one would care, the two of them walked out to the kitchen to finally grab some breakfast. As for the team, Tony was first to arrive just as Nat sat down at the table with her food.

"Hey Tony." Steve smiled as he greeted Tony. "You're just in time for breakfast."

"Ah if I'd known I wouldn't have eaten before coming here." 

"No problem. How about some coffee?" Steve offered and he looked like he was just about to turn back around and return to the kitchen.

"No, Steve it's okay. I'm capable of making myself some coffee." Tony said in a slightly amused tone. Huh, Nat never knew Tony to reject someone offering to do anything for him.

"Well if you're sure." Steve chuckled. "You know where the coffee maker is."

"Mhm. You want a cup, red?" It took a while for Nat to realize that Tony was asking her. 

"I'm good, thank you." Nat said just as Steve took his seat next to her.

"She's got her cup right here." Steve smiled and placed Natasha's cup close to her plate. Nat smiled back and thanked Steve before going back to eating, so she missed the small yet fond smile Tony had on his face as he looked at the pair before going into the kitchen.

Clint was next to arrive with quite a number of bags in tow. "Um, are you preparing for a month away or something?" Natasha said teasingly when she saw Clint's bags in the living room from where she was seated. Even she didn't have that many bags.

"Gotta be prepared." Clint said nonchalantly as he walked towards them. "And good morning to you too." He gave Nat a kiss on the top of her head. He'd always been affectionate with her so it was a welcome gesture from him. She smiled up at Clint, but then froze when she felt him tugging the back of her sweater down. Shit. Was the hem of her diaper on display or something? She was waiting for a barrage of teasing to come, but none did. Clint just sat down on her other side and began chatting about their plans for vacation and how glad he was to finally get out of this "dump". 

As more and more of their teammates arrived, Steve's apartment started to feel like it was getting smaller and smaller. Nat was used to having them around, but somehow having everyone over now felt different. It was like people were stepping into their little personal space, which Nat knew was ridiculous, but she couldn't help it. 

Nat wasn't sure if Steve could tell she was feeling off, but regardless, she appreciated it when he put a gentle hand on her knee. It was a small gesture, but she knew what it meant: _I'm right here, it's okay._

Wanda was unsurprisingly the last to arrive and by then, almost everyone was ready to leave. "Steve, is it okay if I grab some coffee to go, please?" Wanda asked. For her part, she looked exhausted. Based on what Sam told them, she'd been up practically all night from excitement and it showed. 

"Yeah of course. The travel mugs are in the cupboard right on top of the coffee maker." Steve said with a nod. He probably wanted to tell Wanda to just sleep in the car, and Nat was surprised that he didn't. With a sigh of relief and a quick thanks, Wanda practically made a mad dash for the kitchen before Steve could even turn his attention back to Nat.

"Did you have enough to eat?" Steve asked in his usual (or well, usual for Nat) gentle voice. 

"Yeah, I think you purposely gave me a lot more than usual." Nat said with a knowing smile.

"You caught me." Steve chuckled. "Do you want me to pour your coffee into a travel mug for the drive?" Steve asked as he nodded to Nat's half-full cup. Nat was about to agree, but then she caught herself. Though she was trying to be more open to these changes, that didn't mean she wanted or needed to rely on Steve for everything.

"No it's fine, I got it." Natasha said. "But thank you for offering." 

With that Natasha excused herself from the table, grabbing her cup of coffee before following Wanda into the kitchen. Embarrassingly, she couldn't quite reach the top shelf where her travel mug was. Luckily it was just Wanda there and she was sweet about helping Nat, not even teasing her about it one bit. Back in the dining and living rooms, Steve was letting everyone know it was almost time to go so the two girls hurried--with Natasha of course pouring more coffee for herself from the pot--and joined their team. 

Everyone was grabbing their bags and they were leaving in groups, presumably based on who's riding with who. It was a small relief for Nat to see their apartment slowly starting to empty again, but she knew they'd be leaving soon too. 

"Hey, Steve?" Nat spoke almost hesitantly. Her group was the only one left in the apartment and everyone was grabbing their own bags. She already had hers but a sudden (embarrassing) thought occurred to her.

"Mhm? What's the matter?" Steve asked as he turned to look at Nat. He shouldered his bag before walking over to her, which Nat was grateful for because she didn't really want to talk to Steve about this too loudly. "Do you want me to help with your bags?" 

"Oh, no it's okay, I got them." Nat said honestly. She bit down on her lip and looked around the room to make sure no one was too close by before turning back to Steve. "Did you um... pack Nini?" She swore she felt her face heating up as she asked that. But she didn't remember packing the cat and she didn't see it in her room anymore either.

"Yeah of course I did baby. Nini's in your travel bag, so you can have her with you if you want during the drive." Steve said soothingly. "I packed her for you this morning along with some other stuffies." 

"Oh. Um, okay. Thank you." Nat said awkwardly. She shouldn't have asked. She felt silly for feeling that she needed to ask. 

"You're welcome." Steve said with a soft smile. "Let's go and hit the road then, hm?"


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello hello I am bACK huhu. Happy 2021!!  
> So sorry for the long wait D; I'm not even going to try and explain myself anymore but aaaah I'm sorry.
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy!!

"I'm already sitting on it, isn't that enough?" Natasha asked, though it wasn't really a question. She'd begrudgingly gotten into the car and sat down on her car seat but refused to buckle herself in. Everyone was already inside: Steve behind the wheel with Tony in the passenger seat, Clint next to Natasha, and Bobbi and Maria in the back.

On the way to the car, Nat told herself she wasn't going to make a big deal of it but apparently that got thrown out the window for whatever reason.

"No, it's not. The point's not the seat, it's the belts and you know that." Steve pointed out gently. "Nat, please. They're just seat belts. We're not leaving this spot until you're properly buckled in."

"Then I guess we're not going anywhere because I--"

"Oh for gods' sake." Clint interrupted Nat. It took Nat a moment before she realized what he was trying to do.

"I swear I will snap your fingers off if you don't stop." Nat threatened, but Clint wasn't deterred.

"Mhm, sure. Be my guest." Yeah, he knew her well enough to know that she wasn't beyond holding true to that threat... But he probably also knew she wouldn't do that to him. At least not in front of Hill and Steve. She knew that was an empty invitation and she just glared at Clint as he buckled her in, even tightening the straps.

"This is stupid." Nat muttered under her breath, just as Steve said an appreciative "thank you" to Clint before finally starting the car.

"Hey for what it's worth, I'd sit on it if I could fit." Bobbi says from behind. She was probably trying to be helpful, but it didn't really make Natasha feel any better and she just rolled her eyes. "Looks more comfortable than regular seats."

Okay, well that maybe Bobbi got right. Her seat was actually pretty cozy and even had arm and head rests - but she wasn't going to admit that. If Nat was going to push her stubbornness aside and be honest, she actually did like her seat. It made her feel secure and cared for. But again, that's besides the point. Sitting in her seat, she felt incredibly little: Her feet didn't quite reach the ground anymore and the fact she was diapered too was just intensifying things.

She blushed when she was reminded of her diapered state and decided to just stare out the window, hoping Clint didn't notice her rose-tinted cheeks before looking away.

"Whatever." Was the most intelligent response she could muster. She didn't even know why she was being so sour about the seat. She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment, trying to calm down and remind herself that she's trying to be more open to her new life. And that included all the rules that came with it. Maybe it just didn't sink in how different she was to their other Little teammates until now, now that she had to have a "special seat" because of her Little status, but Clint and Bobbi didn't.

But that's the thing though. That's not her friends' fault. She didn't need to take it out on them or give them a hard time. They took a large chunk of their very few vacation days to help her and Steve. She didn't have the right to give them attitude.

"I'm sorry." She said softly after a couple of minutes. "I didn't mean to make a fuss about it. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Nat." Nat could hear the reassurance in Steve's voice and she caught him glancing at her through the rearview mirror.

"And for the record I wouldn't have snapped your fingers." She told Clint, mainly because she wanted to make that clear to Maria in case there was still a trace of agent Hill in her right now.

"Yeah I know you're all bark and no bite so no offense tak--OW!"

"No bite, huh?" Nat said right after hitting Clint's arm. It wasn't even that hard.

"Hey hey, you two play nice." Tony chastised and for a second, Natasha thought she was in trouble for hitting Tony's heartmate. She was about to apologize again but Tony beat her to it.

"Katniss you're losing your game if that hurt you." Tony pointed out as he turned around in his seat to look at both of them. "That sounded barely like a love tap."

"You're supposed to be on my side." Clint said in mock offense but Nat could tell none was taken. From there, things thankfully started to fall in place albeit gradually. Tony and Clint bickered for a while more until Bobbi groaned and told them to shut up before she unleashes Natasha's wrath on them. Nat wasn't quite sure how she felt about being used as a threat to her friends, but she was glad that at least got the two to quit their mock-arguments about loyalty.

Bobbi fell asleep with her head on Maria's shoulder not long after, and Maria took that as an open opportunity to get some rest as well. Steve and Tony chatted about their plans for the trip, while Clint took out his tablet for him and Natasha to watch a movie. Steve reminded them not to watch anything scary - to which Natasha rolled her eyes, but didn't argue with him about it. That wasn't really an official rule for toddler Littles, but for some reason Steve found it necessary for Natasha.

They settled on the Harry Potter films since Nat hasn't been able to finish those yet, which apparently was an insult to all humankind, according to Clint. She just rolled her eyes at him and held her travel mug, taking sips of her coffee every now and then as she watched the movie with Clint.

"Jeez, Nat? How are you staying calm right now?" Tony asked in disbelief about an hour into the first movie. Nat didn't quite understand at first, but then she realized Tony must be referring to how Clint was incessantly talking about what was happening on screen.

"Ah. I just learned to drone him out. Not that hard." She said dismissively, not taking her eyes off the screen. She'd long finished her coffee and put the mug back in her seat's cup holder. Her stomach's been aching for quite a while now too, but she was trying to push that to the back of her mind.

"Please teach me your ways." Tony sighed dramatically. "Can't seem to sit through an entire film without Clint narrating the whole damn plot."

"Is this some sort of attack Clint day that I wasn't made aware of?" Clint asked incredulously, but Natasha could tell he wasn't really offended.

"Nat, you okay?" Steve asked when he glanced at her at a red light.

"What?" Natasha frowned and looked up in confusion. It was then she realized she had her arms wrapped around her middle. Natasha had been holding the tablet with Clint earlier, but at some point she let go in favor of hugging herself for comfort. "Oh. Um, yeah. Just a little cold that's all." It wasn't a complete lie.

"I packed one of your blankets in your travel bag if you want it." Steve said. "Clint, would you mind getting it for her, please?" he asked, probably because Nat wouldn't be able to reach it on the floor herself.

"Yeah of course. Could you hold this first?" Clint asked, nodding to the tablet. Nat wanted to say no because she really didn't want to move her arms, but she didn't want to look suspicious so she nodded and took the tablet into her own hands. Now that Nat's acknowledged her stomach more, she realized it hurt a lot more than it had earlier.

It wasn't anything horrible, she's definitely gone through more painful ordeals. But this was one type of pain she was hoping she wouldn't have to encounter during their drive. Maybe she shouldn't have gotten that extra coffee, or eaten so much at breakfast. Or maybe she should have at least tried to use the bathroom before leaving - she knows she should have but she was more concerned about her freaking cat plush being packed! So stupid!

"Here, let me take that first." Clint's voice pulled her out of her own thoughts and she let him take the tablet. The moment her hands were free, she wrapped her arms back around herself but she tried not to look too suspicious, whatever that meant. For good measure she even fake shivered as Clint draped the soft, purple blanket over her and tucked it behind her shoulders. "All better?" He asked as he reached up and moved the AC so it wasn't blasting directly at her anymore.

"Yeah," not really, "thanks," she said with a small smile, but then grimaced when she felt another cramp in her stomach. Luckily, Clint had looked away by then to play the movie for them so he didn't notice Natasha's predicament still. It was about another hour until the pain started to become unbearable for Natasha and she started squirming about more in her seat. In her head she was being inconspicuous, not knowing that Clint was starting to worry slightly.

"You okay? Are the belts too tight?" Clint asked curiously and that seemed to get Steve's attention. He was still talking with Tony as he drove, but he glanced at Natasha through the rearview mirror and frowned at what he saw.

"No, I'm fine. Just... Just trying to get comfortable." Natasha said and it technically wasn't a lie, but she forced herself to stop moving so much anyway.

"Are you sure? You've been moving around a lot." Clint pointed out. It was then Natasha realized that everyone in the car was listening in on their conversation and she just wanted to go dig herself a hole and hide right now. She wasn't even sure why she was feeling shy about needing the bathroom - it wasn't like they were all so modest around each other all the time. Clint and Sam would sometimes even announce when they're going to take a dump, just to annoy some of the girls.

Still, Natasha felt the need to keep this to herself so she just nodded in response. What she was trying to achieve - she wasn't really sure. Based on what she could see on the GPS from where she was seated, she could tell that they still had a long way to drive. Knowing herself, she knows she won't be able to wait that long, but maybe she can wait long enough until Steve pulls over somewhere for gas or snacks or something.

When Clint didn't prod any further, Natasha felt herself sigh in relief before turning her attention back to the film. But really, she was focused more on her stomach and bladder than anything else. The belts weren't really helping her case either and she just kept squirming about.

"Steve I need to take a piss." Clint announced a little while later and really, that sounded like music to Nat's ears. In truth, Clint didn't really need to, but he was finally able to piece together what was wrong with Natasha. Figuring that she wasn't going to speak up about it herself, he decided to take things into his own hands.

"Next stop's about an hour away. Will you be able to wait until then?" Steve asked apologetically. Crap. Nat wasn't sure she could wait another hour anymore.

"No, not really." Clint shook his head. "I kind of need you to pull over somewhere soon."

"Just pull over to the side, there's a clearing of trees to the left. He should be fine going there." Tony suggested. Well, that wasn't what Natasha was hoping to hear. Now she just wanted to kick Clint in the shin for delaying their next proper pit stop. Much to Nat's dismay, Steve took Tony's suggestion and started to move them over to the side so he can park the car. Clint didn't look all-too pleased by this stop either which confused Natasha, but she had more important things to worry about now. Once the car was parked, Clint got himself unbuckled and left the car.

Tony and Steve were talking quietly with each other for a while and Nat could sense Steve kept glancing her way as they did. With a final nod to Tony, Steve went out of the car too, only to open the door to Natasha's left.

"Come on Nat, let's go and take a quick walk." Steve said quietly as he reached over to remove Nat's blanket, revealing that she was in fact still holding herself childishly.

"No um, I'm okay here. Let's just wait for Clint so we can get going as soon as he's back." Nat shook her head at Steve as he started to get her unbuckled.

"Well I just want to go out for some fresh air for a bit and thought it'd be good for you too." Steve said, ignoring Nat's further protests as he got her unbuckled and lifted her out of the car. Certainly, everyone by then had picked up on what was wrong with Nat but luckily they weren't saying anything about it. Steve just closed the car door before taking Natasha's hand and walking with her.

"Baby I can tell you need the bathroom, and I'm sorry but the next stop really is a while away. I don't think it's a very good idea for you to hold it that long." Steve said apologetically as soon as they were a few feet away from their car.

"So what? Are you telling me I should just crap myself?" Nat blurted out in annoyance before she could stop herself. She hadn't realized Steve thought she just needed to pee. Before she could think about it, her stomach cramped up again and she had to stop walking as she hunched over slightly with her free arm wrapped around her middle.

Steve then moved to crouch down in front of Nat and looked at her in concern. "Nat you're just hurting yourself. It's okay, just use your pull up. I'll clean you up as soon as you're done, I promise." He said in the most soothing voice he could muster.

"I'm not dropped." Nat said softly and she felt her face heating up in embarrassment. Logically she knows she won't make it an hour so really, she was just prolonging her agony.

"I know and it's okay. It happens to the best of us. Maybe your tummy just didn't agree with all that food and coffee this morning, I'm sorry. It's not your fault honey." He'd started rubbing soothing circles on the back of Nat's hand with his thumb and as small of a gesture that was, it did bring a little comfort.

"I'm going to move us over to behind that tree, okay?" Steve said as he nodded to the tree a few steps away when Natasha neither moved nor responded after some time. "No one's going to see while you go, and I promise it's okay."

Really, it wasn't like Natasha had much of a choice so she just wordlessly let Steve guide her. As soon as she was behind the tree, she crouched down on the ground and barely had to try before her movement just started. For his part, Steve stepped back a bit to give his Little some semblance of privacy, but he stayed close enough in case he was needed.

After some time, Natasha stood back up but she kept her head down to hide her tears and red face. She felt incredibly embarrassed and gross that she had to stand with her feet a little apart. Now that the pain was gone, it dawned on her that Steve would have to change her in the car and everyone would know what happened. From where she was looking down, Nat saw Steve's feet come into view as her Big stood in front of her.

"Do you want me to carry you back to the car, or do you want to walk?" He asked gently. Honestly, Natasha didn't think she could manage to walk back with this mess in her pants so she whispered a soft "up." At least then, she'd be able to hide her face, right? That was exactly what she did as soon as Steve lifted her up, being mindful of her bum.

The entire walk back to the car Steve was whispering reassurances into her ear but her mind was much too noisy to hear him. All she could think about was how humiliating the ordeal was and how she wanted the earth to just swallow her whole before they got to the car. Of course the universe wasn't on her side and they got back to the car unscathed.

"You need the car, Steve?" Clint asked once Steve opened the door. Upon hearing Clint's voice, Nat tightened her hold on Steve and tried to curl up into a smaller ball in his arms if that was possible.

"If that's alright, please." Steve rubbed Natasha's back soothingly. "Just need to take care of Nat for a minute."

Of course it was no problem for team and they went out of the car without further question. Steve thanked them sincerely but it was only after he climbed into the back he noticed that Bobbi was sitting in the middle row. "Um.."

"I'm here to help." Bobbi said as if she was pointing out the obvious. In fact, she was already digging through Tasha's diaper bag to grab the changing mat for Steve.

"I'm not sure how Nat feels about that." Steve said. He was still holding Natasha close to him as if protectively.

"Well I think Natasha can speak for herself, and she should remember I still owe her for that time she took care of me when I had food poisoning in Bahrain." Bobbi said as she handed the changing mat over to Steve.

"Food poisoning is putting it lightly." Natasha muttered, making Bobbi chuckle. Honestly, she'd prefer if it was just her and Steve but she had a feeling arguing with Bobbi wouldn't get them anywhere and she just really, really wanted out of her mess already.

"Yeah you know that was much worse, so if you think I'm not helping you out with this then I will seriously take offense you have little faith in our friendship." Bobbi said.

"Bobbi, please don't guilt her into it." Steve said and Nat could feel him shaking his head. She appreciated it, really. But Bobbi wasn't taking it.

"If Nat wants me to leave, she'll tell me to leave." Bobbi even sat more comfortably as if to make a statement. Steve sighed, but when Natasha didn't ask Bobbi to leave, he just fixed the mat on the back seat and lay Natasha down on top of it.

Nat was still blushing a bright red and she wasn't really in the mood to look at anyone, so she was childishly hiding her face behind her hands as she was lying there. "Bobbi can you grab me the wipes, please?" Steve asked as he tugged down Natasha's pants. Nat didn't even notice she whined until Steve all but cooed to her and soothingly rubbed one of her hips.

"So what did happen in Bahrain?" Steve asked after thanking Bobbi for handing him the wipes.

"Food poisoning to the tenth level." Bobbi said and you could almost hear her rolling her eyes. "Was going after a target in a bar and really, it was my fault for accepting a drink from him in the first place. Turns out he was one step ahead of us and knew about me and put something in my drink. I spent the rest of the mission uselessly projectile vomiting in the hotel room and just crapping myself."

"I told you I'd do it since he hadn't seen me yet but you were so insistent." Natasha muttered from behind her hands. They had to call in some back up to watch over Bobbi after the second day because Nat really did have to go through with the mission. She loved Bobbi but all that was avoidable if she just listened.

"I already acknowledged my stupidity, thank you very much." Bobbi said with an amused smile. "Anyway, Nat was really sweet about it - I mean, I could tell she despised me for getting sick--"

"I did not despise you--"

"--but she tirelessly took care of me until we got backup. Which was Clint, who was less than thrilled about playing nanny." Bobbi chuckled.

"Clint was told he was needed as a reinforcement. What he didn't know was that by reinforcement, Maria meant taking care of her Little so I could continue with the mission." Natasha informed Steve from behind her hands.

"Eh, he would've come even if Maria told him the truth." Bobbi said with a shrug.

"Yeah, he would have." Natasha said in agreement. The three of them were as close as can be since the early days and Clint was awfully protective of both girls. Though most of the time, Natasha was the logical, mature one who kept them out of trouble, at the end of the day Clint was the big brother who would do anything to make sure they're alright.

"Mhm, I mean I haven't heard much about your past missions before the Avengers, but it was obvious from the very beginning how close you three are." Steve commented before turning to Bobbi. "Can you hand me the diaper cream and another diaper, please?" Natasha hadn't even noticed Steve finished wiping her clean. It was then she realized that Bobbi was probably trying to distract her from her own embarrassment.

"Not gonna lie, I missed those two a lot when you guys formed. But hey, I got into way less trouble since then. And look, we're back working together so it all worked out--luckily they're not as troublesome as they were before. You probably set them straight." Bobbi said as he handed over the requested items to Steve.

"Excuse me?" Natasha had to pull her hands away from her face and that was when she saw that Bobbi was fighting hard to keep a serious expression on. Evidently, she was teasing and Natasha rolled her eyes in good nature.

"Oh yeah, Nat and Clint caused aaaall sorts of trouble in our early days" Steve played along as he applied some diaper cream on Natasha. "Always called me a fossil, kept trying to set me up with other female agents--"

"In my defense I didn't know you were into men that time." Natasha pouted. "Plus, you really are a fossil and please, those are all personal so you can't say I'm the troublemaker in the team. Clint though is a different story."

"I know baby, I'm just messing with you." Steve chuckled softly before leaning down and kissing Nat on the forehead. Nat couldn't help but smile at the affection, and maybe also from the sudden reassurance (albeit odd) she felt by having Bobbi there acting like this whole thing wasn't a big deal. She let Steve finish changing her without complaint until a thought occurred to her as Steve was helping her back into her sweats.

"Sorry, I could've changed myself." She said with a blush.

"Mmhm, but I like taking care of you." Steve said in the usual soothing tone he took with Natasha. Once Nat was redressed, Steve helped her sit back up before pulling her into his arms for a hug which Nat practically melted in.

"Can I sit with you up front?" Nat asked softly, her voice muffled since she had her face hidden in Steve's chest as they hugged. All the caretaking definitely made her a smidge clingier than she was earlier, and the thought of sitting away from Steve didn't sit so well with her. That, and she figured sitting in the front would be the best way to hide from the others for a while.

"I'm sorry Nat but you know you can't. You need to sit in your seat: The front's not safe for you." Steve said, soothingly playing with Natasha's hair as he did.

"But Steve..." Nat couldn't help but whine slightly and her grip on his shirt unconsciously tightened. Man, if these next couple of weeks are going to feel like a parkour between emotions on a _daily_ then Nat wasn't sure how she was going to survive.

"What if you hold your kitty?" It was Bobbi who suggested that. "She has Steve's voice, right? I mean, it's not Steve but it can be the next best thing."

"I think that's a good idea." Steve smiled and rubbed Natasha's back as he continued to hug her. "Baby I'm sorry I can't sit with you, but maybe holding Nini will help, hm? And you even have your cozy blanket from Clint. It'll only be for a little while more until we get to the cabin and then you can have all the cuddles you want."

"But Nini's for Tasha." Nat was glad she had her face hidden in Steve's chest right now because she was certain she was blushing a bright red. Have an accident, get changed, and need her stuffed toy while aged all in a span of five minutes?

"No, Nini's for Natasha. You can have her whenever you want, honey. Just like how you'll always have me regardless if you're dropped or not. Nini and I are here for all of you." Steve reminded her.

"Don't forget me and the rest of the crazy lot." Bobbi said. She was already opening Nat's bag to get said cat for her friend. "You can't shake us off that easily, Nat."

"Mhm, you've got a lot of people in your corner and they all love you no matter what." Steve reminded Natasha as he held one hand out to accept the cat from Bobbi. Somehow, Natasha sensed that her cat was nearby and she turned her head away from Steve's chest so she can check. When she saw the cat in Steve's hand, she fought the urge for five seconds. Five seconds was all it took for her to say ' _fuck it'_ and just reach for her comfort item.

"No one's going to mind if I have Nini right now?" Natasha asked almost timidly. She had the cat in one of her hands and she'd sat up already, but was still hesitant to actually hug it. You could've sworn Nat was holding a ticking time bomb from how uncertain she looked right now.

"No one will mind." Steve promised, and he sounded so sincere Nat had no choice but to believe him.

"Hey, you want me to sit up here with you?" Bobbi asked just as Natasha finally hugged Nini to her chest. Nat did notice Bobbi was taking a gentler tone with her now too, and she couldn't help but feel embarrassed. Since when did her friends use kid gloves with her? But then again this was Bobbi. Clint could read Natasha 95% of the time, but Bobbi was also a close second thanks to all the years they've spent together. Bobbi could probably tell Natasha needed some comfort despite wanting to just hide from everyone... And truly, she did.

"What about Maria, though?" Natasha asked, and both Steve and Bobbi noticed how she didn't say no.

"Maria'll be fine. I think she wants to sleep the rest of the drive so the extra space would be good too." Bobbi said. Honestly, that was enough for Natasha, at least right now. So she just nodded in response and let Steve reach over her so he can open the door and help her out. She avoided looking at anyone as she stepped out of the car and let Steve lift her back onto her seat and buckle her in.

"You're alright honey. It's just a little while longer." Steve said in a quiet, soothing tone once he got Natasha buckled. Tony and Maria had climbed back into the car and Clint was just waiting for Steve to step out so he can retake his seat too. "If your tummy starts to feel funny again, you tell me or Bobbi, okay?"

"Okay," Natasha said softly and she unconsciously tightened her hold on Nini. The thought of her tummy getting upset again did not sit well. "I think I'll be fine now though."

After making sure one more time that Natasha was buckled in safely, Steve climbed out and got back in behind the wheel so they can resume their drive.

Natasha waited for it. Waited for someone to comment on her accident, or poke fun at her for holding Nini. But a minute passed, then five, and none came. Not even any slight teasing whatsoever from Clint - he even draped her blanket back over her, acting as if nothing was out of the ordinary. The car was silent for a while and it was killing Natasha, but eventually quiet conversation was being made and it oddly enough soothed her. 

The rest of the drive to the cabin went a lot smoother from then, which Natasha was grateful for. By the time they arrived, everyone was dying to stretch their legs and Natasha didn't even fight Clint when he helped her out of her seat and the car.

"What do you think?" Steve asked as he stepped into place beside Natasha. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets and glanced at Nat with a smile before looking up at their cabin. Well, to say that Natasha would probably not want to go back to SHIELD anymore after their vacation would be putting it lightly. Nat rarely goes on vacation... But she had a hunch that this trip would be changing that.

Their home for the next couple of days was a simple two-story log cabin located right beside a serene, clear water lake. The sun was high up, but its rays weren't glaring and it didn't feel hot at all - the area was covered in trees which provided them ample shade and air definitely much fresher than the city's. Natasha spotted a chimney jutting from the roof and she hated to admit it, but she was actually looking forward to maybe snuggling by the fire with Steve one of these nights. Based on what Natasha gathered from their drive, there wasn't another residence within miles from their cabin which meant a peaceful and private stay for the group.

"I think we'll have to find a way to just stay here and never go back." She jokingly responded to Steve which got him to chuckle.

"That I can agree with you on." Steve shook his head in amusement. "How about we grab our stuff and check if the inside's worth risking our butts with Fury for too."

It was Natasha's turn to chuckle, but she nodded in agreement and followed Steve to the back of their car so she can grab her bags. As she was grabbing her luggage, Clint came up to her with Nini in one of his hands.

"You left her in the car and I thought you might want her back," Clint said as he held out the cat to Natasha, who put down one of her bags first so she can take the cat, "your blanket's with Bobbi, so if you need or want it just let her know, yeah?"

"Sorry. I could've grabbed them myself." Natasha was just feeling a little flustered that her friends were picking up after her even when she wasn't dropped.

"Nat please, if you're going to apologize for every single thing we do for you, can you just write us a coupon for infinite apologies or something?" Clint said, rolling his eyes in good nature as he reached into the back of the car to grab his bags as well. "I'm going to run out of ways to say that it's no big deal or that you don't need to apologize at this rate."

Before Nat could reply though, Steve walked up to them and took one look at Natasha then at the bag by her feet. "Honey do you want help with your bag? I think your hands are a little full there." Steve said.

Initially, Natasha thought maybe Steve was teasing her. But then she looked at him and she could tell that Steve was being genuine - of course he was. This was Steve, for crying out loud. Perhaps sensing that she wasn't going to respond anytime soon, Steve just gave her a reassuring smile and reached for her luggage anyway. Nat didn't protest and just hugged Nini with her free arm before following Steve inside.

Of course the inside of the cabin didn't disappoint either and Steve took his time showing Natasha around. While the first floor held all the common space, the second was where all the bedrooms were. Steve took Natasha upstairs after showing her the back patio.

"And this is going to be yours and Bobbi's room." Steve said as he opened the door to the said room. It was located farther down the hall and away from the stairs - Nat had a feeling Steve did that on purpose for Tasha.

"Mine and Bobbi's?" Nat asked with a slight frown once Steve's words sunk in. For some reason she half-expected to be rooming with Steve during their vacation so she was a bit surprised.

"Yeah baby, I thought it'd be fun for you if you room with one of your sisters." Steve said as he walked inside and Nat hesitantly followed him in. The room wasn't huge which was probably the tradeoff for the cabin having a good number of bedrooms to begin with, but it was definitely cozy. There were two twin beds inside, so Nat was curious as to why it was only her and Bobbi sharing the room but decided not to speak up about it. "Mine and Tony's room is just across the hall and you can always come in when you want or need to, okay?" Right, Nat should have known Steve would be rooming with Tony.

"Yeah, okay." Was all Nat could manage as a response. She still wasn't completely comfortable about being away from Steve, but then she told herself to suck it up. At least she had Bobbi, right?

"Everyone else's rooms are on this floor too. Clint's is the one right next to yours - he's rooming with Lincoln and Sam." Natasha knew Steve was trying to reassure her that she had her "safe" people nearby and she appreciated it. "Are you okay with this arrangement, or do you want to switch some things up?"

Personally, Natasha would prefer to room with Steve especially considering she was still prone to accidental drops... But she assumed Steve just wanted some alone time with Tony too, or maybe at least a little time away from Natasha. "No, it's fine. Thanks, Steve." She said with a small smile.

"Of course baby." Steve smiled. "While we're here, did you want to drop?"

"No, it's okay." Nat was already feeling a little fuzzy, but she didn't feel like it was an impending drop so she figured she can hold off for a little while. "Maybe later, if that's alright?"

"That's not a problem as long as you're not resisting your drops." Steve said in a gentle yet knowing voice. "I trust you, okay? I'm going to go down and make lunch - are you alright here or do you want to come with me?"

"I'll come down in a bit, I think I'll change out of these first." Natasha said as she glanced down at herself before looking back up at Steve. She still had her diaper on and she would love to take it off already, thank you very much. Luckily Steve understood and left Natasha to her own devices after making sure one more time that she'll be fine by herself.

Once Steve left, Natasha took her time to get changed and even started unpacking some of her stuff. She was making the most of what would probably be one of the very few moments of peace and quiet she'd have on this trip. It was a crowded cabin, there was no denying that. Plus, Nat took the time to try and clear her head. By the time she was done and went back downstairs, the rest of their team had arrived.

Everyone was mulling about and checking things out, while some of the Bigs were in the kitchen preparing lunch with Steve. Nat wasn't in much of a mood to socialize, so she went for the least occupied area which oddly enough, was the living room. Only Skye was there and she was just lounging on one of the sofas, mindlessly scrolling through her phone. That was exactly what Natasha needed - distracted company.

She plopped down on one of the armchairs and took out her phone so she could continue that e-book she started the other week.

"Hey," Nat hadn't even gone through half of one page before Skye spoke up, "I uh, I'm sorry for getting you to trip yesterday. I didn't mean to hurt you or something."

That was probably the last thing Natasha expected to hear from Skye. "Don't worry about it, it wasn't your fault I'm just clumsy on my feet when I'm Tasha." Nat chuckled softly and shook her head to herself because she really did see it that way.

"Yeah well, I'm still sorry." Skye said. If Nat didn't know any better, she would've thought that Skye did sound like she felt awfully bad about it for some reason. Of course Nat didn't get why Skye would feel that way because it was just an accident, so she decided to just brush it off.

"It's fine, really." Nat reassured her.

"So... Are you excited for this? I mean, all the plans?" Skye asked and Nat had to hold back a sigh. She really wasn't in the right state to socialize and she assumed she and Skye would just sit in silence like they usually did when no one else was around - they weren't really the closest in the team to begin with.

"Mhm, looking forward to it." Nat said as she reread the same sentence for the 4th time. Her head was just feeling a little clouded and she didn't have the capacity to both read and talk to Skye at the same time. But Nat would feel bad if she gave half-assed efforts in this conversation, especially since she and Skye didn't really talk much. "What about you? Looking forward to a week's worth of break?"

"Oh definitely." Skye chuckled and Nat could hear the smile in her voice. She glanced up from her phone to look at Skye, but Skye was still looking down at her own phone as they talked so Nat went back to her book too.

Nat could feel the awkwardness between them and it wasn't sitting well with her. People knew Natasha as one of SHIELD's best agents -- being able to go undercover and taking on any role with ease. It was no problem for Nat to socialize or put herself out there for work. But Natasha found it harder to do so for personal matters. Natasha absolutely despised small talk, which was why she always stuck with the chatterboxes like Clint or Sam because then usually, the attention would be drawn to them.

Now though, it was just her and Skye and the awkwardness was driving her insane. It was as if she felt obligated to keep a conversation going, but at the same time the energy in the room didn't warrant that. Naturally, Natasha tried to find a way out of it.

"I think I'm going to go head out for a bit," Natasha said as she pocketed her phone, "just going to get some fresh air out back." She said mostly to excuse herself from Skye, but also to let Skye know where she would be in case anyone would come looking for her.

For her part, Skye just nodded and looked up to glance at Natasha as the latter stood and left the room. Her relationship with Skye was definitely something Natasha needed to work on, especially since they worked together a lot now.

It had been a long discussion: Partnering up the Avengers with Coulson's team. As expected, a lot were against the idea seeing as the Avengers were usually called for well, Avengers level threats. It didn't sit well with either party that Coulson's team would be thrown into great danger for the purposes of training. It was reckless.

But Fury insisted, and what Fury wanted, Fury got (most of the time). As Natasha stepped out back and closed the screen door behind her, she thought back to their first mission with Coulson's team. It had been a disaster. They weren't coordinated at all and no one was listening to anyone. Well, except Steve. Steve was always --

Just as Natasha started thinking about Steve, she felt it coming. "Not now." Natasha muttered to herself as she felt her head starting to get fuzzy again. "Crap." She groaned, knowing she wasn't supposed to fight her drops.

She couldn't very well drop alone outside, so she turned to head back in and look for Steve. But just as she was about to open the door, it was like a switch flipped and where Nat earlier stood, Tasha had taken her place.

The toddler was disoriented and quite frankly, a little upset that it seemed like no one else was around. She was about to throw a Natasha-sized tantrum when suddenly, a blue butterfly flew by. Tasha watched as the butterfly flew past her and of course, the toddler was amazed. Her upset was soon forgotten as Tasha moved away from the door and followed the butterfly further out back until eventually, she passed the line of trees that marked the border between the cabin and the forest.

Back in the cabin, Steve was in the kitchen making lunch with Tony and Sam. Or so they were trying to.

"Alright let me cut right to the point then," Sam said as he chopped up some vegetables, "you want to talk about what happened yesterday?"

"Yesterday?" Steve asked with his eyebrows furrowed. He didn't look up from where he was frying some chicken. "I told you, it's fine Sam. Nat barely got scratched and it's not a big de--"

"Not that." Sam rolled his eyes. "Tony here told me you snapped at him and Fitz while you guys were fixing Tasha's room."

"I did not sna--"

"Said you threatened to bang them on the head with your shield," Sam interrupted as he finally looked up and raised an eyebrow at Steve, and then Tony suddenly piped in.

"Not the kind of banging I'd have hoped for." No filters with this one. Absolutely no filters. Steve nearly burned himself when Tony made that comment.

"No I think you'd do the banging, to be honest." Sam said.

"Crap." Steve actually burned himself on the stove then, just as Sam whispered an "I told you so" all-too loudly to Tony just as Tony said "language".

"Anyway point being," Sam shook his head and steered the conversation back on track, "you want to talk about that? You never snapped like that before, at least to our knowledge. And surely not over something as small as using the wrong covers for Tasha's cot." Yeah Steve's emotions may have been a tad bit overboard that afternoon.

"Listen, I was just tired. I didn't mean to snap, and I truly am sorry for that threat and my overall attitude that afternoon." Steve apologized sincerely. "There's nothing we need to talk about. I genuinely was just overtired." He lied through his teeth. Steve knew that wasn't the case, but he was working on it. Surely, Tony and Sam hadn't picked up on what was really wrong, right?

"You know, I don't think it's just Nat who needs to work on separation issues." Tony commented lightly, and Steve's grip on the tongs tightened. "Nat may get all emotional and exceptionally needy when she's separated from you, but you my dear friend. You get incredibly feisty."

"I do not get feisty. I don't have separation issues. Can we just let this go?" Steve spoke in a bit of a harsher tone than he meant to.

"See? Feisty." Tony said, completely unfazed by Steve's sudden change in mood. "You're not even technically separated from her. You're under the same roof and you're already this way."

"That's because this isn't about separation issues," Steve tried to speak more calmly. He didn't want to admit that he thought they were right, because in his head Steve had to keep it together for Natasha. Nat was having a hard time adjusting to all the changes, so he can't worry about his own mess right now. "It was a long drive, and I'm just tired."

"Steve cut the crap. You're having separation issues and the sooner you accept it, the sooner we can start to address it." Sam said. "We're not berating you, and we're not holding this against you. Come on, man. We just want to help. You think hiding all this is going to do you any good? What if the inevitable happens and later down the line, Nat's called for a mission that you're not part of and she's gone for days? Nat would've addressed her issues by then but what about you?"

"Alright, alright." Steve grit his teeth. "You've made your point." Steve said with a sigh as he placed some chicken onto a plate. He didn't look at his friends though and just continued frying the rest. He wasn't used to being the one who needed help being put together so this entire situation was making him uncomfortable.

"So I'm guessing the two of you are bringing this up now because you talked about this and have come up with some brilliant plan." Steve said with an eyebrow quirked.

"Well it's quite simple, really." Tony said. "It won't even require much from anyone. We thought maybe we could work on not having the two of you tied to the hip 24/7."

"It doesn't have to be anything big like separating the two of you for hours on end." Tony continued before Steve could protest. "Even the small things like maybe Nat could walk with me instead of you when we're heading somewhere, you know? It'll put both of you at ease too: To see that it's not just you who's out here caring for Nat."

"That... Actually makes sense." Steve mumbled.

" _Actually?_ Of course it does." Tony scoffed. "It's still your vacation to you know, figure out this whole heartmate thing together. So Sam and I thought separating you two would defeat the purpose of the trip. At least this way, we can hit two birds with one stone." He shrugged, though Tony looked a little too pleased with himself.

Steve was about to respond, but just then Bobbi came running into the kitchen. She looked a little disheveled and you could see the worry in her face. Before Steve could even process that something might be wrong, Bobbi spoke the last words he wanted to hear at the moment.

"Steve, it's Nat." Bobbi said with a deep frown. "We can't find her anywhere."


End file.
